By unexpected BJs, do you mean where I beg for a BJ and she actually gives me one?

Yeah, that happened once in 2012.

If I was in some of your shoes I would be divorced and on number 2. Life is to short for withholding sex. 

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You, my friend, are a rare breed indeed. Your husband is quite lucky.

And as a man with a fairly strong sex drive, I frankly don't care if I'm working on my manifesto, fighting Smough and Ornstein, bored to tears on a long drive or defusing a nuke, a blowjob is always a welcome surprise.

She is practicing what she learned from her boyfriend just to get it right.

LOL
I'm very rude.

I like to grab ass to get my point across quickly.

Newp, though I concede if you fully expect her to say "no" every time and then she once miraculously said "yes" it probably would be unexpected. But this thread is gauging how many respondents get a BJ without having to ask (or as part of your usual foreplay/sex). 

My wife was a total nympho when we met and for about the first six years I got them lots (and most led to sex). After our second was born, almost 11 years ago, that stuff dried up. I still get BJs during foreplay, but sex now is a 3-5 times per month thing, with half of those being quickies where she isn't interested and just want to go to bed.

guess we're the only 2 lucky ones.

Yep.

Yes, still get surprise BJ's....25 years on.

Thanks. I like to think he was. I got divorced after 10 years.

I have a high sex drive too, but you know, I cut off the sex like all these poor guys' wives too, long before I packed my bags.

If I was a guy, and my woman wasn't putting out, I'd be expecting divorce papers or at least pulling out all the stops to try to get us back on track.

Women want a man they can blow. It's natural. We want a dude to put on a pedestal. There's got to be a way for husbands to keep that respect and the leader position that makes wives want to blow them instead of the guys in the romance novels or the mailman or whoever. Assuming, of course, that she's not simply defective and evil.

Voted, Yes, but... meh

We're very alike, but there are some tiny details where we're a touch different.

At this point of my marriage I'd tongue that.

There you go!

Care to tell us mere mortals what that is?

WTF is a BJ?????????????  

25 years later and it's all good.

The answer literally every single time would be option #1

Ummmmm, yea....ok, you win todays internetz Miss Snow.
Truly a rare specimen you are.

Married 30 years to my high school sweetheart.  The answer is yes, but it took years of learning to communicate.  

Our 30th year is our best year in every way.  Communication. Sex. Money. 

I'm the blessed-est man.  

Nah, that ended when the kids started walking around.

FPNI.

1 in 5 years.

After the 2nd kid three years ago everything changed.  Such a bummer too.  We've got a lot going on, her nearly finished with school to be a vet, me at a high point in my career.  We're about to pull in some coin.  Just not able to find the right moment.  Sleep is a precious commodity to us both.  It's a rare moment to be together alone.  I'm supposing that once she finishes with school we'll figure it out.

Now, my ex, OTOH, was pretty ferocious.

When we were dating, my then girlfriend would tell me often that she was looking forward to being married so she could blow me, because she loves giving oral so much.

Now that we're married, she doesn't offer, and quite often turns me down.  We've argued her frigidity back and forth multiple times.  Last time was last month.  I told he she needed to decide if she wanted to be my wife or not.  I said I was willing to suffer her lack of affection a bit longer, but not forever.  I must admit, seeing her crying as she realized what she had and was doing to our relationship was slightly satisfying.

Either this turns around and soon, or she's out.

I can't tell you exactly what makes your wife tick. I can tell you what makes me tick and I can observe and analyze women ticking for men, and then speculate about how a guy can keep making his wife tick after the wedding.

I see women lose interest in husbands while maintaining great interest in men who aren't their husbands. Part of that has to be the appeal of the "new shiny".

I see women who respect their men to the point of being a little scared of them cater to those men and bend over backwards for them.

I see the partner with all the 'walk away power' getting put on the pedestal and his or her worshipper being happy as a pig in shit to keep this great boyfriend or girlfriend.

I hear women complain that there's not any excitement or passion and men complain that they walk on eggshells around their bitchy wives.

I see that awful pickup artist stuff working and I see cunty female manipulations work just as well.

My conclusion is that you should marry someone naturally inclined to respect you and that you should do your best to be a man she has to respect. Be slightly dangerous and let her feel the pain when she's a bitch. Pitch a giant fit the first time she cuts you off and interrogate her ass to see what's got her upset to the point she'd deny you your bj. Hold her feet to the fire. Be fair, be good to her, but be almost too much man for her to handle. Keep her on her toes and trying to keep you happy, not the other way around.

In other words, all the qualities of the badboy (passion, masculinity, dominance, danger etc.) with none of the actual badness. Wrap that woman around your finger and she'll be so happy.

But you have to know what makes her tick. You can't skip the interrogations. The magic badboy boyfriend has to "get" her. He has to be insanely possessive of her very soul. Like the fuckers from twilight and 50 shades. She can't lie to you because you know her inside out. Because you put in the time and regular maintenance and you're genuinely interested in knowing every little corner of her psyche.

Be her god and keep her god fearing and faithful. Keep that sword of Damocles over the bed.

That's one way. You have to figure your own woman out, though. It's work.

So you both have time to do laundry and shower and stuff but you don't have time to fuck? I hate to be mean, but ive seldom seen the "it'll get better once xyz is done" thing work out well.

I dated a girl like that and it was the only reason I stayed as long as I did. I was in the shower one day, she hopped in, clothes still on, took care of me, got out and fixed supper.

But she was a gold digger and I cut her loose.

I can't be reading this right.

Your gf told she loves sucking dick, but she wouldn't do it until you were married?

Are you Mormon or something?

No offense, but what else in your life is worth making time for than intimacy with your spouse? Putting that shit on the back burner is a marriage killer, trust me. If you don't work on it, and make it a priority, you'll create resentment and little else.

I don't believe in sex before marriage.  She had been married, but was abandoned by an adulterous abuser a few years before meeting me.

Interesting.

You fucking bitches wish you where in the 25%. Let me guess TMJ excuse.

Sadly this. And FPNI 

Pffft

Lucky if we do it once a week!!

And BJ's?   Whats a BJ?  


Wifey doesnt like to give or recieve.  

Married 27 years now. She's 46 and I'm 48.  

I get one on my birthday like clockwork other than that it's a no not often.

If I wanted to land a guy like you, I certainly wouldn't say my ex left me because I hate sex. Or that I left him because he wouldn't give me the remote control.

Agree with this.  And, I can't imagine not wanting to give a BJ to the man I love.  Notice, I said "want" not doing it because I have to.  It is awesome to being the one you love pleasure.

An older gentleman I respect suggested that I volunteer to do the dishes once in awhile.  Foot rubs aren't a bad place to start either.  Not a trick, it's a relationship thing.

Making your woman feel like she's valued pays fantastic dividends in all facets of the relationship.

Maybe once a year (married 27 years) and it usually involves an unusual location like the top of a mountain or the middle of an apple orchard. I think it is the vacation BJ. But BJ's are a routine part of our "Adult alone time"

Sounds like a bad thing today.

Married nearly 29 years.  My wife rarely if ever initiates sex of any kind. 




Then again, she rarely if ever tells me no so it kind of evens out. 

LOFL

She usually comes a lot harder during 69 so yeah I get mine out of it too..

The more holes tended to the better ...the strength of the orgasm goes up exponentially

Yeah, sad but true.  It's a long story.  Nothing mean about it, it's the truth.  Either it gets fixed now or never.