As long as he stays within the city limits of huntsville and madison he will be ok. It's the rural areas where having straight teeth and nothing crimson on will raise suspicions

Uh theres about 20 guys there, you got a arfcom patch or something?

Did you sell me a Ruger once about 5 years ago?  haha.

btw when is the Ruger sale?  Why is the website so messed up? caint find nothing on there.

It pains me to say it as a southerner, but the state of Ohio does know a thing or two about college football.

In spring summer and fall be sure you turn the lights off 30secs before you open the door 3 secs to let the dog in

I also like pepper in my grits and occasionally sausage pieces.

You just described Kid Rock, he hails from your state.

Stay away from locals peddling high end Night vision equipment

Great gun shop in Hoover......

Not sure if serious...

 
Looks aside, Kid Rock is actually a very intelligent person, vehemently 2A and from what I've read and heard, very humble to the people that helped him get where he is.


General all around good person.


Case in point:

We dont care how y'all did it "up north".

The reason it is so great here in the south is BECAUSE it aint like it is "up north".

When we get snow it is really ice with white stuff on top, we rarely get it and it gives us an excuse to stay home for a day or two.. We don't care that it was worse "up north" and y'all went to work any way.

I grew up in Alabama
If you ever heard  a Yankee accent ( rarely) ,heads turned
Now, it's full of you guys.

You'll be fine.

Good,luck

ETA

How about some USPSA or IDPA competition?  Any nearby?

Welcome!  

I grew up in Hville many years ago.  It's a great town.  

Sooooooo...  Larry's Pistol and Pawn is your first go to.  

Then look up axl and go canoeing/kayaking.  

One great thing about Hville is there are lots of good people living there not from there.  

Lists of good stuff:
Space and rocket center
Restaurant variety
Breweries
College hockey
Montesano State Park
Lake guntersville is not far
Lots of cool people

Enjoy being relatively free

Yes, Lots.

Theres a steel shoot tomorrow, but the guy at work is betting that thunderstorms win.

 
Bugs?  Those new fangled LED light bulbs from CREE don't attract bugs at all.


Oh, wait, don't tell you how we do things up north.  Sorry, won't happen again.

Know day to day recruiting, scores and whatnot about the SEC regardless of sport and that includes the women sports as well. Even the old ladies checking out at the grocery store expect you to be able to hold a conversation about it.

Your cuisine options have just changed dramatically. Sure, you can get any animal you want, but it's going to be deep fried.

We have no professional sports teams in the entire state, but that's irrelevant because anyone that graduates is an overpaid sell-out.


AL changed to Shall Issue in 2013.

Open carry is legal without a permit. Concealed carry is a NICS check and 10 bucks per year with a maximum of 5 years duration of the permit. I think you'll have to be a resident of the county for 6 months prior to getting a CCW. We don't do FOID's and waiting periods. Buying a gun here takes 5 minutes. (I don't know how that compares to Ohio)


That is indeed the city's sport. Or f-ing soccer.


You're now a Braves fan. Their games worth watching are in October and they will lose, but you still love them.

When you visit Athens, remember that those rednecks can't drive worth a damn. Especially in front of "The Wal-mart." Nashville is 2 hours north of you. Chattanooga is 2 hours east. Birmingham is nearly 2 hours south. Memphis and Tunica are about 4 hours west (Casinos). Atlanta is about 5 hours over yonder. Our maps might as well not have miles on them, because we judge distances by time. We have no lottery in the state and we still have no idea why. The Civil War was the War of Northern Aggression. A Confederate Flag/Battle Flag of Virginia doesn't mean a damn thing about secession. But if you see someone fly a Stars and Bars, they're probably crazy as hell and you might want to go the other way.

Your new Senators are Shelby and Sessions, and they're good people. Jeff Sessions is such good people he ran unopposed in his primary and general election last year. Of course everyone else's politicians have been in office too damn long. Your new Rep is Mo Brooks. And he can get on MSNBC and spout off whatever crazy, borderline racist, nonsense he wants because 1) we don't watch MSNBC and 2) he supports massive amounts of military spending which keeps Redstone Arsenal open thus Huntsville stimulated.

Also,
He's climin' in yo windows
He's snatching yo people up
Tryin' to rape 'em
Hide yo kids
Hide yo wife
and hide yo husband
cause they rapin' everyone out here.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzNhaLUT520

Lastly, Roll Tide.

Don't order or ask for a "soda", or a "pop"..you will look like I ginormous douchenozzle.  It's a  Coke....even if it's a Pepsi, it is still a "Coke"

Tea is sweetened.  In most places they have unsweetened tea for Yankees and heathens, but if you order iced tea, it will be sweet.

As others have said, we don't give a fuck how you did it in wherever you are from.  This is how we do it.

As already mentioned, be knowledgable about SEC Football and LOCAL High School sports.  Know how the teams are doing.  Go to a HS Football game on Friday nights.  People won't think you are an asshole Yankee if they see you supporting the local boys.

Barbecue is not grilling...lean the difference.  Know the difference.  

Define nearby? I don't know about in Huntsville, but my club would be about an hour drive.

https://www.facebook.com/NasaClub

Don't forget this:

They also have a minor league pro team (SPHL) and youth hockey if.you have kids that play.

There's no such thing as "unsweetened".

or this gem from Big Spring Park in downtown huntsville
struttin that ass
tl;dw crowd pick it up at about :50

Oh, we still have blue laws in places. So depending what part of the area you're moving to, you may have to plan ahead to have a beer on Sunday. But wine at Sunday brunch is a-okay. Guess Jesus would have done it that way too.

And we have dry counties. Cuz, you know, the devil and stuff.



I'd forgotten about that. More evidence: our local news stations are complete shit.

Look don't let anyone kid you.  Alabama is one hell of a great state to live in.  Yeah we catch a lot of crap on the national news and everyone likes to make fun of us and pretend that we are a bunch of sister-humping redneck, overall wearing hayseeds driving rusted pick-up trucks living in a single wide in the middle of a meth ridden trailer park.  

The truth is that's just Auburn and the rest of the state is doing really great.

Seriously though the state is awesome.  Huntsville is full of high-tech space industry and a bunch of fortune 300 defense companies have operations there.  The air is clean and the roadways in Huntsville were designed by Germans so they are efficient and don't snarl up as bad as they do in the rest of the state.  As has already been pointed out there are a ton of highly educated, well paid people in Huntsville.  If you're a single guy there are tons of tech hotie girls up there looking for some action.  If you're a family man you've picked a great place to do it too as the schools are excellent and the communities are really nice.  There are lots of neat places to eat - much more so than in Birmingham but that city isn't a slouch either.

Birmingham isn't bad either.  Despite its rep as "Bombingham" and the land of firehosing black people.  It's really a racially neutral place to live.  Most everyone gets along pretty well except for the agitators but no one pays that much attention to them anyway. The city's fame is UAB and its world famous medical community.  UAB is the cities largest employer and it has some incredibly competitive programs and nationally respected schools/labs.  There is also a burgeoning tech startup culture and an up & coming brew scene.  Best known for its formerly huge steel/iron industry Birmingham is covered up in manufacturing history.  There are lots of neat places to explore and Birmingham is in the process of revitalizing its inner city.  Great restaurants, public events and parks are now open and ready for visitors.  If you stumble outside of the city there is lots of green space to explore with excellent parks both north east and south.  Travel east by an hour and you'll find a great river system just begging to be explored.

Montgomery is our capital city and I don't know that much about it.  So I'll have to leave that one to someone who can expound on it.

We're glad that you are on your way down.  Let us know when you are here!

The upper part of the Elk River (up in TN) is nice to canoe and good fishing.

The word "shit"  can be as many as five syllables there.
The word "oil"  may be one syllable with no "i"  or "y"  sound in it.

Watch your cornhole Bud.

Tell yer soon-to-be new native brethren that you like lernin' far-in werds....

Mayonnaise......mayonnaise a bunch a good lookin wimmen here

And DO NOT go to Priceville in the spring or summer.......Specifically the spring
celebration or hell just stay away from ALL of the racking horse shows. I am only
telling you this to save you money. Don't let any of them ol boys talk you into
sittin' on God's gift to man - the Racking Horse - because you will be in love
with it.

Huntsville is Roll Tide country if I recall.....Joppa, Arab, & Hulaco are nothing
but good memories to me

Didj-eet-yet? Naw.... Yon't too? Aight....

How's ya momma and them?

I'll knock you terd-windin'.....

Y'all is plural & singular.....everybody understands what you mean

You will LOVE Alabammy....I always did. Enjoy your time there :)

The plural of "y'all" is "all y'all".

That's funny shit, right there.

People in the South can't drive.

The food is awesome.

Pro-gun billboards are a welcome change from the North.

Saying please and thank you will make your life much easier.

Yang-Kee!  The gentile ladyfolk of Dixie do NOT endeavor to use..Miracle Whip in our mamma's recipes.  Dukes I say, DUKE's is the proper ingredient to use.

You're going the wrong direction, always go North and West.

Southerners like dogs.  You should have three.

Name the William, Tecumseh, and Sherman.

Always call all three at once.

Only thing I can add is you might have to be more weather aware. Northeast Alabama seems to get more actual on the ground tornadoes than NW Alabama, and Northwest Georgia, and depending on the year, that could be any given month. Otherwise Roll Tide! Favorite ex boss, and good friend went there, so that is the side I picked.

Butler County is named after my grandmother's family.  At one time, they owned most of Conecuh County.

From what I remember, you order a coke.  Then they ask, "What kind of coke?"  Meaning.......pepsi, 7 UP, Sprite, Root beer, Fanta...........all pop is called Coke.

Watch Joe Dirt!

College football is the only real football.  Only minorities and other yankee transplants will care about the NFL.

Here's your Welcome mat....

All you need to know is the further south you go the more people desperately cling to their "starz-n-barz" and harp on the "waruh norvern 'gression'. Have fun.

The south lost, time to get over it.

Everything carbonated is coke, except beer.
Want a coke? Yea, get me a mountain dew.

Stupid Magellan fishing shirts are standard equipment for the living large 200% debt ratio construction contractors.

87% of self employed think they are construction contractors.

Corruption is king.....
Our state speaker of the house is facing 23 charges right now.