Welcome home from the Syrian war, soldier.
What's that? It wasn't a war? That's not what I heard...
Well why not? Who? CIA? What? Oh hell, I don't know about all the details on that stuff. Too complicated haha. Besides, who cares if you were dropping off pallets of guns and ammo to kids. Their kids are savages. Not like American kids amirite?
Say....you don't have any of those assault rifles or other weapons of war, do you? We don't want the kind of stuff here like they had there lol.
While you were gone we decided those aren't really the kind of things citizens should have. You understand, right? I mean, what do Americans need with something like that?
What's that? Oh, freedom? Yeah, harumphf... yeah...
Anyway, make sure and get anything like that turned in. Too dangerous. Like I said...welcome back, son. Glad to have you back and, uh, stay safe. Wear your mask, ok? We're having a party on the 4th. Come on by, OK? BEER!!!