Quoted:
You mom should be in prison too, fuck em both.

Quoted:
Little long, but absolutely needs context.

First , my brothers a career criminal / druggy shitbag.  

Background.

Started at 12 years old, sketchy shit, theft, stealing car stereos, doing, buying, selling drugs, etc.  constant problems, my mother would be fighting in court to get him out of trouble, while he’s got 3-4 more pending cases, just endless bullshit. Stole my car, her car, her paycheck, wrote bad checks on her, 1000 other things.  Narced on everyone he knew / did undercover stings on friends, multiple times for reduced sentences, She coddled him, did everything possible to protect him from consequences.  

5 years in prison at 21 for drug shit.  came home, had a wife waiting, home, car, everything, just needed to work a job. Nope, sleep till noon, running all night, eventually got his wife on drugs and she lost her teaching job.  

Sketchy shit,  didn’t pay a speeding ticket, turned into a warrant while on parole,  cops tried to arrest at traffic stop, he runs , wrecks car, car jacks a dude, cops looking for him, mom gives him $5k to “ run “. He goes to Miami with his wife, calls a week later broke. Almost gets his wife raped by Miami shitbirds, who also steal his car. Now, Can’t get home. ( wife took bus home,)  I flat refuse to help, say the cops will happily ship him back for free. A few days later, My mom borrows my truck a few days later to buy a couch… then claims it was stolen. I report it stolen, etc. Turns out she gave it to his wife, to drive 1800 miles to Miami to fetch him. perfectly happy to fuck me over, simply to help enable him.

Doing court shit for car jacking, playing mentally ill, 2 months in a mental hospital, almost worked, but before it could get dismissed, he robs two banks. Does 20 years, gets out 2 years ago.

he’s 52 now, spent 1/2 his life in prison, never worked a job, EVER.  Mom died 2 years into his 20 years, so, no more enabling.

He calls me expecting to move in. I say fuck off, turn your life around, maybe I’ll talk to you. He gets a high school buddy to get him a job waiting tables, and sleeping on dudes couch. A month later he carjacks a 16 year old at knife point, caught, parole revoked. That was 2-3 years ago.  Apparently 5 years remaining sentence and 2 carjackings = being released with 3 years, because apparently he was released again.


Now… today. He calls me from North Carolina, is in a shelter, wants money, to get his life started, get SS card, license, blah blah. ( same thing 3 years earlier ).

I tell him this.

I told you before, turn your life around and prove your worth associating with. What did you do ? Carjacked a 16 year old girl. Your a shitbag, always have been, always will be. I’m not letting you, or your bullshit near my life, much less into if. Number blocked.

Obviously I feel kinda bad deep inside, as I SHOULD help out, as a Christian I should, etc. The fact is though, Iv seen him “ helped out “, dozens of times, never changes, and fucks over anyone who tries to help.  He likes being a shitbag, and will never change, me helping him would just fuck my life up big time, and accomplish jack shit, as he will be back in prison soon, I’d just delay it by helping, and uck my own life up. Fuck that. Best I can do is write him off, and keep that shit totally out of my life.

Am I a asshole ? Not in general, . For not helping this asshole out.

Quoted:
Little long, but absolutely needs context.

First , my brothers a career criminal / druggy shitbag.  

Background.

Started at 12 years old, sketchy shit, theft, stealing car stereos, doing, buying, selling drugs, etc.  constant problems, my mother would be fighting in court to get him out of trouble, while he's got 3-4 more pending cases, just endless bullshit. Stole my car, her car, her paycheck, wrote bad checks on her, 1000 other things.  Narced on everyone he knew / did undercover stings on friends, multiple times for reduced sentences, She coddled him, did everything possible to protect him from consequences.  

5 years in prison at 21 for drug shit.  came home, had a wife waiting, home, car, everything, just needed to work a job. Nope, sleep till noon, running all night, eventually got his wife on drugs and she lost her teaching job.  

Sketchy shit,  didn't pay a speeding ticket, turned into a warrant while on parole,  cops tried to arrest at traffic stop, he runs , wrecks car, car jacks a dude, cops looking for him, mom gives him $5k to " run ". He goes to Miami with his wife, calls a week later broke. Almost gets his wife raped by Miami shitbirds, who also steal his car. Now, Can't get home. ( wife took bus home,)  I flat refuse to help, say the cops will happily ship him back for free. A few days later, My mom borrows my truck a few days later to buy a couch  then claims it was stolen. I report it stolen, etc. Turns out she gave it to his wife, to drive 1800 miles to Miami to fetch him. perfectly happy to fuck me over, simply to help enable him.

Doing court shit for car jacking, playing mentally ill, 2 months in a mental hospital, almost worked, but before it could get dismissed, he robs two banks. Does 20 years, gets out 2 years ago.

he's 52 now, spent 1/2 his life in prison, never worked a job, EVER.  Mom died 2 years into his 20 years, so, no more enabling.

He calls me expecting to move in. I say fuck off, turn your life around, maybe I'll talk to you. He gets a high school buddy to get him a job waiting tables, and sleeping on dudes couch. A month later he carjacks a 16 year old at knife point, caught, parole revoked. That was 2-3 years ago.  Apparently 5 years remaining sentence and 2 carjackings = being released with 3 years, because apparently he was released again.


Now  today. He calls me from North Carolina, is in a shelter, wants money, to get his life started, get SS card, license, blah blah. ( same thing 3 years earlier ).

I tell him this.

I told you before, turn your life around and prove your worth associating with. What did you do ? Carjacked a 16 year old girl. Your a shitbag, always have been, always will be. I'm not letting you, or your bullshit near my life, much less into if. Number blocked.

Obviously I feel kinda bad deep inside, as I SHOULD help out, as a Christian I should, etc. The fact is though, Iv seen him " helped out ", dozens of times, never changes, and fucks over anyone who tries to help.  He likes being a shitbag, and will never change, me helping him would just fuck my life up big time, and accomplish jack shit, as he will be back in prison soon, I'd just delay it by helping, and uck my own life up. Fuck that. Best I can do is write him off, and keep that shit totally out of my life.

Am I a asshole ? Not in general, . For not helping this asshole out.

Quoted:
She coddled him, did everything possible to protect him from consequences.  

eventually got his wife on drugs and she lost her teaching job.  

A few days later, My mom borrows my truck a few days later to buy a couch  then claims it was stolen. I report it stolen, etc. Turns out she gave it to his wife, to drive 1800 miles to Miami to fetch him. perfectly happy to fuck me over, simply to help enable him.

Examples of previous people enabling him. ^^^

Obviously I feel kinda bad deep inside, as I SHOULD help out, as a Christian I should, etc.

You thinking you should be enabling him. ^^^

The fact is though, Iv seen him " helped out ", dozens of times, never changes, and fucks over anyone who tries to help.  He likes being a shitbag, and will never change, me helping him would just fuck my life up big time, and accomplish jack shit, as he will be back in prison soon, I'd just delay it by helping, and uck my own life up. Fuck that. Best I can do is write him off, and keep that shit totally out of my life.

You admitting enabling him is an exceptionally Bad Idea^tm. ^^^

Quoted:
You're not the asshole. He is for asking.

Quoted:
Little long, but absolutely needs context.

First , my brothers a career criminal / druggy shitbag.  

Quoted:
Little long, but absolutely needs context.

First , my brothers a career criminal / druggy shitbag.  

Background.

Started at 12 years old, sketchy shit, theft, stealing car stereos, doing, buying, selling drugs, etc.  constant problems, my mother would be fighting in court to get him out of trouble, while he’s got 3-4 more pending cases, just endless bullshit. Stole my car, her car, her paycheck, wrote bad checks on her, 1000 other things.  Narced on everyone he knew / did undercover stings on friends, multiple times for reduced sentences, She coddled him, did everything possible to protect him from consequences.  

5 years in prison at 21 for drug shit.  came home, had a wife waiting, home, car, everything, just needed to work a job. Nope, sleep till noon, running all night, eventually got his wife on drugs and she lost her teaching job.  

Sketchy shit,  didn’t pay a speeding ticket, turned into a warrant while on parole,  cops tried to arrest at traffic stop, he runs , wrecks car, car jacks a dude, cops looking for him, mom gives him $5k to “ run “. He goes to Miami with his wife, calls a week later broke. Almost gets his wife raped by Miami shitbirds, who also steal his car. Now, Can’t get home. ( wife took bus home,)  I flat refuse to help, say the cops will happily ship him back for free. A few days later, My mom borrows my truck a few days later to buy a couch… then claims it was stolen. I report it stolen, etc. Turns out she gave it to his wife, to drive 1800 miles to Miami to fetch him. perfectly happy to fuck me over, simply to help enable him.

Doing court shit for car jacking, playing mentally ill, 2 months in a mental hospital, almost worked, but before it could get dismissed, he robs two banks. Does 20 years, gets out 2 years ago.

he’s 52 now, spent 1/2 his life in prison, never worked a job, EVER.  Mom died 2 years into his 20 years, so, no more enabling.

He calls me expecting to move in. I say fuck off, turn your life around, maybe I’ll talk to you. He gets a high school buddy to get him a job waiting tables, and sleeping on dudes couch. A month later he carjacks a 16 year old at knife point, caught, parole revoked. That was 2-3 years ago.  Apparently 5 years remaining sentence and 2 carjackings = being released with 3 years, because apparently he was released again.


Now… today. He calls me from North Carolina, is in a shelter, wants money, to get his life started, get SS card, license, blah blah. ( same thing 3 years earlier ).

I tell him this.

I told you before, turn your life around and prove your worth associating with. What did you do ? Carjacked a 16 year old girl. Your a shitbag, always have been, always will be. I’m not letting you, or your bullshit near my life, much less into if. Number blocked.

Obviously I feel kinda bad deep inside, as I SHOULD help out, as a Christian I should, etc. The fact is though, Iv seen him “ helped out “, dozens of times, never changes, and fucks over anyone who tries to help.  He likes being a shitbag, and will never change, me helping him would just fuck my life up big time, and accomplish jack shit, as he will be back in prison soon, I’d just delay it by helping, and uck my own life up. Fuck that. Best I can do is write him off, and keep that shit totally out of my life.

Am I a asshole ? Not in general, . For not helping this asshole out.

Quoted:
Tough love is required. You are not the asshole. Don't become an enabler.

Quoted:
If I had a brother like that the only time I’d ever see him again would be at his funeral to make sure he was actually dead.

Quoted:
I believe you are right to not enable him any further.  Benevolent groups like the Salvation Army will help him if he is really and truly serious.

Quoted:
Your not the asshole if it was my brother I probably put him down myself, to old to change life now probably kill somebody one day.

Quoted:
Tough love is required. You are not the asshole. Don't become an enabler.