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Posted: 12/9/2001 7:33:29 PM EDT
There are just so many - practically everything they ever said was hilarious but here's a couple of choice ones: "We've got lumps of it 'round the back" "Oh, I think I've wet 'em!" "My hovercraft is full of eels." "Venezuelan beaver cheese?" "Oh. I thought WE were the Popular Front of Judea." "If we took the bones out, it wouldn't be crunchy, would it?"
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 7:36:02 PM EDT
"tis just a flesh wound!" No_Expert
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 7:36:28 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/9/2001 7:29:51 PM EDT by Ice]
"I've soiled my armor!" "Broads lying in ponds passing out swords is no basis for a stable form of government." "Come see the violence inherent in the system! Help, help, I am being repressed." "See turned me into a newt!... I got better."
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 7:37:00 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 7:37:25 PM EDT
Something about the crunchy frogs being "lightly killed." -------- I work for Confuse a Cat.
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 7:38:06 PM EDT
'Know what I mean, nudge, nudge, know what I mean?!' 'A wink is as good as a nod to a blind man.' 'Your wife, I mean is she a bit of a sport?' Eric The('SayNoMore,SayNoMore')Hun[>]:)]
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 7:38:33 PM EDT
"Go away before I taunt you a second time!"
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 7:38:56 PM EDT
Heh-since I have all of the original scripts, it will be fun to count the misqoutes-I see 3 of them right now... My fave? "Come and see the violence inherent in the system! Help, help, I'm being repressed!"
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 7:46:39 PM EDT
Then correct it, mister fancy pants. Otherwise, bugger off.
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 8:01:34 PM EDT
"That parrot is bleeding deceased! It is an EX-parrot!"
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 8:02:08 PM EDT
"Your arm's off!" "No it's not!"
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 8:03:57 PM EDT
"Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries"
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 8:07:52 PM EDT
He's pining. Pining for the fjords.
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 8:31:32 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/9/2001 8:25:14 PM EDT by Atencio]
Pilate: I will not have my fwends widiculed by the common soldiewy. Anybody else feel like a little giggul. When I mention my fwend Biggus ...Dickus.
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 8:33:43 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 8:34:18 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 8:38:00 PM EDT
"Bring Out Your Dead" "Let us taunt it! It may become so cross that it will make a mistake."
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 8:40:30 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 8:47:31 PM EDT
"Don't give me that, you snotty-faced heap of parrot droppings! Shut your festering gobutet! Your type really makes me puke, you vacuous, coffee-nosed malodorous PERVERT!"
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 8:55:22 PM EDT
No one expects the Spanish Inquisition!
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 9:40:05 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 9:46:19 PM EDT
"Is it behind the bunny rabbit????" "No, It IS the Bunny Rabbit!!!"
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 9:52:31 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 9:53:29 PM EDT
"I'm not dead yet......I feel better!"
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 10:00:30 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 10:06:28 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 10:13:32 PM EDT
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 10:25:51 PM EDT
I never did think that slapstick shit was funny. I'll bet you about died watching the Airplane series....huh? And what about the Police Academy crap? Now Friends....that's funny :)
Link Posted: 12/9/2001 10:45:47 PM EDT
"Yes, well, that's the sort of blinkered, philistine pig ignorance I've come to expect from you non-creative garbage. You sit there on your loathsome, spotty behinds squeezing blackheads, not caring a tinker's cuss for the struggling artist, you excrement! You whining, hypocritical toadies, with your colour TV sets and your Tony Jacklin golf clubs and your bleeding masonic secret handshakes! You wouldn't let me join, would you, you blackballing bastards! Well, I wouldn't become a freemason now if you went down on your lousy, stinking knees and begged me!"
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 3:24:51 AM EDT
"Luxury!" and the whole skit it came from.
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 3:38:09 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/10/2001 3:31:42 AM EDT by MC_Man]
The song where the minstrel was singing about Sir Robin's cowardice... "And Sir Robin bravely ran away..." And... "She's a witch... she's a witch!" And Yes, gunluvr, we thought Airplane! was funny, as well as the Naked Gun series. The first Police Academy was OK, but went downhill from there.
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 4:52:18 AM EDT
"And finally, monsieur, a wafer-thin mint." "No." "Oh sir! It's only a tiny little thin one."
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 4:57:07 AM EDT
"What makes you think she is a witch?" "Oh, she turned me into a newt!" "A newt?" "I got better...."
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 5:07:28 AM EDT
Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is not a basis for government....... to wield supreme executive power requires a mandate from the masses, not participation in some farcical aquatic ceremony [NI]
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 5:08:42 AM EDT
It's NOT a palendrome! The palendrome of Bolton would be Notlob! I am not prepared to persue my line of inquiry any further as I feel it has gotten too silly!
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 5:10:55 AM EDT
"Oh, paratroops eh? Be a shame if someone were to set fire to them." "Cardinal Fang, bring out....the comfy chair!" "More beans!" "He became convinced that he was being followed by a giant hedgehog named Spiny Norman."
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 5:17:18 AM EDT
[size=6]DINSDALE??[/size=6]
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 5:57:21 AM EDT
(high-class restaurant) -"And what would you like, sir?" -"I'll have a whiskey." -"For first course, sir?" -"Aye." -"And for main course, sir?" -"Eh, I'll have a whiskey for main course. And a whiskey for pudding." -(pause) "I see. And what would you like to drink with that, sir? A whiskey?" -"No, a bottle of wine."
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 6:14:33 AM EDT
Bridge Keeper:"STOP! What is your name?" Arthur:"Arthur, King of the Britons." Bridge Keeper:"What is your quest?" Arthur:"To seek the Holy Grail." Bridge Keeper:"What is the airspeed velocity of an unladened swallow?" Arthur:"African or European?" Bridge Keeper:"What...I don't know that..." (yells as he is cast into the Pit of Despair)
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 6:24:15 AM EDT
"It's not really very silly, is it?" "We have Spam, eggs, sausage and Spam. Spam, Spam, baked beans, sausage and Spam. Spam, Spam, Spam, eggs, and Spam. Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, bacon, sausage and Spam." "Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!" "If I had claimed supreme executive power just because some watery tart lobbed a scimitar at me? They'd put me away!" "Ooooh!, Mrs. Nigerbaters exploded!" "Oh Mother don't be so sentimental. Things explode all the time."
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 6:25:39 AM EDT
"You can't [b]have[/b] babies." "Don't you oppress me!"
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 6:25:47 AM EDT
"Who wants to go marching up and down the square with the Sgt. Major?" "Squad! ...wait for it!"
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 6:35:04 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/10/2001 8:14:50 AM EDT by MIerinMD]
"This is supposed to be a happy occasion. Let's not bicker and argue about who killed who." "Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate?" "It's not a matter of where he GRIPS it.." (I like the way he says it)
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 7:10:05 AM EDT
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 7:23:41 AM EDT
I don't know if I have a favorite line anymore. I worked on the MOL to long. I really wish I had the goat love page so I could post it here. That is funny. You can't turn down the sound. After we got it in for testing, I sent it to a few people and got really nasty e-mails back from the poor guys that sit in cubes. The worst blasting e-mails came back from the women I sent it to. Or the whole Lumber Jack song.
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 7:32:10 AM EDT
where here on the quest for the holy grail,the holy grail we already got one. you already got one?
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 7:44:59 AM EDT
"and this is the machine that goes ping. *ping*" "You are all dead ....." "It was the Salmon Moose" "but i didnt even have the salmon moose"
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 7:49:58 AM EDT
"then when I woke up this morning, one sock too many" "It's merely a flesh wound." "You've got to haggle." "And get the Machine that goes BING."
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 8:44:50 AM EDT
My fave and I use it restaurants often Look at the menu and say "I'll 'ave the lot!" Also, "he said blessed are the cheesemakers?" "He's a what?" "A jew, a himey, a kike, a hooknose, a Red sea pedestrian"
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 12:32:59 PM EDT
Oh, damn, there are so many: "GONE...such a woody word." "I was just, uhh, test firing." "Dis is da middle of de film!" "Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate?!" "Oh, fishy, fishy, fishy, fishy...were is the fishy?" "...And it went wherever I didn't go." (line is funnier with the empahsis.) "A mosquito stole my leg when I was sleeping!" "Freedom on the left, execution to the right."
Link Posted: 12/10/2001 12:54:38 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Nimrod1193: "Yes, well, that's the sort of blinkered, philistine pig ignorance I've come to expect from you non-creative garbage. You sit there on your loathsome, spotty behinds squeezing blackheads, not caring a tinker's cuss for the struggling artist, you excrement! You whining, hypocritical toadies, with your colour TV sets and your Tony Jacklin golf clubs and your bleeding masonic secret handshakes! You wouldn't let me join, would you, you blackballing bastards! Well, I wouldn't become a freemason now if you went down on your lousy, stinking knees and begged me!"
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I've got a second hand apron...
Thank you...
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I nearly got in at Hendon..
Thank you...
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Right... who's next on the list? Well..there's the Spanish Inquisition! :^O
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