About 10 years ago, at the main Baptist Hospital here in San Antonio, the huge Christmas
tree in the lobby was decorated with chili pepper lights, in conjunction with the 'fiesta' atmosphere in
South Texas.  Well, one person complained that it was a  slam at Hispanics, so the hospital
administration ordered that the lights be removed.

Oh well, such is life, eh?

Bill
*******************************************************************************************************************
 December 1
 
 TO: ALL EMPLOYEES
 
 I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on
 December 23rd at Luigi's Open Pit Barbecue. There will be lots of spiked
 eggnog and a small band playing traditional carols...feel free to sing
 along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus to
 light the Christmas tree! Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at
 that time; however, no gift should be over $10. Merry Christmas to you and
 your family.

 Patty Lewis
 Human Resources Director
*******************************************************************************************************
 December 2nd
 TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

 In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees.
 We recognize that, Hanukkah is an important holiday that often coincides
 with Christmas (though unfortunately not this year). However, from now on
 we're calling it our "Holiday Party." The same policy applies to employees
 who are celebrating Kwanzaa at this time. There will be no Christmas tree
 and no Christmas carols sung. Happy Holidays to you and your family.

 Patty Lewis
 Human Resources Director
*******************************************************************************************************
 December 3rd
 TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

 Regarding the anonymous note I received from a member of Alcoholics
 Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table, I'm happy to accommodate this
 request, but, don't forget, if I put a sign on the table that reads, "AA
 Only," you won't be anonymous anymore. In addition, forget about the gifts
 exchange-no gifts will be allowed since the union members feel that $10 is
 too much money.

 Patty Lewis
 Human Researchers Director
*******************************************************************************************************
 December 7th
 TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

 I've arranged for members of Overeaters Anonymous to sit farthest from the
 dessert buffet and pregnant women closest to the restrooms. Gays are
 allowed to sit with each other. Lesbians do not have to sit with the gay
 men; each will have their table. Yes, there will be a flower arrangement
 for the gay men's table. Happy now?

 Patty Lewis
 Human Racehorses Director
*******************************************************************************************************
 December 9th
 TO: ALL EMPLOYEES
 People, people-nothing sinister was intended by wanting our CEO to play
 Santa Claus! Even if the anagram of "Santa" does happen to be "Satan,"
 there is no evil connotation to our own "little man in a red suit."

 Patty Lewis
 Human Ratraces

Aren't lawyers wonderful?