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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:37:25 PM EDT
so got a random text message from a guy i work with.....he looked my cell # up on work's alpha roster. pretty sure this dude is either going to try and rape me or wants me to bang his wife. should i fo?
editing fail lol. i editing out the phone # and most of the address. i googled it and its a new construction home. Im def getting the weird vibe here. ETA my replies are in green....obviously 
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:39:01 PM EDT
[#1]
Yea man you gone get butt fucked.
I'm sure all of your friends look forward to seeing you in the SAPR classes. |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:39:58 PM EDT
[#2]
That's some mighty gay texting you're doing there son...
He and his friends are going to make you do one of these:  |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:40:03 PM EDT
[#3]
In before the surprise buttsex...
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:40:17 PM EDT
[#4]
 |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:40:21 PM EDT
[#5]
Bring LOTS of lube.
Oh and dibs on all your stuff. 
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:40:58 PM EDT
[#6]
I hope you like roofi coladas.
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:41:33 PM EDT
[#7]
I'm sure it will be fine. Be sure to bring some imitation crab meat and a fruit plate. Does your friend like model trains?
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:41:35 PM EDT
[#8]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
In before the surprise buttsex... Or maye it's NOT a surprise and the OP enjoys ass sex? |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:41:36 PM EDT
[#9]
Dibs on kidneys.
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:42:14 PM EDT
[#10]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Dibs on kidneys. Fuck, while we're at it I'll take the liver
 |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:42:41 PM EDT
[#11]
And is your friend from TN? Thats an east TN area code FWIW.
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:42:42 PM EDT
[#12]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I hope you like roofi coladas. This. |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:43:06 PM EDT
[#13]
I wouldn't go there alone.
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:43:10 PM EDT
[#14]
Florida wins again....
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:43:21 PM EDT
[#15]
You're already getting raped, you just havn't noticed it yet.
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:45:38 PM EDT
[#16]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
And is your friend from TN? Thats an east TN area code FWIW. I can hear the banjos playing now. |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:45:50 PM EDT
[#17]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Florida wins again.... hey now im in NC currently. |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:46:58 PM EDT
[#18]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
hey now im in NC currently. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Florida wins again.... hey now im in NC currently. So dude's your cousin? |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:47:00 PM EDT
[#19]
Quote HistoryQuoted: You're already getting raped, you just havn't noticed it yet. |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:47:05 PM EDT
[#20]
After that, OP will be familiar with the term "airtight".
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:47:57 PM EDT
[#21]
Your coworker seems like a wet blanket.
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:52:34 PM EDT
[#22]
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:52:37 PM EDT
[#23]
Stick a go-pro on your head and fo, come back here and upload footage if something goes down.
He might just be extremely weird, I know I met plenty of weirdos while I was in. |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:56:08 PM EDT
[#24]
Looketh over there. *butt fucked* So endeth the joke.
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:56:42 PM EDT
[#25]
Quote HistoryQuote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
You're already getting raped, you just havn't noticed it yet. That's fucking great. OP is in Florida. So long, OP. |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:58:53 PM EDT
[#26]
Just be sure to put up a good fight. Otherwise, it won't seem so much like rape when you sober up and you might turn ghey.
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Posted: 7/31/2014 1:59:36 PM EDT
[#27]
Sounds like a little bup bup bup bup.
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:02:08 PM EDT
[#28]
You text like a 13 year old girl, and you are going to get made airtight.
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:02:57 PM EDT
[#29]
Which side of the convo isn't gay?
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:04:36 PM EDT
[#30]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
This. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
I hope you like roofi coladas. This. If you like roofi coladas and getting raped in the rain And the feel of the buttsecks with a whole lot of pain If you like making love at midnight and me in a cape You're the man I've looked for, come with me and escape |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:06:57 PM EDT
[#31]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I hope you like roofi colonics coladas. FIFY. |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:09:13 PM EDT
[#32]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Which side of the convo isn't gay? dont hate brah. 
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:09:59 PM EDT
[#33]
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:11:30 PM EDT
[#34]
If you have to even ask that question, the answer is yes.
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:14:35 PM EDT
[#35]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Yea man you gone get butt fucked. I'm sure all of your friends look forward to seeing you in the SAPR classes. First post has it pegged...
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:14:36 PM EDT
[#36]
"They're good people you don't gotta worry"
Sounds legit. |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:15:45 PM EDT
[#37]
No. Technically it's not rape because you know what's about to happen and are going to head over there anyway. |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:18:46 PM EDT
[#38]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
"They're good people you don't gotta worry" Sounds legit. my thoughts exactly. hell after i finish grilling these burgers im gonna recon the area. unfortunately im TAD here so all i have is my P30 and my Ruger SR-22. hopefully its a house full of big booty carolina girls and not a sausage fest waiting on the guest of honor
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:22:34 PM EDT
[#39]
 Quote HistoryQuoted:
If you like roofi coladas and getting raped in the rain And the feel of the buttsecks and a whole lot of pain If you like making love at midnight with me in a cape You're the man I've looked for, come with me and escape Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
I hope you like roofi coladas. This. If you like roofi coladas and getting raped in the rain And the feel of the buttsecks and a whole lot of pain If you like making love at midnight with me in a cape You're the man I've looked for, come with me and escape |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:23:56 PM EDT
[#40]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
my thoughts exactly. hell after i finish grilling these burgers im gonna recon the area. unfortunately im TAD here so all i have is my P30 and my Ruger SR-22. hopefully its a house full of big booty carolina girls and not a sausage fest waiting on the guest of honor Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
"They're good people you don't gotta worry" Sounds legit. my thoughts exactly. hell after i finish grilling these burgers im gonna recon the area. unfortunately im TAD here so all i have is my P30 and my Ruger SR-22. hopefully its a house full of big booty carolina girls and not a sausage fest waiting on the guest of honor If you are anywhere near Camp Lejune/Cherry Point be prepared to be massively disapointed. |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:26:36 PM EDT
[#41]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
In before the surprise buttsex... By this point it really shouldn't be a surprise. 
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:30:19 PM EDT
[#42]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
If you are anywhere near Camp Lejune/Cherry Point be prepared to be massively disapointed. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
"They're good people you don't gotta worry" Sounds legit. my thoughts exactly. hell after i finish grilling these burgers im gonna recon the area. unfortunately im TAD here so all i have is my P30 and my Ruger SR-22. hopefully its a house full of big booty carolina girls and not a sausage fest waiting on the guest of honor If you are anywhere near Camp Lejune/Cherry Point be prepared to be massively disapointed. 
looks legit 
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:33:08 PM EDT
[#43]
So, what you're really saying is you naturally give off a "gay vibe".
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:37:03 PM EDT
[#44]
Quote HistoryQuote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
"They're good people you don't gotta worry" Sounds legit. my thoughts exactly. hell after i finish grilling these burgers im gonna recon the area. unfortunately im TAD here so all i have is my P30 and my Ruger SR-22. hopefully its a house full of big booty carolina girls and not a sausage fest waiting on the guest of honor If you are anywhere near Camp Lejune/Cherry Point be prepared to be massively disapointed. http://i58.tinypic.com/doucua.png looks legit woah hold on there, what's going on with that wallpaper back there? |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:41:00 PM EDT
[#45]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
woah hold on there, what's going on with that wallpaper back there? Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
"They're good people you don't gotta worry" Sounds legit. my thoughts exactly. hell after i finish grilling these burgers im gonna recon the area. unfortunately im TAD here so all i have is my P30 and my Ruger SR-22. hopefully its a house full of big booty carolina girls and not a sausage fest waiting on the guest of honor If you are anywhere near Camp Lejune/Cherry Point be prepared to be massively disapointed. http://i58.tinypic.com/doucua.png looks legit woah hold on there, what's going on with that wallpaper back there? Bastard tried to sneak that in so he doesn't look gay. 
IBTL |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:44:38 PM EDT
[#46]
"What should I wear?"
"Oh, it don' matter, it's jist gonna be the two of us." |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:45:54 PM EDT
[#47]
Quote HistoryQuote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: You're already getting raped, you just havn't noticed it yet.   |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:48:43 PM EDT
[#48]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I can hear the banjos playing now. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
And is your friend from TN? Thats an east TN area code FWIW. I can hear the banjos playing now. PADDLE FASTER!! |
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:53:57 PM EDT
[#49]
8 more years of living in Florida and then I can laugh like the rest of you.
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Posted: 7/31/2014 2:58:00 PM EDT
[#50]
video games? X-Box?
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