So, one of my first gigs out of law school was working for U.S. Customs and Immigration Service.  I left that pretty quick because government work pays fuck all and I'd interned with a bunch of oil companies and the Barnett Shale was in full bloom.  Ironically, I still ended up doing an OK amount of immigration law because one of the first land companies I worked for really liked to hire Eastern European strippers as staff and/or landmen.  Between 2009-2011, I probably had about 4-5 girls at The Lodge as clients.

Which, honestly, some of the best clients ever.  They paid up front and did what they said they'd do.  They also listened to your advice and were honestly, pretty solid citizens.  I never married myself; but it was a fun experience.  Also set unrealistic expectations for future clients.

Disclaimer: I won't be offering legal advice because A) I don't do that for free and B) I haven't practiced in those areas for so long, I'm not competent to give advice.

How many did you sleep with?

I don't sleep with clients.  However, I did go to their parties and such and meet their friends.  I did date one of the friends and then help her get her mom's green card gratis.  Lawyerly distinctions, I'm sure.

How do I Wed a hot young refugee without getting scammed?

Over the years, I have worked with two different people who had mail order brides.

One never wants to be home.

The other is a miserable bastard. Seems to be his natural demeanor though, so the wife may had nothing to do with it.

Well, there's no good answer to this.  Refugees are people just like anyone else.  Some will drug you and steal your organs, some will be the most loyal partners/friends ever.  You just have to trust your gut.

I can say when a stripper tells you "I don't date customers" it generally means one of the following:

1) I'm in a serious relationship and my deadbeat partner appreciates you supporting his/her lifestyle.
2) I don't date you.

Strippers almost exclusively date customers because the biggest hurdle they have to close interpersonal relationships is that they're a stripper.  Customers already know that and the strippers have plenty of time to size them up as marriage potential.

I hang around that particular immigrant community a lot.  It definitely attracts creepy people.  At the same time, the majority are pretty red-blooded Americans raising families.  But there are definitely some good weirdo stories.

Also, this AMA is going to pause for about 10 hours shortly.

So your inards have alot to do with it?  lol.

Ok, I'll play.

What would you say the average initial cost of such an arrangement is? Purchase price + lawyerin'.

Well, I didn't get involved in any purchase price deals, which from what I gathered are very YMMV, and the lawyerin' deals were based on 2011 pricing.  Just the INS fees alone are going to be close to a thousand - and that's before trying to retrieve the original birth certificate from her village in Siberia.  I tried to do a favor for one of them last year recommending to another lawyer and buddy pricing was another $2.5k in legal fees.

Sssooo.... cheaper than the usual way.

pics or it nevah happened