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Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:04:48 PM EDT
[#1]
whoops.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:06:58 PM EDT
[#2]
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Quoted:
whoops.
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Yo homie why you posting links to midget porn?

Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:07:35 PM EDT
[#3]
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Quoted:
FUBAR



I am not cool enough to double wield though
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Man, you're killing me

I'll never live that down


Me? The 30" Halligan in my trunk would do the job nicely ... or "one of" the FUBARs.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:09:46 PM EDT
[#4]
I have an old Easton fat barrel baseball bat I used when I was a kid. Would probably be pretty formidable. Not as sturdy as steel but should be fine for swinging at dead people.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:10:34 PM EDT
[#5]

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Quoted:
It would be just like me to manage to lop off three limbs and still get anklebit  



That's a good point, and a gray area in zombie lore-  how susceptible the undead brain is to intracranial pressure and other traumas that are less dramatic than decapitation or penetrating injuries.  To make the exercise useful I'd vote that zombie brains be moderately susceptible to blunt trauma and that they lean toward fast rather than slow.  But not that silly WWZ stuff.  



Polearms just seem like a bad idea for anything other than a fixed position with other weapons for backup.  



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Quoted:



Quoted:


...


 




It would be just like me to manage to lop off three limbs and still get anklebit  



That's a good point, and a gray area in zombie lore-  how susceptible the undead brain is to intracranial pressure and other traumas that are less dramatic than decapitation or penetrating injuries.  To make the exercise useful I'd vote that zombie brains be moderately susceptible to blunt trauma and that they lean toward fast rather than slow.  But not that silly WWZ stuff.  



Polearms just seem like a bad idea for anything other than a fixed position with other weapons for backup.  







 



i've had nightmares about exactly that, and i'm not kidding.




polearms would be great if the subject actually feared injury.  then the reach would be significant, because you could keep an opponent at a distance.  there's a reason the pollaxe and halberd were the most feared weapon of their day.  but zombies kill by impeding your mobility, and since a polearm wouldn't force them to keep their distance, they'd just keep crowding you until you couldn't swing anymore.




like i said, my choice would be the XVIIIb.  long enough to maintain some distance when possible, then half-swording once things got close.  but i still think the axe would be the best weapon for most people.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:13:55 PM EDT
[#6]
not edged.  sharpening a blade in the apocalypse, nobody got time for dat.

if I was along: indian war club.  Lacking that, ball peen hammer.

If I had a buddy or two I would have them use pitchforks to immobilize the zombie so I could rush in to deliver the blow to the head.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:15:24 PM EDT
[#7]
some good ideas presented already. whatever it is, it would have to be light, quick to employ, quick to strike, quick to recover, and not easily broken or stuck.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:15:25 PM EDT
[#8]
I saw a lirpa, but no bat'leth?



On a more serious note, anything from Zombie Tools.  Images not to scale with each other.  The last 2 pics are the katana/waksashi combo.

They make a bunch of tongue-in-cheek zombie killing weapons that are, from what I understand, really good blades.









Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:16:40 PM EDT
[#9]
I'd pick one or more of these.

Cold steel war hammer
Cold steel hand and a half sword
Randall bowie
SOG Jungle Warrior
PAL knife
Benchmade folder

Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:18:56 PM EDT
[#10]
Any weapon you need to swing is going to take considerable stamina to fight more than one or two. So, you better start working out now.

I worked at a chemical plant where we had 50 lb bags of granulated potassium which had to be broken up to load in packaging hoppers. It clumps up hard, worse than sugar.

So myself and another guy would take aluminum baseball bats and beat these bags to bust them up and toss them in the hoppers. Initially after three or four bags I started losing steam.

Beating things into submission is hard work.

Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:22:34 PM EDT
[#11]
Crowbar is good enough for Gordon Freeman, it's good enough for me.

Though I'd probably grab the chainsaw and just risk infection and be as crazy as Father Rasputin
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:23:12 PM EDT
[#12]
I would go with a mace of some sort.  Light, but heavy dense end on it.  No spice or anything.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:24:04 PM EDT
[#13]
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Quoted:
My ice axe is good enough for me.

My zombie plan involves getting drunk and shooting zombies from the roof until my rations run out.
View Quote



No, pick type weapons lead to getting the weapon stuck in the zombie.  This is also the case for many hammers, even using the hammer end you run a high chance of getting stuck.  You need to just cave it its head w/ a club and make a clean get away.  No pick, or blades.  

Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:26:27 PM EDT
[#14]


Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:29:53 PM EDT
[#15]
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Quoted:


Yo homie why you posting links to midget porn?

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Quoted:
Quoted:
whoops.


Yo homie why you posting links to midget porn?



Phew!!.... only midget pron? i thought it was a different one.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:30:03 PM EDT
[#16]
A mace or hammer, possibly an axe of some type.

A mace or hammer would be safer less chance of you accidentally infecting yourself. An axe would have a lot more utility especially if you had a fire axe.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:32:24 PM EDT
[#17]
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Quoted:



No, pick type weapons lead to getting the weapon stuck in the zombie.  This is also the case for many hammers, even using the hammer end you run a high chance of getting stuck.  You need to just cave it its head w/ a club and make a clean get away.  No pick, or blades.  

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Quoted:
Quoted:
My ice axe is good enough for me.

My zombie plan involves getting drunk and shooting zombies from the roof until my rations run out.



No, pick type weapons lead to getting the weapon stuck in the zombie.  This is also the case for many hammers, even using the hammer end you run a high chance of getting stuck.  You need to just cave it its head w/ a club and make a clean get away.  No pick, or blades.  


But you are also weight limited assuming no transport, therefore if you take an 8lb sword you still need another 4-6lb tool for utility.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:37:13 PM EDT
[#18]
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Quoted:
There is a story I read about a Bushi (samurai) who was insulted as he walked by a construction site. IIRC it was in the 1800s when the Bushi were not well regarded, hence the derogatory term samurai.

A fight ensued and dozens of the workers were killed and more wounded. I don't remember the exact numbers but it was a lot.

The fight was ruled self defense.

I wish I could remember more facts of the story. But, my point is, there's not much better of a weapon than a katana for use against numbers of relatively unarmed people. imho.
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people, not zombies.  swords dominated the battel field b/c they are better balanced and nimbler than axes/clubs but as lethal, though w/ higher cost & maintenance.  So, in a melee w/ otehr where where there is blocking and parrying etc involved, a sword can outclass these cheaper cruder weapons.  I am sure those contstruction workers were using improvised weapons, hammers, pry bars and such.  
ETA: also swords require MUCH more training to properly use, especially curved swords b/c it you twist them through the cut, the end pivots otu and bends and binds up in the guy, or worse puts a lateral bend in the blade.  So yeah, skill, cost, maintanance, delicacy.

But is the goal is to dispatch simply mindless ceatures in large numbers and w/o getting their blood on you,  club that can be weield one or tow handed is the best.


of course, being that "movement equals life" it might be better to use some variation of a halligan bar, fubar, breeching tool so that it can provide more value at other tasks for its weight cost.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:37:16 PM EDT
[#19]
I choose to travel light and nimble.






Ill take a good ol Louisville Slugger.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:38:13 PM EDT
[#20]

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Quoted:





But you are also weight limited assuming no transport, therefore if you take an 8lb sword you still need another 4-6lb tool for utility.
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Quoted:



Quoted:


...


But you are also weight limited assuming no transport, therefore if you take an 8lb sword you still need another 4-6lb tool for utility.




 
8# is ginormous.  think 3-3.5#.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:47:15 PM EDT
[#21]
Easton Thunderstick
1" diameter solid forged aluminum.  Weighs the same as a standard bat, but more sectional density, so it penetrates (smashes deeper).  Like a bat on steroids.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:49:01 PM EDT
[#22]
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Quoted:
Any weapon you need to swing is going to take considerable stamina to fight more than one or two. So, you better start working out now.

I worked at a chemical plant where we had 50 lb bags of granulated potassium which had to be broken up to load in packaging hoppers. It clumps up hard, worse than sugar.

So myself and another guy would take aluminum baseball bats and beat these bags to bust them up and toss them in the hoppers. Initially after three or four bags I started losing steam.

Beating things into submission is hard work.

View Quote


Getting in half decent shape really is the most useful and most underrated prep.  Even my own choice, a Busse, when swung for a couple of minutes straight will fatigue forearm muscles pretty quickly, then you have to switch hands, and the average basement dweller isn't well trained with their dominant hand let alone their NON-dominant hand.  

I think a lot of these issues (stuck weapons, loss of mobility, low lethality) likely go away when someone is well trained with a weapon.  Someone who's working on muscle memory has enough processor capacity available that they can think their way through some of these issues rather than getting tunnel visioned and panicked into a mistake.  Where we get into problems is when we say "what can I pick up and use effectively without any training".  Honestly a baseball bat might be the best answer to that question because it's a simple and familiar movement.  




Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:52:12 PM EDT
[#23]
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 6:52:53 PM EDT
[#24]
Brush axe
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 7:09:56 PM EDT
[#25]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


Getting in half decent shape really is the most useful and most underrated prep.  Even my own choice, a Busse, when swung for a couple of minutes straight will fatigue forearm muscles pretty quickly, then you have to switch hands, and the average basement dweller isn't well trained with their dominant hand let alone their NON-dominant hand.  

I think a lot of these issues (stuck weapons, loss of mobility, low lethality) likely go away when someone is well trained with a weapon.  Someone who's working on muscle memory has enough processor capacity available that they can think their way through some of these issues rather than getting tunnel visioned and panicked into a mistake.  Where we get into problems is when we say "what can I pick up and use effectively without any training".  Honestly a baseball bat might be the best answer to that question because it's a simple and familiar movement.  




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Quoted:
Quoted:
Any weapon you need to swing is going to take considerable stamina to fight more than one or two. So, you better start working out now.

I worked at a chemical plant where we had 50 lb bags of granulated potassium which had to be broken up to load in packaging hoppers. It clumps up hard, worse than sugar.

So myself and another guy would take aluminum baseball bats and beat these bags to bust them up and toss them in the hoppers. Initially after three or four bags I started losing steam.

Beating things into submission is hard work.



Getting in half decent shape really is the most useful and most underrated prep.  Even my own choice, a Busse, when swung for a couple of minutes straight will fatigue forearm muscles pretty quickly, then you have to switch hands, and the average basement dweller isn't well trained with their dominant hand let alone their NON-dominant hand.  

I think a lot of these issues (stuck weapons, loss of mobility, low lethality) likely go away when someone is well trained with a weapon.  Someone who's working on muscle memory has enough processor capacity available that they can think their way through some of these issues rather than getting tunnel visioned and panicked into a mistake.  Where we get into problems is when we say "what can I pick up and use effectively without any training".  Honestly a baseball bat might be the best answer to that question because it's a simple and familiar movement.  






Agree 100%.  And with the bat, I would stay with vertical  strikes on the heads of the Zs.  Like Zombie wack-a-mole.  Wouldn't work on the living, just zombies.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 7:12:27 PM EDT
[#26]
Halberd.

But really, any pole arm is the only correct answer for a primary melee weapon.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 7:16:17 PM EDT
[#27]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History



worked for freeman!

but I'm a big fan of crushing skulls with tools that can't get stuck, the club or mace.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 7:29:57 PM EDT
[#28]
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Quoted:
Swords is a bad choice, possible to get stuck in corpses or people, and have to get close to whatever you are trying to kill.  I'd rather have about a 5 foot spear with a pretty heavy pointed tip for penatration to quickly jab at eye sockets or any part of the head from a safer distance, for inside something heavy like a crowbar would be pretty efficent.
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I think a spear would be a good idea, maybe even six feet long or so. with a blade type tip to open them up some. in closer quarters
go to a short machete or a chopper of some kind. maybe something like the cold steel kukri or the columbia river chanceinhell.
If the spear store was closed, get a chunk of conduit, flatten one end and grind it into a point. it would be a cheap stabber that would
be easy to replace.

and remember, I`ll be riding around in my new brinks truck armored car to collect supplies.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 7:40:36 PM EDT
[#29]
Naginata and katana.

Link Posted: 11/23/2014 7:47:46 PM EDT
[#30]
Quoted:
In a zombie apocalypse, what would your weapon of choice be for melee'ing zombies?
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Machete or katana.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 7:48:43 PM EDT
[#31]
Out of what I have now?











Out of something not in my possesion




 
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 7:52:52 PM EDT
[#32]
One of these: Kukri or Smatchet.




Kukri with my own personal Gurkha sounds like the best option


Link Posted: 11/23/2014 8:01:25 PM EDT
[#33]

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Quoted:


My ice axe is good enough for me.



My zombie plan involves getting drunk and shooting zombies from the roof until my rations run out.
View Quote
Might be a really good choice.  Ice axes are super light.  First time I picked one I was shocked at how light it was.  It was almost nothing.  And I imagine they are super tough being made to cut into solid ice.



 
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 8:16:14 PM EDT
[#34]


Groovy.

Link Posted: 11/23/2014 8:42:00 PM EDT
[#35]
I am pretty fond of my Cold Steel War hammer.

If I had the coin for such luxuries, I would spring for a Halligan tool.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 8:54:51 PM EDT
[#36]
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Quoted:
One of these: Kukri or Smatchet.


http://i.imgur.com/INJa3pO.jpg

Kukri with my own personal Gurkha sounds like the best option


http://i.imgur.com/K2Y7oA7.jpg
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You don't get your own personal Gurkha.

Just the weapon.

If we could choose what dudes we would want along with it I would choose a T-1000 Terminator who is programmed to be my bodyguard.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 8:55:36 PM EDT
[#37]
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Bruce Campbell FTW.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 8:57:25 PM EDT
[#38]
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 8:58:25 PM EDT
[#39]

Link Posted: 11/23/2014 9:01:13 PM EDT
[#40]
Some of you guys would probably enjoy the DEAD ISLAND console game that came out about five years ago or so.

It's pretty much all about using melee weapons against zombies (only very few firearms are available in the game).
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 9:15:30 PM EDT
[#41]
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 9:16:16 PM EDT
[#42]
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 9:45:41 PM EDT
[#43]
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 9:45:51 PM EDT
[#44]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History


Riding in those was not fun.  When I first rode in a Marder I in Braunschweig with the 1st PzrGrd, I was spoiled.  Still, an M113 is better than zombies eating your legs.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 9:49:39 PM EDT
[#45]
for zombies?

something like this. never gets stuck in a corpse and plenty hefty to bust a head.

Link Posted: 11/23/2014 9:56:45 PM EDT
[#46]
Some type of polearm
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 9:57:25 PM EDT
[#47]
" />
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 10:03:20 PM EDT
[#48]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:

Self sharpen, are you being sarcastic? Nothing self sharpens. I'd go with a modern through hardened katana in CPM3V, with matching wakizashi.
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Quoted:
Quoted:
Good question.  I have a lot of options available, but would go with a short/long set of modern high carbon cutting katana.  

A halberd or hewing spear might be the ideal weapon, but it would be next to useless indoors, where even a full sixed katana is too long.


  Can't go wrong with the Katana. Don't they self sharpen? So it's a rather low maintenance weapon.

Self sharpen, are you being sarcastic? Nothing self sharpens. I'd go with a modern through hardened katana in CPM3V, with matching wakizashi.


A company I used to wor for did some laser heat  treating on lawn mower blades making them self sharpen.
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 10:03:20 PM EDT
[#49]


This would be ideal, 27oz. That way after I was done smashing undead heads, I could return to dropping bombs and hitting piss missiles back up the middle during league night!
Link Posted: 11/23/2014 10:09:48 PM EDT
[#50]
I think a lot would depend on the type of zombie apocalypse we are talking about.  Slow stupid Walking Dead zombies or crazy fast I Am Legend or World War Z zombies.  

Slower ones would be fine to take on with a Katana or blunt object but for anything fast I would want a firearm.  Probably a shotgun or bullpup, something easy to handle.
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