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Posted: 8/26/2014 8:36:50 PM EDT

[#1]

I've never been to Bangladesh

Posted: 8/26/2014 8:56:03 PM EDT

[#2]

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Quoted:
I once had to tell a Korean War vet to stand fast once to get him to stop defecating. He thought he was done but he wasn't. Cleaned him up when he finished though.

I held a Vietnam vet's hand till he died so he wouldn't die alone. He had family the county over but they wouldn't come.

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You are a good man!

Posted: 8/27/2014 12:31:30 AM EDT

[#3]

Things are ment for a reason.

Posted: 8/27/2014 2:50:38 AM EDT

[#4]

I've been cancer free for over four years. Fuck cancer

A couple of weeks ago I opened the rear hatch of a car I hadn't driven in a while. When the hatch swung up I was nose to nose with a yellow jacket nest about a foot from my face. Those bastards were PISSED, and judging by the number of welts on my chest, neck, and face I got stung seventeen times before getting away. A can of brake cleaner killed the winged demons, and the fork end of a Halligan detached the nest from the inside of the hatch. I then monkey stomped the nest into the driveway. Fuck yellow jackets.

Posted: 8/27/2014 3:01:28 AM EDT

[#5]

There is a piece of a plastic spoon lodged in my eye. I was about 8-10 years old, being a kid, and snapped the plastic spoon I was eating with in half. I knew nothing about it until I was 17 and had an eye exam.

I still have perfect vision

Posted: 8/27/2014 5:18:42 AM EDT

[#6]

Quote History

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While hitchhiking cross-country at 18 years old I almost got mixed up in a murder in Texarkana. We never found the guy. I woke up in a cheap hotel room, the car was gone, the guy had checked out and settled up the bill, so I didn't owe anything.

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My Hometown is a scary place! i.e. The Town that Dreaded Sundown

Posted: 8/27/2014 5:27:49 AM EDT

[#7]

I lost my top two front teeth while playing football at recess in the 6th grade. A friend of mine and I were both running for the ball and somehow I ended up biting the top of his head... I cought the ball though!

Now those teeth are just caps.

Posted: 8/27/2014 6:46:35 AM EDT

[#8]

Quote History

Quoted:
Males on my fathers side have a genetic mutation that makes us immune to all forms of hepatitis.

This hepatitis immunity is usually only limited to the Hep A virus and is usually not sexually dimorphic.

None of the females on my dad side have the immunity and as far as we can tell the mutation goes back as far as my great grandfather.

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CD81/CR2 deficient?

Posted: 8/27/2014 8:17:05 AM EDT

[#9]

I my dog is family and I would risk my life to protect her.

Posted: 8/27/2014 8:22:08 AM EDT

[#10]

20 years ago I survived a knife attack from a girlfriends tweaker ex.

I got cut pretty bad on the forearm and it hurts most of the time now.

Posted: 8/27/2014 8:36:47 AM EDT

[#11]

I've been in the same job for 24 years. ..
I have no idea what I'm doing.

Posted: 8/27/2014 8:56:14 AM EDT

[#12]

When I was working, I always envied people who understood what they did for a living.

Posted: 8/27/2014 9:12:18 AM EDT

[#13]

I once jumped off of a bridge into the Hudson River, from about 60 feet up. I didn't cross my ankles, and I pulled both my groin muscles. Walked like an old man for a couple weeks.

Posted: 8/27/2014 9:28:48 AM EDT

[#14]

My left elbow has never been touched my left hand

Posted: 8/27/2014 9:29:57 AM EDT

[#15]

Quote History

Quoted:
I've been in the same job for 24 years. ..
I have no idea what I'm doing.

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Pretty high up in management?

Posted: 8/27/2014 9:31:14 AM EDT

[#16]

Quote History

Quoted:
I've been in the same job for 24 years. ..
I have no idea what I'm doing.

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I've been in the same job for 34 years and I have no idea what you are doing either.

Posted: 8/27/2014 9:47:57 AM EDT

[#17]

Quote History

Quoted:
Somehow, after breaking my leg and being on convalescent leave for a month, my chain of command wants to nominate me for sailor of the quarter.

I just don't think that what I did the 2 months that I wasn't broken will be enough to seal the deal.

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It will be if everybody else in your command F'd up!

Posted: 8/27/2014 10:02:58 AM EDT

[#18]

Quote History

Quoted:
It will be if everybody else in your command F'd up!

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Quote History

Quoted:

Quoted:

Somehow, after breaking my leg and being on convalescent leave for a month, my chain of command wants to nominate me for sailor of the quarter.

I just don't think that what I did the 2 months that I wasn't broken will be enough to seal the deal.

It will be if everybody else in your command F'd up!

True that. Sometimes the best idea is just to no do anything. There's always the potential to make a situation worse.

Posted: 8/27/2014 10:04:53 AM EDT

[#19]

I have a large scar on my right butt cheek from hip surgery when I was 2.

Posted: 8/27/2014 10:13:52 AM EDT

[#20]

I was killed by a shark in Sharknado 2

Posted: 8/27/2014 10:41:12 AM EDT

[#21]

Quote History

Quoted:
I have a large scar on my right butt cheek from hip surgery when I was 2.

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Dayum!

I thought that was a picture of your head!

Posted: 8/27/2014 10:43:52 AM EDT

[#22]

I am smarter and more mature than I act on this site.

Posted: 8/27/2014 10:46:04 AM EDT

[#23]

I'm old and broken.

Posted: 8/27/2014 10:56:36 AM EDT

[#24]

I wouldn't give Joan Rivers and her entourage free admission so they turned around and left.

Posted: 8/27/2014 11:18:06 AM EDT

[#25]

I enlisted in the Army at 37 did one tour in Afghanistan.

Posted: 8/27/2014 11:20:20 AM EDT

[#26]

I am a world recognised FPGA / SoC expert ;)

Posted: 8/27/2014 11:24:26 AM EDT

[#27]

Quote History

Quoted:
I was killed by a shark in Sharknado 2

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Wait. Seriously?

Posted: 8/27/2014 11:28:00 AM EDT

[#28]

Up till a year ago, I played bass in two bands simultaneously. Upright bass in a bluegrass band, and a '73 Jazz in a cover/dance band.

Both broke up within a month of each other.

I have more time to shoot, now.

Posted: 8/27/2014 11:32:20 AM EDT

[#29]

Once I borke up with a girl I had been dating for awhile and one night standed a random girl I met at a party. The Ex randomly met a guy and did the same thing. I found out later that the girl I met was his wife. Odd.

Posted: 8/27/2014 11:42:14 AM EDT

[#30]

Fact: It's my fucking birthday

Posted: 8/27/2014 11:48:47 AM EDT

[#31]

Quote History

Quoted:
Fact: It's my fucking birthday

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Well, 'Happy (vernacular for sexual intercourse) Birthday!"

Posted: 8/27/2014 11:52:23 AM EDT

[#32]

Quote History

Quoted:

Well, 'Happy (vernacular for sexual intercourse) Birthday!"

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Quoted:

Quoted:
Fact: It's my fucking birthday

Well, 'Happy (vernacular for sexual intercourse) Birthday!"

Thanks

Posted: 8/27/2014 11:55:17 AM EDT

[#33]

I once spent 3 days in Jail in the Middle East

Posted: 8/27/2014 12:12:20 PM EDT

[#34]

When I met my girlfriend's dad, I found out he is an arfcommer, but got banned from GD for some reason

Posted: 8/27/2014 12:12:28 PM EDT

[#35]

I was on a ride along and the first unit to respond at the school when Buford Furrow walked in and shot the place up. The Sgt handed me the shotgun and asked if i knew how to use it. He then told me if he gets shot shoot to kill. Furrow was already gone and on his way to shooting the mail carrier down the street as we cleared the school. It was a scene I will never forget.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Los_Angeles_Jewish_Community_Center_shooting

Posted: 8/27/2014 12:12:49 PM EDT

[#36]

I've gone 13 months now without a left leg.

Posted: 8/27/2014 12:51:44 PM EDT

[#37]

I'm bored.

Posted: 8/27/2014 1:28:10 PM EDT

[#38]

Quote History

Quoted:
I once jumped off of a bridge into the Hudson River, from about 60 feet up. I didn't cross my ankles, and I pulled both my groin muscles. Walked like an old man for a couple weeks.

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Running from .......

See my entry

Your lucky to have lived as was I

Posted: 8/27/2014 1:30:23 PM EDT

[#39]

I'm a Cuban with syndactyly feet (webbed toes); two on my left and three on my right. Dan Aykroyd, Ashton Kutcher, Tricia Helfer (Battlestar Galactica's Number 6), and Joseph Stalin have syndactyly toes.

Here are some older pics from a gear thread showing my toes.

Posted: 8/27/2014 1:31:44 PM EDT

[#40]

Quote History

Quoted:
I'm a Cuban with syndactyly feet (webbed toes); two on my left and three on my right. Dan Aykroyd, Ashton Kutcher, Tricia Helfer (Battlestar Galactica's Number 6), and Joseph Stalin have syndactyly toes.
Here are some older pics from a gear thread showing my toes.

http://i995.photobucket.com/albums/af78/miami_jbt/100_0913.jpg?t=1283795269
http://i995.photobucket.com/albums/af78/miami_jbt/100_0914.jpg?t=1283795265

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Just use a knife, it'll only hurt once.

Posted: 8/27/2014 1:32:56 PM EDT

[#41]

Quote History

Quoted:

Just use a knife, it'll only hurt once.

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Quote History

Quoted:

Quoted:

I'm a Cuban with syndactyly feet (webbed toes); two on my left and three on my right. Dan Aykroyd, Ashton Kutcher, Tricia Helfer (Battlestar Galactica's Number 6), and Joseph Stalin have syndactyly toes.

Here are some older pics from a gear thread showing my toes.

http://i995.photobucket.com/albums/af78/miami_jbt/100_0913.jpg?t=1283795269

http://i995.photobucket.com/albums/af78/miami_jbt/100_0914.jpg?t=1283795265

Just use a knife, it'll only hurt once.

And loose my Super Human Cuban swimming powers! Are you nuts?

Posted: 8/27/2014 1:44:00 PM EDT

[#42]

Quote History

Quoted:

I currently own 2 firearms, and 33 microphones.

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Crazy, I've got two turntables and one microphone.

Posted: 8/27/2014 1:44:45 PM EDT

[#43]

I have a weird habit of nibbling on the left side of my tongue.

Posted: 8/27/2014 1:45:05 PM EDT

[#44]

Quote History

Quoted:

And loose my Super Human Cuban swimming powers! Are you nuts?

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Quote History

Quoted:

Quoted:
I'm a Cuban with syndactyly feet (webbed toes); two on my left and three on my right. Dan Aykroyd, Ashton Kutcher, Tricia Helfer (Battlestar Galactica's Number 6), and Joseph Stalin have syndactyly toes.
Here are some older pics from a gear thread showing my toes.

http://i995.photobucket.com/albums/af78/miami_jbt/100_0913.jpg?t=1283795269
http://i995.photobucket.com/albums/af78/miami_jbt/100_0914.jpg?t=1283795265

Just use a knife, it'll only hurt once.

And loose my Super Human Cuban swimming powers! Are you nuts?

Is waterworld your most favorite film

Posted: 8/27/2014 1:45:22 PM EDT

[#45]

Quote History

Quoted:

Crazy, I've got two turntables and one microphone.

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Quoted:

Quoted:
I currently own 2 firearms, and 33 microphones.

Crazy, I've got two turntables and one microphone.

All you need is a DJ. Maybe Deej can help you out.

Posted: 8/27/2014 1:55:46 PM EDT

[#46]

1979 four foot dive into three feet of lake compression facture c 4&5 actuly drowned an a cousin did CPR on me got me back. Paralized from the neck down for 8 weeks back at my job in six months. I was very lucky.

Posted: 8/27/2014 2:11:59 PM EDT

[#47]

when i was in high school... they let the seniors drive school buses as a part time job...... my bus driver was 18 years old, and would slow down to 5-10mph and make the jehovia witness kid jump from the bus at his house.... and make him run and leap into the bus like indiana jones when he was picked up every morning.

serious... west montgomery high school, Mt, Gilead north carolina in the 1980's.

Posted: 8/27/2014 2:16:18 PM EDT

[#48]

Quote History

Quoted:
I'm a Cuban with syndactyly feet (webbed toes); two on my left and three on my right. Dan Aykroyd, Ashton Kutcher, Tricia Helfer (Battlestar Galactica's Number 6), and Joseph Stalin have syndactyly toes.
Here are some older pics from a gear thread showing my toes.

http://i995.photobucket.com/albums/af78/miami_jbt/100_0913.jpg?t=1283795269
http://i995.photobucket.com/albums/af78/miami_jbt/100_0914.jpg?t=1283795265

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Were you in Waterworld?

Posted: 8/27/2014 2:17:28 PM EDT

[#49]

Quote History

Quoted:
when i was in high school... they let the seniors drive school buses as a part time job...... my bus driver was 18 years old, and would slow down to 5-10mph and make the jehovia witness kid jump from the bus at his house.... and make him run and leap into the bus like indiana jones when he was picked up every morning.

serious... west montgomery high school, Mt, Gilead north carolina in the 1980's.

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I find that funnier than I should....