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Posted: 6/4/2014 5:16:59 PM EDT
No gun battles, no fight scenes, only one "boobs" scene.

But still one of the best movie I've seen since it came out.
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:20:08 PM EDT
[#1]
The retarded kid who wins peoples' hearts?  Not interested.
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:20:50 PM EDT
[#2]
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Quoted:
The retarded kid who wins peoples' hearts?  Not interested.
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Heartless bastard.





Awesome review here:   http://www.ruthlessreviews.com/1693/simon-birch/


Simon Birch. I saw this cinematic monstrosity several years ago (in the theater, proving I have always been a masochist at heart), and it has never left me, either in thought or emotion. Take Ian Michael Smith as Simon, easily the most offensive creature to grace the screen since Freaks left theaters. At least Billy Barty and Michael Dunn had charm (and talent); this little fecal stool is all bluff and bluster passing as acting. Oh, but isn’t he cute? I would answer in the negative with a certainty usually reserved for my unyielding attachment to a godless universe, but even if he were, that does not excuse his obnoxious behavior. He kisses girls, disrupts church with inane questions, and always, ALWAYS has to be the center of attention. I suppose it is understandable to be acting out, given that he is on the verge of puberty and knows that his cocktail pickle of a penis will never see anything except the inside of his deformed hand, but I simply would not tolerate the implicit theme of this film – he is a dwarf, hence lovable, and must be forgiven for everything he does. Message rejected.



Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:22:38 PM EDT
[#3]
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:25:27 PM EDT
[#4]
It was supposed to be a film about Irving's novel, "A Prayer for Owen Meany",  which is a great read by the way.

Never saw the movie when I found out it was only vaguely going to be based on some parts of the book.
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:30:17 PM EDT
[#5]


Fabulous film.

Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:36:53 PM EDT
[#6]
Does he get shot out of a cannon in the movie?  
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:37:42 PM EDT
[#7]
That was actually a really good movie.
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:42:20 PM EDT
[#8]
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Quoted:
Does he get shot out of a cannon in the movie?  
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If memory serves, I believe that he is thrown against a Velcro wall
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:43:13 PM EDT
[#9]
No, it's not. It's melodramatic soft-focus golden hour popcorn pablum.
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:46:55 PM EDT
[#10]
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Quoted:
No, it's not. It's melodramatic soft-focus golden hour popcorn pablum.
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I don't know what that means. Can I masturbate to it?
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:49:00 PM EDT
[#11]
Ashley Judd was freaking hot in this movie.  I might even dare to say that that movie was her peak (looks wise.)
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:49:55 PM EDT
[#12]
For some reason I have passed on watching this every time it's on cable.
If you like movies with midgets, watch Saint John of Las Vegas. ..I think its a great movie, along with Killing Zelda Sparks and Live Free or Die, no these last 2 don't have midgets.
Watch "Saint John Of Las Vegas - Official Trailer [HD]" on YouTube
Saint John Of Las Vegas - Official Trailer [HD]: http://youtu.be/MSKXGUxUN8U
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:49:59 PM EDT
[#13]
was a great movie. Haven't seen it in years.
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:51:41 PM EDT
[#14]
I have a Simon Birch hood ornament. I didn't see him in the street
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:54:01 PM EDT
[#15]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Ashley Judd was freaking hot in this movie.  I might even dare to say that that movie was her peak (looks wise.)
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Nope. Heat beats this movie in that respect as well.
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:54:35 PM EDT
[#16]
cocktail pickle of a penis will never see anything except the inside of his deformed hand
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I lol'd
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:56:05 PM EDT
[#17]
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Quoted:
Ashley Judd was freaking hot in this movie.  I might even dare to say that that movie was her peak (looks wise.)
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Didn't that little ass hole kill her with a baseball?
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 5:56:41 PM EDT
[#18]
I don't know about the movie, but watching GD rabidly slaughter anything offered in a thread as "the best" is pretty damn entertaining.
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 6:03:48 PM EDT
[#19]
Who runs Bartertown?
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 6:10:33 PM EDT
[#20]
Know what else is a good movie? Bicentennial Man. Have tissues handy, the DVD case has a lot of dust in it.
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 6:50:15 PM EDT
[#21]
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 7:05:14 PM EDT
[#22]
I remember seeing that.  It was a really good show, been years since I have watched it.
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 7:33:22 PM EDT
[#23]
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Quoted:


I lol'd
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Quoted:
cocktail pickle of a penis will never see anything except the inside of his deformed hand


I lol'd


I'm still laughing at that
Link Posted: 6/4/2014 7:37:33 PM EDT
[#24]
must be a smart little fucker. he's currently enrolled at M.I.T





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