You are going to read through three pages of hell on earth.  But you came to post this.  Sure you do.  It's ok.  

Oh yeah!  My childhood best friend's parents went through this.  From what I understand the sex was almost entirely for procreation and they only had 2 kids.  Their youngest daughter was my age and I was in my mid-twenties when I learned that her conception was the last time they'd had sex.  He was eventually caught because he disappeared from work (family business) and they searched his truck and found sex toys in his glove compartment.  They're still married from what I gather but it's in name only.

Maybe some of you guys just need to try to the carpet bomb approach, I don't really beg for it, I just go for it numerous times a day. Usually she can dodge it.

I just called her at work and told her I deadlifted today, so she needed to get home in a timely fashion so I could use some of that testosterone on her. Her mom will have the kids until early this evening, so if I time it right I'll get sexy professional lady sex once she walks through the door.

Video games you say?

This can also happen as a consequence of surgery.

Well for starters she might think I wanted to.

OK, so I am reading all pages.   So many quotes that I could take.

Well marriages take daily maintenance. Once you start getting too into a routine
that wasn't as romantic as when you were dating is when things will start to slide.
I'm sure there are several other factors but this is a big one. I couldn't imagine not
getting it 3 to 4 times a week on average but then again. Like I said, maintenance.

Has anyone successfully asked the wife for a threesome? If so, please share your wisdom.

They post those in Team since the rules got relaxed...........

 

He really didn't think that one through. That's unfortunate.

It might not be him, it could be her.

A lot of guys loose interest because they have been shot down so many times. She may be asking "why does he have such a lot sex drive?" but in all reality hes jerking it twice a day. Not realizing after years of rejection, he finds it easier and more rewarding to take care of his own needs. He can come home early, grab the kids from school, get their home work done, make dinner, put the kids to bed early, they rub her feet on the couch while watching some stupi show like dancing with the stars, hope she doesn't fall asleep, then when in bed give her a 15 min back run and after all of that effort she says "My head hurts", "Im not in the mood", etc....after you get that enough times you just say f**k it, im not bending over backwards to get shot down, and MAYBE if youre lucky she will say "Fine" So while she lays there like a corpse you scramble to get it down before she falls asleep.

OR

just say im taking a "shower" and while on your iphone you can look at college age women who are 10x better looking than any women you've seen naked in real life do things you couldn't pay a girl to do even if you had a million dollars!

I'm not sure I'd call it wisdom, no one I've known who did stayed married much longer.

Well hold on now, there may be something to the "wisdom" bit after all.

 

I am curious as to your views on dudes who hit on chicks.

Do you have  the same idea of " if a guy gets turned down every time"  he should quit asking women out?

Serious question

I'm going to get it orrrr I'm going to find someone who will give it.  Dating, not married so this can actually work; e.g. I'm not attached via law if she closes up shop; I'm out.

Lots of women feel it their marital duty and thats that.  They have never giv3n themselves a chance to unwind and be free to enjoy sex. They are afraid of being judged  for things they want in the bed room. Example If you do this your a slut. Good.girls.dont do that etc

My sex life is back to awesome. Every night now. Yay!!! Yes with my wife...

Wait, what?

In conversations with my wife that isn't entirely true.

She has a number of fairly of attractive friends who are getting none and are absolutely befuddled why.  Some of these women are really good looking.  I have offered my services as a therapist but my wife doesn't like the idea for some reason.

I think guys get fat, stop working out, eating shit food and their dicks stop working.

When I am working out a lot (especially weights) I am insatiable.  I stop working out for whatever reason, my libido drops big time.

 
Not gay.


Bros helping bros.

That's where I'm at. There is a thing aa too much sex but it's awesome to feel so sexually desired by someone.

LOL, wut?

Unless youre super wealthy you will eventually have to settle down if you want to keep at it with a decent women.

Women love to sleep around in their early 20s but by  their late 20s most women are looking for a ring on their finger and the market for available quality women dries up fast. once you get into your 30s the pickings get very slim, maybe a divorcee with no kids but they are hard to find. And by your 40s your scraping the bottom of the barrel, most are obese and have a gaggle of snot nose kids hanging around, and most women get custody so you will be raising another mans kids.

Fairly attractive to YOU and ME. To the guys that have been hitting it the last few years it's gotten boring.

Heavy weight lifting increases testosterone production. I agree, when I get lazy or busy at work (Desk job) and I don't get to the gym I find the desire drops off some.

It probably gets worse with porn brain too. Lots of young guys, who should be able to get it up whenever they want, are now having ED problems when they are with women because they have spent so long with instant access to porn, and never had a chance to experience sex how it really is.

If it is happening to guys in their prime, I am sure it is a contributing factor to older guys who would be prone to it anyway.

I won't even know what to do with myself when I don't want it anymore. Sometime in my 20s it tapered off as I transitioned from that teenager mindset of wanting to get laid about 23 hours a day, to something a little more reasonable, but I still want some almost every night.

Like you said too, when I am consistent with workouts, it just doubles how much I want it. That's part of the reason I want my wife to start working out with weights, it might lead to me getting some a few more times a week.

While dating for a few years in college it was usually a several times a week, im sure I wanted more at the time but never felt I was being denied, certainly wouldn't have kept dating her if we weren't compatible.. When we got married, actually about 2 months before we got married it just stopped, went from a couple times a week to once a month. Was that way for several years, as stated in a previous post there was a 6 month dry spell at one point. After some serious conversations and It eventually returned but not what it was, probably 1-2 times a week tops. Which isn't great but not terrible either, statistically the average married couple in the US has sex 100 times a year, so about twice a week.

Then they must not be very good at it.

I've been sleeping with my wife exclusively for 15 years now. We were horny teenagers together, right up until now with two kids and some weight gain on her end (nothing crazy, still attracted to her).

If she was magically back to her early 20s weight and figure tomorrow I wouldn't be going to work. If you have an attractive woman, and actually care for her, getting frisky should never be boring unless one or both of you is no good at it and unwilling to experiment.

Pro Tip:  Good sex comes from good marriages.  Great sex is the RESULT of a Great Marriage.....not the other way around.

I wish I could agree with you but I think it's biologically natural to yearn for greener pastures.

 
So is sexual repression.

I guess, but it's a pointless endevour when you have it at home already.

Especially if you aren't in a position to be upgrading.

How many old fat guys are like "I could do better than my moderately attractive wife that I'm not interesting in banging anymore"

When in reality without lots of coin, they couldn't

My wife wanted sex more than me when we started dating eight years ago and she was and still is pretty freaky , which is cool. There were a few things I raised an eyebrow to , but said ok lets do this! I can remember a few conversations from her asking me for more sex and saying it was a huge part of a relationship and she needed to feel that connection.

Lately stress, her shitbag kid moved in with her six year old kid,  a recent surgery and running injury have lessened her desires for play time. She knows she is not mentally there right now and she  also feels she has fallen out of shape which does impact the drive.

We use to work out all the time and sex was two or three times a week if not more. I hope she bounces back soon as I do get a bit crabby about shit when im not getting any.

mixnmatch24 is a lesbo, turning straight.
Didn't you know?

A.W.D.

Ive been at 100% since I was a teenager. I can't think of a time where I was really "satisfied" with the amount of sex I had. I never really was into porn, and never cheated...just was obsessed with gfs and eventually the wife. I have been heavy into the gym for a long time, 3-4 times a week

Things were great for 5 years of dating. Maybe sloughed off a bit, still probably averaged once a day at least. When I say things shut off after the wedding I mean it. She tried to stay in her mom's room wedding night, and the week and a half honeymoon consisted of sex ONCE. It got worse and worse and I probably got to the point where I gave up on asking. Started with excuses, ended up being "I'm not your prostitute".

When I told her I wanted a divorce, she blamed this or that and was like "I'll have sex with you whenever you want" which lets me know she was holding out.

When I say that lack of sex kills relationships, I mean it. She can bitch at you for a lot of stuff but if you get laid regularly you do some stupid shit for her without even blinking

Count me in on this train too.  The other night I tried to just cop a feel before she got in the shower and I offered to do anything
she wanted me to do. She said " I don't want anything from you sexually" When she does cave it's like once a month.

We have a 14 month old and I'm not sure what to do. I'm fucking pissed but don't want to lose everything I've worked so hard for.
Guess I'll hang in there till I can't no more.  I love me daughter to much to not see her everyday.

Edit: Don't get me started on how much shit I do around the house either. She wouldn't clean something worth a damn if her life depended on it.

To preface, my wife has some medical issues.  Her period absolutely cripples her for about 7-12 days a month,  She's intolerant of hormonal BC.  And she's darn near medically incapable of a quickie - without literally hours of foreplay, she's too tight.  It's a muscle/mental thing.  So there are some definite problems on her side with having an active sex life.

Meanwhile, it seems like our life has been in crisis mode since we got married.  Literally something's always going wrong.  She lost her job last September and wasn't employed again until like November.  I've been dealing helping to take care of my parents as they've both had pretty serious medical issues that affected their mobility.  I got in a car accident.  We've had big unexpected car and home repairs.  Her job lost an employee which they haven't replaced, so she's one of only two people (the other is the owner) working there.  This past year has been an enormous, stressful crapshow.

Last October, all sex or romantic touch completely dried up.  I actually wrote about it here, after like a month and a half.  In the following months, I tried talking to her.  I tried snide comments.  I tried writing her letters.  I tried bribery.  I tried taking away the non-romantic touch that she liked just to see if she could draw a correlation.

In July, I got angry.  I sat her down on the couch and told her that she was giving me the marriage I always feared, the one my parents have.  No romance, no excitement, just roommates.  She'd built up a lot of resentment in me and I wished I'd never married her, not because of the lack of sex, but because she was completely and utterly dismissive of my worries and complaints that something was wrong.  I told her that she needed to fix her behavior or start getting ready to move out, because we didn't have a marriage at this point.  My exact quote was: "Every time you tell me you love me, I mentally correct you in my head.  You don't love me.  If you did, you'd see there was something wrong here, and you'd move heaven an earth to fix it, just like I would for you."

August was good.  September was better yet.  We ended up trialing a 24/7 week long "scene," and while we didn't make it a full week, it was fun.  My wife brought stuff up which surprised even me.  We'll be returning to that eventually.  We're not where I'd like to be, but the last 2 months have been more frequent than the past year.  October sucked because she got a stomach bug for about 10 days after her period, which pretty much erased the month.  Can't blame her for that though.  We did talk a few nights ago about her need to decrease stress, and while we didn't talk about sex, I did bring up the fact that her stress and general bad attitude about work was coming home with her and affecting our relationship, specifically how she treats me.

So...we're getting there.  Most of this was her fault.  I treat her like a queen (even she admits that, and tells me that all her friends are jealous of her), and she spent the last year treating me way the heck worse than her dog.  She's turning it around though.  I'm not going to give up though.  She shows signs of improvement, and like a pastor told me once, "If we only loved people because of the loveable things they do for us, nobody would be loved."  But I'm not going to be a doormat though.  If she doesn't want to be my wife, that's her decision and I'll respect it and her right out the door.

And I've got gunsmithing projects, prepping, 2 gardens, and an XBOX to keep me from going totally insane while she turns things around.

If that was me, I would have ejected before we even started dating You can't change people.

Not going to help.

15 years or so since she wanted sex. Been at least ten since she was medically able.

FML

Does she let you sleep with other women?

I can see if you dick is broke, but viagra is a wonder drug

It's like being 16 again


I'm 47 and we still have sex 3-4 times a week


I couldn't imagine no sex unless it was some medical problem.


I found the secret, let's be honest my doesn't want sex as much as me

So I give her a good 20-30 min massage and then I can do what I want

The state in which our society is in today, you are 100% correct.

There's a reason every major religion states a wife shall not withhold herself from her husband.

They figured that shit out a long time ago the pussy is not a bargaining tool, the power of her pussy will go to a womens head.

Unless the society shuns it, which ours now embraces it.

Fuck it I'd almost rather jerk off, almost

 
Counseling. Now.


Your daughter will be hardwiring her little brain chemistry in the next couple years, setting things about what couples are, what healthy relationships feel like, and what love looks like.


You think being a pent-up, hurt, resentful husband during all of those years is going to do her ANY favors? It's going to create a person who makes bad choices in their relationships, because you gave her the template. Children soak that shit up like a magic sponge, you won't be hiding it.


Fix your marriage, and that starts by having a long honest conversation to your wife....and convey that very thing. Neglecting intimacy and doing so coldly is not going to make a good marriage, and that will be something she's teaching to her child....a lesson you can't undo. If she's not willing to work on that, then you have a tough road ahead of you.

You're overlooking the fact that as men get older, impotence becomes more and more prevalent. After a certain point, not even Viagra helps.

I work night shift so I'm gone 4 nights a week. We usually only fuck Friday and Saturday, Sunday if the kids are asleep or something. Working nights is hard on that shit. Still by Friday she is ready for anything even if we are both tired. 30 and 2 kids. I'll take twice a week working nights.

For what it's worth, I think men have a lot to do with there lack of sex in relationships. Why? Because 70% of American men are fat slobs who drink too much and eat garbage while not getting off the couch. You think your wife is interested in banging your fat ass? No she is not. She wants to bang the guy who does Crossfit/lifts heavy 6 days a week and doesn't spend all his free time drinking. Yep, I do crossfit or Olympic lifting 6 days a week. Yep, my wife (and most of her friends) are quite attracted to me because of this. Don't let anyone sugar it, being physically attracted to someone plays a HUGE part in sex drive, married or not.

It's called alpha. Obtain it.

I feel for you fellows, we went through a spell like that when she started menopause.

I just made her understand I just need 10-20 mins of her time

And she agreed and learned other fun ways to please me on down days.


Good thing is her period ended a few months ago and she is a changed woman

Like the older gal from sex in the city.


Just sit down and explain how much it means to you to

Enjoy your wife sexually don't yell, be kind.


If she truly understands she will come to an agreement that works for both of

You.


Good luck.