be two steps ahead of security.  if they want you to have your laptop out and in a separate bin, and have your shoes off, have this done at least two or three people ahead of you in line, so you can just drop your shit and pass through.  don't be That Guy who holds the whole line up because he did nothing to prepare to pass through beforehand.

Incidentally, sometimes really strange stuff happens on planes, like engines falling off.  The aircraft can endure a hell of a lot more than the meat inside it can, so if you're still alive, and the stewardesses aren't praying, you're almost certainly fine.

Quoted: be two steps ahead of security.  if they want you to have your laptop out and in a separate bin, and have your shoes off, have this done at least two or three people ahead of you in line, so you can just drop your shit and pass through.  don't be That Guy who holds the whole line up because he did nothing to prepare to pass through beforehand.

Good advice, thanks.

I've no idea what security will entail at MCI.  I do understand that our airport is crappy.  I think SuperSixOne outlined it earlier but I understand that there is NOTHING beyond security here.  No bathrooms, no shops, no restaurants, NOTHING.  That's probably gonna be the worst part to me.

Take a CD or MP3 player.  Pack minimally, prepare for bullshit at the terminal.  Once you're airborne your gtg.

Get a window seat, leave the window shade up, and enjoy the view.



If it suddenly looks like this, close the shade...

Quoted: Take something to read or an iPod to listen to on the plane. Wear comfortable clothes (that is shorts, a golf shirt and slip-off shoes for me). You will have to take your shoes off to go through security so keep that in mind. Buy something to drink to take on the plane, like bottled water or a Coke. It might be more than an hour before you get service on the plane (if at all). I generally eat some frozen yogurt when I get to the airport (but I don't take 6:45 AM flights either). The frozen yogurt will help you keep from getting hungry and will keep you cool on the plane. If you take any medicine, make sure to keep that with you. Remember that baggage you check could be lost in the system for 24 or more hours. So, take a small carry on bag with the essentials you might need. Good luck.

Do not bring any food or drink items with you to the airport, they are no longer allowed on the plane...

Any food/drink you bring must be bought from airport consessions, AFTER you clear security...

P.S. Unless you're 5'4", definately try and get an aisle seat.... So you can stick your legs out into the aisle....

How the hell do you make it to 20 without at least ONE plane trip, anyway?

If you like flying, take a 1hr 'discovery' flight in a Cessna at your local airport... More legroom (in the pilot's seat, anyway) and you actually get to see the 'view' through something bigger than an 8" porthole....

Quoted: Quoted: be two steps ahead of security.  if they want you to have your laptop out and in a separate bin, and have your shoes off, have this done at least two or three people ahead of you in line, so you can just drop your shit and pass through.  don't be That Guy who holds the whole line up because he did nothing to prepare to pass through beforehand. Good advice, thanks. I've no idea what security will entail at MCI.  I do understand that our airport is crappy.  I think SuperSixOne outlined it earlier but I understand that there is NOTHING beyond security here.  No bathrooms, no shops, no restaurants, NOTHING.  That's probably gonna be the worst part to me.

Depending on the security area you are in you might have these overpriced snack bar/vending machine things. But I don't recommend drinking anything while you sit there, it will only make you want to piss which you can't do in the security area's at MCI.

I noticed your in OP, I'm in Olathe, howdy neighbor.

IM sent.

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: Drive, it's less than 600 miles. 612.9 miles from my door in OP. My girlfriend's car (the one we'd take were we to drive) gets 26 miles per gallon highway. It would take 23.5 gallons of gas to get to Denver at 26 miles per gallon. At $4.16/gallon it would cost $97.76 to get to Denver one way. Round trip costs bring it to $192.52 just in gas. My time is currently valued by Target at $9.75/hr.  I'd be driving for 9 hours to get to Denver. That's another $87.75. Trip total would be $280.27.  Our combined round-trip airfare was $298.  I'll pay the extra $18 for the ease of getting to Denver in 1.5 hours Add the commute time to the airport, the check in time, the wait time at the gate, then waiting on your bags at the other end, getting a rental car, driving out of the airport property, and driving to your principal destination.  Let's call it 5.5 hours in round numbers. After TSA humiliates you and makes you walk across the crappy floor in your socks, the drive will look pretty good.

don't forget the lost/stolen luggage
I decided years ago that if I can get there in 2 days of driving and have the time to spare I will not fly ever again
I remember as a kid when they gave you actual food
now you get half a can a pop if you're lucky

i also forgot....


get a seat near the wing window.  observe how much flex the wings endure .....its awsome...

It's true, there are no snacks inside security at MCI but if they stop at a gas station, you can always run in and pick up some beef jerky and a hot dog.



Edit for funnier pic

Quoted: It's true, there are no snacks inside security at MCI but if they stop at a gas station, you can always run in and pick up some beef jerky and a hot dog.

As of the beginning of this month, they won't let that thru security...

Quoted: Quoted: It's true, there are no snacks inside security at MCI but if they stop at a gas station, you can always run in and pick up some beef jerky and a hot dog. As of the beginning of this month, they won't let that thru security...

I was referring to the Southwest flight that rolled up in front of a gas station in Burbank years ago

But yeah, I go through security 12-15 times a month and have no idea what the food/drink/fluids regs are. Crewmembers are exempt from some of the rules. Hopefully the new Crewpass system will allow us to bypass security completely.

Seriously, no food through security?

Quoted: You are in boarding group A?  Try to get the emergency exit row seats for the extra leg room.

Side benefit: Able to get out quickly if necessary.

Quoted: Get a window seat, leave the window shade up, and enjoy the view. i93.photobucket.com/albums/l44/VACaver/rightsideup.jpg If it suddenly looks like this, close the shade... i93.photobucket.com/albums/l44/VACaver/upsidedown.jpg

It's really not as bad as some people make it out to be. For your carry-on bag, check it carefully if you use it for other things in your day-to-day life - you don't want security to find some knife or tool or ammo or something in there that you forgot about. I always check a bag, mostly so I can get all of my toiletries through with no hassle. I've never had any problems with late or missing luggage, but I wouldn't check anything expensive - electronics, jewelery, etc. Just clothes, toiletries, and any tools, knives, guns, etc that you can't take through security.

You probably want to get to the airport an hour or two before the flight leaves, it depends on how large and busy the airport is at that time. I'd probably give it 2 hours if it's your first flight, you can adjust for later flights depending on your experience. If you have your boarding pass already and aren't checking bags, then you can go straight to security when you get to the airport, otherwise, you'll have to go to the check-in desk for your airline. For a fast trip through security, while you're waiting in line, take everything that might set off a metal detector out of your pockets and put it inside your bag - that way you don't have to fiddle with taking it all out and gathering it back up at the conveyor belt for the scanner. Keep in mind that you'll have to take off your shoes too. Keep your driver's license and boarding pass handy too, since they'll need to see it. And it shouldn't need to be said, but since this is ARFCOM, don't take up your beefs with the stupidity of the security procedure with the security guys, because they don't control any of it.

I guess you're flying Southwest. A boarding group means that you are one of the first people on the plane. I actually like the later boarding better, because you can choose who you're sitting around - fat people, kids, and babies = bad; skinny people and pretty girls = good. But with A, you can at least have your choice of window or aisle and which end of the plane. I recommend a book or magazine in addition to any electronics, since they'll make you turn off electronics for the first and last 20 minutes or so of the flight. The other guy's bathroom tips are good too - piss early and often, so you don't get stuck holding it while you aren't allowed to leave the seat.

Quoted: Don't bring fire. You can't take it on the plane.

I have heard this, but as a smoker I almost always have multiple lighters and/or matches in my carry on bag, and have never had any problems.

Quoted: Quoted: It's true, there are no snacks inside security at MCI but if they stop at a gas station, you can always run in and pick up some beef jerky and a hot dog. As of the beginning of this month, they won't let that thru security...

Allah Snackbar!!!!

Heres a tip: Enjoy it.

Quoted: Heres a tip: Enjoy it.

Yeah, ENJOY the flight, DON'T worry about anything inflight
(because you CAN'T do anything about any of those problems)

Quoted: Quoted: Ativan What is Ativan?

Its great stuff, its what I use to fly.

oops, i forgot to include the "mile high" club pic. but i meant to include it *here*

that being said.....

son of a bitch....the only time i had the opportunity mother nature said no.    

i had to settle for the half mile club which was a hand job in business class.  

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: be two steps ahead of security.  if they want you to have your laptop out and in a separate bin, and have your shoes off, have this done at least two or three people ahead of you in line, so you can just drop your shit and pass through.  don't be That Guy who holds the whole line up because he did nothing to prepare to pass through beforehand. Good advice, thanks. I've no idea what security will entail at MCI.  I do understand that our airport is crappy.  I think SuperSixOne outlined it earlier but I understand that there is NOTHING beyond security here.  No bathrooms, no shops, no restaurants, NOTHING.  That's probably gonna be the worst part to me. Depending on the security area you are in you might have these overpriced snack bar/vending machine things. But I don't recommend drinking anything while you sit there, it will only make you want to piss which you can't do in the security area's at MCI. I noticed your in OP, I'm in Olathe, howdy neighbor.

Howdy ho!  Where do you go shooting at?

Everyone else - Thanks for the tips.  I'm gonna run it on benadryl and hope I can sleep my ass off through the flight.

Quoted: At MCI you won't have a drink until you get one the plane, their are no concessions/stores or bathrooms beyond security. Btw the proper term is not KCI, I don't know why people in KC use it, it's ICAO is KMCI or just MCI for short.

Not sure about Southwest, but there were concessions (including beer) and bathrooms beyond security at the United gate last week.  

As far as tips, if at all possible, do not check bags.  Bring a smaller suitcase and store it in the overhead bin. You'll end up saving at least a half hour both ways and your luggage will get there for sure.  The only complication is you have to have 3oz containers for all your products in a clear zip lock to go through security.  Hopefully not an issue for you, but probably for the woman.  

Also:  

- check in and print your boarding pass before you get to the airport.  I believe southwest assigns boarding priority in the order you check in, so get on it.

- don't wear a lot of metal: lose the belt buckle, etc.  keep your keys, cell, change in your carry-on, not your pocket.

Quoted: I'm gonna run it on benadryl and hope I can sleep my ass off through the flight.

You'll miss a beautiful view from the sky

Quoted: Seriously, no food through security?

Signs posted at SeaTac, Minneapolis, and Milwaukee..

No food or drink through security, but items purchased in the 'secure' area of the airport may be taken onboard flights....

I can see why... It would not be terribly hard to make some sort of 'device' that looked like food, and get it bast the 'geniuses' that let me (accidentally) bring an empty M-9 magazine on a plane....

Quoted: Security isnt as bad as most people here tend to claim. Just be prepared and be organized.

This varies greatly by airport.

Wear shoes that are easy to take off in case you need to for security.

I always go for an aisle seat as far forward as I can get. I hate waiting a long time to get off the plane once we've landed.

Drink water instead of anything with caffine.

If flying on Southwest, avoid making eye contact with the "male" flight attendants.

The whole key to flying is to throw yourself at the ground and miss.



Oh, wrong flying. Never mind.

Quoted: The whole key to flying is to throw yourself at the ground and miss. Oh, wrong flying. Never mind.

Thanks for all the fish

Quoted: Quoted: Seriously, no food through security? Signs posted at SeaTac, Minneapolis, and Milwaukee.. No food or drink through security, but items purchased in the 'secure' area of the airport may be taken onboard flights.... I can see why... It would not be terribly hard to make some sort of 'device' that looked like food, and get it bast the 'geniuses' that let me (accidentally) bring an empty M-9 magazine on a plane....

You CAN however bring empty plastic water bottles and fill them off the water fountian once you are through security avaoing paying $47 for a bottle of water.

Quoted: Quoted: The whole key to flying is to throw yourself at the ground and miss. Oh, wrong flying. Never mind. Thanks for all the fish

Remember to bring a towel as they are massively useful.

We have arrived!  Flying was cool as hell.  Takeoff was fun, landing was fun, sleeping was not.

Quoted: We have arrived!  Flying was cool as hell.  Takeoff was fun, landing was fun, sleeping was not.

give us your "first timer" impression of security

Quoted: Quoted: At MCI you won't have a drink until you get one the plane, their are no concessions/stores or bathrooms beyond security. Btw the proper term is not KCI, I don't know why people in KC use it, it's ICAO is KMCI or just MCI for short. Not sure about Southwest, but there were concessions (including beer) and bathrooms beyond security at the United gate last week.   As far as tips, if at all possible, do not check bags.  Bring a smaller suitcase and store it in the overhead bin. You'll end up saving at least a half hour both ways and your luggage will get there for sure.  The only complication is you have to have 3oz containers for all your products in a clear zip lock to go through security.  Hopefully not an issue for you, but probably for the woman.   Also:   - check in and print your boarding pass before you get to the airport.  I believe southwest assigns boarding priority in the order you check in, so get on it. - don't wear a lot of metal: lose the belt buckle, etc.  keep your keys, cell, change in your carry-on, not your pocket.

I was at MCI 2 weeks ago and there are concession stands beyond security. You just have to go looking for them.

Quoted: Quoted: Window seat. nah, aisle seat, so you can run to the can if you have to.

If you can't hold it for a flight from KC to Denver, you need to turn in your man card.

Quoted: Incidentally, sometimes really strange stuff happens on planes, like engines falling off.  The aircraft can endure a hell of a lot more than the meat inside it can, so if you're still alive, and the stewardesses aren't praying, you're almost certainly fine.

Don't worry if one engine falls off. The plane is perfectly capable of taking you all the way to the scene of the crash on just one engine. Hell I bet you will beat the paramedics there by at least half an hour.

Quoted: Also, go to the bathroom before you board.  That goes for the woman, too.  Airplane lavatories work okay, but it's a pain in the ass, and you have to remain in your seat for the first and last half hour or so of the flight.  That's not idle advice, either.  You don't want to realize you're about to burst just as they start pulling away from the jetway.  (If you do, remember that the puke bag in the seat pocket is waterproof)

A month ago, I was on a short one-hour flight from Houston to Dallas and they declared the lavatory non-operable and advised passengers to go once last time before boarding. This guy is fortunate he wasn't arrested because others have been:
Man Relieves Himself in Air Sickness Bag During Plane Flight
Friday, March 16, 2007
Associated Press

SALT LAKE CITY - SkyWest Airlines apologized to a passenger who said he wasn't allowed to use the restroom during a one-hour flight and ended up urinating in an air-sickness bag after two "really big beers."

James Whipple was on a flight to Salt Lake City from Boise, Idaho, on March 7 and wanted to use the cabin restroom. The captain, however, had declared it off-limits during the short flight because a light wasn't working.

Whipple said he had two "really big beers" in the Boise airport. He used the cabin restroom before the plane departed but had to go again and finally reached for the air-sickness bag.

"It was like I had no choice," Whipple told The Salt Lake Tribune, which posted the story on its Web site Friday.

No other passengers noticed Whipple using the bag, but a flight attendant asked him about it and told the captain, who called airport police. Whipple was questioned and took a taxi home to Sandy, a Salt Lake City suburb.

The airline sent him a letter of apology and a flight voucher, SkyWest spokeswoman Sabrena Suite-Mangum said Friday.

She said SkyWest decided to go ahead with the flight and get the light fixed in Salt Lake City, rather than delaying it or canceling it for repairs.

"For such a short flight, we really felt we were trying to inconvenience the least number of passengers possible by operating that flight," Suite-Mangum said.

Quoted: You are in boarding group A?  Try to get the emergency exit row seats for the extra leg room.

Big +1 on that one!

Quoted: Quoted: Don't bring fire. You can't take it on the plane. I have heard this, but as a smoker I almost always have multiple lighters and/or matches in my carry on bag, and have never had any problems.

No, no, no....that's fine, you are new.

You can't take fire on the plane111one!

It's one of the *things* people in GD do, like tonk, or SIIHP&PP, or geese.

As soon as you leave the runway and you feel the plane climbing, You shout " Allah Akbar" about three times. Don't worry this is a new tradition, so not too many people are on page with it. But the passengers will enjoy this.

So overall it went well?

Quoted: Quoted: We have arrived!  Flying was cool as hell.  Takeoff was fun, landing was fun, sleeping was not. give us your "first timer" impression of security

Lackluster at best.  I wasn't impressed at all to be honest.

Deej - Yeah it went really well.  Except for the kid kicking my seat while I tried to sleep.

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: We have arrived!  Flying was cool as hell.  Takeoff was fun, landing was fun, sleeping was not. give us your "first timer" impression of security Lackluster at best.  I wasn't impressed at all to be honest. Deej - Yeah it went really well.  Except for the kid kicking my seat while I tried to sleep.

Cool, so you got the VIP treatment.  If you sit between two fat guys on the next flight, with a baby screaming in the seat in front of you, you'll be a veteran.

Are you glad you slept?  I've been flying for 20+ years and I still get a kick out of the view.

Quoted: Are you glad you slept?  I've been flying for 20+ years and I still get a kick out of the view.

I only wanted to sleep because I wasn't sure how I'd react to the whole flying thing.  Once I kicked myself in the ass and took a chunk out of my mancard I realized it just wasn't that bad.  I can't wait to see the view on the way home Wednesday morning.  We should leave right around sunrise so the view should be awesome.

Quoted: Are you glad you slept?  I've been flying for 20+ years and I still get a kick out of the view.

+1

Sometimes I'll look at google earth if I don't get to fly soon.

Quoted: Quoted: Are you glad you slept?  I've been flying for 20+ years and I still get a kick out of the view. I only wanted to sleep because I wasn't sure how I'd react to the whole flying thing.  Once I kicked myself in the ass and took a chunk out of my mancard I realized it just wasn't that bad.  I can't wait to see the view on the way home Wednesday morning.  We should leave right around sunrise so the view should be awesome.

It should be great!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYTOzbRBphw

William Shatner in the Twilight Zone

Nightmare at 20,000 feet