Wife is not a gun person.  She used to shoot a little trap with me but gave it up for bowling years ago.  12 ga. recoil was too much for her.

With the recent events she has started to think about a CCW permit.  I should note - I don't carry.  I've taken a class and I shoot regularly, handgun, rifle, shotgun, I've just never felt compelled to carry.  I'm rethinking that and may turn in the paperwork sometime soon.  

Anyway, back on topic, I find myself having to teach her about handguns, calibers, striker fired, hammer fired, condition 1, etc,etc,etc.  There is a lot she just doesn't know.  I know I need to get her to the range and let her at least shoot some of my handguns and possibly try out some others ( there are no indoor ranges around and no rental shops, so its pretty much borrow something from someone).  I have a friend on the local PD that teaches a CCW class that she's indicated she'd like to sign up for.  I've taken this class, good class - but mostly laws and regulations - not so much defense shooting and hardware.  I have a P226 full size and sig 320 SC in 9mm she can try, I don't think she would enjoy shooting the .45's or the 10mm.  

I'm thinking of guiding her to a compact, striker fired pistol, with a thumb safety, like a M&P 9c.   I'm thinking thumb safety because of concerns with loose clothing, loose items in a purse, etc, that could activate a trigger safety.  I know that the thumb safety on a striker fired pistol is pretty much scorned by people with training, and lots of carry time, but the wife does not currently fit that description.  I have a G20 I bought to carry with me as a woods gun.  I keep an empty chamber in it because I don't really trust myself holstering the gun with heavy clothing, and gear on.  It just seems too easy to get something hung up in the trigger guard especially when you can't see what you're doing.

Thoughts? Other options?

Good responses in here. I asked the same thing yesterday. Long story short take her to a range and let her try a bunch

http://www.ar15.com/forums/t_1_5/1815688_Help_me_pick_a_9mm_for_the_wife.html&page=1

Thanks, I actually did read some of that thread yesterday.  Good information all around.

I'm wondering about my thinking on a thumb safety.  From the loose clothing and purse gear standpoint it makes sense to me to add a level of safety (engineer - I like belts and suspenders.)

OTOH, perhaps thats just compensation for bad practice?  i.e.  always carry the gun in a proper holster (i.e. protected trigger, rigid holster) and never, ever unholster unless you mean business.  Then holstering the gun anywhere but in the morning when you're in a less stressed environment with no obstructions to get in the way will never be an issue.

Sam concern I had - Probably more of a preference thing if you have a good holster. Still makes me nervous at times but I am probably over the top about it

Guiding her to use a striker is a good idea, but just as I mentioned in the other thread, let her pick or she will never carry it. Make sure she tries an XDS, single stack glocks, and the Shield to give her a fair and impartial way of finding something for her.

Short story but I have a friend that's a 1911 guy and was adamant about his wife carrying a Defender. She hates it. She hated it so much that she stopped shooting it and avoided range trips because she knew she would be forced to shoot it from pressure. I got her to come out with my lady and she instantly fell in love with my 320c

There's now a 320 with every combination of slides and frame sizes there for her, but she has a well used 320c now...but we had to grind the takedown lever like I did with mine to keep it from eating my thumb during recoil.

Nothing wrong with a manual safety if that is what YOU prefer. Just learn to manipulate it without hesitation. If you ever need your gun precious milliseconds are going to count. You cannot spend time thinking about flipping levers. It just needs to happen. That comes with lots of practice.
Personally I don't like manual safeties. I carry a DA/SA Sig and the heavier DA trigger pull along with keeping my finger off the trigger is the safety.
My wife likes a manual safety. Like I said its all personal preference. Just learn to use whatever you choose.

Whatever gun you choose just make sure your comfortable carrying with 1 in the chamber.
Please don't think your going to have time to rack the slide when / if you ever need it.
I'm amazed at how many people carry a gun for protection unloaded.

My wife likes both the Shield and G43. Be aware there are kydex covers you can get that cover the trigger guard area for safety but pull off with a short cord when drawn. Like a Dale Fricke Zacchaeus. link

That is interesting.  I did not know there was such a thing.   Looks like a good idea.

Double post.

They work well for compromise situations where you are sticking a gun in a purse because of convenience (on body carry should always be preferred) but you need the trigger covered for safety. Also works to "Mexican carry" (stuck in the waistband without a holster. Also not preferred but that's life.

No woman should just be throwing her pistol into her purse. BAD, bad idea. There are two ways to purse carry. You can put pistol in a clip-on holster in a regular purse, with holster clipped to a pocket inside, but that's got to be sturdy. Or a dedicated CCW purse with a separate compartment for pistol, with a holster. I like the ones from Gun Tote'n Mamas.

There's two ways, alright. Bad ways and much worse ways.

With my wife, at this point, it's carry in her existing purse or diaper bag or not at all. The cover lets her do that safely. Maybe eventually we'll get to a better way.

Baaaahhhhhhhh



If she carries properly in a holster, none of that is a concern.

I think you need additional training

She should shoot several guns and SHE should choose what she prefers.  

Went down to the fun store today to just handle a few guns.  She seemed to like the sig p238 or the p938, she didn't particularly care for the fit of the S&W m&p.  I didn't notice a g43 at that store.

I had not really been considering a .380acp, but of the guns we tried the various .380's seemed to fit her hand best.  i'd prefer a 9mm, but a .380 in her immediate control is better than a 9mm at home in the safe.

We'll have to try to find time to go to the range and get an idea of how she handles recoil.

Went to another fun store today and handled a few more.  The G43 seemed to fit her hand well.  Looked at the small HK, but it's a beast compared to the others.

I wish we had an indoor range around here.  She isn't enthusiastic about shooting in the snow.

I do have a friend that CCW's a ruger .380.  He said we'd be welcome to try it out.  Hopefully we can try that and my P320 and get some idea of how she handles recoil.  

Just on fit and feel it seems to be between a g43 and a P938. (or G42/P238) if she doesn't like the recoil.

Sounds like you guys are right on track :)


My ex wife finally got on board with my gun addiction and asked me to get her a gun.  At the time I was a glock guy so I let her try a few of my different glocks just to get a little perspective.  She hated the look of Glocks and demanded a cute, stainless snubby.  I stupidly dropped the money for a S&W 640 (a fine gun dont get me wrong, but not for a woman to CCW) and she LOVED how pretty it was.  A few weeks later I finally get her on a range and after one shot she decides she doesnt actually like it lol.  I hand her one of my Glock 19s just so she will have something to do and she fell in love with it.  She Ended up just keeping that one and making me have to promote one of my backup 19s to be my primary lol.  

Its not fair to say women do that.  EVERYBODY thats new to shooting goes through a learning curve like that.  It sounds like your wife isn't a total beginner with your old days shooting clays, but handguns are very different. But again, it sounds like shes a smart lady and is gonna pick a perfect gun for herself.  I hope you and your wife both enjoy your CCW licenses OP!

Well, we'll see how it goes.  She's getting a G42 for Christmas.  I finally elected the .380 to minimize the recoil.  If it goes well and she decides she wants more bam we can look at 9's later.  This should do to get her feet wet and give her the opportunity to shoot and train.   I have 9's she can use once she is comfortable with the .380.

I wouldn't call a jframe terrible for a woman to CCW, my wife carries one.

I think that probably a good move. I've been debating getting a G42 for my wife for the same reasons. So far she hasn't minded 9mm recoil though so it will probably be a G43.

NM late to the party.

Husband gifted me with a G26 three years ago.   I currently carry a P238.  I prefer its external safety and lighter recoil.  I also find it easer to conceal IWB.  The IWB holster I use most often is the one made by The Well Armed Woman.  Good luck!

460 s&w

Maybe next year

glock 19 or similar quality sized 9mm

OP, I'm going through a similar situation with my wife.  She's had her carry permit for almost four years, but never really felt the inclination to carry until recently.  I just bought her a G42 for Christmas, along with the Vickers base plate extensions, because she wanted more grip to hang onto.  And I picked her up a holster from the Well Armed Woman that SHE picked out, because if she doesn't like the holster, she's not going to carry it, and that defeats the purpose.  Good luck!

PM Sent.

as stated if possible hit a range that rents handguns and have her try a few that fit/feel correct for her.
My wife has tried the 9mm family of Walther CCP, M&P, Glock 26, SCCY CPX, Kel Tec.
She decided on the Glock 26.

If not spend some time with her at the gun store and get the best feel for her.
Good luck

Well first trip to the range today for the G42, a little cold and windy with 8 - 10" of snow on the ground.  She did really well.  We shot about 2 boxes out of it and towards the end she was pretty much knocking the center out of the target.  I was pretty happy.   Recoil isn't an issue - but she is either soft gripping it or limp wristing it a little.  She was getting maybe one jamb / failure to eject per mag.   I ran 2 mags through it and had no issues.  The first few mags she had her gloves on and I think her left thumb was riding the slide a bit.  Things improved for her as she got more accustomed to all that was going on and took her gloves off.   I had her shoot one magazine through my 320sc, the recoil didn't bother her, but she did notice it being more recoil.   I think for a first gun I'm glad we went with the .380.  She can get something with more wambo latter when she is more comfortable and proficient.

Thanks for the help all.

My wife seems to prefer revolvers so I bought her an LCR 357 is using .38spl though we fired a few 357 rounds at the range just to experience the recoil.

If your are helping direct her, keep in mind micro .380's while not a "man stopper power house" cartridge are very snappy and not very fun to shoot a lot of rounds though. I love my LCP, but I don't just wake up and want to go put a box of ammo though it either. IMO for a lot of females the BIGGER .380's that offer more to grip are a good option.

ETA: just noticed the original post date...Oh well, looks like you two got it under control.

My wife carries a 4 inch S&W Model 681 with Crimson Trace grips loaded with Remington .38 Special +P 125 grain SJHP ammunition. Always let the woman pick out her own gun!

you should have her take a class..she needs to have someone else teach her (e teaching relatives/SOs aint the best idea most of the time)

Glock 19 or SW MP

20ga shotgun is the way to go if you go the shotgun route

Always let her pick the gun and never choose it for her or it will remain unused and despised.

And there are way too many good options besides those two pistols, all just as reliable too. Again, let her decide.