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Posted: 6/3/2014 8:33:14 AM EDT
Daily Mail UK  28 May 2012

First Lady Michelle Obama has agreed to sponsor a future submarine named after her home state that will be staffed by an all-female crew.

The White House has announced that Mrs Obama has accepted an invitation to be the backer of the USS Illinois, a Virginia-class submarine being built in Groton, Connecticut, and Newport News, Virginia.

The new nuclear-powered boat is expected to join the fleet in late 2015.

It will cost about $2.7 billion to build the USS Illinois. The boat is being constructed by Northrop Grumman Shipbuilding in partnership with General Dynamics/Electric Boat Corp., according to a Defense Department press release cited by the Chicago Tribune.

When completed, the submarine will be 377 feet long, will weigh 7,800 tons and will be able to operate at more than 25 knots when submerged.

In her role as a sponsor, the First Lady will be involved in the life of the submarine and establish a special relationship with the ship's sailors and their families.    -end snip-

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2151366/Michelle-Obama-sponsors-ALL-FEMALE-nuclear-submarine-named-home-state-Illinois.html






Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:35:06 AM EDT
[#1]
What, seriously?

It sounds like a Hollywood script.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:35:09 AM EDT
[#2]
It's going to have to be the biggest sub ever to house enough toilet paper for an all female crew.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:35:36 AM EDT
[#3]






Oh that is going to be smelling horrible in a couple of weeks.






Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:36:01 AM EDT
[#4]
All female?  That thing will crash sure as shit.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:36:03 AM EDT
[#5]
Do we really need another $2,700,000,000 submarine?
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:36:15 AM EDT
[#6]
Maybe superior officers will control the weapons systems 1 week out of the month while the sub is deployed?
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:37:57 AM EDT
[#7]
the USS Illinois, a Virginia-class submarine
View Quote


I had to re-read that, I thought it said a "virgin-class" submarine
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:38:08 AM EDT
[#8]
Is this from The Onion?
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:38:15 AM EDT
[#9]
Gotta be fake.....the Navy would never agree to that!!!!!!!!
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:38:17 AM EDT
[#10]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
What, seriously?

It sounds like a Hollywood script.
View Quote

I thought this was The Onion...
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:39:07 AM EDT
[#11]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
All female?  That thing will crash sure as shit.
View Quote

Maybe, just maybe, they won't try backing it up
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:40:14 AM EDT
[#12]
When will we have an all transgender submarine?

I demand equality.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:40:27 AM EDT
[#13]
So when is it going to get backed into the pier?
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:41:05 AM EDT
[#14]
Something about chumming the water...
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:41:06 AM EDT
[#15]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
All female?  That thing will crash sure as shit.
View Quote

Maybe, but they will have amazing sandwiches.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:42:13 AM EDT
[#16]
Two year old article...
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:42:18 AM EDT
[#17]
Largest can of sardines ever conceived by man.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:42:39 AM EDT
[#18]
Canned tuna!
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:42:57 AM EDT
[#19]
My god. If that crew gets synchronized and that boat doesn't stay in port 25% of the time, there will be no mercy on the high seas.

ETA: No seaman on board!
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:43:19 AM EDT
[#20]
If women aren't currently serving on subs, where will they find officers and CPOs to run the ship?
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:45:52 AM EDT
[#21]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Maybe superior officers will control the weapons systems 1 week out of the month while the sub is deployed?
View Quote


It is a known fact that when females live with each other their times of the month sync up thus the whole crew will be having that week at the same time!
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:46:18 AM EDT
[#22]
in related news, every couple of weeks the Illinois pulls into random harbors and asks directions....
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:46:29 AM EDT
[#23]
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:46:54 AM EDT
[#24]
Uh, PCU Illinois (SSN-786) already has a crew.

It's CO is a guy.

Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:47:27 AM EDT
[#25]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
It's going to have to be the biggest sub ever to house enough toilet paper for an all female crew.
View Quote



And tampon dispensers in every corner of the fucking thing.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:47:32 AM EDT
[#26]
I hope the sub doesn't ever hit anything. If it does, that's the definition of irony.

Well you don't have to worry about anyone getting pregnant.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:47:49 AM EDT
[#27]
Once a month all of the missiles will launch and no one will know why. Being it is the navy it will turn up pregnant and on maternity leave 8 months after being deployed
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:48:10 AM EDT
[#28]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
So when is it going to get backed into the pier?
View Quote


I don't know, but I read another article that said it will be all tongue in groove construction.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:48:17 AM EDT
[#29]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
My god. If that crew gets synchronized and that boat doesn't stay in port 25% of the time, there will be no mercy on the high seas.

ETA: No seaman on board!
View Quote


I was thinking the exact same thing. That sub is gonna be very angry and irritable for one week every month!
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:48:50 AM EDT
[#30]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Do we really need another $2,700,000,000 submarine?
View Quote


Yes.

They're replacing the old 688 boats, and the Virginia is probably the best DoD acquisition program in existance.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:49:36 AM EDT
[#31]
Hmmmm.  Don't chicks in close proximity for extended periods (no pun intended) tend to have their cycles sync up?



Gee, an entire nuclear sub having PMS at one time, what could go wrong?






Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:50:40 AM EDT
[#32]
That is one submarine I would NOT want to challenge if they're pissed off!
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:51:20 AM EDT
[#33]

Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
I don't know, but I read another article that said it will be all tongue in groove construction.
View Quote View All Quotes
View All Quotes
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:



Quoted:

So when is it going to get backed into the pier?





I don't know, but I read another article that said it will be all tongue in groove construction.
Much lulz.

 
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:51:21 AM EDT
[#34]
Sounds like the makings of a terrible porn flick.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:51:29 AM EDT
[#35]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Canned tuna!
View Quote

Smells like fish.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:51:56 AM EDT
[#36]
If they paint it white it will look like a giant tampon when the mooring lines are on it.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:52:06 AM EDT
[#37]
Why does that sound like sexual discrimination?

What if your a guy who feels like a women and wears panties, can you be on the tuna sub then?
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:52:19 AM EDT
[#38]
So it's long, hard, and NOT full of seamen?

Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:52:20 AM EDT
[#39]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Do we really need another $2,700,000,000 submarine?
View Quote


Yes, quite a few more actually....
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:52:33 AM EDT
[#40]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


I had to re-read that, I thought it said a "virginVagina-class" submarine
View Quote View All Quotes
View All Quotes
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
the USS Illinois, a Virginia-class submarine


I had to re-read that, I thought it said a "virginVagina-class" submarine


FIFY
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:52:47 AM EDT
[#41]
The Blood Sub.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:52:56 AM EDT
[#42]

Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


Sounds like the makings of a terrible porn flick.
View Quote
Or a sci fi channel movie.



 
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:53:05 AM EDT
[#43]
To find the sub, just follow the sharks.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:53:46 AM EDT
[#44]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
in related news, every couple of weeks the Illinois pulls into random harbors and asks directions....
View Quote

Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:54:22 AM EDT
[#45]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Two year old article...
View Quote



My bad.  Still funny.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:54:43 AM EDT
[#46]
The USS Red Tide, has a nice ring to it.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:54:50 AM EDT
[#47]
So. Much. Scissoring.
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:57:02 AM EDT
[#48]
Whole new meanings to "load the torpedo tubes".
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:57:24 AM EDT
[#49]
Yay for segregation?  Is this supposed to be a good thing?  
Link Posted: 6/3/2014 8:57:50 AM EDT
[#50]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
To find the sub, just follow the sharks.
View Quote

I lol'd
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