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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:15:42 PM EDT
[#1]
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My dog learned to beg by watching me in the bedroom. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:16:30 PM EDT
[#2]
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My wife and I are really into S&M. She sleeps and I masturbate. 
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:16:51 PM EDT
[#3]
I suppose I should reiterate my first point to make sure i'm on the record as being a dissenting voice
I think the primary reason is hinted at in the OP poor communication. Or to be more specific both parties forgot what was necessary for relations earlier in the relationship. Once you get married or have been together for a while sometimes you think sex will just happen. I myself with my wife forgot how hard I used to work to nail her when we were dating. For women sometimes they forget all the not so subtle hints they used to drop when they were horny. Once I started working hard to get the experiences to happen like before they started to happen more often. Barring physical and mental conditions (low t and all that) that should be enough to at least elicit a response out of your partner. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:19:13 PM EDT
[#4]
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How many times was coworker's husband rejected by his wife before he lost interest? Two sides to every story. This. I could fuck three times a day happily. I'm lucky if my wife has pity sex with me once a week anymore. So I have quit trying as well. Tired of being turned down. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:19:16 PM EDT
[#5]
Good buddy has not had sex for months , but mostly because his live in GF has gained so much weight he just doesnt feel the desire. Im sure that can go both ways and you might think " hey you love them so why cant you get it on" but it happens.
When my ex wife gained weight our sex life went in the crapper. If im not attracted to you im not going to show much interest in sex other than just getting that release once in awhile. 
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:19:20 PM EDT
[#6]
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Of the women I'm close enough to that we'd discuss it, I've known 2 who say their husband expects it every day and if he doesn't get it he pouts and gets bitchy. And 4 who say it's like pulling teeth to get some action from him. I guess everyone else is pretty evenly matched or they just don't want to talk about it. My wife would say that I fit this description. I would argue that being told 'no' 27 days out of 30 might lead to a little complaining. For the record (again, as I've mentioned it here before) she knows she has a few issues and tries to work around them. I appreciate her efforts and try not to browbeat her. That being said...it's tough to be repeatedly rejected. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:20:09 PM EDT
[#7]
I got shot down a few weeks ago when I asked if we could invite our waitress home
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:20:47 PM EDT
[#8]
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Of the women I'm close enough to that we'd discuss it, I've known 2 who say their husband expects it every day and if he doesn't get it he pouts and gets bitchy. And 4 who say it's like pulling teeth to get some action from him. I guess everyone else is pretty evenly matched or they just don't want to talk about it. For some women, initiating sex is incredibly awkward. They just expect their partner to start things off. My wife used to be that way and I suck at reading body language, lol. I wonder if some of these ladies just need to try harder? If they are crawling on top of their man naked and saying, do you want to finish in my mouth, or ass?" and he says "not tonight honey", there is something seriously wrong going on there... |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:23:14 PM EDT
[#9]
I told my wife she controls the source not the frequency. Pissed her off but she kicked it up a little.
Few months later, one of the bus stop moms gets all sweet on me, texting me all kinds of crazy sexual shit. Wife gets pissed at me! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!!! |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:23:51 PM EDT
[#10]
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if my wife doesn't put out, then i'm going to go on the prowl for dick It's good to have a plan B. Glad you found something that works for you! |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:24:00 PM EDT
[#11]
The seems to be a big problem with the new age of texting and Facebook communicating. Nobody knows how to talk on the phone anymore or talk face-to-face everything's texting via phone or FB.
Shit, I hear from many people they want to find out what's going on in the family go on the Facebook. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:24:18 PM EDT
[#12]
Who are you people that go for weeks, months, years without sex, while you're fucking married?! I am calling BS on most if not all of those comments. What is the point if you ain't fucking?
forget sex, if I don't get head 2-3 times a week we start to have problems. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:24:48 PM EDT
[#13]
Quoted:
I can't count how many times I've read posts by members, claiming that their wives were completely uninterested and they were just hanging in there for the kids. I've even known some men IRL that had similar situations. Today, my wife was telling me that her co-worker broke down and said that her husband hasn't touched her in 6 years. When I expressed shock at this (she's hot), my wife said she knows other women that claim that they have husbands with no interest in them sexually. This got me thinking that this could be a loop, created by poor communication in the relationship. I mean seriously, everyone wants sex at some point. I can see getting wrapped up in the daily chaos and realizing that it's been a couple of weeks. To go "years" without sex, there has to be some desire. Maybe you guys that are in this boat, should take her out, get a few drinks in her and act like it's your first date. What's the worst that could happen? 15 years married and got some this morning. 
I dont get how a guy sleeping with a woman in the same bed everyday can go a week without having sex, let alone years. No offence but Americans have a weird thing with sex. FerFAL |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:26:16 PM EDT
[#14]
I know of at least 2 guys who were married (in excess of 20 yrs), had kids, the whole shebang and turned out they were gay. They came from the generation where homosexuals were not mainstream like they are today. Turns out, they only got married and had kids in order to please their parents and keep the social stigma at bay.
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:26:27 PM EDT
[#15]
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After a guys is turned down enough times, he stops fucking asking. /thread |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:26:27 PM EDT
[#16]
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There's the angle of the women having major psyc/phys abuse in her past and sex is the trigger back to her time of abuse. Her man knows all about the trauma but stays in the marriage because she's a good women in every other aspect. Ask me how I know this. Yes, she's working on it. This. It's been probably 5 years or so for us, we are mid 40s. I am positive neither of us is cheating. She has a similar history and we went through some drama between ourselves several years back and just never recovered sexually. We have both gotten used to it. I love her no less for it. No sex. I sleep on the couch, she sleeps in the bed. Different work schedules affect that as well. But I love her to death and she is my best friend. We make it work. This isn't as rare as some of you believe. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:26:57 PM EDT
[#17]
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Living in one right now. Once or twice a month if Im lucky. That's not even close to a sexless marriage. That's 15-20 times a year |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:27:59 PM EDT
[#18]
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:28:02 PM EDT
[#19]
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Living it right now and it is gonna be the split of us. Lucky to get it twice a month. She literally has no interest in sex. She told me that when we started dating 9 years ago, being dumb i thought i could change her. Not so much, she does it for me but has no interest in it. She also has no interest in having kids and she is 32. We are 9 years in and I want kids and sex... we own a house together. But we have made the choice to likely go our own ways. If you are 32 and no kids, it's time to bail. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:28:11 PM EDT
[#20]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Ages? Low T is real. Plus depression, anxiety, etc. Lots of medications can cause low libido and/or ED, including several common blood pressure meds. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:28:58 PM EDT
[#21]
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if my wife doesn't put out, then i'm going to go on the prowl for dick Wait, what? |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:30:43 PM EDT
[#22]
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:30:57 PM EDT
[#23]
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Respect is crucial, if you start to feel your wife is dumb, or lazy, or inferior.. you start focusing on her shortcomings more than her strengths you lose respect and she's no longer attractive, this goes both ways. A wife can lose respect for her husband. If your spouse has no respect for you, your sex life will suffer (if not completely evaporate). Also if you're in a sexless relationship, especially one where you're both young, theres a strong chance infidelity exists. For a woman it can be emotional, mentally as satisfying as physical sexual activity for a man. I believe once the sex has gone. It very likely ain't coming back. (There are rare exceptions to this.) The most important thing in any relationship is 100% pure candid honesty WITH YOURSELF, and your spouse. When women don't respect a man, they can't feel emotionally secure. Things can't be comfortable because intimate space has been littered. A man who is contemptuous toward his wife leaves her not respecting or feeling emotionally safe with him. That's a two way street. It can happen to either spouse. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:31:19 PM EDT
[#24]
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wat? Quote HistoryQuoted:
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if my wife doesn't put out, then i'm going to go on the prowl for dick wat? Screen name is appropriate. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:31:58 PM EDT
[#25]
Quote HistoryQuoted: if my wife doesn't put out, then i'm going to go on the prowl for dick That really what you meant to say |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:34:47 PM EDT
[#26]
I seriously think my wife needs some different medication or something. She's got zero desire and no, she's not cheating on me.
She's on an anti-anxiety medication which has made her more chill, but now I'm worried she's depressed, spends almost every night reading romance novels in bed while the house is a disaster. She can't keep up with the kids during the day. When I come home from work she just dumps everything on me. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:37:40 PM EDT
[#27]
I'm sorry to hear the issues some of you all have. That sucks. Full stop.
My wife would be more than happy if I was slamming it 25/8. Since I stopped working out and kind of let myself go a bit, I've noticed a definite change in sex drive. When we work out regularly we turn into teenagers again. I need to stop being a lazy pile of shit... 
I saw a comedian one time and the only thing I remember from his set was this, "if you don't freak your woman, someone else will." Always thought that was pretty solid advice. Sometimes, instead of "hinting" that you want sex, you just have to grab her by the pussy.  But seriously, toss her on the bed or couch, start eating her out like she's got some 'tussin in there, then slam it on home.
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:37:51 PM EDT
[#28]
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I wonder how many women are ashamed to bring up their preferences. What decent woman is gonna come forward and say they want to be slapped around and choked like their old boyfriend did lol. With her beta husband? Ick. She's not into that kind of stuff anymore. An Alpha Widow spends a lifetime pining for that 15 minutes of sloppy uninhibited monkey sex she gave to Chad McThundercock back in HS/college and you're not him and never will be. So shut up and enjoy your reluctant once-a-month missionary sex with your rapidly aging wife and keep paying those bills dammit. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:37:57 PM EDT
[#29]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
This Quote HistoryQuoted:
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After a guys is turned down enough times, he stops fucking asking. Half the humans on the planet have vaginas, finding one to stick your dick into isn't all that hard. This This probably happens more often than people realize. Before I met my wife, I lived with a girl like this. For the first year or so of the relationship she was DTF any time, any place...most days more than once. Once she moved in, it was like a light switch was flipped off. I was lucky to get it once a month at first and it only got worse after that. When we did have sex it was only missionary in the bedroom. She wouldn't be on top because she was too self conscious of her body...from the back was too uncomfortable...had to be in the bedroom because she didn't want to mess up the house...plain boring dead fish sex. And once she had her orgasm that was it. I got really good at timing mine with her's, otherwise all she did was complain until I finished. It didn't matter how many massages I gave, how many times I sent her flowers, how many nice dinners we went out to, or how many times I helped her around the house...she always had an excuse for why we couldn't have sex. It didn't matter if I tried to be spontaneous or tried to plan it out. I got so damn tired of the rejection that I completely stopped showing interest in her. It wrecked our relationship because I resented her. Not only did I stop showing interest in her sexually but I stopped doing nice things for her. I think men need to feel like they are wanted and valued in the relationship just as much as women do. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:38:59 PM EDT
[#30]
It's actually worse than the wife just denying sex. They're a cock-block to fapping to. Eject.
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:39:43 PM EDT
[#31]
not married and told the girlfriend early on that as soon as the sex is over the relationship is over. shes a freak though and now im starting to think i might get tired soon of the constant fucking. true story.
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:39:49 PM EDT
[#32]
Quote HistoryQuoted: if my wife doesn't put out, then i'm going to go on the prowl for dick That's a pretty extreme solution. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:41:11 PM EDT
[#33]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
LDS culture, no sex before marriage. She always acted like she was going to be totally into it. My wife and I knew when they got home from their honeymoon that something wasn't right, we could just tell. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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A good friend of mine has a sexless marriage, been 15 years. I have told him he ought to just get a divorce. 15 years! are they in their 80s? To clarify, he has been married 15 years, and only has sex a time or two a year. His wife has zero interest. Zero. In fact, she wanted a kid so bad, but yet didnt want to have sex..so they did invitro. How did he not figure that out while they were dating? LDS culture, no sex before marriage. She always acted like she was going to be totally into it. My wife and I knew when they got home from their honeymoon that something wasn't right, we could just tell. And people think I'm a bad person for advocating pre-marital sex. Not be a man whore (or woman whore for that matter) but at least figuring out if you get along well in the bedroom before getting married. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:43:44 PM EDT
[#34]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
And people think I'm a bad person for advocating pre-marital sex. Not be a man whore (or woman whore for that matter) but at least figuring out if you get along well in the bedroom before getting married. I agree with you. It's a test of sexual chemistry, and if it isn't there entirely, you should move on. No sense in wasting time with Mr/Miss Wrong. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:44:34 PM EDT
[#35]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
if my wife doesn't put out, then i'm going to go on the prowl for dick 
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:44:42 PM EDT
[#36]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Ding ding ding Quote HistoryQuoted:
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After a guys is turned down enough times, he stops fucking asking. Half the humans on the planet have vaginas, finding one to stick your dick into isn't all that hard. Ding ding ding This. I honestly cannot imagine a happy sexless marriage, unless they're both over 65 and running into hormonal issues. Chemistry makes a marriage possible; sex keeps the marriage strong. The couples I know who've been married 25+ years always had the same thing to say when asked how their bond was so strong; a great sex life. In my experience, when you're frustrated, you are going to be stressed out, and all the little things your partner does that irritate you will pile up and bug the everliving shit out of you until you are just constantly pissed off and looking for an excuse to start a fight. But when you two are getting each other off regularly, it becomes much, much easier to ignore or entirely forget about those little annoyances. Good sex is very calming, and great stress relief. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:44:45 PM EDT
[#37]
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I wonder how many women are ashamed to bring up their preferences. What decent woman is gonna come forward and say they want to be slapped around and choked like their old boyfriend did lol. A good friend of mind dated another man's wife. She admitted to him that was what she wanted. So he did. She just looked at him and was like, "REALLY, I mean it, HIT ME! " He was a bit shook up.
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:46:32 PM EDT
[#38]
I cannot find a plus to marriage...It is actually the stupidest shit i ever heard of.
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:47:09 PM EDT
[#39]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Went througb.a dry spell during menopause. It sucked. She loved the attention from me, when I would wine her and dine her( massages flowers you name it I tried it all). We would be getting all lovey dovey then Id get shot down. After 8 months of me trying I just said fuck it tired of stressing about this and quit trying. Two years went by and boom its like we are dating again. Menopause sucks (pun intended). Happy hole went dry about 2 years back and no end in sight. Hopefully, in the near future, the hormones will settle down and things will go back to normal. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:48:16 PM EDT
[#40]
Quote HistoryQuoted: It costs you another piece of your soul. I have a friend who has one of those weirdo sexless marriages and he's a shell of his former self. At some point you cant keep asking and getting turned down. After our second child our marriage went through a pretty severe drought of almost a year and it was TERRIBLE. I never gave up on her but yea, it was a terrible experience for both of us but luckily she didn't like it either and did something about it. My friend with the sexless wife told me that if she does let him do it to her she tells him to hurry up and asks him if he's done yet. So many levels of WTF Sexless spouses in a marriage are soul reavers. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Quoted: How many times was coworker's husband rejected by his wife before he lost interest? Two sides to every story. That's my point. Maybe it was poor communication at the beginning that got them in this place. The chick I referenced in the OP is 36. What does it cost you to give it another shot? It costs you another piece of your soul. I have a friend who has one of those weirdo sexless marriages and he's a shell of his former self. At some point you cant keep asking and getting turned down. After our second child our marriage went through a pretty severe drought of almost a year and it was TERRIBLE. I never gave up on her but yea, it was a terrible experience for both of us but luckily she didn't like it either and did something about it. My friend with the sexless wife told me that if she does let him do it to her she tells him to hurry up and asks him if he's done yet. So many levels of WTF Sexless spouses in a marriage are soul reavers. I can speak to this, BOTH of my marriages ended up this way for two different reasons. Ex #1 played mind games with me and convinced me, that as a guy in my 20s, sex 1x a week was "obsessive" all while she was fucking my buddy. Ex #2's problems were all hormonal. We get along great now that she's regulated that stuff. I can tell you, rejection after rejection from someone who claims they love you really fucks up your head. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:49:43 PM EDT
[#41]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I cannot find a plus to marriage...It is actually the stupidest shit i ever heard of. Meh, when it's good...it's really good. My wife is wonderful and I can't imagine a life without her. I had to wade through some serious shit to find her though. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:50:08 PM EDT
[#42]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I told my wife she controls the source not the frequency. Pissed her off but she kicked it up a little. Few months later, one of the bus stop moms gets all sweet on me, texting me all kinds of crazy sexual shit. Wife gets pissed at me! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!!! Years ago, my wife watched a TV news report on how Jon Gosselin was dating his babysitter. This is after he got divorced from Kate. If you don't know, they had a reality show called Jon & Kate plus Eight. Anyway, my wife got mad at me for this.... because I partially resemble Jon. Not even kidding. Partial resemblance, maybe. I didn't do anything. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:52:21 PM EDT
[#43]
I wouldn't give you a nickle for a truck load of those motherfuckers!
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:55:02 PM EDT
[#44]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
It's good to have a plan B. Glad you found something that works for you! Quote HistoryQuoted:
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if my wife doesn't put out, then i'm going to go on the prowl for dick It's good to have a plan B. Glad you found something that works for you! Wouldn't that be plan.... D |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:56:02 PM EDT
[#45]
Quote HistoryQuoted: A good friend of mind dated another man's wife. She admitted to him that was what she wanted. So he did. She just looked at him and was like, "REALLY, I mean it, HIT ME! " He was a bit shook up. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: I wonder how many women are ashamed to bring up their preferences. What decent woman is gonna come forward and say they want to be slapped around and choked like their old boyfriend did lol. A good friend of mind dated another man's wife. She admitted to him that was what she wanted. So he did. She just looked at him and was like, "REALLY, I mean it, HIT ME! " He was a bit shook up. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 3:56:11 PM EDT
[#46]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
My wife and I are really into S&M. She sleeps and I masturbate. 
I was not expecting that! Bravo, sir! |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 4:02:46 PM EDT
[#47]
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It's been probably 5 years or so for us, we are mid 40s. I am positive neither of us is cheating. She has a similar history and we went through some drama between ourselves several years back and just never recovered sexually. We have both gotten used to it. I love her no less for it. No sex. I sleep on the couch, she sleeps in the bed. Different work schedules affect that as well. But I love her to death and she is my best friend. We make it work. This isn't as rare as some of you believe. Damn, did I write this? We apparently are living the same life. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 4:07:22 PM EDT
[#48]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Damn, did I write this? We apparently are living the same life. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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It's been probably 5 years or so for us, we are mid 40s. I am positive neither of us is cheating. She has a similar history and we went through some drama between ourselves several years back and just never recovered sexually. We have both gotten used to it. I love her no less for it. No sex. I sleep on the couch, she sleeps in the bed. Different work schedules affect that as well. But I love her to death and she is my best friend. We make it work. This isn't as rare as some of you believe. Damn, did I write this? We apparently are living the same life. My friends dad when we were growing up slept on the couch every night, I thought it was just because of his bad back. It wasn't until much later, after the divorce and we were adults, that I learned they weren't sleeping together (in either sense) for years before everything blew up. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 4:07:35 PM EDT
[#49]
At one point early in my marriage my wife and I went 6 months. (Her choice, not mine) It was a combination of stress, too focused on her career, family drama, feeling she didnt need to "please" me now that the ring was on her finger and in general not understanding how a healthy marriage works.
I think she went into it with a very feminist mentality of my life, my sexuality and I get to say when, where and how often. And I was very much a beta and treated her like a queen even when she was treating me like crap. We had discussed/argued about the topic on multiple occasions but finally one day I snapped and was done with it. She was giving me the classic line of "I dont HAVE to have sex with you just because were married" and with a relax, almost relieved face i said "well I dont HAVE to stay married to you" For the first time she realized marriage was a two way street and if she wasnt willing to meet me (Or any guy) in the middle on important issues like sex she might as well go down to the shelter and start picking out cats. Our marriage isn't perfect but we have come a long way since then. I will never do it again, ive learned my lesson and will not live the rest of my life that way, at least not until im really old, at which point poking granny rolls isnt much fun anyways. |
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Posted: 10/20/2016 4:10:09 PM EDT
[#50]
I will read all of the replies later. But married for 22 plus years. I can't remember when was the last time that we had sex. After asking and being turned down so many times. Or getting the ok but hurry up response. I don't care anymore. I will say that chemo treatments killed her interest over 5 years ago. But at this point. I really don't care anymore. Sure there are other issues. But, like I said. I really don't care anymore.
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