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Indoors both supers and subs are plenty loud. I fear trying to find good subs comparable to something like 110gr black tip will be an exercise akin to pissing up a rope.
You do you, but I'd encourage you to just accept that guns are loud indoors, get Barnes 110gr, and be done with it.
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This is right on. In HD, your goal is to stop the fight. Protecting hearing is important, but secondary to ending the threat. To protect ears of others, keep bedroom doors closed. That will help them some (probably at your expense). Use a muzzle device that throws concussion forward, or a suppresor if you can afford one.
Picking a less effective round to stop a fight because you're worried about your ears is bad logic.
IF you can find tested ammo that performs as well as black tip, rock on. I don't think you'll be able to, though. Dr. Gary Roberts has some good ideas about ammo if you want to look him up (DOCGKR)