I have shot an AR 45 (blowback) with ball 230 grain suppressed. At least 400 rounds over a 3 or 4 occasions, and it was very quiet and really pleasant. I have also shot way more 9mm 115 gr. ball and subsonic ammo . To me, the benefit of the 45 was mostly due to the fact that 230 gr. ball ammo is common and fairly inexpensive for a subsonic round.
Compared to 9mm, there's no need to hunt down special subsonic rounds for the 45. Any 230 grain will do. With the heavy buffer in the 45, you felt a healthier "bump" from the recoil, but nothing particularly offensive or harsh. I personally liked the kick of the 45, and it knocked around the steel targets with much more authority than the 9mm. I also feel that the 45 ball ammo is a proven defensive round, so even without a high performance hollow point, 45 ball ammo is effective stuff. With a 10" barrel and suppressor, it was easy to shoot and very quiet.
It's an academic issue anyway. The 9mm subsonic is around 160 grains, vs. 230 for the 45, so the 45 always packs a bigger punch. But if you are shooting the carbine for high volume, fun blasting, then get the 9mm for less expensive ammo. You really cannot find any center-fire ammo less expensive than 9mm pistol ammo, and you can buy the occasional box of subsonic ammo.
Even though I really like my 45 AR, and think it a better defensive caliber than 9mm, for economy and volume shooting, I vote 9mm.
Here's a post of some of my rifles and the process I went through tuning the 45. (don't be thrown off by the pictures, I've had uppers with both 9mm and 45, each in 10.5 and 16" barrels, and I've tested them all, but didn't get a picture of every combination).
https://www.ar15.com/forums/ar-15/put-together-a-New-Frontier-45-auto-AR-this-weekend-update-with-16-barrel-and-pics/15-727285/