I'm sure that you have heard all the Redneck jokes. Here are some takes on
how Southern folks look at their Northern cousins:
YOU JUST MIGHT BE A "BLUENECK" if . . . . .
1. You think barbecue is a verb meaning, "to cook outside."
2. You think Heinz Ketchup is really SPICY!
3. You don't have any problems pronouncing "Worcestershire sauce" correctly.
4. For breakfast, you would prefer potato au gratin to grits
5. You don't know what a moon pie is
6. You've never had an RC cola
7. You've never, ever, eaten okra, fried or boiled
8. You eat fried chicken with a knife and fork
9. The only cows you've seen are on road trips
10. You have no idea what a polecat is
11. You don't see anything wrong with putting a sweater on a poodle
12. You don't have bangs
13. You would rather vacation at Martha's Vineyard than Six Flags
14. More than two generations of your family have been kicked out of the same prep school in Connecticut
15. You would rather have your son become a lawyer than grow up to get his own TV fishing show
16. Instead of referring to two or more people as "y'all," you call them "you guys," even if both of them are women
17. You don't think Ted Kennedy has an accent
18. You have never planned your summer vacation around a gun-n-knife show
19. You think more money should go to important scientific research at your university than to pay the salary of the head football coach
20. You don't have at least one can of WD-40 somewhere around the house
21. The last time you smiled was when you prevented someone from getting on an on-ramp to the highway
22. You don't have any hats in your closet that advertise feed stores
23. The farthest south you've ever been is the perfume counter at Neiman Marcus
24. You call binoculars opera glasses
25. You can't spit out the car window without pulling over to the side of the road and stopping
26. You would never wear pink or an appliqué sweatshirt
27. You don't know what appliqué is
28. You don't know anyone with at least two first names (i.e., Joe Bob, Faye Ellen, Billy Ray, Mary Jo, Bubba Dean, Joe Dan, Mary Alice, et al)
29. You don't have doilies, and you certainly don't know how to make one
30. You've never been to a craft show
31. You get freaked out when people on the subway talk to you
32. You can do your laundry without quarters
33. None of your fur coats are homemade