Some ways to tell if your Amish teen is in trouble

Site Notices

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Some ways to tell if your Amish teen is in trouble

Posted: 7/13/2001 6:00:38 PM EDT

A friend sent this to me. Living around here we have quite a few Amish folks:

Sometimes stays in bed till after 5:00AM.

In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women without bonnets.

Shows up at barn raisings in full "Kiss" makeup.

When you criticize him, he yells, "Thou sucketh!"

His name is Jebediah, but he goes by "Jeb Daddy."

Defiantly says, "If I had a radio, I'd listen to rap!"

You come upon his secret stash of colorful socks.

Uses slang expression: "Talk to the hand, cause the beard ain't listening."

Posted: 7/13/2001 6:22:22 PM EDT

[#1]

[left]I live right in the middle of amish they drive right past my door, i can step out right now there would be a horse and buggy driving buy. buy the way amish are not poor ol dumb folks, some are rich a lot of dough. ive worked with one fellow by the name cris newiswandwerwhateverthehellyouspellit. at first i though what a country folk but we went to a big city he new everybody no joke we did not walk in a store with out saying hi to somebody
i mean he knew these guy's. this guy owned a multi million dollar business this guy subcontracted with a boat manufacture building 60ft houseboats, i mean these boats were like condo's on water.

Posted: 7/13/2001 6:36:47 PM EDT

[#2]

MG_ME, near Byrne (forgive my spelling)/ Ohio state line? We have Amish in the Covington/Troy/Piqua area. Wife' family is German Baptist-have automobile,electricity and phones.

Posted: 7/13/2001 6:41:12 PM EDT

[#3]

Dude, come on, some of my best friends are Amish.

Posted: 7/13/2001 6:47:51 PM EDT

[#4]

Originally Posted By SBR7/11:
MG_ME, near Byrne (forgive my spelling)/ Ohio state line? We have Amish in the Covington/Troy/Piqua area. Wife' family is German Baptist-have automobile,electricity and phones.

View Quote

Yep; i been to troy. these amish are strict order some only has small generator's. the town
i live in is very religous, and quiet.

Posted: 7/13/2001 6:55:30 PM EDT

[#5]

Was wondering about the reponses I would get. I would poke fun at myself as much as someone else would. Maybe more, [:D] Being of German ancestry, I guess I can do it.

I live in Berks County, and that along with Lancaster and Lebanon Connies is supposed to be the heart of Pa German country in Pa.

I still think its funny though...

Posted: 7/13/2001 6:58:56 PM EDT

[#6]

BTW, if you are observant, you'll notice that these kids can get in as much trouble as any teenager can.

Just hang around Green Dragon on a Fri nite. [;)]

Alot of folks hold them to a higher standard which isn't correct.

Posted: 7/13/2001 7:18:11 PM EDT

[#7]

[b]Originally Posted By SBR7/11:
MG_ME, near Byrne (forgive my spelling)/ Ohio state line? We have Amish in the Covington/Troy/Piqua area. Wife' family is German Baptist-have automobile,electricity and phones.[/b]

View Quote

The ones with the Cars and such are the rogue Amish, also known as Mennonites. The women still wear the bonnets and such and the men have the
beards and names like Zebediah and Ezekiel. It is like Amish lite when they bail out and become Mennonites. Typically the Mennonites are shunned by the Amish as heretics. The Amish have been known to break bad on a Mennonites ass on occasion because some of the Amish womenfolk fall prey to the dark side of the Mennonite lifestyle.

BTW, ZZTop wrote the song "Tube Snake Boogie" about a Mennonite girl who used to be Amish.[sex]

Seriously, I mean it.[smoke]

Posted: 7/13/2001 7:44:58 PM EDT

[#8]

Here's probably the only two Amish jokes I know.

An Amish family goes to town one day shopping. As the father and his oldest son are looking on, an elderly woman approaches a pair of large silver doors. She presses a button and the doors slide open. She enters and the doors close.

"What is that, father?" asks the son.

"I don't know, son." replies the father.

Momentarily, the door opens and a very pretty young lady steps out. Father and son just look on in amazment. "Son," says father, "go get your mother."

What do you call an Amish man with his arm up to his elbow in a horses' behind?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
A mechanic [:D]

Posted: 7/13/2001 9:20:28 PM EDT

[#9]

What goes "Clop-Clop,Clop-Clop,bangbangbangbang,Clop-Clop,Clop-Clop ?

An Amish drive-by.[:D]

Posted: 7/14/2001 5:00:08 AM EDT

[#10]

Hey,Hershberger!Your saw has been ready two months now.Get one of your employees on the phone.

Posted: 7/14/2001 5:19:59 AM EDT

[#11]

Sarah is toolin` down the road in her buggy, and gets pulled over by a trooper. She asks "sir, whatever is the trouble?" Trooper tells her the reason he stopped her, the rear lites on the buggy are out. She promises to have Eli make sure they`re full of kerosene as soon as she gets home. The cop then says "ma`m.i also noticed that one of your raines is wrapped around the horses testicles and that does not look right to me" She assures him that will also be adressed, and the officer tells her to procede and have a good evening.Of course sarah is upset upon arriving home...and Eli,worried, asks her what`s wrong...she explains "Eli, i was stopped by an officer of the law, who said that our buggy lites are not working" Eli says he`ll take care of it right away, and is that all? Sarah says "well, he also said that there is something wrong with the emergency brake!"..........[smoke]

Posted: 7/14/2001 5:21:50 AM EDT

[#12]

Only place I ever saw a gas engine on a wash machine!................[rolleyes]

Posted: 7/14/2001 5:43:13 AM EDT

[#13]

Ok, here's one for you...

Two Amish women are working in the garden, picking turnips. Bein' alone, they get to
talking as women do, an' one of 'em holds
a pair of big turnips at eye level and says
to the other "You know, these look just like
my husband Otis's balls." They other says
"Really? Are they that big?"

The first women replies "No! - They're that
dirty!!!"

Posted: 7/14/2001 5:51:32 AM EDT

[#14]

[url]www.electricamish.com[/url]

High Performance Tactical Gear!
[url]www.Lightfighter.com[/url]

Posted: 7/14/2001 6:45:10 AM EDT

[#15]

Quoted:
[url]www.electricamish.com[/url]

High Performance Tactical Gear!
[url]www.Lightfighter.com[/url]

View Quote

That link is gonna get some mileage.

Posted: 7/14/2001 6:59:19 AM EDT

[#16]

I live in Wi amish country...I get a kick out of groups of Amish teenagers in Cabels
they love firearms...arround here they pretty well clean out the wildlife...all are avid hunters and own rifles...they just prefer single shots and level actions (autos are verbotten)..although they probably could own a horse or bicycle powered gatling gun

Posted: 7/14/2001 7:01:50 AM EDT

[#17]

Quoted:
I live in Wi amish country...I get a kick out of groups of Amish teenagers in Cabels
they love firearms...arround here they pretty well clean out the wildlife...all are avid hunters and own rifles...they just prefer single shots and level actions (autos are verbotten)..although they probably could own a horse or bicycle powered gatling gun

View Quote

Or one powered by gasoline engine!!!!![heavy]

Posted: 7/16/2001 4:19:43 AM EDT

[#18]

I see alot of them in the spring fishing.They all have spinning tackle.

Posted: 7/16/2001 4:25:34 AM EDT

[#19]

Hey Amish people don't exist, their like the tooth faerie, Santa, elves, and Canadians.

Posted: 7/16/2001 9:28:10 AM EDT

[#20]

I didn't believe that this was real until I looked for myself. There really is a place called Intercourse, PA.
While on the [url]http://www.theamishcountry.com[/url]I came across this:

It's Here...the Intercourse Gazette, a monthly look at historical and social events and a calendar to keep you updated on what's happening in the Lancaster County region.

If you have any questions about this site or about Intercourse in general, please email Levi Stoltzfus,our webmaster.

View Quote

I think poor Levi is asking for trouble...

Posted: 7/16/2001 9:42:41 AM EDT

[#21]

Amish jokes, makes me laugh and think of the movie KINGPIN -hahaha

Posted: 7/16/2001 10:00:49 AM EDT

[#22]

Originally Posted By AR in the woods:
I didn't believe that this was real until I looked for myself. There really is a place called Intercourse, PA.
While on the [url]http://www.theamishcountry.com[/url]I came across this:

It's Here...the Intercourse Gazette, a monthly look at historical and social events and a calendar to keep you updated on what's happening in the Lancaster County region.

If you have any questions about this site or about Intercourse in general, please email Levi Stoltzfus,our webmaster.

View Quote

I think poor Levi is asking for trouble...

View Quote

Other places in Lancaster County that might draw a second glance: Bird-In-Hand, Paradise, Blue Ball, Gap, and I'm sure I missed one or two.

Kurt (Living across the river in York County)

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Some ways to tell if your Amish teen is in trouble

General » General Discussion

Warning

Confirm Action

About AR15.COM

Stay Connected

Newsletter

Contact Us