Need a good white elephant gift

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Need a good white elephant gift (Page 1 of 3)

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:23:41 AM EDT

Need a white elephant gift for a yearly gift exchange gathering--don't have any ideas. None of these people are gun people so doesn't have to be gun related. help me find one.

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:24:42 AM EDT

[#1]

Obama Chia pet.

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:25:44 AM EDT

[#2]

Is this like "Secret Santa"?

WTF ever happened to the phrase "Secret Santa"?!?

Walmart/Target style gift basket.

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:25:46 AM EDT

[#3]

Gift card that say $25, but has zero balance

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:26:47 AM EDT

[#4]

Go to Goodwill, find the ugliest fucking sweater you can possibly find.

Give gift.

LOLs

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:28:01 AM EDT

[#5]

Multi-tool. It's my gateway drug to bringing people to the light.

Give them a Leatherman or Gerber and next thing you know they're carrying a Benchmade auto, getting their CCW and asking you for advice on treestands.

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:28:17 AM EDT

[#6]

Quote History

Quoted:
Is this like "Secret Santa"?

WTF ever happened to the phrase "Secret Santa"?!?

Walmart/Target style gift basket.

View Quote

This is like Secret santa, except in this game, you can either choose to take someone else's gift or open an unopened gift when it's your turn.

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:31:27 AM EDT

[#7]

Quote History

Quoted:
Multi-tool. It's my gateway drug to bringing people to the light.

Give them a Leatherman or Gerber and next thing you know they're carrying a Benchmade auto, getting their CCW and asking you for advice on treestands.

View Quote

I don't think "white elephant" means what you think. What you suggest would be a damn good gift and is a good idea.

OP is looking for a gag for laughs.

Hey.... How about a gag? Like for a gimp?

Funny stuff!

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:34:19 AM EDT

[#8]

Shake weight

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:35:26 AM EDT

[#9]

A movie from redbox.

Of course if they don't return it, the jokes on you.

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:37:00 AM EDT

[#10]

I did a 5lb box of frozen Gulf shrimp a few times, just transport in a cooler with ice packs. It was funny watching everyone trying to trade it off thinking it was veggis or bait then they all fought over it after unwrapping.

Cost about $25 from the shrimp docks.

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:37:53 AM EDT

[#11]

White Elephant = BAD gift.

Secret Santa = Good gift, but giver is not identified.

Bad sweater
Office products that they readily have access to
A VCR (VHS is good, Betamax is better)
Undesirable food products (can of spotted dick, souse, etc)

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:38:27 AM EDT

[#12]

A few years ago I gave a Butt Out deer skinning tool. It went over like a lead balloon and I don't go to the company parties anymore.

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:39:21 AM EDT

[#13]

Yo Dawg, I heard you were exchanging White Elephant Christmas gifts.
So I got you a White Elephant for your White Elephant.

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:39:34 AM EDT

[#14]

I used to give Playboy Calendars out (if they still even make those anymore).

Funny to see who ends up with it....

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:43:11 AM EDT

[#15]

I purchased an inflatable doll for a white elephant gift a few years back. It was really cheesy looking, with blond hair painted on with cheesy yellow paint and big red lips in the classic "O" shape.

Wife said she paid $30.00 for it, but it was worth the laughs.

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:48:56 AM EDT

[#16]

A white elephant is a bad gift theyre obliged to KEEP and, ideally, MAINTAIN.

hard to do.

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:51:47 AM EDT

[#17]

Ass wiper for fat people-attach toilet paper on one the end so they can get back there.

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:51:50 AM EDT

[#18]

I gave my 7 year old nephew a drum kit for his birthday last year.

His parents WERE NOT pleased with me. My little buddy loves me though. I'm his favorite uncle.

Posted: 11/21/2013 5:57:34 AM EDT

[#19]

If memory serves, there are THREE types of gift exchanges:

White elephant - bad gift
Secret Santa- good gift

And

Dirty Santa - any kind of gift but you draw numbers or determine a draw order. You randomly pick a gift and open it. If you don't like it, you have the option of taking a gift from someone that has opened an earlier gift you like better and giving them yours. The last person to pick has the best position as they can pick from any of the previously opened gifts.

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:31:14 AM EDT

[#20]

Go to Asian market and get a 25lb bag of dried hot peppers.
Or look in the canned goods aisle for nastiest stuff you can find like silkworm pupae.

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:34:31 AM EDT

[#21]

Pmag then say ahh you probably wont use it, I'll take it. Win Win

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:34:56 AM EDT

[#22]

I always stock up on good old classic fishing reels from yard sales. My gifts at those things are a good way to find out who is a regular guy and who is a meterosexual.

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:35:03 AM EDT

[#23]

Quote History

Quoted:
I gave my 7 year old nephew a drum kit for his birthday last year.

His parents WERE NOT pleased with me. My little buddy loves me though. I'm his favorite uncle.

View Quote

perfect white elephant if you hate his parents lzozlkzozl

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:36:31 AM EDT

[#24]

"The Accommodator".

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:37:46 AM EDT

[#25]

Ugly Christmas Sweater

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:48:30 AM EDT

[#26]

Six pack of cheap canned beer, a pack of smokes and some lottery tickets.

A snuggie

Ron Popeil pocket fisherman. Do they even make them anymore?

Well, hell, just about any of the as seen on TVtype things are usually good , especially if it's one of those things that isn't particularly useful.

Quoted:
I always stock up on good old classic fishing reels from yard sales. My gifts at those things are a good way to find out who is a regular guy and who is a meterosexual.

View Quote

Fishing is boring. I'd guess you'd call me metro unless you brought hunting stuff . . . which reminds me. Other good white elephant gifts for the cubicle set:

Doe in estrus scents, buck bombs, butt out tool, cover scents, etc.

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:50:52 AM EDT

[#27]

Live lobster with no claw restraints.

The more aggressive the better.

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:51:44 AM EDT

[#28]

A can of WD-40.

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:53:41 AM EDT

[#29]

Blockbuster gift card.

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:53:48 AM EDT

[#30]

Fifth of Rumpleminze

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:55:02 AM EDT

[#31]

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:57:13 AM EDT

[#32]

Box of chocolates.

Open box, take bite out of each chocolate.

Posted: 11/21/2013 6:59:06 AM EDT

[#33]

Quote History

Quoted:
Shake weight

View Quote

THIS! I did it last Christmas. It was the hit of the party. Everyone wanted their picture taken with it.

Posted: 11/21/2013 7:00:22 AM EDT

[#34]

Whatever you do, DO NOT find a Rock and paint it White.

Don't do it. People will think yer a cheap bastad.

Posted: 11/21/2013 7:03:49 AM EDT

[#35]

I don't beleive in the "white elephant" crap. You can come up with a gift that is funny but still useful.

I usually buy those sampler 6-packs of imported beers.

Posted: 11/21/2013 7:14:16 AM EDT

[#36]

The best laugh we got was one year my uncle got a hair styling kit. The next year, he got a hair dryer.

He's bald.

Posted: 11/21/2013 7:38:31 AM EDT

[#37]

The first time I did white elephant, I had no idea how much of a joke the gift needed to be. I ended up getting half a box of Kleenex and taped 3 Carl's Jr. BBQ sauces to it. Needless to say, my friend wasn't too happy when he ended up with it.

The next time I went with a toilet seat. It's cheap, and people can actually use it or regift. Plus it's pretty funny.

Posted: 11/21/2013 7:40:09 AM EDT

[#38]

A bottle of deer pee.

Posted: 11/21/2013 7:50:04 AM EDT

[#39]

i got toilet paper last year.....i don't think the guy fully understood what a white elephant is. We won't be making that mistake this year.

ETA: ok it turns out what our office calls White Elephant is more Dirty Santa.

Posted: 11/21/2013 7:56:37 AM EDT

[#40]

Tenga egg

Posted: 11/21/2013 7:59:31 AM EDT

[#41]

when i first married my wife, I got an Old Spice Soap on a Rope gift as a white elephant. That was twenty years ago.

I got the same box again last year from someone else in the family.

Apparently that damn thing has been making the rounds since the mid 80's.

I'd go with that.

Posted: 11/21/2013 8:00:29 AM EDT

[#42]

Posted: 11/21/2013 8:02:34 AM EDT

[#43]

Quote History

Quoted:

Ugly Christmas Sweater

View Quote

I am tempted to buy that sweater and wear it on Christmas day

Posted: 11/21/2013 8:03:40 AM EDT

[#44]

Quote History

Quoted:
If memory serves, there are THREE types of gift exchanges:

White elephant - bad gift
Secret Santa- good gift

And

Dirty Santa - any kind of gift but you draw numbers or determine a draw order. You randomly pick a gift and open it. If you don't like it, you have the option of taking a gift from someone that has opened an earlier gift you like better and giving them yours. The last person to pick has the best position as they can pick from any of the previously opened gifts.

View Quote

I thought that was when some homeless mall Santa wipes turd on your upper lib with his pecker?

Posted: 11/21/2013 8:07:30 AM EDT

[#45]

The weirdest most useless tool from Harbor Freight you can think of.

It seems like it's nice at first, but then unless the person is a big workshop/gearhead kind of person, it'll be "WTF do I do with this?" But it'll be too nice to just throw out, because it's all "new" and in the box etc.

And if by chance the person IS a big gearhead, well, it still kind of sucks because it's just a Harbor Freight tool.

http://www.harborfreight.com/3-jaw-pilot-bearing-puller-4876.html