I am wanting to load up some mild 9mm loads for a revolver for my sister who is almost 70yoa.  I would like her to try the 9mm revolver with reduced loads to begin with to see if she can handle that recoil.
Has anyone reloaded 9mm "lite" for revolvers?
It's a Ruger LCR 9mm so the frame is light and I want to lighten the felt recoil for her.  since it's a revolver I really don't have to worry about cycling the action

So has anyone done this and/or can anyone give me some of there starting points?

I will be working with 115gr bullets.

Thanks
SS33

It's basically 38sw or 38pl, for 9mm cartridges.  Bullet diameter is identical, just adjust load for case volume, and maybe front-stuff with wadding to prevent detonations.

I have both the .38SPL and 9mm Ruger LCR.  The 9mm is a heavier gun even though they are both almost exactly the same size.  The felt recoil on the 9mm is by far much harsher than the .38 for standard factory loads.  I don't reload, but I have had the experience with Blazer Brass 9mm, where the unfired bullets in the cylinder have come out of their casings due to the recoil of the fired rounds.  You'll have to be careful how you crimp the casing.

I agree, that loading the round lighter will help your sister get used to the gun easier.  My LCR is not really fun to shoot with the heavy double action trigger (shrouded hammer) and the harsh recoil.   Very hard to overcome the flinch demon with that gun.  But it's very concealable and a good short range shooter if you can master it.  It's my wife' gun, and she got pretty good with it.  It took a lot of rounds down range for her to get there, but she is really a great shot with it now inside 30 feet.

ETA: Corected auto-correct...  LOL

115 grain FMJ Bullets
Bullseye Pistol Powder
1.13" COAL
9mm cases
Any small pistol primer

4.8 grains:  most data maximum load

4.5 grains:  European or NATO power

4.1 grains:  American power standard loading power

3.5 grains:  The least powder that will reliably operate a broken in Glock.  A real pussy cat, but functions each Glock its been tried in.

Nothing lighter will work.

Hornady makes a 100 grain pink box light 9mm loading that is the mildest factory thing going.

At low velocities, bullet weight has a greater effect on felt recoil than does velocity, so look at sub-100 gr bullets for the .380 or some of the cast designs intended for Cowboy Action Derringer events.
A .380-level recipe should do nicely, but you can go even lower with 1.5 gr of Red Dot and a .360" diameter roundball thumb-seated in the sized case. Squirt some LEE liquid Alox around the roundball at the case mouth and let dry.

I agree with the above.  You could create some pretty soft-shooting 9mm loads, and that would help, but I think the 9mm LCR isn't the best choice for a recoil sensitive shooter.  If you can swing it, I'd recommend picking up a used model 10 and some 38spl target loads or even some 38 short colt. I've introduced a few people to shooting with a 686 and wadcuters, and it's been easily handled by everyone that tried.

Problem is she has to have a lite weight frame.  Since it's a revolver there is no slide to function.  38spl would be a better choice but don't own one and don't want one. Don't need another caliber to take care of.  I decided against gearing up to make lite 9mm loads since it would be really a waste of my time for just her shooting my 9mm and I wouldn't be reloading for her all the time.
I'm going to try to find a 38spl I can borrow and get some lite ammo.
I won't shoot lead bullets in anything. I hate how they foul barrels. 90 gr Critical Defense 38spl if I can find it for her to shoot would be good and find a 38 revolver I can borrow.
I have a couple buddies that I can maybe borrow one for a week or so to let her try it out.
9mm I may let her shoot my 9mm with critical Defense Lite 100gr and see how she likes it.
She told me the recoil wasn't an issue for her, but gun weight was.
I want her to have a positive experience shooting and have a positive feeling about here choice of revolvers and hope that will lead her to shoot it more often.

vv data

Looks like about 3.9 to 4.5 grains of n320.

I have a Charter Arms .38 special, snub nose, 2" barrel (Ithink, its pretty short). A bunch of years ago I traded a stack of once fored .30-06, and .308 brass for two bags of .38 special target loads, which I don't remember what it was, all I remember is that it was all wadcutters, and almost no recoil. I once shot all five rounds into a tree from a range of about7-8 feet, and 3 of the 5 bounced off and hit me, doing no damage. The other 2 I could see sticking out of the bark. Not exactly a SD load, wadcutter filled most of the case. But boy, was the recoil mild! I've never shot anything else in the gun, but I do have a few boxes of semi-wadcutters for it, and a few boxes of .38 S&W that will also fit. Contrary to most thought, .38 S&W isn't anything to sneeze at, with a 146 gr LRN bullet its okay. But everybody wants maximum performance out of everything these days.

Aside from your ammo concerns it is WELL recognized lightweight snubs are a very poor choice for women shooters or beginners. They call them experts guns for a reason.
In 38's old target wad cutters were a good choice
In 9mm reload the lightest load you can find ( modern manuals tend to list max only where a lot of older manuals will list minimums which is where to start )
In small revolvers I always suggest the all steel with a three inch barrel ( better sight radius less recoil full length ejection all are very helpful for new  shooters

To the bold:  Absolutely.  If you are going to start someone with a revolver, a three or four inch K frame Smith or comparable sized Ruger is the way to go.  Snubbies will turn many a new shooter totally off.

To the italicized:  I hear this a lot, and in a ideal (well, as near as ideal as you can get, give the that true ideal means you have no pressing need for a firearm,) encounter maybe they are a good thing......but I have been in an actual gunfight armed with a .38 revolver shooting wad cutters, and they were stopped by the front glass windows (and not armored glass either) of a Popeye's.   Windows that were quite handily penetrated by 9mm rounds fired at us from the other side.  I realize that most folks needing a defensive firearm aren't all that likely to need to shoot through glass, but take it into consideration anyway.