DOES ANYONE KNOW A GOOD STORY? I SEE YA'LL TALK ABOUT ALOT OF STUFF.HOW ABOUT AN UNOPINIONATED STORY.JUST WOULD LIKE TO HEAR A FUNNY OR REALISTIC EXPERIENCE.

This happened to me just after I turned 16 a few years back.  It is a transcript of a speech I gave in public speaking class a few months ago.  It was saved on my computer and I don't want to retype it.  Here goes



The story I am about to tell you is of an adventure shared by a few of my friends and I on a day in early fall.  It was the beginning of our junior year in high school and my friend Travis had just gotten his drivers license.
I woke up that morning to my mom trying to get me out of bed she was saying Travis was at the front door and he wanted to talk to me.  I went in to my living  room and Travis and asked me for my help.  A Christian singer, Rich Mullins, was at my school that morning and had asked Travis if he would help him move from show to show.  Travis agreed to help and asked if he could bring some friends along, this is where I came in.
I told Travis that I would help because what’s better than missing school?  We hopped in Travis’ 1976 light blue and rust colored Buick Skylark and were off, our first stop of the day was my own high school in Sturgeon where we listened to the band and the standard inspirational speech, given at all high school assemblies.  We then packed up he bands hundreds of pound of gear and went to Renick.  At Renick we unloaded the gear and sat down to watch the same show again.  The length of this show was an hour and a half so you can imagine we were pretty bored.  After the show we packed up and went to work loading up the heavy speakers again so they could be transported to our next stop Higbee.   We hopped back in the Skylark and drove to Higbee where we once again unloaded the equipment.  The students filed into the gym and the show began, again.  This time we were not going to listen to it so we sat out in the car.  When the show was over we went to out packing duties.
Once everything was packed and ready Rich came over to talk to us.  He said that we should come to his show tonight in Centrailia.  He must have saw the look on our faces because he said that it was going to be a concert and not the same show we had sat through for what felt like 100  times.  Best of all, he said, it is free.    We told him we would try to make it and set out for home.  On the way Travis asked me ir I would like to ride with him to Centrailia that night to the concert I agreed.
At about 5:30 that night he picked my up, along with Ira and Jenny, a couple of my other friends, and we went to the concert.  We got there early and waited for the music to begin.  Finally Rich came out and began.  After about 15 minutes of the concert, I looked at Travis, he was thinking the same thing, this sucks.  We got up and walked out.
 

I was in the back seat, this back seat was in terrible shape.  I didn’t have a place to click your seatbelt into.   On our way home we stopped for a soda.  After that we got on highway 22 and began to drive back to Sturgeon.  On the way a maroon car passed us and the people inside were looking back at us and pointing.  Travis being a stupid kid and a young driver decided that these people needed to be passed again.  By the time we caught up to them they were following close behind another car.  No matter Travis thought we will pass them both.  The cost was clear so we pulled out to pass.  Moving at a speed of about 70 mph  we passed the maroon car to Travis’ delight, but as we approached the second car we all turned to look at it.  There on the side of the car was bright yellow letters, MISSOURI STATE HIGHWAY PATROL.   Those words sent instant feat through Travis causing him to slam on his breaks.  Slamming on the breaks made the skylark to go out of control and the highway patrolman ran off the road.  Travis pulled over immediately and the maroon car sped by.  After a few seconds to thank the Lord we were alive red and blue lights began to flash behind us and we heard the sounds of a man running at the car.  In a flash the officer was yelling hands in the air.  He grabbed Travis and dragged hin to the hood of his patrol car.  As we listed to him yelling and slamming doors we contemplated the long walk home when they towed Travis’ car.  The officer then came to our car an checked for seat belts and gave us a lecture about reaching for seatbelts while being pulled over.  He looked at me, I had covered the place where my seat belt was supposed to be with my shirt.  He didn’t say anything, I was off the hook.  The officer walked away and let Travis return.  The amazing part is that Travis didn’t get so much as a ticket.  The patrol car drove away and we followed.  We rode the rest of the way in silence.  Travis begged us not to tell his parents.  To my knowledge they never found out, although my parents had a good laugh.

THANKS ALOT THOSE WERE REALLY GOOD STORIES.

I used to employee a one armed Latino man as my carpenter helper named ABLE.  
His favorite saying being a one armed man was my name is able and I'm able..  He had prison tattoos on his back a huge virgin Mary and of coarse numerous tattoos on his arms..  I made him wear long sleeve shirts to work as my customers are all rich and would probably not use me again if they saw his tattoos...  I have to admit...  he worked harder and faster than most two armed lackeys and there wasn't anything he couldn't do...

Anyway.. I was up on a 2nd story roof...  he was on the ground...  and I was calling him measurements of a redwood deck I was building....  I yelled to him to write from #1 thru
#10 and told him to write legibly.       " I didn't want to have to ladder back up because I couldn't read his hand writing"   ...  he said OK boss...


when I got back down to the ground he had written on the tablet....


#1   Legibilly
#2  12'6"
#3  12'6"
#4   12'6.25"
#5  12'6"
#6  12'6.50"
#7 12''7"
#8 12''7.25"
#9 12''7.25"
#10 12''7.50"

I thought that was a classic....   [:)]


realist out

I'm sorry for focusing on the negative but [b]what the hell kind of word is this?[/b] It's [b]CONVERSE.[/B]

Did I tell you about the time the entire 4th precinct of the Suffolk County PD chased me all over Yaphank and Patchogue and missed? [;)]

This is a common word. Usualy followed by " I just put 5 gallon of gas in my Fords, But I spilled some on the arshfault."

                  --The SouthernLinguist

Back when my wife and I were dating we had plans to go out one evening after I had gone hunting. I told her that I had to get my truck washed as it was a little muddy inside and out. As I was leaving the house she had a look on her face like she had a question. I said what is it and she said are you going to the automatic wash or doing it yourself? I thought she wanted me to hurry. I told her I was just going to the automatic wash. I was about to walk out the door when she asked again with a puzzled look "doesn't the back fill up with water?" I just smiled and said I leave the tailgate down. and left knowing that I had to marry her. Anyone that naive should not live alone.

Another time the subject turned to auto theft. I told her G.Ms are easy to steal and probably stolen more often than any other car. I could see this caused her some concern. At that time she had a Chevy Cavalier Z24. She asked what she could do to prevent theft of her car. I said most of the time a club will work but it won't stop a determined thief. She replied  "oh I could never hurt anyone". She's not blond she just acts that way sometimes.

You're just fishing for the McUzi crack hoe story. Aren't ya!