Quoted:
We've had good ones and bad ones but never with any consistency. What's the secret for picking a good, sweet watermelon?
You can't "pick" a good one. It's a wives tale. I used to work in a produce department. I would get stupid women asking me this 100 times a day. I would try to educate them, and then finally, all us produce guys decided that women were not able to be educated. Women argue with you when you try to give them facts and truth. It was easier to pretend you were picking out a good one for them, make it look like you were going through some process, so you could shut her the FLOCK up and get her the HELL out of your face (working w/ the public causes pissy attitudes like this).
When we would cut watermelons to put plastic wrap on them, of course we would try to pick a better one, but it's impossible. Using all of our powers of divination occasionally failed and we had to throw it out.
I've heard it all. I've heard the B.S. about "thumping" them. I've heard the B.S. about "bee stings" (black dried sugar that is on the outside). It's all B.S. These corporate watermelon farmers know how to get most of their crop edible.
Helen Keller is just as likely to pick out a watermelon as any produce worker.