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Posted: 7/19/2005 9:56:15 AM EDT
Had a great lunch at the Texas Land And Cattle restaurant. I decide to hit the men's room before I
leave. I walk in and some guy is yacking love talk to some women (cell phone) while he's  I proceed to take care of my aching bladder when another guy steps up to the urinal next to me and start talking about Lance Armstrong.  HELLO! I have my pecker in my hand! Don't look at me and this is not a good time to talk bicycles! WTF!What kind of freak talks to their GF when they're taking a dump and who wants to talk to another man when he's draining his Jake?!?  Rant over. EDITED to clarify cell phone. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 9:58:50 AM EDT
[#1]
Men who enjoy chatting in public restrooms have obviously spent far too much time holding their peckers talking in public restrooms.
HS1 |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:00:14 AM EDT
[#2]
Men's Room Rules:
1) No talking 2) No peeking 3 - Infinity) See #1 and #2 |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:00:30 AM EDT
[#3]
There should be a law against men speaking to other men in restroom (unless it's an emergency, like someone's on fire or something). |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:00:33 AM EDT
[#4]
Two of the man rules were clearly violated. Man cards revoked.
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:00:51 AM EDT
[#5]
A local radio talk program got a letter from a listener who was on the pot in a public restroom when a guy went into the adjoining stall. His neighbor says, "Hi." The listener says "Hi" back. The other guy says, "So, what are you doing?" The first guy says, "Well, same as you, I guess." The neighbor then says, "So, you wanna come over later?" The first guys says, "What the hell are you talking about?" The neighbor then says, "I'll have to call you back, the guy in the next stall keeps talking to me."
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:01:18 AM EDT
[#6]
Everytime you are up at the urinal you have about a 3% chance the guy next to you is gay.
That was your "lucky" day  - use the stall - 
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:01:44 AM EDT
[#7]
Hmmmm...let me think...who could it be.... Texas..... Yacking to women as he drops wolf bait, but really interested in men...... Checks out your yutz as you wizz.... Uses conversation to survey your goods on the sly.... Hmmmm....sounds like a few people here. 
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:01:48 AM EDT
[#8]
I don't get it either. That and you can be the only guy in there, with a whole line of empty urinals, and the next guy coming in has to stand right next to you?
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:02:05 AM EDT
[#9]
I see your point, DK, but I think I'm going to hold the line. NO TALKING. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:02:07 AM EDT
[#10]
So let me get this straight..
A dude is taking a shit, and his girl is outside of the stall talking to him ? Definately no talking while draining the lizard... ETA... I get it now..the dude is on his cellphone... Still taking a dump while on the phone in a public restroom is gainst the rules...
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:03:56 AM EDT
[#11]
BTW: taking a dump is not "laying pipe"
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:05:14 AM EDT
[#12]
As far as I'm concerned an occasional "We could use a courtesy flush in here!" is OK. Otherwise drop your stink pickle and be done with it!
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:06:06 AM EDT
[#13]
+1 
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:06:45 AM EDT
[#14]
You understand how your thread reads correct? If I include the title, what you said is:
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:07:29 AM EDT
[#15]
Worse:
I was in a movie theatre after watching Star Wars. I was washing my hands when around the corner comes a dude heading for the urinal. The problem? It was already out. He had begun taking it out while still in the public area before he ever came into the restroom entrance. And then he gets to the bathroom and has to cross a very large room, pecker in hand. Keep it holstered until you are on the firing line there, skippy. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:07:49 AM EDT
[#16]
Missed that one at first. Acceptable euphemisms: Parking a coil Busting a loaf Dropping the kids off at the pool Giving birth to Rosie Having a podge Dropping the bomb (or laying suppressive fire, as appropriate) Making In the transporter room beaming supplies down to the planet |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:08:33 AM EDT
[#17]
Big +1. It looked to me like you walked in on a guy having a threesome! |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:09:15 AM EDT
[#18]
+1 "laying pipe" is making fuckee fuckee which really freaked me out when I heard you were on the toilet. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:10:47 AM EDT
[#19]
No talking unless its a something like whats up when your washing your hands
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:11:10 AM EDT
[#20]
There should be a law against talking on cell phones in the bathroom. Screw it lets just ban cell phones do it for the children. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:11:22 AM EDT
[#21]
A woman I work with tells me that there was a lady singing opera-esque songs in the stall one day. There’s also this old fat lady that works in my 3 story building that works on the 2nd floor that always comes to the 3rd floor to take a dump or piss and talks on the cell phone as she does it.
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:12:21 AM EDT
[#22]
I think it's even more strange that he is talking to a guy in the bathroom while holding a pecker and talking about a guy with one testicle...
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:12:42 AM EDT
[#23]
A nod (at most) should be sufficient. Or say, "I hear this is where the dinks hang out" while at the urinal.
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:14:01 AM EDT
[#24]
Lance Armstrong? You guys clearly had a "moment".
 It does'nt get much gayer than talking bicycles.
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:14:22 AM EDT
[#25]
Drowning a wharf rat dumping crapping cleaning thepipes stress testing the plumbing offloading scheissen squatching a doob thunking splashing the bowl These are not all inclusive, but the common theme is... NONE IS ALSO A EUPHAMISM FOR SEX. Please remember this. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:16:33 AM EDT
[#26]
My bust. I should have mentioned he was on his cell phone. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:17:15 AM EDT
[#27]
Same goes for women's room too. I have no idea why women have to follow other women in the bathroom and chat non stop. That's crazy. Patty
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:19:44 AM EDT
[#28]
 My bust.So, he was dropping monkey arms and.... |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:20:15 AM EDT
[#29]
".....so that Lance Armstrong is looking unbeatable..."
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:22:05 AM EDT
[#30]
...nice pecker
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:22:52 AM EDT
[#31]
If a guy is on fire, you can wait for him outside the rest room to tell him. A little thing like third degree burns is NO EXCUSE for breaking the rules. I mean, what if he says, "I know. Can we meet later?" THEN where would you be? 
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:23:25 AM EDT
[#32]
I frequently am talking on my cellphone while using a public bathroom, be it with a GF or anyone else. At home, I never go to the bathroom to take a dump without my cordless home phone and sometimes my cellphone too. I can't begin to count the number of business calls and teleconferences I've held while sitting on the toilet. Surely, I try to minimize any sound/noise exposure by using the mute button when necessary and carefully controlling the rate of output. I don't see anything wrong with it at all.
ETA: There's nothing I like better when checking into a hotel room than finding a phone by the toilet. Not that I ever use them, b/c using my cellphone is much cheaper... but still I admire their thinking. Sometimes, I even take my laptop into the bathroom when I know I'll be a while. You've probably read posts I've left while sitting on the toilet at some time or another. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:24:27 AM EDT
[#33]
launching a mud skud
firing off a stink pickle 20mm Mortar Fire Mission, firing for effect! |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:24:50 AM EDT
[#34]
Hope that guy isn't in the mens room when my little boy decides he has to go. (He's too big to go with me, but still so small...)
I'm paranoid that there will be a pervert in there. If I so much as hear a peep or suspect some jerk is looking at, talking to, or touching my son, I'm ready to go in and rip his balls out through his nose. I stand out side and give all the guys that go in that wild-dangerous-mamma-bear look. Gentlemen, you have been warned. 
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:24:50 AM EDT
[#35]
I don't know but one or more people are flaming in that scenario. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:25:59 AM EDT
[#36]
Where were you during lunch today. 
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:27:36 AM EDT
[#37]
I went into the rest room the other and saw what looked like a woman at the urinal .... I thought, it's a urinal, so Im in the right place ... it is a man with long hair taking a wizzz while talking on the phone. So I pull up to the next urinal, now I normally don't fart in public but I had chinese shrimp fried rice for lunch and the pressure was reaching dangerous levels. So I let out the loudest fart i could. He tells the person on the phone "hold on" and puts the phone in his pocket....
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:28:13 AM EDT
[#38]
I'm with you on that one. It drives my son crazy, but I always go in, look around and then I guard the door until he's through. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:29:29 AM EDT
[#39]
 Classic!
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:30:48 AM EDT
[#40]
Wait...I am confused. This guy was on the turd herder dropping mud and talking on the cell at the same time. He came out, saw you and then realized he had to strop his jake? I don't get it. I have never pinched off a loaf only to leave the john and then say...oh gee...I forgot to pee! Doesn't happen. As previously stated, that guy was a homo. How do we know he was talking love talk to a chick. Maybe you stumpled on a "Tea Room" or a "Texas Glory Hole."
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:30:49 AM EDT
[#41]
Do you ever go to a urinal, then lean way over the divider to the guy beside you, look down, then make eye contact and say - "Hey, nice penis." ??? Yeah, me neither. Also, don't forget: Laying cable Giving birth to a Marine Making a deposit at the Stank of America |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:31:58 AM EDT
[#42]
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:33:50 AM EDT
[#43]
There are three semi-sentences you are allowed to speak in the restroom.
1) Brrr. Wow, the water is cold. to which the response from your neighbor is... 2) ....and deep to which the reponse from you is... 3) Ow! Damn fish.  Otherwise a mens restroom is like a monastary. Silence! except for the chanting, which is the muzak piped over the restroom speakers if it is so equiped. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:39:16 AM EDT
[#44]
That's funny as hell Reminds me of a bathroom story that has nothing to do with cell phones: I was at a black tie wedding when a buddy of mine came into the bathroom while I was standing there taking a pee at a urinal. There were several other people in the bathroom at that time, including family members of both sides of the wedding party. My buddy (who is NOT gay, nor am I) walks up and begins using the urinal right next to mine, looks over the divider while he's peeing, and loudly says "Wow! Nice dick!" so that everyone around could here. I bowed my head in embarassment while laughing at the same time. Needless to say, once we were back in the ballroom where the wedding was taking place, people were looking at over at us and whispering and snickering. This type of thing is not uncommon with my buddy. He's the same guy that walks over to me while I'm talking to any girl and will introduce himself as my 'boyfriend' just to mess with me. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:40:29 AM EDT
[#45]
Clearly a broken man-rule. The closest you can go to someone at the urinal line is halfway between them and the furthest wall, or halfway between them and the nearest person. Jim |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:41:11 AM EDT
[#46]
No lie, I swear!!! You beat me to it. Exactly what my friend did. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:44:53 AM EDT
[#47]
You could have at least spared us this bit of info..... |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:44:55 AM EDT
[#48]
Patty, you are clearly not like the vast majority of women. You are both sane and understandable to the male half of the species. |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:47:38 AM EDT
[#49]
Point. Set. MATCH. And furthermore, what if he thinks you mean "You are really hot"? |
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Posted: 7/19/2005 10:47:50 AM EDT
[#50]
When I am sending a Admiral out to sea, I like to observe silence
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