Warning

 

Close

Confirm Action

Are you sure you wish to do this?

Confirm Cancel
BCM
User Panel

Posted: 5/22/2017 8:46:21 AM EDT
Any Texas members foster kids?

My wife and I are thinking about it and we are curious about a few things.

A few basics, We have 3 kids (8 year old boy, 4 year old girl, 1 year old boy), 2200 square foot 4 bedroom house.

From our understanding we can specify a girl 5 and younger to foster, is this correct?

Best agency to use in the DFW area?

How long did it take you do all the paperwork and get approved?

One of the requirements is a working telephone, does that include a cell phone or do i actually need a land line?

Looks like i need to do a background check on my 16 year old babysitter too, am i reading that correctly?

Do i really have to store my ammo separate from my firearms?

Feel free to give any advice you may have too.
Link Posted: 5/22/2017 9:57:48 AM EDT
[#1]
Why?

You appear to already have too much on your plate so I recommend reconsidering when the kids are much older.
Link Posted: 5/22/2017 10:27:08 AM EDT
[#2]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Why?

You appear to already have too much on your plate so I recommend reconsidering when the kids are much older.
View Quote
Honestly, it's have another kid of our own, or help someone in need.  My kids are good and easy going and I've been really blessed.   I'd like to help some innocent kid that needs a little help.
Link Posted: 5/22/2017 3:25:40 PM EDT
[#3]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


Honestly, it's have another kid of our own, or help someone in need.  My kids are good and easy going and I've been really blessed.   I'd like to help some innocent kid that needs a little help.
View Quote
Some of these younger kids can have some serious issues so incorporating them into such a young family might not be the best thing.  How will you explain to your small children when the foster child is removed?  Are they prepared?  I'm sure CPS will have the same questions for you.

I did this as a teenager and was effectively the parent in many cases.  I had extensive interviews and blood testing done but was never asked about firearms.
Link Posted: 5/24/2017 5:28:57 PM EDT
[#4]
Quoted:
Any Texas members foster kids?

My wife and I are thinking about it and we are curious about a few things.

A few basics, We have 3 kids (8 year old boy, 4 year old girl, 1 year old boy), 2200 square foot 4 bedroom house.

From our understanding we can specify a girl 5 and younger to foster, is this correct?

Best agency to use in the DFW area?

How long did it take you do all the paperwork and get approved?

One of the requirements is a working telephone, does that include a cell phone or do i actually need a land line?

Looks like i need to do a background check on my 16 year old babysitter too, am i reading that correctly?

Do i really have to store my ammo separate from my firearms?

Feel free to give any advice you may have too.
View Quote


I have the most respect for families who choose to foster.  That said, you really need to think long and hard about this since you have young kids.  I represent kids in these cases and they are often very damaged.   It's just the sad truth.  

Having some of these kids around your young family can be dangerous.  And you just don't know when you first get them.  In the last few months I have had two kids pulled out of foster homes with other children for sexually inappropriate  behavior.  These were both young kids, a 6 year old boy and a 5 year old girl.   ETA, the kids were the perpetrators to be clear.  

I commend you for wanting to foster but I would tell you to wait until your kids are much, much older.  

PM me if you have specific questions, sorry I can't answer about the requirements, not my role.
Link Posted: 5/28/2017 3:11:42 PM EDT
[#5]
I would find an agency and take the required classes. I can't remember it all now but I was probably 6 or 8 classes that we had to take in the evenings and weekends. I went through Arrow ministries in Houston. I applaud you for considering foster care because there are so many kids that need placement. By the time you finish taking the classes you will know if this is something you will want to do. When CPS came and spoke they didn't sugar coat anything because if it doesn't work out that have to remove that child from your home and place them somewhere else. The classes were good and we took them over the course of about 4 or 5 months. At the end you will apply for a license to foster and CPS or the agency will conduct a home inspection. The home inspection is very thorough and its you will likely have to make some changes. For instance, the childs medication must be inaccesible to them and locked. Also you have to keep a log of their medication and when you administer the dosages. They did ask for an inventory of my weapons along with serial numbers. The will want any weapons secured in some type of safe. My inventory was extensive and it wasn't an issue. 

Having said all of that taking in CPS kids can be the most rewarding thing you've ever done or a complete nightmare. If you foster, you can ask for preference on age range and sex but that doesn't guarantee anything. You might get a call at 2am and they will ask can you take in a 1 year old and you might not know anything about that child other than race, sex, age. That child could be a physical abuse case, neglect, sexual abuse, have learning disabilities, mental illenes have extensive medical issues, etc. The end goal of foster care....ideally....is to place that child back into the home with a parent or a relative. Sometimes, it can happen and a lot of times it wont. If you find a child that you've become attached to and has become a part of the family and been with you for several years... they can be returned to their family. Just remember thats the end goal of this whole process. 

Like the previous posters have mentioned you can likely get a kid thats been sexually abused and they might try to replicate those actions on your bio kids. Once again the classes teach you how to deal with this specific issue. There is no "alone" time with your foster and your bio kids. All play is out in the open and no play time is done anywhere without an adult in the. Basically you watch them like a hawk 24/7 and privacy isn't an option unless they're bathing or using the bathroom.

If you're interested, I say start taking the classes. They are the most helpful part of the decision making process. 
Link Posted: 5/29/2017 1:51:41 PM EDT
[#6]
My wife and I have been foster parents for 2 years this month. We just received our 10th placement a week ago today. We're dual licensed (Foster/Adopt). We have 3 bio kids (8,5,3) and currently have 3 placements (4,4,2). We're with Covenant Kids.

To answer some questions:

There are some good agencies in the area, we've been very happy with CK and our case worker has been awesome, she really advocates for us with CPS, when needed.

Training took us about 3.5 months but we were on the ball getting stuff done. Most people in our first class finished in 5-6 months. You will be background checked, they will want a list of babysitters, they will also need to be fingerprinted/background checked. Yes, guns (locked up) and ammo (stored separately) and locked up. My gun safe is in my office and I have ammo in a storage cabinet locked in office and garage. What my wife and I do with our carry and HD weapons is our prerogative.

Yes, you can indicate your age range/sex/race etc. We do not take kids with sexual abuse history or as reason for removal. We have only take younger kids. Stated newborn to 2 yrs and are now 2yrs to 6 yrs, any race, any sex. You can also select which level of care, basic, modified or specialized. Most kids coming into foster care will do so as basic and will get leveled, if necessary while they're with you. We had one kid, our first placement, who was a very tough kid, I think most would have put in a 30 day notice with her. She busted my youngest daughter's nose twice. We stuck with her, and with CK advocated for therapies, which she got and in a few short her behavior dramatically improved. She was barely two when she came to us and 10 months later went to live with her grandparents as a very different 3 year old girl.

Foster care is tough, most don't understand it. It's hard. I spent 8 years in the Marine Corps as a grunt, and there are many days that I'd much rather be stuck in Iraq again, running missions, gun fights and sweating my balls off. It was easier. We had a kid come to us whose 3 year old brother was killed by mom and dad. You get kids who are damaged or at best, underdeveloped. We've yet to get a kid who either, did not have drugs in their system or significantly under developed. Our almost two year old just learned to walk last month. Still cannot say a word.

But, when you see these kids improve, you see the fruits of your labor. At the end of the day, there are kids who need a home, need someone to love them and protect them, if only for a small period of time.

Our kids have done well when our foster kiddos have left. They still talk about them and want them to come over to play. Sure, they've been sad, our oldest has questioned why we do this. But for us, it's the opportunity to share the Gospel, God's love, and allow them to grow. My family, marriage and kids, are better for it.

A quote I came across when I was considering putting in a 30 day notice on our first placement and being done "Your no will be harder on them than your yes will ever be on you". It put things in perspective for me.

If you're in the DFW area I'd be happy to meet up with you and answer any additional questions you might have or, get our wives together as well. We feel strongly about foster care and we're an open book. It's tested our marriage (high school sweethearts and 10 years married in June) it's tested me as a man, father and Christ follower. But, it's absolutely been worth it.

Shoot me a IM/email if you want to get together/have any additional questions.
Close Join Our Mail List to Stay Up To Date! Win a FREE Membership!

Sign up for the ARFCOM weekly newsletter and be entered to win a free ARFCOM membership. One new winner* is announced every week!

You will receive an email every Friday morning featuring the latest chatter from the hottest topics, breaking news surrounding legislation, as well as exclusive deals only available to ARFCOM email subscribers.


By signing up you agree to our User Agreement. *Must have a registered ARFCOM account to win.
Top Top