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Posted: 11/7/2001 1:21:37 PM EST
It's a long involved story, but I'll keep it short... My exwife is seeing a guy that has child rape charges pending against him, one of them being from my daughter. He has been arraigned 3 times on 3 different sets of charges, and has a restraining order against him having contact with ANY minor children. My daughter just came back to me (I have custody) and was telling me how they did all this stuff with my ex's boyfriend. My question is, what do I do now... It seems what ever I do, nothing happens. I am getting to my whits end. This guy has abused my daughter, and I am helpless.
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 1:50:16 PM EST
[Last Edit: 11/7/2001 1:59:05 PM EST by BlackDog714]
Anyone have any suggestions????
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 2:40:08 PM EST
He can be arrested for breaking the restraining order. I would go to the courthouse and talk to the court facilitator or anybody else that will listen. People like this are scum. And excuse me for saying but your ex needs counseling.
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 2:42:20 PM EST
You need to call the cops in the jurisdiction in which his contact with her occurred and have them investigate the violation of the restraining order.
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 2:45:57 PM EST
Yes, and a court order that will not allow the ex to have contact with the daughter in the physical presence of the slimeball. Don Out
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 2:45:58 PM EST
Yep, get the phone number to the cops and get him arrested. You could probably call the Washington State Police and get the phone number from them. I'm sure they have a website. The local police should be able to give you any information you need to persue the matter. As a side note...boy would I be pissed. Good luck Michael
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 3:08:22 PM EST
I have tried, but regular patrol LE says "is he there now? If not, I cant do anything." I have tried calling his prosecutor, all for naught. I am going Nucking Futs!
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 3:10:48 PM EST
People like this are scum. And excuse me for saying but your ex needs counseling.
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rainman, thats just the tip of the iceburg!
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 3:26:43 PM EST
How old is your daughter? Is she old enough to learn how to defend herself?, call 911? If he were to do something inappropriate in the future, how would he explain bleeding, broken, severed (you fill in the blank)? If she is old enough to operate a cell phone, get her one, or a two way pager. Instruct her to contact 911 and then you should this happen again. Reassure her that what he is doing is BAD, EVIL, WRONG. Tell her that she should not feel GUILTY for what he is doing (a common response). Best of luck. Your assets are: 1. Communication with your family and the accused. 2. Prayer. 3. Write everything down. 4. Keep calling the police. BE PERSISTANT. 5. CC all written responses to your local politician. In my case this would be my district commissioner who also wants my vote. Keep us posted.
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 3:52:30 PM EST
Black Dog, sorry to hear this, Fuck the LEO's make contact with the Bandito's or the Hell's Angles they have a much better form of justice then our court system and LEO's
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 4:51:07 PM EST
Originally Posted By jimmyd223: Black Dog, sorry to hear this, Fuck the LEO's make contact with the Bandito's or the Hell's Angles they have a much better form of justice then our court system and LEO's
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I am getting very close to doing that very thing. This guy raped his own daughter, and my ex refuses to leave him. I dont understand how anyone could willingly subject his/her own daughter to a person like this.
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 4:54:50 PM EST
Go park yourself in the office of the court who issued the RO. Go to that office, find the secretary for that judge and don't leave until you get them to move on it. Don't know about WA laws but here in TX (the laws ought to be fairly close), RO's are a civil matter and is handled by the courts. The LEO's cannot get involved with a civil process, unless they physically see him violating the RO then they can issue a summons. But if he is not there, they can take a report and have it sent up to the DA's office or forwarded to the appropriate court. Unfortuantaely, you are getting stuck in between the criminal and civil sides of our justice system. Also, a big bummer is, if found in violation of the RO, which is usually referred to as Contempt of Court Order, is usually punished by a fine only. Go park yourself in the office of where the RO was issued and be a pain in the butt.
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 5:03:46 PM EST
Steel Spade Tip Shovel - $16.99 10x10 foot blue tarp at Walmar - $6.99 100 pounds of lime - $25.00 Knowing your daughter won't have to spend any more time around this asshole --Priceless. I'm with jimmyd223, contact the Angels, just be prepared to do a favor in return. Good luck brother, I can't imagine your pain. Isn't our justice sytem messed up? Maybe get your daughter a stun gun. crash.
Originally Posted By jimmyd223: Black Dog, sorry to hear this, Fuck the LEO's make contact with the Bandito's or the Hell's Angles they have a much better form of justice then our court system and LEO's
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Link Posted: 11/7/2001 5:15:08 PM EST
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 5:20:58 PM EST
Take your daughter to the CLOSEST Sherrif/police station and file a report NOW! Tell them that your daughter just told you about the molestation. They will take a report and forward it to the SD/PD where your ex lives. They will investigate and he will be arrested. Do it now. Do it now. Do it now. If you wait, you destroy your credibility with the cops. Document everything and make them do their job.
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 5:38:22 PM EST
Originally Posted By BlackDog714: I have tried, but regular patrol LE says "is he there now? If not, I cant do anything." I have tried calling his prosecutor, all for naught. I am going Nucking Futs!
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Ask to speak to a supervisor, and if that doesn't work the watch commander. Report any incidents as soon as you find out about them. Do you have sole custody? If so keep the Ex away. If not go to court to modify custody. Return to the court that issued the order and explain that the order hasn't benn properly enforced, or modify the order to include contact with your ex. If it is conditions of bail, perhaps not a restraining order, report the incidents to who ever monitors bail. Get the phone #, name of the detective, and case numbers of the previous investigation inviling your daughter, and have them handy when you call. Everytime you call for the police call the detective(s) and let them know about the contact.
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 5:46:09 PM EST
Hey man, I live in King County, so if any other members from Washington want to get together, we could have a little talk with him. [smile]
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 6:04:17 PM EST
I'm sorry that I have no legal advise to tell you. I just wanted you to know that I truly feel for you. I can't imagine what that whole experience would be like for you and your kid. You're in my thoughts and I hope with everything in my body that that mother f*cker gets what's coming to him. Be strong and even when things look bleak, never forget that you are your childs best hope now and always. Fight for her like I know you will.
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 6:48:48 PM EST
The hardest thing I have done, is NOT doing what I feel I need to do. No one seems to care but me (and you guys). This guy is sick, but I dont know who is more sick, the guy fucking with kids, or my ex allowing him in my daughters life. I can tell you my first reaction is what I am sure many of you would have felt. But alas, that would just have put my daughter with her mother permanatly. My daughter would be worse off now, just sitting there waiting for the next pervert my ex brings home. I am quickly becoming lost...
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 6:55:28 PM EST
Alright, here's what I think. First off, I am not very familiar with WA laws. When I was an LEO it was in another state. However, unless the laws here in WA are vastly different, Pakrat is right. Unless they are there to witness the violation of the RO, their hands are tied. As I see it, this is what you are faced with. 1.) Your immediate task is to not let your daughter go into any situation where there is the even the remote chance she could be in contact with this guy. You didn't mention the visitation agreement you and your ex have. Whatever it is, I'd say you have every reason to consider it null and void. You may have some legal headaches because of this, so contact the best layer you can. 2.) Do NOT fly off the handle. In a sane world I and most everyone on this board within a days drive would meet you and help you lynch this SOB. The same thing happened to someone I loved more than anything in the world. Your daughter is going to need you. There is going to be a lot of pain and difficult times ahead. Its going to tear you apart inside. But if you make a rash decision and get your ass in a sling, her chances of overcoming this just got a lot worse. 3.) Resign yourself to the fact that you are going to have to go through the legal system. Again, get that laywer. I pray for you and your daughter.
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 9:06:57 PM EST
[Last Edit: 11/7/2001 9:05:51 PM EST by Wiggins]
Most importantly remember to protect yourself through this ordeal. Under Washington State law your ex could say you threatened her, that you were violent, and it would be investigated as domestic violence (source the Commander of Spokane Police Training Center/SWAT Team/Instructor for Gonzaga U's Issues in Law Enforcement Class). Your wife could then fake leaving the sub human POS and challenge for sole custody of your daughter. With a domestic violence investigation, or God forbid, charge against you the odds would be stacked against you. Have witnesses to any contact you have with your ex or her boyfriend. Document EVERYTHING. Your daughter's safety comes first, of course, but it is all for naught if she ends up with her mother because you didn't watch your six. I hope this turns out for the best. Kyle
Link Posted: 11/7/2001 10:52:35 PM EST
BlackDog714- I'm an LEO in Snohomish County, is that close enough? First of all, you need to file a report with whatever police/sheriff's department has jurisdiction over the area where the order violation is occurring. Violations of all types of orders are subject to arrest, with the exception of an anti-harassment order. Before you file a report, try to get the scumbag's name and date of birth, that way the PD can verify that there is an existing order (very important). Also, try to find witnesses to the order violation. If a patrol officer says he won't take a report on this because the violation isn't still occurring, go to the station yourself and talk to a supervisor. It's not for a patrol officer to decide whether it really happened or not. That's the job of the prosecutor and judge. Personally, when I take an order violation report, if I don't have any neutral witnesses to the violation, and it's a he said/she said kinda thing, I just write it up and let the prosecutor decide. So that's about the best advice I can give you. SeMPer Fi
Link Posted: 11/8/2001 9:14:46 AM EST
BlackDog, First, let me say that I am on your side. Next, take jorge5811's advice and immediately report the violation of the court's order. You should also contact the Prosecutor's Office handling the scumbag's case and your own attorney and have him pursue it for you, too. I assume that you want your child out of that environment. This will probably do it. [b]DO NOT TAKE ANY ADVICE THAT SUGGESTS THAT YOU COMMIT ANY CRIME TO RESOLVE THIS MATTER!.[/b] jimmyd223 has suggested that you contact outlaw biker gangs to engage them to employ their style of justice. Doing that will likely result in the murder of the scumbag. That would make you a murderer, too. How will that help your child?
Link Posted: 11/8/2001 10:11:56 AM EST
[Last Edit: 11/8/2001 10:05:29 AM EST by Striker]
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