Children, work, and my wife! I haven’t been to Lodge in years. I just can’t find time. I know if I just took time and went to Lodge I would feel like I’m neglecting my family and I couldn’t really dedicate myself to the Lodge and Brothers either. I hate to think I’m gonna have to wait until I’m retirement age....

Family first.  Does your lodge have a Christmas party, family picnic or other family activities?

Yes, it has.  I am not a "joiner".  It seems to me if you get more than three people in a group, all they do is argue.  If work is involved,  a few do all the work, and the rest of the group bitch about how the work was done. Add in pettiness and other elements.  

Any group I have been involved with seems to go down this path.  I would be interested to hear how the Masons can possibly avoid this pitfall.

My lodge life is awesome.

Family and job comes first.. but all my friends are in Lodge and I am an active member.
Some of the bullshit you guys deal with at a place thats not supposed to have issues is saddening.

I took a new job last November and have missed the lodge for a while.

I try not to let it, but sometimes it does keep me away. I look at our stated meeting as the business part of lodge, and like staff meeting at work, they are a necessary evil if you will. Oddly, I enjoy traveling to other lodges for their meetings more than going to our own even though my home lodge is devoid of the drama I see others on here dealing with.

The biggest problem I have with my lodge is the pressure to join the line. Life gets in the way of the memory work more than the meetings.

that right there is one reason many guys stay home.

Yes it is, and I have told them that.
That being said, in a lodge with only about 10 active members, it's to be expected. Some of our members have been in the East four or more times.

I've never seen anyone pressured unto a line.  We have repeat offenders, guys that did chairs more than once, but we've never pressured a guy into the line.

"Would you like to be in the line?"

"No, things are too busy right now."

"Let us know if that changes.  We're happy to see you when you come."

I was presiding officer of six organizations at the same time.  Four for the second time, including a Grand body, one for the third.  But that was on me.  We were letting the younger guys work the chairs without jumping.

We need to remember ours is a volunteer organization:  both in to and out of.

That's unfortunate.  The Brothers need to pay more attention to the last two lines of the Senior Warden's duties.  They're recited twice at every Communication.

I'm not active in the Scottish Rite because of how busy my life is.  I hit the Blue Lodge about once a month or every other month.

Somewhat.  I missed the stated meeting this month taking my daughter to college and missed a degree last night for my 25th wedding anniversary.  I have not made it to a work day (renovating our lodge building, long term project we are addressing as we have funds) this year because I am usually supervising Rainbow Girls and/or DeMolay as I am advisor for both groups.  With a son in DeMolay and a daughter in Rainbow we are going everywhere as a family anyway.  I would like to be everywhere and do everything for lodge, but knowing I can't I try to invest my time where I believe I can do the most good.

I would love to pursue the Scottish Rite, maybe make an OES meeting here or there,  but I know they would both further take away time from Blue Lodge.  So for now I'll stick with what I am doing.

you are doing way more than enough.

Your cable tow is long brother. Good on you.

Since moving I haven't gotten involved in the local lodge. It's pretty small and appears inactive. I may look at the lodge in the next town because I know it's much larger but I feel guilty not supporting the lodge where I live. In tge mean time I am supporting neither but do still pay dues in my old lodge. I need to figure this out and act.

I haven’t been to my Lodge in 16 years or so. Being Promoter of Finance for my girl’s Bethel is going to get me back into some Lodge meetings this year.

I need a Rusty Trowel session.

I've been working 3rd shift for the past 11 years, and I wont see 1st Shift for at least 5 more years...

It's a shame too, as I really enjoyed my time going through the chairs. Unfortunately, I never made it past JW.

51yrs and we've never had anyone repeat any position....

That's great!

I support my local Shriners by showing a car at their charity event every year.  They just had it a few weeks ago.

I mean this very gently. Don't mean you any insult at all.

But, if you can't take a couple of hours for yourself EVER, that sounds like a choice.

Even if not a business meeting (which can be tedious, indeed).

A holiday party (bring your wife), a charitable activity, something in the community.

Maybe you just choose to spend your time elsewhere. Which is fine. But not the same as being so jammed for time that you can't ever make it.

I have always felt too busy to attend meetings.   ( I know I'm not really much busier than anyone else)

I have not attended a regular meeting in years. (10+)

Last night a member picked me up for our annual meeting and forced my hand.
I am glad I went, and disappointed how little I remember.
I plan to become a more regular member in the future.

This. And I moved an hour away.
The old dudes killed my lodge with all there petty power struggles, so I had stopped going.
It's hard to get interested again since I've got so much going on.
There's some young guys there now that seem to really do good work.
I keep my dues paid but need to either demit or move to a closer lodge, although I'm not sure I would attend regularly.

About to Lodge shop myself, I am a PM at my Lodge and the same person needs to control EVERYTHING.  My year was the first in several where he did not as he was doing other GL duties at the time, and what do you know? The Lodge still stands and we got things done. As much as you bring things up among the other PMs or Brothers,  no one wants to talk about the elephant in the room.  More than likely going to drop my letter by years end, I have a year to find another Lodge after that.

We have one really old guy. He's our Chaplain, past master, very experienced Mason. Knows the memory work completely by heart.

He's a real takeover kid. Corrects the WM publicly during meetings. Not for getting stuck in his lines or whatever where someone might throw him the next one, but for "doing it wrong".

When we nominated officers for this year he nominated spoilers for a few guys who were running unopposed (mostly agreed on ahead of time - small lodge).  Most of them declined. One accepted and lost. Nobody else did this even once.

Not nearly enough to ruin the experience, but he's a pain in the ass. I can see how one or a few of that type could make a lodge miserable. I'm new so I roll with it.

Sir,
While I understand what you’re attempting to say, it’s not an accurate statement to state if he can’t take a couple hours ever.
Lodge are certain days for a couple hours only, if he can’t line that up due to unfortunate timing, then he can’t. If lodge were 9-5 M-F and he couldn’t line it up, I’d tend to agree you are correct...but too often I have been unable to attend meetings due to work meetings and deadlines and or family events. Family first! Your family counts on you to be present and (hold onto your hats Brethren- I know this will floor some of you)are far more important than sitting in a business meeting for a couple hours. Any Brother that disagrees with family first needs to re-evaluate their life priorities.
Also, not all lodges hold parties and/or social events and community activities...sadly.

Been about 4 years, I'm on the road most of the year.  I used to visit the local lodges but time has been in short supply, I miss it.

Just after being raised about 9 years ago, my lodge melted down.  The master and jr PM were removed for electioneering.  The old-timers all drifted away.  We barely had enough people to open a lodge.

In about two years, we  fought our way back from that to having twenty regulars with no repeaters.  It was awesome.  We were doing all of our degrees with our lodge members only. We had 5-6 candidates training at any time. We were raising money for scholarships. Every officer could perform every chair.  The wardens and master could each perform all of the degrees.

Then two guys, who were were more concerned about badges, coins, awards, tuxedos and fancy dinners moved up.  Neither one could open lodge or do any of the chairs without huge blunders.  They didn’t care at all about the rituals.  We stopped raising money for anything.  These guys who didn’t know the work were training candidates. Then they  started recruiting relatives and friends.  The lodge experience just went to hell.

Then the elections came.  There was no one in line with any ritual skill or character.  The busybodies started games with the elections.  Some really great men got passed over so that boyfriends and buddies could move up.

I put in a tremendous amount of work as master and treasurer, only to see these fools let it drift away. I can’t bear to go back and watch them come in drunk and stuff their faces with food paid for by the lodge and then ask the lodge to pay for their pet projects and trinkets.

I’m sorry for making such a public rant.  It just burns.  So I will probably wait a few months and look for another lodge.

The lesson here, is Guard the West Gate. Focus on rituals. Stand tough on character.

Emigrated over here 19 years ago and visited a few local lodges with a view to joining one of them, none seemed to be the right fit for me.

Only time I have set foot in a lodge is back in the UK at my mother lodge when we go back for vacations

I just realized, I miss my Freemasonary

I may try again in 2019

There is nothing wrong with moving to a new Lodge if you are not satisfied with the experience you are having with your current one.  If things are stacked that badly, and things are not going to change anytime soon than perhaps it is time to move on.

I have an endowed membership.  So I don’t even have to send in a check.

But thanks for the comments.  I could use a change.

Brother Beer Slayer I have found your posts to show the character of a fine and upstanding Mason. Your love of, and respect for the craft are always evident.

It is a sad thing that you have been repulsed by FMINO members. I hope that you soon find a home lodge that you can help flourish.

Today was another Masonic Day of Light in Oshkosh.  27 new Masons.

Warren Chapter #8 Royal Arch Masons Entered Apprentice Degree Team.  I'm very proud of them!  They did great work.

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I haven’t been to lodge in years .

I was thinking of going .  Maybe I should

The official count is 28.

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Yes, you should.

Now that I am retired I will start going.

During my time as a mason before I was married, I attended my lodge and visited other lodges several days a week.  After serving as WM in the lodge and several years as WP in Eastern Star my wife and I needed a rest.  Now my job requires me to travel 3-5 days a week making it difficult to attend lodge functions.  I miss attending and hope to become active again when I stop working.

i stayed away for at least half a year untill the recent chair changes after being raised as group of 3, which had originally started as a group of 4, but the 4th guy turned out to be a shitbag in my opinion, yet they still let him get raised after it got to the point that the DDGM had to come in for a lodge vote and barely passed to not go further in charges. our group filed 13 charges against him with some of them being asking via text if it was ok to sleep with a shriners daughter (not married/not dating), one of the guys in the group had jewish heritage found out from one of those DNA sites and the guy made the comment "that it was enough to goto the gas chamber", would send us homoerotic photos in the group chat, was only trying to do 25% of learning his memorization instead of the 100% that we were taught to learn. claimed we had some secret PDF of all the obligation written out and that the father of one of the guys in our group (who was a former PM from a lodge outside the state) had given it to us and "thats why we had learned our parts so quickly compared to him ". this coming from the guy who was an ICU nurse, so we know hes not dumb. the PM of last year did not give us confidence in his abilities and mental capabilities as we as FC's knew the state digest better than he did. after the vote via lodge they didnt even give him a slap on the wrist, but gave some BS excuse "that the lodge had failed him/us, and hell learn from this"(handjerk motion), guess what, after the last guy got raised, we have rarely seen him in lodge and has rarely been to a practice for his MM return, if he even does it. this was just the tip of the iceberg of what was wrong. little stuff like our newly raised group was able to do our MM return and completed MM 1-3 training in 2 months after raising, yet the group before us had been MM for over a year and hadnt given their return nor practiced, nor done MM 1,2,3 which is required here to sit in the chairs. but you know what i did to take the negative and turn it into the positive, i travelled like hell, to every lodge in the district, i sat in on their lodges and sat back and listened to what they were doing right and doing wrong and how they were helping their community & i helped other lodges over helping my very own. i didnt join to collect a ring and a badge, i joined to give back to my local community and to give a hand up to the next person in life, as someone had helped me along in life and it was only fair that i return the favor. this year is going to be interesting, the elders complain about membership decline and the chicken little speech that the lodge will close, yet they dont want to embrace change / let the younger guys take leadership roles and embrace their ideas. sorry for being long winded but this was a thorn in my side for a while.

Not really. Wish I had the ability to commit to more appendant bodies. But I can never even make it to YR cause it falls..without fail, on drill weekend for Guard every. single.month.

I am pretty regular at blue Lodge, attend LOI and help with what I can in YR but am definitely looking forward to leaving the service and freeing up my weekends again.
We have a pretty spry line in the chairs so it would be great to get to progress through the line.