Alright, I've let this go long enough. I'd rather do this with a phone call (you were online when I IM'd you my home phone number), but you don't want to call. That's fine, man.
Last night, somebody posted a link to my site and a bunch of people who aren't usually in the chat section of my site showed up. A bunch of people noted the "Donate" link on my site and kicked down a few bucks. For those who aren't typically chatting with me, or watching my broadcasts, here's the thing about that:
It's a DONATION. If you like the entertainment and feel like kicking down a buck or two, go for it. If not...fine. It keeps the broadcast going, because at this point - having lost my job, it's an "extra" expense I really don't need. I can't justify paying for the bandwidth, the internet connection on the client side that's dedicated to it, or the server space, when I'm out of work. I LOVE entertaining you guys, but it's an extra expense that's really hard to justify to the Mrs (or to myself, objectively).
If you've hung out in the chat, you'll know that people have joked around and said "where's the garage fridge?", and I've said "kick down a buck or two, and I'll buy one". And people did. The donate link isn't there, because I'm out of a job and I want people to give me money to pay the bills. To pull that off, people would have to donate something like $2,000/mo and I do NOT want or need that. It's just there, so folks can say "thanks" and help keep the broadcasts going (or kick down some bread for a fridge in the garage, or whatever - it's all in good fun).
Regarding thanks - I have gone out of my way to thank EVERYONE who has donated. It means a lot to me that people care that much. One member (who will remain nameless, as I believe giving is a private matter) sent me $100 in cash, because he hates Paypal. I called him and thanked him personally, because I knew who he was. He knows who he is too, so if he wants to post here, he will. If not - fine.
Capnrob, you're one of my favorite arfcommers. I mean that. I really had no idea you gave me $20. When I check my PP account, all I see are people's real names and addresses. I don't know who they are online. My God, there are people who watch this stuff and they're not even members here. I have no idea who most of them are. Folks kick down $1 or $2 periodically throughout the day, and I have no way of knowing who they all really are. If you mentioned it in the chat, I missed it. I'm truly sorry. Last night, I was three sheets to the wind having a good time entertaining everyone, and to be honest - I'll bet you were just a bit when you commented on me in this thread. I have a feeling come morning, you'll feel kind of bad about it.
What you said kind of hurt me. I didn't expect somebody like you to say I had no manners, or that I was ungrateful. When you donate money for personal reasons, how can I be anything but extremely grateful? You don't have to do that, but you do for reasons that are your own, and I appreciate it more than you know. It means a lot to me.
I was away from my computer all day today doing other things. When I came back tonight, somebody linked me to this thread and said you were upset. I was floored. I honestly had no idea you donated, and I had no idea how much my not thanking you upset you. It really is a completely honest misunderstanding. I felt REALLY bad about it, and I wanted to talk to you on the phone instead of doing it on a forum. You don't want to do it that way I guess, so here I am.
Dude, from the bottom of my heart - and to EVERYONE who has ever saw fit to kick down a few bucks - THANK you. You do not have to do it, and the fact that you do anyway means the world to me. I really do enjoy doing these entertaining broadcasts for everyone. People tell me all the time how much they enjoy them, and I've got lots of neat stories from guys overseas who have passed the time watching a goofy guy in a JD hat act a fool, or play tunes. When people hit that tiny little donate link on my site, or send me a nice IM or email, it warms my heart. The ONLY reason I do these, is because people enjoy them. If that ever stops, so will I.
So again, thank you. Please don't be upset with me, and please understand that it kills me that something I neglected to do upsets you (especially you). All I want to do is make people happy - I don't want them upset at me. Please don't be angry with me, and please understand that I didn't mean anything by it. It's an honest mistake.
If you want me to return the $20, I'd be more than happy to. The donations are just nice gestures, and I don't want something like $20 cause any strife between me and an arfcommer I really like.
Again, thanks, man.