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Posted: 9/29/2014 10:28:38 PM EDT
[#1]
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I'm not going to throw out a laundry list of scenarios and deem them to be over the line or whatnot. But it is worth mentioning that breasts are not genitalia. So while some folks have thrown around the "sex act" label, I do not consider the touching of a breast a sex act. And with most things, context and intent is probably more a factor than the touching. Motorboating some stripper in a crowd of raucous dudes in a public club is a far cry from intimately engaging a woman's breasts in the midst of a sex act/coitus. So yes, the setting and the context are absolutely big factors when determining if "cheating" went on IMO. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Umm, no, you definitely have the wrong guy. But also, no, if wifey got a lap dance at a bachelorette party, my give-a-fuck meter would not budge. Huh, my apologies if I've mistaken you for someone else. Or if you are who I thought and I've misunderstood your thoughts on the matter. So do you not consider touching other people's sexual organs (in a clearly sexual context obviously, not OBGYN visits etc) to be sexual infidelity? Or is it just ok in your view given the context of a sex worker who's being paid for temporary entertainment? Where would you draw the line between "innocuous" sexual acts and something you would have an issue with? Not trolling here, I truly just don't get your position and I'm trying to understand. I'm not going to throw out a laundry list of scenarios and deem them to be over the line or whatnot. But it is worth mentioning that breasts are not genitalia. So while some folks have thrown around the "sex act" label, I do not consider the touching of a breast a sex act. And with most things, context and intent is probably more a factor than the touching. Motorboating some stripper in a crowd of raucous dudes in a public club is a far cry from intimately engaging a woman's breasts in the midst of a sex act/coitus. So yes, the setting and the context are absolutely big factors when determining if "cheating" went on IMO. I mean I understand what boobs are meant for...on the other hand I definitely get sexual gratification from playing with them...so yeah, it's a sex act IMO. |
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Posted: 9/29/2014 10:49:10 PM EDT
[#2]
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I wouldn't care if my girlfriend touched a male stripper's junk in the context of a bachelorette party. I'd strongly prefer she didn't tell me about it and would appreciate it if she made effort to make sure I didn't find out, but if I found out I wouldn't care. Why? Because she loves ME, plus I'm probably better looking and I know I can perform better than said stripper and I make 6-figures. She already has the best; I'm not worried. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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I just came back from Bangkok and Pattaya. Pattaya makes Bangkok's red light district look quaint and provincial. You can only imaging what happened there. Remind your fiancee that it could be worse. Oh, and... EJECT So next time I touch a male stripper's no no place, I can be all like "Pfftt... other girls are like totally doing DVDA, you should be grateful I'm only petting winkies." Let's see how far that gets me. I wouldn't care if my girlfriend touched a male stripper's junk in the context of a bachelorette party. I'd strongly prefer she didn't tell me about it and would appreciate it if she made effort to make sure I didn't find out, but if I found out I wouldn't care. Why? Because she loves ME, plus I'm probably better looking and I know I can perform better than said stripper and I make 6-figures. She already has the best; I'm not worried. Lol. |
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Posted: 9/29/2014 10:52:59 PM EDT
[#3]
Sounds uptight.
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Posted: 9/29/2014 11:45:53 PM EDT
[#5]
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I missed a page, didn't I? Quote HistoryQuoted:
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To some here their woman licking whipped cream off a stripper's cock doesn't count as cheating, so I doubt getting a lap dance would count. 
I missed a page, didn't I? Missed a thread.
http://www.ar15.com/forums/t_1_5/1656863_Does_this_count_as_cheating___Strippers_and_whipped_cream_.html |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 12:45:08 AM EDT
[#6]
Quote HistoryQuoted: So next time I touch a male stripper's no no place, I can be all like "Pfftt... other girls are like totally doing DVDA, you should be grateful I'm only petting winkies." Let's see how far that gets me. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: I just came back from Bangkok and Pattaya. Pattaya makes Bangkok's red light district look quaint and provincial. You can only imaging what happened there. Remind your fiancee that it could be worse. Oh, and... EJECT So next time I touch a male stripper's no no place, I can be all like "Pfftt... other girls are like totally doing DVDA, you should be grateful I'm only petting winkies." Let's see how far that gets me. Great answer, but help me out here: What the heck is DVDA? Do I even want to know, or is this something like Goatse or Lemon Party?  |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 1:16:29 AM EDT
[#7]
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2) IMO fiance's boundaries are too prudish. If OP is cool with em, fine, but it sounds like his boundaries are not in the exact same ballpark so if he proceeds, he will be disappointed. Doesn't matter what you think. Doesn't even matter what OP thinks. In this age of non-judgementalism, you calling her boundaries prudish is very judgmental. They are HERS, and both you and OP need to respect them. Saying her boundaries are "too prudish" puts your (or the OP's) prurient interests over her morals. Disregarding her thoughts & feelings on the issue becomes a rationale for running around on her. |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 1:20:14 AM EDT
[#8]
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I'm not going to throw out a laundry list of scenarios and deem them to be over the line or whatnot. But it is worth mentioning that breasts are not genitalia. So while some folks have thrown around the "sex act" label, I do not consider the touching of a breast a sex act. And with most things, context and intent is probably more a factor than the touching. Motorboating some stripper in a crowd of raucous dudes in a public club is a far cry from intimately engaging a woman's breasts in the midst of a sex act/coitus. So yes, the setting and the context are absolutely big factors when determining if "cheating" went on IMO. Question: In a marriage, is it understood that you will be "forsaking all others" (to use the traditional marriage vow?) What's the definition of "forsaking"? Seems to me like you're rationalizing "having a sexual encounter with someone not your wife" as not over the line. |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 8:17:23 AM EDT
[#9]
Some of these arguments are coming dangerously close to the ol, "I was drunk so it didn't count" or "It was just a one night stand----it doesn't count because it didn't mean anything" lines.
Are our actions to be judged based on how we *feel* in our own minds? |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 9:29:02 AM EDT
[#10]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Some of these arguments are coming dangerously close to the ol, "I was drunk so it didn't count" or "It was just a one night stand----it doesn't count because it didn't mean anything" lines. Are our actions to be judged based on how we *feel* in our own minds? I guarantee if a married woman had stuck her tits in a male dancer's face to be groped, a large percentage of the It's-Only-A-Tit crowd here would think it was cheating, and if she lied about having done it, they'd be yelling "EJECT" out of both sides of their mouths. |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 9:35:10 AM EDT
[#11]
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I guarantee if a married woman had stuck her tits in a male dancer's face to be groped, a large percentage of the It's-Only-A-Tit crowd here would think it was cheating, and if she lied about having done it, they'd be yelling "EJECT" out of both sides of their mouths. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Some of these arguments are coming dangerously close to the ol, "I was drunk so it didn't count" or "It was just a one night stand----it doesn't count because it didn't mean anything" lines. Are our actions to be judged based on how we *feel* in our own minds? I guarantee if a married woman had stuck her tits in a male dancer's face to be groped, a large percentage of the It's-Only-A-Tit crowd here would think it was cheating, and if she lied about having done it, they'd be yelling "EJECT" out of both sides of their mouths. You are clearly mistaken, Jane. I have been assured it's only a tit and therefore ok. In fact, some random guy in a bar or on the beach could cop a feel on their wives' tits, and that would be completely fine. It's just a tit, right? And of course, if the woman in question objects to such handling, they would certainly inform her that she's out of line because it's only a tit, right? Right? |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 10:10:29 AM EDT
[#12]
Quote HistoryQuoted: You are clearly mistaken, Jane. I have been assured it's only a tit and therefore ok. In fact, some random guy in a bar or on the beach could cop a feel on their wives' tits, and that would be completely fine. It's just a tit, right? And of course, if the woman in question objects to such handling, they would certainly inform her that she's out of line because it's only a tit, right? Right? Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Quoted: Some of these arguments are coming dangerously close to the ol, "I was drunk so it didn't count" or "It was just a one night stand----it doesn't count because it didn't mean anything" lines. Are our actions to be judged based on how we *feel* in our own minds? I guarantee if a married woman had stuck her tits in a male dancer's face to be groped, a large percentage of the It's-Only-A-Tit crowd here would think it was cheating, and if she lied about having done it, they'd be yelling "EJECT" out of both sides of their mouths. You are clearly mistaken, Jane. I have been assured it's only a tit and therefore ok. In fact, some random guy in a bar or on the beach could cop a feel on their wives' tits, and that would be completely fine. It's just a tit, right? And of course, if the woman in question objects to such handling, they would certainly inform her that she's out of line because it's only a tit, right? Right? Absolutly. So, what bar do you hang out at?
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Posted: 9/30/2014 11:41:46 AM EDT
[#13]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
You are clearly mistaken, Jane. I have been assured it's only a tit and therefore ok. In fact, some random guy in a bar or on the beach could cop a feel on their wives' tits, and that would be completely fine. It's just a tit, right? And of course, if the woman in question objects to such handling, they would certainly inform her that she's out of line because it's only a tit, right? Right? Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Some of these arguments are coming dangerously close to the ol, "I was drunk so it didn't count" or "It was just a one night stand----it doesn't count because it didn't mean anything" lines. Are our actions to be judged based on how we *feel* in our own minds? I guarantee if a married woman had stuck her tits in a male dancer's face to be groped, a large percentage of the It's-Only-A-Tit crowd here would think it was cheating, and if she lied about having done it, they'd be yelling "EJECT" out of both sides of their mouths. You are clearly mistaken, Jane. I have been assured it's only a tit and therefore ok. In fact, some random guy in a bar or on the beach could cop a feel on their wives' tits, and that would be completely fine. It's just a tit, right? And of course, if the woman in question objects to such handling, they would certainly inform her that she's out of line because it's only a tit, right? Right? Right...until a mom needs to nurse her baby. Then that "just a tit" becomes something forbidden that must be kept private and hidden at all costs. |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 11:46:52 AM EDT
[#14]
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You are clearly mistaken, Jane. I have been assured it's only a tit and therefore ok. In fact, some random guy in a bar or on the beach could cop a feel on their wives' tits, and that would be completely fine. It's just a tit, right? And of course, if the woman in question objects to such handling, they would certainly inform her that she's out of line because it's only a tit, right? Right? Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Some of these arguments are coming dangerously close to the ol, "I was drunk so it didn't count" or "It was just a one night stand----it doesn't count because it didn't mean anything" lines. Are our actions to be judged based on how we *feel* in our own minds? I guarantee if a married woman had stuck her tits in a male dancer's face to be groped, a large percentage of the It's-Only-A-Tit crowd here would think it was cheating, and if she lied about having done it, they'd be yelling "EJECT" out of both sides of their mouths. You are clearly mistaken, Jane. I have been assured it's only a tit and therefore ok. In fact, some random guy in a bar or on the beach could cop a feel on their wives' tits, and that would be completely fine. It's just a tit, right? And of course, if the woman in question objects to such handling, they would certainly inform her that she's out of line because it's only a tit, right? Right? I think the operating assumption here is not that it's ok for a woman to do it, but more that strippers aren't really human. Just untermenschen. A pretty common attitude towards sex workers, really. It's why they are the only group one can still make "jokes" about raping and murdering on mainstream tv and not hear an outcry. 
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Posted: 9/30/2014 12:09:02 PM EDT
[#15]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I think the operating assumption here is not that it's ok for a woman to do it, but more that strippers aren't really human. Just untermenschen. A pretty common attitude towards sex workers, really. It's why they are the only group one can still make "jokes" about raping and murdering on mainstream tv and not hear an outcry. |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 12:13:36 PM EDT
[#16]
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haha you old guys are thinking because he grabbed a strippers tits that the wedding is off? WTF are you supposed to do with a stripper? If that's the extent of it, then you did ABSOLUTELY nothing wrong. There is a time and place for everything, and a bachelor party is it. . . . . as another poster referenced "strippers are fine, fucking whores is not" This, except, what the fuck do you mean by "you old guys"? |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 12:22:17 PM EDT
[#17]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I think the operating assumption here is not that it's ok for a woman to do it, but more that strippers aren't really human. Just untermenschen. A pretty common attitude towards sex workers, really. It's why they are the only group one can still make "jokes" about raping and murdering on mainstream tv and not hear an outcry. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
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Some of these arguments are coming dangerously close to the ol, "I was drunk so it didn't count" or "It was just a one night stand----it doesn't count because it didn't mean anything" lines. Are our actions to be judged based on how we *feel* in our own minds? I guarantee if a married woman had stuck her tits in a male dancer's face to be groped, a large percentage of the It's-Only-A-Tit crowd here would think it was cheating, and if she lied about having done it, they'd be yelling "EJECT" out of both sides of their mouths. You are clearly mistaken, Jane. I have been assured it's only a tit and therefore ok. In fact, some random guy in a bar or on the beach could cop a feel on their wives' tits, and that would be completely fine. It's just a tit, right? And of course, if the woman in question objects to such handling, they would certainly inform her that she's out of line because it's only a tit, right? Right? I think the operating assumption here is not that it's ok for a woman to do it, but more that strippers aren't really human. Just untermenschen. A pretty common attitude towards sex workers, really. It's why they are the only group one can still make "jokes" about raping and murdering on mainstream tv and not hear an outcry. Oh, hell, SomeMen here in GD don't think women in general are really human. They are, instead, an inferior sub-species, a problem to be solved, the remote control for the household appliances, a life support system for a vagina, and whom, except for the latter, they would hunt with dogs. |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 12:26:11 PM EDT
[#18]
I still really can't believe so many people think it's ok to fondle a stripper's tits even though his fiancee is clearly not cool with it.
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Posted: 9/30/2014 12:29:08 PM EDT
[#19]
Those that spout "eject" will die lonely and are just looking for the easy way out, as with most challenges they face probably. Or are just plain young'ns. Committed to only themselves. Women in general are insecure, you just need to talk (yes yes, I know) too her and then shag the heck outta her for a day or two and all will be better - and stronger. Step up and make her understand - it will soon be your full time job to do this anyway so get to practicing.
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Posted: 9/30/2014 12:30:46 PM EDT
[#20]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Some of these arguments are coming dangerously close to the ol, "I was drunk so it didn't count" or "It was just a one night stand----it doesn't count because it didn't mean anything" lines. Are our actions to be judged based on how we *feel* in our own minds? Welcome to the world of moral relativism. |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 12:31:00 PM EDT
[#21]
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I still really can't believe so many people think it's ok to fondle a stripper's tits even though his fiancee is clearly not cool with it. Can't condemn others for things they do themselves. But don't worry, when they get divorced it'll be their wife's fault... |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 12:32:26 PM EDT
[#22]
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Welcome to the world of moral relativism. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Some of these arguments are coming dangerously close to the ol, "I was drunk so it didn't count" or "It was just a one night stand----it doesn't count because it didn't mean anything" lines. Are our actions to be judged based on how we *feel* in our own minds? Welcome to the world of moral relativism. Indeed. I've often thought it must be exhausting to not have any kind of real moral or ethical framework, just an endless stream of shifting situations and your own feels about them. |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 12:47:34 PM EDT
[#23]
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This... Even though it sucks sometimes, she hogs all the action. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Eject. Find a wife that likes to go to strip clubs with you. This... Even though it sucks sometimes, she hogs all the action. The worst is that during a lap dance she can touch the dancer, but I can't... that is so wrong |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 6:30:11 PM EDT
[#24]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I guarantee if a married woman had stuck her tits in a male dancer's face to be groped, a large percentage of the It's-Only-A-Tit crowd here would think it was cheating, and if she lied about having done it, they'd be yelling "EJECT" out of both sides of their mouths. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Some of these arguments are coming dangerously close to the ol, "I was drunk so it didn't count" or "It was just a one night stand----it doesn't count because it didn't mean anything" lines. Are our actions to be judged based on how we *feel* in our own minds? I guarantee if a married woman had stuck her tits in a male dancer's face to be groped, a large percentage of the It's-Only-A-Tit crowd here would think it was cheating, and if she lied about having done it, they'd be yelling "EJECT" out of both sides of their mouths. Double standard. We have some real poster children here for the BOYS vs. REAL MEN. Then they want to whine when their marriages and weddings and relationships don't last. Will use some of these post in my adult behavioral development class. I think we have some billboard material here. Thanks again to the real men in this thread. For the rest of you...You will become the classic case study for numerous and varying types of developmental issues.  Thank you for the material. |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 7:34:37 PM EDT
[#25]
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I still really can't believe so many people think it's ok to fondle a stripper's tits even though his fiancee is clearly not cool with it. A spouse or GF is an adversary. The point is to win. (Or to avoid getting beat too bad, if you're beta.) |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 10:49:43 PM EDT
[#26]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Indeed. I've often thought it must be exhausting to not have any kind of real moral or ethical framework, just an endless stream of shifting situations and your own feels about them. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Some of these arguments are coming dangerously close to the ol, "I was drunk so it didn't count" or "It was just a one night stand----it doesn't count because it didn't mean anything" lines. Are our actions to be judged based on how we *feel* in our own minds? Welcome to the world of moral relativism. Indeed. I've often thought it must be exhausting to not have any kind of real moral or ethical framework, just an endless stream of shifting situations and your own feels about them. Not exhausting at all, because the benefit of moral relativism is I can justify anything. Just look at this thread. I've got a Y chromosome, you BET I wouldn't mind a woman shoving her naughty bits in my face and lap. But what about those inconvenient promises I made to the woman I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life with? Just wave them away with some rationale that "it's not penetration, so it's not sex!" BOOM--guilt-free motorboating! It's actually harder to have standards and stick to them. |
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Posted: 9/30/2014 10:51:24 PM EDT
[#27]
I'm kinda behind on this thread. Did OP Eject? Did pics ever surface?
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Posted: 9/30/2014 11:13:55 PM EDT
[#28]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Not exhausting at all, because the benefit of moral relativism is I can justify anything. Just look at this thread. I've got a Y chromosome, you BET I wouldn't mind a woman shoving her naughty bits in my face and lap. But what about those inconvenient promises I made to the woman I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life with? Just wave them away with some rationale that "it's not penetration, so it's not sex!" BOOM--guilt-free motorboating! It's actually harder to have standards and stick to them. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: Some of these arguments are coming dangerously close to the ol, "I was drunk so it didn't count" or "It was just a one night stand----it doesn't count because it didn't mean anything" lines. Are our actions to be judged based on how we *feel* in our own minds? Welcome to the world of moral relativism. Indeed. I've often thought it must be exhausting to not have any kind of real moral or ethical framework, just an endless stream of shifting situations and your own feels about them. Not exhausting at all, because the benefit of moral relativism is I can justify anything. Just look at this thread. I've got a Y chromosome, you BET I wouldn't mind a woman shoving her naughty bits in my face and lap. But what about those inconvenient promises I made to the woman I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life with? Just wave them away with some rationale that "it's not penetration, so it's not sex!" BOOM--guilt-free motorboating! It's actually harder to have standards and stick to them. It is in short supply these days. |
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Posted: 10/1/2014 5:03:00 PM EDT
[#29]
I have been married 3 times and never had a bachelor party or a stripper.
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Posted: 10/2/2014 8:20:35 PM EDT
[#30]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I have been married 3 times and never had a bachelor party or a stripper. It doesn't count if you are married to three women at the same time. |
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Posted: 10/3/2014 4:13:32 AM EDT
[#31]
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It doesn't count if you are married to three women at the same time. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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I have been married 3 times and never had a bachelor party or a stripper. It doesn't count if you are married to three women at the same time. Only one at a time, MrsWind wants a wife for us, but NJ hasn't made polygamy legal yet. |
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