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Go back to your basement and stay there. Do not venture out again into the real world, with scary stuff like real wimmenz. |
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No advice from me.
YOU need to figure out things for yourself, as to what's IMPORTANT to YOU. And, how YOU want to live. Aloha, Mark |
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I was married for a while and it was absolutely wonderful sharing life with my best friend, until it wasn't wonderful anymore. Marriage taught me that you can have absolute trust in no one. View Quote People change. Sometimes the person you marry isn't the person you wind up married to. Be careful. It's all a gamble. Nothing ventured; nothing gained. |
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Live your life. Learn to like yourself. Be kind to others. And if you wind up with a wife in the process then so be it. If you don't, then don't make yourself miserable trying to be something you're not. I was 35 when I married. Up until that point I was living the single life like a real pro. Some folks define themselves by the sexual relationship they are in or are not in. Step out of the heterocage and just be you for a while.
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Just live life and don't over think it.
Being single is fine I see nothing wrong with it. That being said, I can't imagine living life without my wife. We have been together for 17+ years no kids and don't plan on it. We are a good team, and she helps make my life way easier and enjoyable. My best friend is the same age as me and he has always been single. His to do list is never ending. I can't imagine having to do everything all the time, splitting chores/bills/ and life 50/50 with somebody you care about makes life all the more enjoyable IMHO, but to each his own. |
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Perfection isn't expected. However, you've been saying for months that you're looking for a serious relationship with a good girl, yet in that exact same time period you've also been frequently boasting about your "hit it and quit it" habits. There hasn't been one iota of demonstrable change in the tenor of your posts at all. [serioushat] If you are actually earnest about finding a decent girl, you need to quit that shit. That sort of behavior is something that good girls avoid like the plague. In the eyes of a good girl, you are damaged goods. Until you fix that, you won't likely find a good girl that wants anything to do with you. You state that you look decent and have a good job; great! But you have some serious moral/ethical baggage you're toting around, and that is a huge red flag to most good girls. [/serioushat] View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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36 and single. Wish I had a wife, kids, etc. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile What are your standards? I want the same thing but I'm also very picky. I'm no Brad Pitt, but I'm tall, in good shape, educated, have a good job. All the young women who haven't married seem to be waiting for a movie star to come along. The more I date, honestly, the more frustrated I get. I'm at the age now where hookups aren't my thing. I want a real relationship with a wonderful woman. Your plethora of threads and posts advocating a "hit it and quit it" lifestyle say otherwise. Hi Namaah. Well, I'm changing. Nor am I perfect. Perfection isn't expected. However, you've been saying for months that you're looking for a serious relationship with a good girl, yet in that exact same time period you've also been frequently boasting about your "hit it and quit it" habits. There hasn't been one iota of demonstrable change in the tenor of your posts at all. [serioushat] If you are actually earnest about finding a decent girl, you need to quit that shit. That sort of behavior is something that good girls avoid like the plague. In the eyes of a good girl, you are damaged goods. Until you fix that, you won't likely find a good girl that wants anything to do with you. You state that you look decent and have a good job; great! But you have some serious moral/ethical baggage you're toting around, and that is a huge red flag to most good girls. [/serioushat] I respect your advice, Namaah. The thing is I really don't even follow through with that kind of lifestyle. I can honestly say that my heart is changing and for the good. I'll be honest, when the love of my life at the time left a couple years ago, I became bitter and thus the "hit it and quit it" bs phase started. I'm ready for the next chapter of my life and at 38 I'm too young to stay in the same rut. |
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I have been married for 35 years and I can't imagine life without her.
I must have a rare wife, she lets me do about anything I want and buy anything I want within reason. I wouldn't have as many toys if I was single, she makes a good income and likes most of the hobbies I do. |
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Except that it's really not the truth for most. Older men that never marry usually confess that they are lonely, depressed, and less happy. I've seen it time and time again. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful princess, Will you marry me? The Princess said, NO! And the Prince lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and fucked skinny big titted broads and hunted and fished and raced cars. He went to nudie bars and dated women half his age and drank whiskey, beer and Captain Morgan and never heard bitching and never paid child support or alimony. He kept his house and guns and never got cheated on while he was at work and all his friends and family thought he was fucking cool as hell and he had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up ….. The end truth Except that it's really not the truth for most. Older men that never marry usually confess that they are lonely, depressed, and less happy. I've seen it time and time again. Its true for me. Couldnt see how adding children or a wife to my life would make it better. |
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Yeah until you realize you're the weird, old guy in the neighborhood. That's what I notice most about dudes that try to convince themselves and everyone else that being single is the best. I was one of those and thank god I'm not now. Those dudes really are weird. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful princess, Will you marry me? The Princess said, NO! And the Prince lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and fucked skinny big titted broads and hunted and fished and raced cars. He went to nudie bars and dated women half his age and drank whiskey, beer and Captain Morgan and never heard bitching and never paid child support or alimony. He kept his house and guns and never got cheated on while he was at work and all his friends and family thought he was fucking cool as hell and he had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up ….. The end truth Except that it's really not the truth for most. Older men that never marry usually confess that they are lonely, depressed, and less happy. I've seen it time and time again. I'll never say its for everyone. I have guy friends that couldnt wait to have a family. As a single guy for 99.9% of my life I can say it was the best. Yeah until you realize you're the weird, old guy in the neighborhood. That's what I notice most about dudes that try to convince themselves and everyone else that being single is the best. I was one of those and thank god I'm not now. Those dudes really are weird. Your still really weird. I live in the country so when I was family free no one noticed but now I regret missing out on being the creepy dude. |
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So Pro - Love Friendship like no other Sex Teamwork Income - though that can go both ways Kids Con Divorce - financial and emotional ruin potential Stress worrying about your partner income issues change of life styles In laws - though that can also go both ways Being alone sometimes really sucks - but being with someone you cant live with is even worse. For me I dated some in school and was on again off again with one gal who I ended up marrying at 25. Yes , all of my buddies got married about the same time , minus a couple of guys in the military , and the pressure from everyone is severe at that time. BTW , half of them divorced in their 40's and a few got divorced in less than 5 years. Well after 14 years together and two kids we just grew totally apart from one another. Yeah, we had fun and were like minded in many ways, but her road and my road were growing further and further apart until I said I was done. Now I love my kids to death and my youngest and I have always been best friends , but the emotional roller coaster, stress ,and the debt the ex left me in was staggering and I asked myself would I have changed things knowing what I do now. The answer was sometimes yes it was not worth it. So if you do make that step in life , try and choose wisely and always be prepared for the worst case situations because people do change. With that I got married again 4 months ago and it will be the last time I ever do this. |
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Just live life and don't over think it. Being single is fine I see nothing wrong with it. That being said, I can't imagine living life without my wife. We have been together for 17+ years no kids and don't plan on it. We are a good team, and she helps make my life way easier and enjoyable. My best friend is the same age as me and he has always been single. His to do list is never ending. I can't imagine having to do everything all the time, splitting chores/bills/ and life 50/50 with somebody you care about makes life all the more enjoyable IMHO, but to each his own. View Quote Unless his "to do list" means hookers and blow your single friend is not managing his time very well. My married friends with children are always busy, busy, busy, frantically burning the candle on both ends while I fuck off and relax in my free time doing what I want. All those cool things men invented over the years to make the wifes housework quicker and easier also benefits us bachelors. |
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Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful princess, Will you marry me? The Princess said, NO! And the Prince lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and fucked skinny big titted broads and hunted and fished and raced cars. He went to nudie bars and dated women half his age and drank whiskey, beer and Captain Morgan and never heard bitching and never paid child support or alimony. He kept his house and guns and never got cheated on while he was at work and all his friends and family thought he was fucking cool as hell and he had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up ….. The end View Quote I was going to post pretty much this.....but this is funnier than what I was going to say. If being married makes you a better person, then work on yourself. You should be a complete and whole person, unaffected by the relationship you are or are not in. Secondly, if you truly love another person, why do you need to sign a contract to prove it? I love my mother and father and I am completely loyal to them ....I didnt have to sign a contract to prove it. I know married guys that cheat on the wives all the time. I know guys that have girlfriends that they are completely committed to. A legal contract is nothing more than that. It does not solidify a relationship. If it does, your relationship is sad. |
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Except that it's really not the truth for most. Older men that never marry usually confess that they are lonely, depressed, and less happy. I've seen it time and time again. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful princess, Will you marry me? The Princess said, NO! And the Prince lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and fucked skinny big titted broads and hunted and fished and raced cars. He went to nudie bars and dated women half his age and drank whiskey, beer and Captain Morgan and never heard bitching and never paid child support or alimony. He kept his house and guns and never got cheated on while he was at work and all his friends and family thought he was fucking cool as hell and he had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up ….. The end truth Except that it's really not the truth for most. Older men that never marry usually confess that they are lonely, depressed, and less happy. I've seen it time and time again. Not being married does not have to be synonymous to being alone. Being married is no guarantee against being lonely. Some of the most miserable, depressed and lonely people I know are married....both men and women. |
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I think you very adequately stated the pros and cons, at least as I see it. I remember a friend of mine giving me shit because back a decade ago, I always had credit card debt -nothing crazy, but it was always near impossible for me to get paid off. He had met his wife in college, and she made more money than he and I did. I was living alone at the time. I'd always retort "yeah, try having your car note, rent and all your other bills without a second income!" That always shut him up. My career has advanced, and my income is now very comfortable for me. I can pay my mortgage and car note, and all my bills and have some money left over. I can save/invest, and I can afford some toys and some fun. The cons of single life don't weigh on me as much, because I'm very introverted and very independent. Introverted doesn't mean "shy" or "socially awkward". I'm not shy, and can engage in conversation with strangers... I just don't like doing it. I often times prefer being alone. Introverts tend to "lose energy" when interacting with others, especially in menial ways like small talk and mingling. We're better at deeper connections and deeper communication. We "charge our batteries" when we're alone. So being single means I have no demands on my time. I am not forced to spend time with someone else, that may end up being draining to me. But I also don't have companionship. I don't have intimacy. At the same time, I don't have a strong need for either, really. I do regret that I missed an opportunity with a young lady I know. She was sweet, and mature and liked me plenty. I didn't take it seriously, and she ended up getting with another guy, got knocked up and they got married. They're happily still together years later. (and MAN did she grow some huge tits after that kid!! hahahaha) Now I'm 38 years old and single. The options out there don't often appeal to me. I can't relate to women that have kids and/or are divorced, because I've never been married and I don't have any kids. It seems that women who are attractive, don't have kids and are single closer to my age are the kind that are holding out for some cosmic event to drop their Mr. Perfect on them, and will not settle for less. And me, I ain't got no time fo' dat! View Quote Your posts always reads well and come across like a wise old sage. Funny for 38 years old. |
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I was going to post pretty much this.....but this is funnier than what I was going to say. If being married makes you a better person, then work on yourself. You should be a complete and whole person, unaffected by the relationship you are or are not in. Secondly, if you truly love another person, why do you need to sign a contract to prove it? I love my mother and father and I am completely loyal to them ....I didnt have to sign a contract to prove it. I know married guys that cheat on the wives all the time. I know guys that have girlfriends that they are completely committed to. A legal contract is nothing more than that. It does not solidify a relationship. If it does, your relationship is sad. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful princess, Will you marry me? The Princess said, NO! And the Prince lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and fucked skinny big titted broads and hunted and fished and raced cars. He went to nudie bars and dated women half his age and drank whiskey, beer and Captain Morgan and never heard bitching and never paid child support or alimony. He kept his house and guns and never got cheated on while he was at work and all his friends and family thought he was fucking cool as hell and he had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up ….. The end I was going to post pretty much this.....but this is funnier than what I was going to say. If being married makes you a better person, then work on yourself. You should be a complete and whole person, unaffected by the relationship you are or are not in. Secondly, if you truly love another person, why do you need to sign a contract to prove it? I love my mother and father and I am completely loyal to them ....I didnt have to sign a contract to prove it. I know married guys that cheat on the wives all the time. I know guys that have girlfriends that they are completely committed to. A legal contract is nothing more than that. It does not solidify a relationship. If it does, your relationship is sad. I can see getting married for religious reasons, making the vows to each other in front of God and witnesses. Especially if you are going to bring babies into this world. Yeah, a ring won't plug her hole but it may make her less likely to cheat than a shack up who has no skin in the game. The state should have no part of marriage though since it actually benefits from no fault divorce and child support as a cash cow and an excuse to expand public programs. |
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Would you rather spend the remainder of your life lonely or annoyed?
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I spent the first half of my 30's looking for a mate, building a family, having kids, etc. I spent the second half of my 30's in a bitter custody fight, divorce, spent every single dime I had just to gain 50/50 custody. I've had 4 false protective orders filed against me, countless court appearances over 5 years, filing papers non-stop, finances are a wreck. Pay almost 1500 / month in what they call "child support" and alimony and the ex uses these funds to pay her lawyer to attack me and gain full custody. It has been the single worst decision of my life. In fact, it has the potential to wreck your life more than any other common event. You are holding a grenade in your hands that has a 50% chance of going off. You may think you are smart and are the "other" 50% that don't blow up but truth is, you never know. Especially if you meet a gifted sociopath who plays a manipulation game and you only find out way too late. I hate the family court, my state, the divorce industry and the average woman in my age bracket. It's just an extortion racket where they hold a "gun" to your head in the form of "We will take 'custody' away unless you pay us everything you have and go deeply into debt". The divorce court is pure mafia. View Quote Sorry to hear. I hope things are better now. This is the kinda shit that makes you want to hire a hitman. |
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47 y/o, single...My younger years were pretty much all about me and my own self interests (traveling, doing a bunch of other stuff). I dated a few different women when I was younger and i had one serious relationship that lasted about two years...thought I'd marry that one, but in the end she turned out to be a major alcoholic that was in recovery mode when I met her. She went back to drinking, and obviously things did not work out after that.
Than after that ended I got wrapped into taking care of my elderly parents. My choice. I knew they weren't going to be around forever and I wanted to make the most of their last few years here on Earth.. My honest answer to the OPs question now is that I have mixed feelings about the path I chose. On the one hand I still like being able to do my own thing when I want, but on the other hand, it does get lonely. I'd love to meet someone to spend time with, but I have criteria that has to be met. They need to make at least half of what I make financially, be as physically fit if not more fit than myself, non-drinker (for the most part), non-smoker, and not have kids (no interest in someone else's rugrat, sorry). |
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I lived my life one way up until the cusp of my late thirties, then it all got turned on it's head. I terrifiedly seized this new opportunity. It is what it is.
It's easy to stay single in this life full of distractions. I can't imagine a life where my daughter doesn't exist, though. Not now. Things change. Stay open to change. Do different things. Try new things. Be happy. Flow with the changes. |
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I wouldn't op. Been there, almost got married for the wrong reasons. Nothing wrong with being single.
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For me if the right girl comes along then maybe i'll get married. But I'm not going to marry the wrong women and be miserable either. I'd rather be single than with the wrong woman. The way I see it is be your best self and maybe you'll attract a good woman. So hit the gym, move forward in your career, and have fun with your friends.
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my dad told me that if you could dream of a life without someone, and it was a fulfilling life, then you shouldnt consider spending the rest of your life with them.
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You need to eject. You don't have strong feelings for her. You need to stop wasting her youth.
Marry, don't marry, but stop playing with a girl you're not in love with. |
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"Single", as in not married, I can understand. "Single", as in never having relationships, I do not understand (aside from time between relationships).
People who "choose" the latter, probably didn't have a choice to begin with, for one reason or another. |
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I got married young because that's what "normal people do". I was raised to be useful to society and the church.
I got away from some of that. My parents didn't consider running around sleeping with everyone and not putting down roots as a normal lifestyle. So, when I finished college I married my girlfriend. 22 years later it has worked out. But looking back, I realize that it isn't for everyone. Only get married if you have a burning desire to be with that woman forever. If you really love her. |
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"Single", as in not married, I can understand. "Single", as in never having relationships, I do not understand (aside from time between relationships). People who "choose" the latter, probably didn't have a choice to begin with, for one reason or another. View Quote sometimes the damage from a prior relationship makes a person want to avoid a deeper relationship with another person. im in that boat now. but ive also known folks that are just happier on their own. |
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"Single", as in not married, I can understand. "Single", as in never having relationships, I do not understand (aside from time between relationships). People who "choose" the latter, probably didn't have a choice to begin with, for one reason or another. View Quote In true arfcom fashion , i got both of your options I got married young. Had kids , i was on top of the world, i was the fucking man . I had a plan, it was working, i could see the payoff. Yeah..........not so much , her pkan changed to "as much dick as she could handle" My plan, my life was over. Over a period of years, i rebuilt . As the pain subsided, a new plan emerged. More years go by, and finally , the plan is working. Kids are grown and one is married and working her own plan doing well with it. Other is a senior in HS, doing good . Over the past coupke 3 years, i have " succeeded" w my plan so far. Things are looking up still. However, without knowing it , i took another piece of advice from arfcom. I worked my ass off, i had hobbies, i acquired currency and eschewed the ladies. I had a few dates, never more than a first date for years. Dated a girl for 2 years back in 06-08 , didnt work out. 2 years later i dated a half alkie really nic3 girk for a couple weeks. Thats it as far as women . And i still caution those who espouse the view to live your life how you want and work on yourself and the women will beat a path to your door. That is so far from the truth its not funny. It is a good way to spend your life alone. So if people want a woman you actually have to try. |
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I'm planning on living it for the time being.
Seem to have bad luck anyway, both (yes both) chicks I've dated ended up cheating on me, the first after we got engaged. The second...eh.. Not worth the effort or $$$ at the moment. Don't know any without the crazy and would rather spend the money to stock up. ammo and guns now, after the bans I can hunt for women |
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I’m curious to get some insight on the lifestyle of men who made the decision not to get married. Men who had serious relationships and maybe even a fiancé, yet chose to be single. Do you regret not having a wife, children, family? Do the pros outweigh the cons? Some quick background: I am almost 25 years old and feel I have my life together much more so than majority of my peers/age group. I never dated girls just to date. I only dated with the purpose to develop and grow the relationship. I have been dating a girl for almost two years and we get along very well. We both come from similar childhoods, families, education level, etc. We are at the stage where the following life events “should” take place over the next few years: her moving in, engagement, marriage, start a family. She is more on board and excited for these events to occur than I am. I believe she feels that way because a lot of our friends are taking that “socially accepted/expected” path. I am not against the idea, rather not as excited/ready as she is for it. I feel that I want to further develop my career, finances, travel experience, etc before I follow the “normal” path. Then I had a realization the other day. I realized that my life was much more stress free and relaxed when I am not in a relationship. That got me thinking… Is this reduced stress level and increased relaxation directly linked to being single? If so, is this feeling sustainable for a lifetime? I understand as life goes on and the more developed an individual becomes, mindset and beliefs can shift. I wonder if my feeling of perhaps the single life is the better choice for me is my short-term believe blinding my long-term belief of what is truly best for me? Here are some pros and cons that come to mind quickly. Of course, much more in depth analysis can/should be done and they are different to every person. Here are the main points: Pros: all your income is yours, spend/save/invest how you want, your schedule is in your control, you have the freedom to live/travel where/when you want, your career is in your control (relocating would be much more difficult with wife and kids) Cons: no combined income (assuming your wife works), obligations to her friends/family in terms of social gatherings/holidays, spontaneity is nowhere near what it could be because of wife/kids, not creating children, not raising/teaching your own children and watching them grow What advice would you give a 25 year old like myself? If you were in my shoes, what would be your plan? Feel free to post your thoughts and opinions. View Quote My advice is to live your life as you see fit and pay no heed to what people in GD think. Which group obviously includes me. |
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sometimes the damage from a prior relationship makes a person want to avoid a deeper relationship with another person. im in that boat now. but ive also known folks that are just happier on their own. View Quote I get that. But I'm assuming you haven't written relationships off entirely. Time to yourself after a shitty relationship is understandable and expected. I don't personally know anyone who is truly happier on their own. I know a few people who put on a show to make it seem that way, though. I'm not saying they aren't out there, but I think a lot of them have just given up. |
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Didn't meet my wife until I was 33.
Career, Corvette's, M3's,Chevelle Builds, travel...etc. Don't rush into anything, you're 25!!! Christ almighty, you just got out of college...live a little. Cowpunk |
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In true arfcom fashion , i got both of your options I got married young. Had kids , i was on top of the world, i was the fucking man . I had a plan, it was working, i could see the payoff. Yeah..........not so much , her pkan changed to "as much dick as she could handle" My plan, my life was over. Over a period of years, i rebuilt . As the pain subsided, a new plan emerged. More years go by, and finally , the plan is working. Kids are grown and one is married and working her own plan doing well with it. Other is a senior in HS, doing good . Over the past coupke 3 years, i have " succeeded" w my plan so far. Things are looking up still. However, without knowing it , i took another piece of advice from arfcom. I worked my ass off, i had hobbies, i acquired currency and eschewed the ladies. I had a few dates, never more than a first date for years. Dated a girl for 2 years back in 06-08 , didnt work out. 2 years later i dated a half alkie really nic3 girk for a couple weeks. Thats it as far as women . And i still caution those who espouse the view to live your life how you want and work on yourself and the women will beat a path to your door. That is so far from the truth its not funny. It is a good way to spend your life alone. So if people want a woman you actually have to try. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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"Single", as in not married, I can understand. "Single", as in never having relationships, I do not understand (aside from time between relationships). People who "choose" the latter, probably didn't have a choice to begin with, for one reason or another. In true arfcom fashion , i got both of your options I got married young. Had kids , i was on top of the world, i was the fucking man . I had a plan, it was working, i could see the payoff. Yeah..........not so much , her pkan changed to "as much dick as she could handle" My plan, my life was over. Over a period of years, i rebuilt . As the pain subsided, a new plan emerged. More years go by, and finally , the plan is working. Kids are grown and one is married and working her own plan doing well with it. Other is a senior in HS, doing good . Over the past coupke 3 years, i have " succeeded" w my plan so far. Things are looking up still. However, without knowing it , i took another piece of advice from arfcom. I worked my ass off, i had hobbies, i acquired currency and eschewed the ladies. I had a few dates, never more than a first date for years. Dated a girl for 2 years back in 06-08 , didnt work out. 2 years later i dated a half alkie really nic3 girk for a couple weeks. Thats it as far as women . And i still caution those who espouse the view to live your life how you want and work on yourself and the women will beat a path to your door. That is so far from the truth its not funny. It is a good way to spend your life alone. So if people want a woman you actually have to try. I assume you are not done with relationships entirely though, correct? I can understand having time for yourself. Everyone needs that. |
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I've been in love once in my life and it didn't work out. I've dated and met some very nice and interesting people, but just nobody that I'm interested in dating long term. I'm very content being single, despite the occasional bout with being lonely. Online dating is, quite frankly, horrible. Each day life brings some unexpected surprises. Perhaps I'll meet a great woman that makes me even better. But until that day comes, I will keep enjoying life's simple pleasures alone, with family, and friends. Being in a miserable relationship or doing it to "have someone around" is insanity.
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I get a kick out of these threads. It's seems there are tons of guys in my age range that don't know what to do... You can stomp your feet all you want, and boast about being single, but the right woman can come flying around the corner and chsnge everything you ever thought you knew. Stop worrying about the bullshit and just let life happen. View Quote Exactly! I remain unmarried to this day (age 53). I've had a long line of girl friends, some of whom lived with me for varying lengths of time, and dozens of one night stands, Right now I'm happily living with my current GF for several years now and still have no intention of getting married, but she's the first for me that ever made me consider it. Briefly. ;) She's still working on me, and with all previous ladies, that would have driven me away by now. I guess ya never know.... |
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The problem with marriage today is that no one, including the OP (it sounds like), takes marriage seriously. They start dating someone and immediately jump into bed with that person, starting to form a serious emotional bond with no commitment. After a while they end up giving the marriage a "test run" by moving in together. After this continues, they end up getting married, all without ever really understanding if they are right for each other.
Marriage is a very serious decision and should anyone ever decide to get married, it should be for life, not with the thought that you'll get married and see where it goes. The problem is when you are already sleeping with and shacked up with a person it's very easy to fall into marriage without understanding whom you're marrying. You can laugh at me for believing this way but divorce is non-existent in my family. I've seen the evidence with my own two eyes. |
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Hi Namaah. Well, I'm changing. Nor am I perfect. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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36 and single. Wish I had a wife, kids, etc. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile What are your standards? I want the same thing but I'm also very picky. I'm no Brad Pitt, but I'm tall, in good shape, educated, have a good job. All the young women who haven't married seem to be waiting for a movie star to come along. The more I date, honestly, the more frustrated I get. I'm at the age now where hookups aren't my thing. I want a real relationship with a wonderful woman. Your plethora of threads and posts advocating a "hit it and quit it" lifestyle say otherwise. Hi Namaah. Well, I'm changing. Nor am I perfect. No, you're not. The only thing that changes is the kind of horseshit you posting - one day it's about all the pussy you get, the next it's about leading people to a better relationship with God. Today, you're pissing and moaning about not being able to find a woman worthy of you. I'm pretty much convinced - and I'm not alone in this - that you only come here to say stupid shit so Naamah and I will slap you around. |
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I get that. But I'm assuming you haven't written relationships off entirely. Time to yourself after a shitty relationship is understandable and expected. I don't personally know anyone who is truly happier on their own. I know a few people who put on a show to make it seem that way, though. I'm not saying they aren't out there, but I think a lot of them have just given up. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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sometimes the damage from a prior relationship makes a person want to avoid a deeper relationship with another person. im in that boat now. but ive also known folks that are just happier on their own. I get that. But I'm assuming you haven't written relationships off entirely. Time to yourself after a shitty relationship is understandable and expected. I don't personally know anyone who is truly happier on their own. I know a few people who put on a show to make it seem that way, though. I'm not saying they aren't out there, but I think a lot of them have just given up. at this moment in time, i cannot fathom being that vulnerable with another person ever again. my inability to trust is also not something i would wish to inflict on anyone. but its only been a little over a year since my current marriage failed . and i have no doubt that at some point ill probably be dumb enough to want to get close to someone again |
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The problem with marriage today is that no one, including the OP (it sounds like), takes marriage seriously. They start dating someone and immediately jump into bed with that person, starting to form a serious emotional bond with no commitment. After a while they end up giving the marriage a "test run" by moving in together. After this continues they end up getting married all without ever really understanding if they are right for each other. Marriage is a very serious decision and should anyone ever decide to get married it should be for life, not with the thought that you'll get married and see where it goes. The problem is when you are already sleeping with and shacked up with a person it's very easy to fall into marriage without understanding who you're marrying. You can laugh at me for believing this way but divorce is non-existent in my family. I've seen the evidence with my own two eyes. View Quote Falling on deaf ears for the most part. If you aren't fucking dead serious, don't get married. Don't fuck right off wait 5 minutes at least. But this is the new America |
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No, you're not. The only thing that changes is the kind of horseshit you posting - one day it's about all the pussy you get, the next it's about leading people to a better relationship with God. Today, you're pissing and moaning about not being able to find a woman worthy of you. I'm pretty much convinced - and I'm not alone in this - that you only come here to say stupid shit so Naamah and I will slap you around. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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36 and single. Wish I had a wife, kids, etc. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile What are your standards? I want the same thing but I'm also very picky. I'm no Brad Pitt, but I'm tall, in good shape, educated, have a good job. All the young women who haven't married seem to be waiting for a movie star to come along. The more I date, honestly, the more frustrated I get. I'm at the age now where hookups aren't my thing. I want a real relationship with a wonderful woman. Your plethora of threads and posts advocating a "hit it and quit it" lifestyle say otherwise. Hi Namaah. Well, I'm changing. Nor am I perfect. No, you're not. The only thing that changes is the kind of horseshit you posting - one day it's about all the pussy you get, the next it's about leading people to a better relationship with God. Today, you're pissing and moaning about not being able to find a woman worthy of you. I'm pretty much convinced - and I'm not alone in this - that you only come here to say stupid shit so Naamah and I will slap you around. Yall should charge extra for that. He's single he can afford it |
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I assume you are not done with relationships entirely though, correct? I can understand having time for yourself. Everyone needs that. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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"Single", as in not married, I can understand. "Single", as in never having relationships, I do not understand (aside from time between relationships). People who "choose" the latter, probably didn't have a choice to begin with, for one reason or another. In true arfcom fashion , i got both of your options I got married young. Had kids , i was on top of the world, i was the fucking man . I had a plan, it was working, i could see the payoff. Yeah..........not so much , her pkan changed to "as much dick as she could handle" My plan, my life was over. Over a period of years, i rebuilt . As the pain subsided, a new plan emerged. More years go by, and finally , the plan is working. Kids are grown and one is married and working her own plan doing well with it. Other is a senior in HS, doing good . Over the past coupke 3 years, i have " succeeded" w my plan so far. Things are looking up still. However, without knowing it , i took another piece of advice from arfcom. I worked my ass off, i had hobbies, i acquired currency and eschewed the ladies. I had a few dates, never more than a first date for years. Dated a girl for 2 years back in 06-08 , didnt work out. 2 years later i dated a half alkie really nic3 girk for a couple weeks. Thats it as far as women . And i still caution those who espouse the view to live your life how you want and work on yourself and the women will beat a path to your door. That is so far from the truth its not funny. It is a good way to spend your life alone. So if people want a woman you actually have to try. I assume you are not done with relationships entirely though, correct? I can understand having time for yourself. Everyone needs that. I see what youre getting at . No im not opposed to a relationship. Howevet, after years of just....anger, i looked at the reasons my marriage failed. While i dont excuse my exes behavior, i realized my ......shortcomings and inadequacies might remove me from "serious relationship material" At this point , it is what it is. Im damn near 50, im not rich , or brad pitt good looking. I dont have ron jeromy s dick. Im not into the big girls. Right now im out of the meeting women phase. Ill recharge the mindset for a couple years maybe and try to motivate myself to try more. |
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1) dont screw around with someone else's heart.
2) determine what you want in life or at the very least what you dont want. 3) work towards making yourself the best you can be. Other than that dont get hung up on what you think society is saying you ought to be doing like being married with kids by 30, or single and own your own home i n the clear by 30. To be truthful I think as long as you arent being a total ass to everyone else around you, most people dont really care. Sure there will be some that think every one should be living life as they do, but you are your own person. Dont worry aboutwhat the others think. If you want to be single do it. But then dont worry that married folks think you're ultra selfish. If you want to marry and raise a family do it. Dont worry if the single folks think your ultra selfish. Seriously, aint nobody got time fo dat. Life is too short and we all have waaaaaay too much to get done before we kick off this rock. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile |
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at this moment in time, i cannot fathom being that vulnerable with another person ever again. my inability to trust is also not something i would wish to inflict on anyone. but its only been a little over a year since my current marriage failed . and i have no doubt that at some point ill probably be dumb enough to want to get close to someone again View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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sometimes the damage from a prior relationship makes a person want to avoid a deeper relationship with another person. im in that boat now. but ive also known folks that are just happier on their own. I get that. But I'm assuming you haven't written relationships off entirely. Time to yourself after a shitty relationship is understandable and expected. I don't personally know anyone who is truly happier on their own. I know a few people who put on a show to make it seem that way, though. I'm not saying they aren't out there, but I think a lot of them have just given up. at this moment in time, i cannot fathom being that vulnerable with another person ever again. my inability to trust is also not something i would wish to inflict on anyone. but its only been a little over a year since my current marriage failed . and i have no doubt that at some point ill probably be dumb enough to want to get close to someone again Ever again? That's drastic, IMO. Some people suck. Sometimes you get fucked over. Happens to everyone. I'm betting your mind will change sooner or later. It's a new year. Let go of the past and move on. You can't change it, only improve on your future. Yeah, easier said than done, I know. |
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I see what youre getting at . No im not opposed to a relationship. Howevet, after years of just....anger, i looked at the reasons my marriage failed. While i dont excuse my exes behavior, i realized my ......shortcomings and inadequacies might remove me from "serious relationship material" At this point , it is what it is. Im damn near 50, im not rich , or brad pitt good looking. I dont have ron jeromy s dick. Im not into the big girls. Right now im out of the meeting women phase. Ill recharge the mindset for a couple years maybe and try to motivate myself to try more. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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"Single", as in not married, I can understand. "Single", as in never having relationships, I do not understand (aside from time between relationships). People who "choose" the latter, probably didn't have a choice to begin with, for one reason or another. In true arfcom fashion , i got both of your options I got married young. Had kids , i was on top of the world, i was the fucking man . I had a plan, it was working, i could see the payoff. Yeah..........not so much , her pkan changed to "as much dick as she could handle" My plan, my life was over. Over a period of years, i rebuilt . As the pain subsided, a new plan emerged. More years go by, and finally , the plan is working. Kids are grown and one is married and working her own plan doing well with it. Other is a senior in HS, doing good . Over the past coupke 3 years, i have " succeeded" w my plan so far. Things are looking up still. However, without knowing it , i took another piece of advice from arfcom. I worked my ass off, i had hobbies, i acquired currency and eschewed the ladies. I had a few dates, never more than a first date for years. Dated a girl for 2 years back in 06-08 , didnt work out. 2 years later i dated a half alkie really nic3 girk for a couple weeks. Thats it as far as women . And i still caution those who espouse the view to live your life how you want and work on yourself and the women will beat a path to your door. That is so far from the truth its not funny. It is a good way to spend your life alone. So if people want a woman you actually have to try. I assume you are not done with relationships entirely though, correct? I can understand having time for yourself. Everyone needs that. I see what youre getting at . No im not opposed to a relationship. Howevet, after years of just....anger, i looked at the reasons my marriage failed. While i dont excuse my exes behavior, i realized my ......shortcomings and inadequacies might remove me from "serious relationship material" At this point , it is what it is. Im damn near 50, im not rich , or brad pitt good looking. I dont have ron jeromy s dick. Im not into the big girls. Right now im out of the meeting women phase. Ill recharge the mindset for a couple years maybe and try to motivate myself to try more. I get it, 100%. That makes sense to me. I had a bad habit of becoming complacent in relationships, and not trying after I "got" her. Something I had/have to work on. |
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No, you're not. The only thing that changes is the kind of horseshit you posting - one day it's about all the pussy you get, the next it's about leading people to a better relationship with God. Today, you're pissing and moaning about not being able to find a woman worthy of you. I'm pretty much convinced - and I'm not alone in this - that you only come here to say stupid shit so Naamah and I will slap you around. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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36 and single. Wish I had a wife, kids, etc. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile What are your standards? I want the same thing but I'm also very picky. I'm no Brad Pitt, but I'm tall, in good shape, educated, have a good job. All the young women who haven't married seem to be waiting for a movie star to come along. The more I date, honestly, the more frustrated I get. I'm at the age now where hookups aren't my thing. I want a real relationship with a wonderful woman. Your plethora of threads and posts advocating a "hit it and quit it" lifestyle say otherwise. Hi Namaah. Well, I'm changing. Nor am I perfect. No, you're not. The only thing that changes is the kind of horseshit you posting - one day it's about all the pussy you get, the next it's about leading people to a better relationship with God. Today, you're pissing and moaning about not being able to find a woman worthy of you. I'm pretty much convinced - and I'm not alone in this - that you only come here to say stupid shit so Naamah and I will slap you around. This. Pussy prime Christian is utter bullshit, totally insincere. |
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at this moment in time, i cannot fathom being that vulnerable with another person ever again. my inability to trust is also not something i would wish to inflict on anyone. but its only been a little over a year since my current marriage failed . and i have no doubt that at some point ill probably be dumb enough to want to get close to someone again View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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sometimes the damage from a prior relationship makes a person want to avoid a deeper relationship with another person. im in that boat now. but ive also known folks that are just happier on their own. I get that. But I'm assuming you haven't written relationships off entirely. Time to yourself after a shitty relationship is understandable and expected. I don't personally know anyone who is truly happier on their own. I know a few people who put on a show to make it seem that way, though. I'm not saying they aren't out there, but I think a lot of them have just given up. at this moment in time, i cannot fathom being that vulnerable with another person ever again. my inability to trust is also not something i would wish to inflict on anyone. but its only been a little over a year since my current marriage failed . and i have no doubt that at some point ill probably be dumb enough to want to get close to someone again I dated way too soon after my divorce. And drank like a fish. I wish I'd taken a break instead. I think you're doing well. |
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it took me 9yrs to propose to my wife, we are now on our 5yr anniversary. we have 2 great kids. its not easy, nor is it for everyone.
being single during/after college i had my fair share of partying and girls. sure its fun, but to be honest i have more money now, i have a great home, great kids and i dont have to worry about the drama of single life. i can walk in the door eat dinner and get a blow job w/o much effort. |
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