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Qweevox
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:13:10 PM
[Last Edit: 4/22/2014 8:26:51 PM by Qweevox]
I'm going to put a few videos up. The first is a trailer for this film released in January 2014, and the second is a great interview with the filmmaker. I know there are lots of threads here in GD about the subject of Child Support, and Divorce, but there are few solutions ever offered, other then don't get married, or don't get divorced.

It doesn't have to be this way. Check it out, and pass it on.


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Extorris
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:17:00 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By Qweevox:
I'm going to put a few videos up. The first is a trailer for this film released in January 2014, and the second is a great interview with the filmmaker. I know there are lots of threads here in GD about the subject of Child Support, and Divorce, but there are few solutions ever offered, other then don't get married........

Works for me.
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4Kilo12
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:18:19 PM
"Family Court" is the biggest travesty to befall the American way
i dont like small cars or real big women, but somehow i always find myself in em
StevenH
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:20:08 PM
in California if you have children Family court wont let you get a divorse unless you have lawyers. its "for the children"

Also have alimony for life once married 10-years.
Qweevox
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:20:26 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By 4Kilo12:
"Family Court" is the biggest travesty to befall the American way

Family Court is a $50 Billion dollar industry in the United States.
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Qweevox
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:21:58 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By StevenH:
in California if you have children Family court wont let you get a divorse unless you have lawyers. its "for the children"

Also have alimony for life once married 10-years.

Those are remnants from a time that woman were viewed as something between children and adults. The courts took the stand to "protect" them, like they would children.
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Qweevox
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:23:13 PM
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Qweevox
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:24:57 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By StevenH:
in California if you have children Family court wont let you get a divorse unless you have lawyers. its "for the children"

Also have alimony for life once married 10-years.


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tower44
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:30:58 PM
lawyers are bottom feeders
1cheapshot
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:32:26 PM
After I paid 1000. for a lawyer to show up and do literally nothing and watch me get screwed, I said F this, I'm doing it my self. I still lost but at least I felt like I was heard and I was fighting. That was the first round. Took her to court later for custody, by myself (because she was being stupid) and I got custody of my son. I went on line and found a fathers advocate that I paid about a grand to for information. The info wasn't even that good at the time, but what it did do, was show me fathers can fight and win. That was worth what I paid for.

Your public library and the net are your best sources. Get to the family law sections and start reading.

I always said two people can have an amicable divorce until one of them gets a lawyer.


2minkey
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:33:12 PM
[Last Edit: 4/12/2014 2:33:43 PM by 2minkey]
poor choices lead to family court.
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ad_nauseam
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:34:38 PM
Great post OP.
4Kilo12
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:35:48 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By 2minkey:
poor choices lead to family court.


nice edit
i dont like small cars or real big women, but somehow i always find myself in em
Qweevox
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:36:12 PM
Some of you might be interested in this....





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BTccw
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:37:40 PM
Im in for the butthurt cause I don't have anything else to be pissed off about right now.
Shoot til your target changes shape or catches fire!
2minkey
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:49:30 PM
[Last Edit: 4/12/2014 2:49:52 PM by 2minkey]
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By 4Kilo12:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
poor choices lead to family court.


nice edit


thanks.

interesting how it is the court, not the folks who fucked up their marriages and whatnot, that is at fault.

remind me to blame the DMV the next time i crash my car into a phone pole.

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OnlineAllTheTime
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:49:57 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By BTccw:
Im in for the butthurt cause I don't have anything else to be pissed off about right now.



There's a fairly contentious hair dye thread going on if you want to get in on that one too.
It was either that or crazy demon faces and, honestly, the vaginas were just more fun.------Myself. >_<
StarJumper
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:50:56 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By 2minkey:
poor choices lead to family court.


Please explain.
maggiethecat
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Posted: 4/12/2014 2:53:25 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By StevenH:
in California if you have children Family court wont let you get a divorse unless you have lawyers. its "for the children"

.



dont see how thats legal
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BTccw
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:00:19 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By OnlineAllTheTime:
Originally Posted By BTccw:
Im in for the butthurt cause I don't have anything else to be pissed off about right now.



There's a fairly contentious hair dye thread going on if you want to get in on that one too.



In on that one too thanks!
Shoot til your target changes shape or catches fire!
StevenH
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:01:01 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By 4Kilo12:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
poor choices lead to family court.


nice edit


thanks.

interesting how it is the court, not the folks who fucked up their marriages and whatnot, that is at fault.

remind me to blame the DMV the next time i crash my car into a phone pole.



A spouse, unlike your car, does not come with a warranty covering defects.
2minkey
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:03:32 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By StevenH:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By 4Kilo12:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
poor choices lead to family court.


nice edit


thanks.

interesting how it is the court, not the folks who fucked up their marriages and whatnot, that is at fault.

remind me to blame the DMV the next time i crash my car into a phone pole.



A spouse, unlike your car, does not come with a warranty covering defects.


yeah, so what? would you like a marriage warranty from uncle sugar???
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Qweevox
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:10:48 PM
[Last Edit: 4/12/2014 3:12:32 PM by Qweevox]
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By StevenH:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:

thanks.

interesting how it is the court, not the folks who fucked up their marriages and whatnot, that is at fault.

remind me to blame the DMV the next time i crash my car into a phone pole.



A spouse, unlike your car, does not come with a warranty covering defects.


yeah, so what? would you like a marriage warranty from uncle sugar???

About half of all marriages in the Western world end in divorce. That's not at issue here. There are countries that don't involve attorneys in the dissolution of marriage, or for things like child support. Their divorce rate is just as bad as ours, but they don't feed a $50 billion bureaucratic monster tearing each other apart in public.

There is another way.


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Mister-Z
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:13:14 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By OnlineAllTheTime:
Originally Posted By BTccw:
Im in for the butthurt cause I don't have anything else to be pissed off about right now.



There's a fairly contentious hair dye thread going on if you want to get in on that one too.


Is that heating up? I haven't gone there yet, subject matter seemed of little interest.
But if the purses are swinging, it may be time to go visit.



Re: the OP, a buddy of mine got into a dispute with his wife, law got involved.
He's told me with 100% certainty that the "process" destroyed his marriage and family and that had they not been forced into the process, that all was completely salvageable.
Let us speak courteously, deal fairly, and keep ourselves armed and ready. -Theodore Roosevelt

Tactical_Jew
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:19:48 PM
if you have kids, pay up.

if your wife stayed at home and raised the kids while you worked, pay up.

easy.
StevenH
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:22:35 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By Tactical_Jew:
if you have kids, pay up.

if your wife stayed at home and raised the kids while you worked, pay up.

easy.


Thats pretty simplistic.

If you chose to stay home rather than work and you get divorced, step up and get a job. Its not 1950.
SilentType
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:23:07 PM
[Last Edit: 4/12/2014 3:23:47 PM by SilentType]
What a BUNCH of BULLSHIT.

Blame everyone, but yourself huh? Why not? That's the American way I guess. The real truth is though that a divorce is only as costly and expensive as the parties make it. If you are going to fight over an equitable distribution of marital assets and fight over the children than that's on you and your soon to be ex spouse. At any time during a divorce the complaining party can withdraw their complaint in most jurisdictions.

Don't blame the courts. Don't blame the lawyers. You need someone to blame look in the mirror.

MovinMan
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:25:02 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By 4Kilo12:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
poor choices lead to family court.


nice edit


thanks.

interesting how it is the court, not the folks who fucked up their marriages and whatnot, that is at fault.

remind me to blame the DMV the next time i crash my car into a phone pole.







Wow.....what a stupid analogy.

It takes two people to keep a marriage together. You could be Ghandi and your wife could still fuck you over...or vice versa.

To use your analogy, you would have to assume that telephone poles can jump out in front of you and then when it happens, the DMV gets involved between you and you insurance company and fucks everything up to leave you broke and homeless.
War is when your government tells you who the enemy is. Revolution is when you figure it out for yourself.
StevenH
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:25:27 PM
[Last Edit: 4/12/2014 3:26:36 PM by StevenH]
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By SilentType:
What a BUNCH of BULLSHIT.

Blame everyone, but yourself huh? Why not? That's the American way I guess. The real truth is though that a divorce is only as costly and expensive as the parties make it. If you are going to fight over an equitable distribution of marital assets and fight over the children than that's on you and your soon to be ex spouse. At any time during a divorce the complaining party can withdraw their complaint in most jurisdictions.

Don't blame the courts. Don't blame the lawyers. You need someone to blame look in the mirror.



In California (if you have children) you do not have the option of comming to an agreement of an equitable distribution of marital assets and child custody/support. You must each have a lawyer, "for the Children." Whichever spouse makes more money pays for both lawyers.
MovinMan
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:28:00 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By SilentType:
What a BUNCH of BULLSHIT.

Blame everyone, but yourself huh? Why not? That's the American way I guess. The real truth is though that a divorce is only as costly and expensive as the parties make it. If you are going to fight over an equitable distribution of marital assets and fight over the children than that's on you and your soon to be ex spouse. At any time during a divorce the complaining party can withdraw their complaint in most jurisdictions.

Don't blame the courts. Don't blame the lawyers. You need someone to blame look in the mirror.




Lemme guess, you're a divorce attorney?

And just how the fuck are you supposed to control the actions of the other party? You could try to be as reasonable as possible but if the other party is out for blood you are fucked.

Jesus, some serious lack of critical skills thinking going on here.

War is when your government tells you who the enemy is. Revolution is when you figure it out for yourself.
Tactical_Jew
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:29:30 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By StevenH:
Originally Posted By Tactical_Jew:
if you have kids, pay up.

if your wife stayed at home and raised the kids while you worked, pay up.

easy.


Thats pretty simplistic.

If you chose to stay home rather than work and you get divorced, step up and get a job. Its not 1950.

even if agreed on by the couple?

its not simplistic. The system works. I just think people abuse and stir up shit to get back at each other.
AL25
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:30:58 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By maggiethecat:
Originally Posted By StevenH:
in California if you have children Family court wont let you get a divorse unless you have lawyers. its "for the children"

.



dont see how thats legal


Because lawyers are the ones who draft the laws.
Qweevox
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:32:02 PM
Doctors of bureaucracy make out like bandits on the insane complexity.


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StevenH
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:32:19 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By Tactical_Jew:
Originally Posted By StevenH:
Originally Posted By Tactical_Jew:
if you have kids, pay up.

if your wife stayed at home and raised the kids while you worked, pay up.

easy.


Thats pretty simplistic.

If you chose to stay home rather than work and you get divorced, step up and get a job. Its not 1950.

even if agreed on by the couple?


Yes. No person owes another person anything. We have the ability to get a job and pay our own way. Had i decided to not work and instead spend my days taking care of the kids, maintaining the house, shooting guns and working out I would still expect to have to get a job and pay my own bills if the marraige did not work.
2minkey
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:33:19 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By Qweevox:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By StevenH:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:

thanks.

interesting how it is the court, not the folks who fucked up their marriages and whatnot, that is at fault.

remind me to blame the DMV the next time i crash my car into a phone pole.



A spouse, unlike your car, does not come with a warranty covering defects.


yeah, so what? would you like a marriage warranty from uncle sugar???

About half of all marriages in the Western world end in divorce. That's not at issue here. There are countries that don't involve attorneys in the dissolution of marriage, or for things like child support. Their divorce rate is just as bad as ours, but they don't feed a $50 billion bureaucratic monster tearing each other apart in public.

There is another way.



yeah, okay, whatever.

the family court nonsense is something that happens when people make poor choices and live in an overly legalistic and petty culture.

the family court is a symptom, not the disease.

i know it's de rigueur to blame to gov for everything here. it must be. otherwise all the whining legions would have to consider the idea that they are responsible for their own outcomes.

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2minkey
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:35:47 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By MovinMan:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By 4Kilo12:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
poor choices lead to family court.


nice edit


thanks.

interesting how it is the court, not the folks who fucked up their marriages and whatnot, that is at fault.

remind me to blame the DMV the next time i crash my car into a phone pole.




http://www.memecreator.org/static/images/memes/644965.jpg


Wow.....what a stupid analogy.

It takes two people to keep a marriage together. You could be Ghandi and your wife could still fuck you over...or vice versa.

To use your analogy, you would have to assume that telephone poles can jump out in front of you and then when it happens, the DMV gets involved between you and you insurance company and fucks everything up to leave you broke and homeless.


yeah, right... if you made a poor choice of spouse, that isn't anyone else's fault.
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StevenH
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:37:27 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By Qweevox:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By StevenH:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:

thanks.

interesting how it is the court, not the folks who fucked up their marriages and whatnot, that is at fault.

remind me to blame the DMV the next time i crash my car into a phone pole.



A spouse, unlike your car, does not come with a warranty covering defects.


yeah, so what? would you like a marriage warranty from uncle sugar???

About half of all marriages in the Western world end in divorce. That's not at issue here. There are countries that don't involve attorneys in the dissolution of marriage, or for things like child support. Their divorce rate is just as bad as ours, but they don't feed a $50 billion bureaucratic monster tearing each other apart in public.

There is another way.



yeah, okay, whatever.

the family court nonsense is something that happens when people make poor choices and live in an overly legalistic and petty culture.

the family court is a symptom, not the disease.

i know it's de rigueur to blame to gov for everything here. it must be. otherwise all the whining legions would have to consider the idea that they are responsible for their own outcomes.



Really?

http://www.ar15.com/forums/t_1_5/1612968_Son_in_law_hit_my_daughter.html

So if your spouse cheats, becomes a drunk addict, criminal, assults you, ect its your fault?

Or maybe the court system should be set up in a way that protects the wronged party from being victimized twice, once by the spouse and then by the family court.
StevenH
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:39:09 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By MovinMan:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By 4Kilo12:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
poor choices lead to family court.


nice edit


thanks.

interesting how it is the court, not the folks who fucked up their marriages and whatnot, that is at fault.

remind me to blame the DMV the next time i crash my car into a phone pole.




http://www.memecreator.org/static/images/memes/644965.jpg


Wow.....what a stupid analogy.

It takes two people to keep a marriage together. You could be Ghandi and your wife could still fuck you over...or vice versa.

To use your analogy, you would have to assume that telephone poles can jump out in front of you and then when it happens, the DMV gets involved between you and you insurance company and fucks everything up to leave you broke and homeless.


yeah, right... if you made a poor choice of spouse, that isn't anyone else's fault.


How long have you been able to predict the future behavior and future mental health of other people? Have you found a way to profit from that superpower yet?
2minkey
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:45:36 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By StevenH:

So if your spouse cheats, becomes a drunk addict, criminal, assults you, ect its your fault?

Or maybe the court system should be set up in a way that protects the wronged party from being victimized twice, once by the spouse and then by the family court.


it's certainly a lot more 'your' fault than it is the gov's fault.

sorry you feel like a victim. there is help available.

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2minkey
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:48:09 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By StevenH:

How long have you been able to predict the future behavior and future mental health of other people? Have you found a way to profit from that superpower yet?


it's much simpler than that.

if i get myself into a situation, it my responsibility to get myself out of it.

life isn't that hard if you use your brains and don't let your dick drag you around.

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Usagi
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:49:38 PM
It's funny to see who in here has actually seen the family courts at work, and who hasn't.

Hint: the video links are DEAD ON.
StevenH
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:49:52 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By StevenH:

So if your spouse cheats, becomes a drunk addict, criminal, assults you, ect its your fault?

Or maybe the court system should be set up in a way that protects the wronged party from being victimized twice, once by the spouse and then by the family court.


it's certainly a lot more 'your' fault than it is the gov's fault.

sorry you feel like a victim. there is help available.



Oh I've been lucky. Ive been married over 20-years and hope to be until I die. But it is largely the result of luck. Ive seen hundreds destroyed financially not by their own actions but by the actions of the spouse and a flawed family court system.

StevenH
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:51:02 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By Usagi:
It's funny to see who in here has actually seen the family courts at work, and who hasn't.

Hint: the video links are DEAD ON.



Ive only been there as a witness and its insane.
Desdinova721
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Posted: 4/12/2014 3:59:28 PM
I'm never getting married. Saw enough bullshit when I was in the army to know I never want to risk going through that. As far as I'm concerned, let the gays have it.
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LHD
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Posted: 4/12/2014 4:14:54 PM
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By 4Kilo12:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
poor choices lead to family court.


nice edit


thanks.

interesting how it is the court, not the folks who fucked up their marriages and whatnot, that is at fault.

remind me to blame the DMV the next time i crash my car into a phone pole.




Wow. Talk about missing the point.
LHD
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Posted: 4/12/2014 4:15:25 PM
[Last Edit: 4/12/2014 4:15:54 PM by LHD]
Double tap.
2minkey
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Posted: 4/12/2014 4:21:48 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By LHD:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By 4Kilo12:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
poor choices lead to family court.


nice edit


thanks.

interesting how it is the court, not the folks who fucked up their marriages and whatnot, that is at fault.

remind me to blame the DMV the next time i crash my car into a phone pole.




Wow. Talk about missing the point.


i fully realize the point is to blame something external for your own problems. but thanks anyway.
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LHD
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Posted: 4/12/2014 4:31:18 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By LHD:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By 4Kilo12:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
poor choices lead to family court.


nice edit


thanks.

interesting how it is the court, not the folks who fucked up their marriages and whatnot, that is at fault.

remind me to blame the DMV the next time i crash my car into a phone pole.




Wow. Talk about missing the point.


i fully realize the point is to blame something external for your own problems. but thanks anyway.


Yeah no. You have another person, who could develop some sort of mental illness, or react poorly to menopause or react to one of thousands of other stimulus that causes behavioral changes; and at no direct fault of your own be straddled with crippling debt for the rest of your life. We're not just talking about Vegas marriages here, we're talking about people who are married for years. I have no idea how old you are but let's assume you're 40. Are you the same person at 40 that you were at 16 or 25 or will be at 65? The answer is no. If you fail to see how that can complicate your ideal of marriage then I'm going to ask you to use your fingers to show me how many chromosomes you think are normal.
2minkey
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Posted: 4/12/2014 5:18:45 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By LHD:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:


i fully realize the point is to blame something external for your own problems. but thanks anyway.


Yeah no. You have another person, who could develop some sort of mental illness, or react poorly to menopause or react to one of thousands of other stimulus that causes behavioral changes; and at no direct fault of your own be straddled with crippling debt for the rest of your life. We're not just talking about Vegas marriages here, we're talking about people who are married for years. I have no idea how old you are but let's assume you're 40. Are you the same person at 40 that you were at 16 or 25 or will be at 65? The answer is no. If you fail to see how that can complicate your ideal of marriage then I'm going to ask you to use your fingers to show me how many chromosomes you think are normal.


hah hah chromosomes you funny. i don't know, such a hard question.

and, like, OMG, why do bad things happen to good people?




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A-Mart
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Posted: 4/12/2014 5:22:08 PM
[Last Edit: 4/12/2014 5:23:31 PM by A-Mart]
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By Qweevox:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By StevenH:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:

thanks.

interesting how it is the court, not the folks who fucked up their marriages and whatnot, that is at fault.

remind me to blame the DMV the next time i crash my car into a phone pole.



A spouse, unlike your car, does not come with a warranty covering defects.


yeah, so what? would you like a marriage warranty from uncle sugar???

About half of all marriages in the Western world end in divorce. That's not at issue here. There are countries that don't involve attorneys in the dissolution of marriage, or for things like child support. Their divorce rate is just as bad as ours, but they don't feed a $50 billion bureaucratic monster tearing each other apart in public.

There is another way.





So you're mad because people hire lawyers when they get divorces? Admittedly I couldn't watch the video yet, but from what I'm gathering, the whole point of this Family Court reform is to shift blame from the people who want divorces onto the court system. Everyone wants a scapegoat.
LHD
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Posted: 4/12/2014 5:22:23 PM
[Jump To Reply]Originally Posted By 2minkey:
Originally Posted By LHD:
Originally Posted By 2minkey:


i fully realize the point is to blame something external for your own problems. but thanks anyway.


Yeah no. You have another person, who could develop some sort of mental illness, or react poorly to menopause or react to one of thousands of other stimulus that causes behavioral changes; and at no direct fault of your own be straddled with crippling debt for the rest of your life. We're not just talking about Vegas marriages here, we're talking about people who are married for years. I have no idea how old you are but let's assume you're 40. Are you the same person at 40 that you were at 16 or 25 or will be at 65? The answer is no. If you fail to see how that can complicate your ideal of marriage then I'm going to ask you to use your fingers to show me how many chromosomes you think are normal.


hah hah chromosomes you funny. i don't know, such a hard question.

and, like, OMG, why do bad things happen to good people?

http://media.vcstar.com/media/img/photos/2011/10/13/1420111013130420001_t607.JPG




Excellent response. I accept your surrender.
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