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Posted: 8/22/2017 7:48:52 PM EDT
[#1]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Yup. That would be my concern. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 7:49:50 PM EDT
[#2]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Whatever the Will states.  My parents advised me last year that they are making me the Executor of their will and then went over the will with me. I wouldn't do everything that they are doing in their will, but it's their money and their wishes. Follow the will to the letter. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 7:49:55 PM EDT
[#3]
You probably will want to make a consultation with a lawyer that handles these type of issues in the state your mother lived in.
I would not have any contact with the step siblings until you receive appropriate legal advice regarding the will. From what you have said, and if your lawyer gives the OK, I doubt I would give the step siblings any money since it sounds like they got plenty money when your mother was alive. They got to have fun and party and you were there and were the caretaker. If the will is valid according to your lawyer and you are to get 100% of the money, why change it? I'd say if the lawyer says it will not mess anything up with the will and you getting your 100% of money, you may consider giving the step siblings personal things like pictures. But i'd only do that with the lawyer's permission and if it is something you want to do. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 7:50:52 PM EDT
[#4]
Tell them that you are going to honor your mothers wishes.
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Posted: 8/22/2017 7:51:29 PM EDT
[#5]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Its not your money, its your mom's money amd her wish was you get it all. She made a conscientious decision and stuck to it. Honor her last wish. Donate half to charity if you have moral issues. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Its not your money, its your mom's money amd her wish was you get it all. She made a conscientious decision and stuck to it. Honor her last wish. Donate half to charity if you have moral issues. I don't think that's going to be the issue for him. The possible issue is if the OPs mother was actually the one to modify his step-dads will, prior to his death. That's what the OP alluded to. Playing devils advocate...I can see how they may be entitled to a portion of their fathers estate if she cut them out of it. Now if the OPs step-dad told his Mom "my kids are ungrateful good for nothing turds, I want them cut out of my will..." and he cut them out of his will himself...then they should get nothing. Edit: Quoted:
Reread. I believe the stepfather and mother alter will before his death to 100% op, not that his mother did it after the stepfather passed. Unless theybargue that the stepfather had diminished capacity when it we rewritten I don't think they can use that. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 7:53:06 PM EDT
[#6]
After you get a lawyer, anytime one of them brings it up just tell them to
refer to your attorney. It is now in his hands, so let him deal with it. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 7:53:26 PM EDT
[#7]
Quoted:
She changes will to I get 100%. Don't cave to any family member, step or otherwise, who suddenly is all about family when there's money to be had, but treated your mother and father like she didn't exist while she was here. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 7:57:35 PM EDT
[#8]
If you give them a dime, they will sue you for more.
If it is a valid will then honor it and spend some $$$ on a charity she may have liked. My Dad stipulated that ANY contesting of his will was a 100% automatic disqualification of receiving any, partial and all proceeds from the estate and they would be struck from it. As executor, it made my life VERY easy. We had zero fights about anything. If your Mom changed her will due to her stepkids behavior and lack of attention as she aged then that is a quite valid reason. PS, send then all a notarized copy of the most recent will recording all changes. Send them NOTHING else. No bank statements, no other paperwork, NOTHING. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 7:58:07 PM EDT
[#9]
If you gave them all of it, it still wouldn't be enough. "F" them get a good lawyer.
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Posted: 8/22/2017 7:58:16 PM EDT
[#10]
So they used your parents, weren't there for them when they needed them; I'd say F off and tell them not to worry about YOUR inheritance.
Also sorry for your loss. (Loss of Parents not loss of step bro/sister) |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 7:58:57 PM EDT
[#11]
Do as your Mom's will states. Have a reading of the will, cut ties, and go on with your life.
I wish you much good fortune and sympathy for the lost of your Mother. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 7:59:35 PM EDT
[#12]
Let THEM lawyer up. Don't give them shit.
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:00:03 PM EDT
[#13]
Do what the Will says. Consult your Attorney. Once the estate is settled, give each a copy of the will and an agreement to sign away any claims. Agreement gets them a Gift...what ever the max in one year is per IRS. If either says no, they both get nothing and the gift is your attorney's retainer for any future action they may take.
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:03:10 PM EDT
[#14]
I'm guessing the initial Will with your mom and step-dad was if they died at the same time, e.g. both pass in a car crash.
Once your step-dad died and his estate was probated, your mother later drafted her own Will, which was her right. If step-dad wanted his kids to inherit something without your mother interfering he could have handled that in his own Will. I would honor your mother's wishes. In many states four months is barely enough to scratch the surface of probate; my mother's estate took year to settle just because of the process that had to be followed (submitting inventory to the court, notification of creditors, public notices in the paper, etc.). Bear in mind that if you give your step-sibs more than $14k in a year you will owe gift tax on that. You will also be handing them the cash they need to retain an attorney so they can sue for what they think is their share. While they may try to sue you - actually the estate - do they even have enough to scrape together to cover an attorney's retainer? |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:03:34 PM EDT
[#15]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Your duty as executor is to do your best to honor the wishes of the departed. Follow your mothers wishes and have an attorney ready to go. Nothing for those deadbeats. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:03:42 PM EDT
[#16]
Give them their father's photos and possessions if they didn't get them all yet. Then top it off with NY's best cheesecake.
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:04:13 PM EDT
[#17]
I'm in a similar situation and I'll tell you what I'm going to do.
Sister #2 can fuck off. Sister #1 is she doesn't start to make things right I'm gonna tell her she gets the same as the other one. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:04:32 PM EDT
[#18]
I left out one detail. When Mom had house for sale step sister contacted me asking if they were getting their half when the house sold. W T F? She is not dead.
Me, Mom and step sister all called my Mom's estate attorney separately. He told us each the same, step siblings have no claim to anything. When one spouse dies the other owns it and can do what every they want, including changing the will. Especially when married and worked for 25 years at near same wage. Oh, step Dad had a 1911 and a 380 that I gave to step sisters adult sons since it was their grandfathers. Thanks for all the replies, I didn't think anyone would read that wall of text. Mostly I wanted to vent. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:04:36 PM EDT
[#19]
Sounds like a great time to move west and start a new life.
Like fishing? Move to Oregon or Washington, no state income tax in WA. Learn to kill Salmon! |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:05:57 PM EDT
[#20]
5K a piece and you keep the rest. Tell them that it costs money to care for the parents and be happy with what you got.
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:07:43 PM EDT
[#21]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Fuck them. Tell em to piss off. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:08:04 PM EDT
[#22]
they deserve nothing
ZERO |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:10:09 PM EDT
[#23]
I am sorry for your loss.
0 - including 0 paperwork. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:10:58 PM EDT
[#24]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I'd speak to an estate attorney and stop speaking to the step-siblings. IANAL. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:11:10 PM EDT
[#25]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
You're a fool if you give them one red cent. Your step-father's wishes were made before he needed 10 years of care that your step-siblings completely ignored. I would honor your mother's wishes and stop talking to your step-siblings. Start a 529 plan for your kid's education. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:12:17 PM EDT
[#26]
Throwing the principal of your mothers wishes aside, are you well off already? Are the step siblings struggling to support 8 starving children? Would they spend it on drugs?
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:13:53 PM EDT
[#27]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
you will end up in court. 100% guaranteed. it will be ugly. Get ahead of it now with your attorney. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:14:40 PM EDT
[#28]
I am not a lawyer. I have been through something similar twice.
Get yourself in front of the lawyer who drew the will as soon as you can. The first will _should_ have specified what happens LEGALLY when one spouse passes before the other and what LEGALLY had to be dispersed and to whom. IF it said (loosely) all to my wife, then she had total say over what was to be done. IF the will specified 1/2 to wife & 1/2 to kids, the executor had a responsibility to see that was carried out. There _should not_ have been a joint will. It is my understanding wills are written for individual persons. This will be going to court before a probate judge for sure. YOU or your lawyer should also have a copy of step dad's will with you at that time. As stated above, this could get ugly and time consuming. Contested estates are what buys the expensive toys for lawyers. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:15:22 PM EDT
[#29]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Your duty as executor is to do your best to honor the wishes of the departed. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:18:05 PM EDT
[#30]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Your step dad wanted your mom to have the money. She then willed it to you. She gave up HER life for him. Fuck them, take the money and ignore them. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:20:47 PM EDT
[#31]
Next time your step sister starts pestering you for a handout I would send them a copy of the will. Then, because I'm a nice guy I would have a legal agreement drawn up giving them a combined 33.3% of the inheritance (16.6% each) on the condition that they do not contest it and do not contact you anymore.
They don't sound like they deserve it but still they should have something from their father. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:20:54 PM EDT
[#32]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
This. For all you know, the will could have an error and be unenforceable. If that were the case, you might be better off giving them half then having the court split it 33/33/33. IANAL. Only $25K was distributed by estate attorney and that has already happened. I don't think I have any legal issues. Estate attorney sent be closing statement wanting paid. Estate attorney went to school with my Mom. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:21:32 PM EDT
[#33]
Fuck those clowns, lawyer up. Its funny to see the scum ooze out from death, sad really.
Yoo-hoo, I'll make ya famous |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:22:58 PM EDT
[#34]
Sorry for your loses, bro.
As to what your parents left to you...it's yours. They changed their will(s) to reflect how the shitbags were treating them when they needed their help. Tell those asshats that the Will was changed and they are going to get exactly what your parents felt they deserved...squat. Tell them the Probate will be put of public record once it's finished. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:23:15 PM EDT
[#35]
Keep all the money and use the portion you consider giving to them to cover lawyer fees as they surely would sue you either way.
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:23:23 PM EDT
[#36]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I left out one detail. When Mom had house for sale step sister contacted me asking if they were getting their half when the house sold. W T F? She is not dead. Me, Mom and step sister all called my Mom's estate attorney separately. He told us each the same, step siblings have no claim to anything. When one spouse dies the other owns it and can do what every they want, including changing the will. Especially when married and worked for 25 years at near same wage. Oh, step Dad had a 1911 and a 380 that I gave to step sisters adult sons since it was their grandfathers. Thanks for all the replies, I didn't think anyone would read that wall of text. Mostly I wanted to vent. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:25:19 PM EDT
[#37]
Nothing!
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:25:28 PM EDT
[#38]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Next time your step sister starts pestering you for a handout I would send them a copy of the will. Then, because I'm a nice guy I would have a legal agreement drawn up giving them a combined 33.3% of the inheritance (16.6% each) on the condition that they do not contest it and do not contact you anymore. They don't sound like they deserve it but still they should have something from their father. I planned to give them a little more than that but now she wants to see statements makes me think they will never be happy. They probably think there was way more money. My Moms 6 months in dementia unit burned some cash and their house was only 2/3 paid for. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:27:10 PM EDT
[#39]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Sorry for your loses, bro. As to what your parents left to you...it's yours. They changed their will(s) to reflect how the shitbags were treating them when they needed their help. Tell those asshats that the Will was changed and they are going to get exactly what your parents felt they deserved...squat. Tell them the Probate will be put of public record once it's finished. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:27:30 PM EDT
[#40]
I actually can't believe what a pushover everyone is. I would give them -25k each. you don't owe anything but they owe YOU for missing support. if anything, tell them your mom needed financial help and left them debt which you would really like them to repay. every time they contact you for money, turn the tables and tell them you really need the money. you have the number in the wrong direction, it's supposed to be negative. I have no idea why you think 0 is acceptable either. in my opinion, 25k is just for average, if they made more they should be paying more because there would even less excuse to not help.
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:29:46 PM EDT
[#41]
Is your stepsister hot? If so tell her I'm rich as fuck, I'll fix her greedy ass the 'ol Irish way.
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:31:00 PM EDT
[#42]
I just don't understand your desire to go against your mom's will for jerks who weren't there when they were needed? Where is this coming from?
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:31:13 PM EDT
[#43]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I am not a lawyer. I have been through something similar twice. Get yourself in front of the lawyer who drew the will as soon as you can. The first will _should_ have specified what happens LEGALLY when one spouse passes before the other and what LEGALLY had to be dispersed and to whom. IF it said (loosely) all to my wife, then she had total say over what was to be done. IF the will specified 1/2 to wife & 1/2 to kids, the executor had a responsibility to see that was carried out. There _should not_ have been a joint will. It is my understanding wills are written for individual persons. This will be going to court before a probate judge for sure. YOU or your lawyer should also have a copy of step dad's will with you at that time. As stated above, this could get ugly and time consuming. Contested estates are what buys the expensive toys for lawyers. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:31:41 PM EDT
[#44]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Keep all the money and use the portion you consider giving to them to cover lawyer fees as they surely would sue you either way. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:32:10 PM EDT
[#45]
You need to talk to a TAX LAWYER before giving away any money!
I voted '0', but they will probably try to sue you for their share so offer them whatever the tax lawyer says you can give without either party getting hit with a large tax. 
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:32:49 PM EDT
[#46]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Is your stepsister hot? If so tell her I'm rich as fuck, I'll fix her greedy ass the 'ol Irish way. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:33:34 PM EDT
[#47]
Fuck em and get a lawyer on retainer in case they pull any shenanigans
fuck em |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:33:37 PM EDT
[#48]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I just don't understand your desire to go against your mom's will for jerks who weren't there when they were needed? Where is this coming from? Edit, being nice is a good thing, being foolish is not, but maybe being a little of both is decent. I don't know if this is a "being the better person" scenario. Protect yourself, and don't give in to the bad parts of humanity I guess. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:34:44 PM EDT
[#49]
You could give them money which they will squander on hookers and blown and may end up dead.
Second thought that dosent sound so horrible. |
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Posted: 8/22/2017 8:36:28 PM EDT
[#50]
And consider paying them anything could be articulated that you owe them on the amount they claim.
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