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Posted: 11/28/2012 8:55:13 PM EDT

[#1]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Naked_Communist

^^^ coming in at #40 is:

Discredit the family as an institution. Encourage promiscuity, masturbation and easy divorce.

You should read all 45 of that books "points".

Posted: 11/28/2012 8:55:29 PM EDT

[#2]

Quoted:

Quoted:

Marriage is just a way for her to get half of what you have ! And those bitches are crazy.

Last 3 to be exact. I'll NEVER get married again.

Best advice to a man that is thinking of getting married is : Don't...

The only constant in all your failed relationships is you, I hate to tell you.

Best advice to man who keeps choosing the same nutjob over and over: Learn how to choose wisely.

Everyone has their flaws. That goes for guys and girls. You can't tell one person to choose wisely because it way more involved than that. You are making that person be responsible for determine how they themselves will act, how their partner will act, their own flaws, their partners flaws, how they will react to their partners flaws, and how the partner will react to their own flaws, and then reactions to those reactions. Some of that doesn't even surface until way down the road or some major type of events happen. I don't know anyone that can predict the future, especially predicting the behavior of someone else. One can only make a decision based on the information they have at the time. So not ignoring warning signs is possible, knowing the future enough to choose wisely is not. It's more a luck of the draw if you ask me.

No way. You feel the person out for as long as it takes. If there is any doubt in your mind you DON'T do it.

Posted: 11/28/2012 8:58:27 PM EDT

[#3]

Personas... Man.... It all comes down to personas and how a person "fronts" themselves to another.

How well do ever really know somebody?

Posted: 11/28/2012 9:03:14 PM EDT

[#4]

Quoted:

Quoted:

Marriage is just a way for her to get half of what you have ! And those bitches are crazy.

Last 3 to be exact. I'll NEVER get married again.

Best advice to a man that is thinking of getting married is : Don't...

The only constant in all your failed relationships is you, I hate to tell you.

Best advice to man who keeps choosing the same nutjob over and over: Learn how to choose wisely.

Everyone has their flaws. That goes for guys and girls. You can't tell one person to choose wisely because it way more involved than that. You are making that person be responsible for determine how they themselves will act, how their partner will act, their own flaws, their partners flaws, how they will react to their partners flaws, and how the partner will react to their own flaws, and then reactions to those reactions. Some of that doesn't even surface until way down the road or some major type of events happen. I don't know anyone that can predict the future, especially predicting the behavior of someone else. One can only make a decision based on the information they have at the time. So not ignoring warning signs is possible, knowing the future enough to choose wisely is not. It's more a luck of the draw if you ask me.

No way. You feel the person out for as long as it takes. If there is any doubt in your mind you DON'T do it.

Still doesn't mean anything. How are you going to predict someone developing an addiction issue down the road? How are you going to predict someone developing bi-polar disorder after 15 years of marriage and then try killing themselves? How are you going to predict the behavior of you and your spouse when a decision your spouse made caused the death of one of your children? How about something less extreme. What if you get injured and can no longer work? How are you going to predict her reaction to providing you care and the loss of income? There are a million unexpected scenarios that can derail plans. You will not know how someone will handle it until it happens. That's why I say it is more luck than anything.

Posted: 11/28/2012 9:03:33 PM EDT

[#5]

Quoted:
So I've been pondering this for a while now...why do people even get married anymore?

It seems like its nearly impossible to find someone who's trustworthy, loyal and unselfishness now-a-days....

What does the hive say?

Sounds like you're looking for a Lab...

Posted: 11/28/2012 9:10:35 PM EDT

[#6]

A truly committed relationship should have plenty of incentives to keep going...even when it gets hard.

We decided to get married because it was the natural choice. I would not have remained in a relationship with a man for a long period of time unless I was married to him. If you want a true commitment, put it down on paper, in front of legal authorities (and in my case, in front of my Creator). You don't keep your foot halfway out of the relationship and expect a relationship to last. You can't expect a reward when you risk nothing.

Another thing. Marry your equal. Be the kind of person that the mate you desire is seeking.

Be all in....or don't bother with any of it and rent your way through life. Always risking nothing and receiving nothing.

Posted: 11/28/2012 9:48:43 PM EDT

[#7]

Quoted:
A truly committed relationship should have plenty of incentives to keep going...even when it gets hard.

We decided to get married because it was the natural choice. I would not have remained in a relationship with a man for a long period of time unless I was married to him. If you want a true commitment, put it down on paper, in front of legal authorities (and in my case, in front of my Creator). You don't keep your foot halfway out of the relationship and expect a relationship to last. You can't expect a reward when you risk nothing.

Another thing. Marry your equal. Be the kind of person that the mate you desire is seeking.

Be all in....or don't bother with any of it and rent your way through life. Always risking nothing and receiving nothing.

A woman weighs in. Nice. Or a gay marriage catcher, not that there is anything wrong with that. I don't necessarily agree with the marry your equal part, but I do agree with the gambling analogy. You must go all in on the relationship. Marry a hard headed woman. Buy her shoes when you can't afford them. Make as many babies as she can produce, even when you can't afford them. Buy her more shoes.

It's a struggle. It's passionate. It's boring. It's work. It's passionate. It's boring. It's a struggle. You get tired of hearing her bitch. She gets tired of not hearing you bitch. Recycle. We'll have the discussion about separate bank accounts later.

Posted: 11/28/2012 9:50:17 PM EDT

[#8]

Quoted:
Many here will agree. For those with no religious affiliation, marriage was once still an important civil contract. It ensured that women and children, who back in the day were very vulnerable without someone to provide for them, were cared for. Marriage is increasingly incompatible with today's values. For two people with little to no religious affiliation, who can both provide for themselves, who only want to stay together as long as it is enjoyable, and who have little to no interest in raising children, or at least raising children in the setting of a nuclear family, marriage makes little sense, and indeed seems like more trouble than it's worth.

Me, I'm a weird religious fanatic and believe that a marriage is something that cannot be dissolved, even if the two people seperate.

How's that workin' out for ya?

Posted: 11/28/2012 9:54:29 PM EDT

[#9]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Because good women demand marriage.

Sorry, but no. Good women require commitment, the same as good men. If two people want to spend their lives together, paper doesn't seem to mean much.

I'll never understand why this is so hard for people to grasp.

Marriage punishes people who decide they are no longer compatible. Why enter into that? Especially when the marriage can literally be ended on the merest whim of a partner--something you LITERALLY have no control over.

Commitment trumps marriage.

Posted: 11/28/2012 9:56:10 PM EDT

[#10]

Quoted:
A truly committed relationship should have plenty of incentives to keep going...even when it gets hard.

We decided to get married because it was the natural choice. I would not have remained in a relationship with a man for a long period of time unless I was married to him. If you want a true commitment, put it down on paper, in front of legal authorities (and in my case, in front of my Creator). You don't keep your foot halfway out of the relationship and expect a relationship to last. You can't expect a reward when you risk nothing.

Another thing. Marry your equal. Be the kind of person that the mate you desire is seeking.

Be all in....or don't bother with any of it and rent your way through life. Always risking nothing and receiving nothing.

Dafuq?

Why do I need the .gov, "the legal authorities" , to sign off on your marriage?

Posted: 11/28/2012 10:00:28 PM EDT

[#11]

Quoted:
Because good women demand marriage.

demand... demanding something that the other does not want is never a good thing.
a good woman will find a like minded man to marry.

Posted: 11/28/2012 10:01:03 PM EDT

[#12]

Quoted:
I don't need to hold a gun to your head (alimony, half your shit, "child support", jail for lack of payment of "child support") to feel bonded to you for life. If I can't take you at your word, we don't need to be together.

eta: and XCR feels the same way.

Posted: 11/28/2012 10:03:03 PM EDT

[#13]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Because good women demand marriage.

Sorry, but no. Good women require commitment, the same as good men. If two people want to spend their lives together, paper doesn't seem to mean much.

Commitments have terms, and the paper spells out those terms.

and yet all it takes is one of the two to destroy the terms of that contract....

Posted: 11/28/2012 10:10:57 PM EDT

[#14]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Because good women demand marriage.

Sorry, but no. Good women require commitment, the same as good men. If two people want to spend their lives together, paper doesn't seem to mean much.

Commitments have terms, and the paper spells out those terms.

LOL.

Posted: 11/28/2012 10:17:18 PM EDT

[#15]

I married the best woman god ever invented and she ended up being a cheating whore. (Married 14 years and one child). So I don't know what to tell ya but I don't plan on getting hitched anytime soon. I have dated some other decent women but, I ain't ready to give all my shit away again. If u bite the bullet get a prenup that's my best advise.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile

Posted: 11/28/2012 10:17:58 PM EDT

[#16]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Because good women demand marriage.

I don't need to hold a gun to your head (alimony, half your shit, "child support", jail for lack of payment of "child support") to feel bonded to you for life. If I can't take you at your word, we don't need to be together.

eta: and XCR feels the same way.

Reason is super sexy.

Posted: 11/28/2012 10:33:19 PM EDT

[#17]

Been married 21 years this year, together for 25. If something were to happen to him I don't think I'd get married again. And I'm female, if I was male I'd be even more against it since I know how bad you guys get screwed in the family court system.
Now being middle aged and having assets we've worked our whole lives for it's just not worth the risk, and men as trustworthy and compatible as hubby are pretty rare. A friend of mine's mom got remarried after getting divorced and it turns out he had a well hidden gambling problem and he cleaned her out. All her retirement savings - gone. And she was in her late 50s when this happened.

And I agree with others that a piece of paper does not a marriage make. Frankly I wish the legal system would stay out of it, but I understand that all the precedents for next-of-kin, inheritance etc that is built into it. But I don't need paper to make a commitment that I will keep.

As far as finding a good one, take a look at their parents, their family, etc as well as their own behavior and how they treat people other than you. All that has significant clues as to who they really are. You're less likely to get a materialistic gold-digger girl from, say, an Amish family LOL. Yeah, that's extreme but you know what I mean. And if they're generous and fair to others in their social and business dealings (voluntarily, not forced) they're more likely to be that way with you too.

Don't get blinded by the hotness. I see so much focus on that here (except for the "pointy elbows" crowd LOL), then a lot of complaining when that hot girl turns out to be a bitch. You've got to look past the packaging, that shiny present with the nice bow and wrapping paper may be a gift-wrapped dog turd.

Posted: 11/28/2012 10:57:42 PM EDT

[#18]

True love is hard to find, sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend.

Posted: 11/28/2012 10:58:16 PM EDT

[#19]

Quoted:
I married the best woman god ever invented and she ended up being a cheating whore. (Married 14 years and one child). So I don't know what to tell ya but I don't plan on getting hitched anytime soon. I have dated some other decent women but, I ain't ready to give all my shit away again. If u bite the bullet get a prenup that's my best advise.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile

Your story is all too common. There is NO reason for a man to get married unless he is doing it for his kids.

Posted: 11/28/2012 10:58:45 PM EDT

[#20]

Quoted:
True love is hard to find, sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend.

Happens to me all the time.

Posted: 11/28/2012 11:50:51 PM EDT

[#21]

Quoted:
So I've been pondering this for a while now...why do people even get married anymore?

It seems like with the divorce rate being where it is (mainly as a result of individuals selfishness, IMO), and how screwed men usually get in divorces (losing house, truck, paying child support, etc...), that no one would be excited about getting married and risking loosing everything to a greedy cheating spouse. It seems like its nearly impossible to find someone who's trustworthy, loyal and unselfishness now-a-days...it almost makes me want to give up on the idea of marriage/relationships and plan on having a few "fuck buddies" or "friends with benefits" for the foreseeable future. This saddens me, but I wonder if its just the reality of the situation.

What does the hive say?

I say look for good women in good places!

(I have been married for almost 7 years and found my wife in college...

)

Posted: 11/29/2012 12:01:48 AM EDT

[#22]

I've been with the same woman for years (not married yet), but...

It seems lots of the people I grew up with are getting divorced like crazy lately.

Almost all my friends that got married are now divorced. Seriously, I think about 80%. I'm also noticing people who were even pretty
religious (Catholic & Jewish) are also getting divorced, despite their faith.

I don't get it. What the hell happened?

I'll tell you this- I certainly think one of the problems is that people jump into marriage too easily. People should be engaged at least
a year before getting married. This bullshit of meeting someone and then getting married a few weeks, or few months later is insane.
And yeah, don't tell me about how you married your wife after knowing her for 20 minutes. A few exceptions don't mean shit.

One thing is for sure, almost all the guys I know got fucked in their divorce. At least the guys who actually had anything. Marriage
and divorce definitely favors women.

So, guys- DO NOT marry some chick you barely know, and make sure you have a good pre-nup.

Posted: 11/29/2012 12:11:47 AM EDT

[#23]

The Misandry Bubble Read it.

Posted: 11/29/2012 12:19:37 AM EDT

[#24]

Quoted:
The Misandry Bubble Read it.

Haven't finished it yet, but so far, so good.

Read it- very interesting so far.

Good find, Quigley!

Posted: 11/29/2012 12:47:30 AM EDT

[#25]

Quoted:
Because good women demand marriage.

Haha No.

Posted: 11/29/2012 1:22:55 AM EDT

[#26]

Even if you don't get married, if you live together for x number of years, something called common-law marriage or something kicks in in many states, so you would probably still have the messy divorce issues if things don't work out.

Posted: 11/29/2012 1:26:45 AM EDT

[#27]

I love my wife, even if sometimes it's hard. You'll figure it out.

Posted: 11/29/2012 1:57:52 AM EDT

[#28]

Back in the old days, being a single mom was almost an impossible lifestyle. People got married because it was how we survived. This goes back to the hunter gatherer days, when women were constantly pregnant or rearing children, and therefore in need of protection; pairing up was a necessity.

Abortion and contraception now allows women to avoid the vulnerabilities and requirements of pregancies.

The Welfare State provides for single moms; there's no need for marriage.

Other Leftist initiatives have worked towards deconstructing the meaning of the institution of marriage.

At this rate, the OP will be proven correct.

It is the plan.

Posted: 11/29/2012 2:19:21 AM EDT

[#29]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Because good women demand marriage.

I don't need to hold a gun to your head (alimony, half your shit, "child support", jail for lack of payment of "child support") to feel bonded to you for life. If I can't take you at your word, we don't need to be together.

eta: and XCR feels the same way.

So do I.

I'm married because my husband wanted a married "us". If he'd wanted a single "us", I'd be single. Marriage really is a non-issue for me.

Posted: 11/29/2012 2:21:06 AM EDT

[#30]

Quoted:
Because good women demand marriage.

So do the bad.

Posted: 11/29/2012 2:28:30 AM EDT

[#31]

Quoted:
Don't fish in a catfish pond and expect to catch a trout.

What in the hell is that supposed to mean? Never heard that one before.

Posted: 11/29/2012 2:34:54 AM EDT

[#32]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Don't fish in a catfish pond and expect to catch a trout.

What in the hell is that supposed to mean? Never heard that one before.

I THINK he means don't go looking for Mrs.Right in bar or strip club!

But as for myself, I PREFER catfish over trout: for both catching AND eating!

(That said, my folks are still married, and have been since Dad came home from WWII, and me and my 5 brothers and sisters are all still married to original spouses.)

Choose wisely.

Posted: 11/29/2012 2:39:38 AM EDT

[#33]

Quoted:
Because good women demand marriage.

So do the bad ones, but for entirely different reasons.

Posted: 11/29/2012 2:42:51 AM EDT

[#34]

Quoted:
I dated my wife for 11 years. We did not live together.

One of the things that convinced me to get married is that I know a man in his 50's that has never been married. He has the money and time to buy and do just about anything he wants, but you can tell something is missing. At my age now, 34, I honestly think it'd be great to be single. I like being married just fine, but think I'd be just as happy right now a single guy. However, when you get in your 50's and beyond, you just become the creepy old guy when you try to socialize.

He and I were having a conversation one day about health. He made the statement that he has told his friends that if anything serious were to ever happen to him health wise, to get him to Nashville, that he didn't trust the medical care in our area. This man has to rely on friends for things that most have family to rely on. I don't think that's how I want to end up. Marriage is about the only way to prevent that. Especially for someone like myself who is an only child.

My boss is similar to that. Lots of money, he paid for kids college, cars etc since he was working all the time and didn't see them, he figured it as a replacement. They just use him for money and never visit him. The money has stopped, but they are all full grown now. He just bitching about his son especially who seems to show up everytime after the work is done. He terribly regrets decisions he made, and has warned me several times not to be away from your family. To me I need enough money to do what I want. Outside of that it is just numbers on paper.

Posted: 11/29/2012 2:45:23 AM EDT

[#35]

Quoted:
I wish I could find someone worth marrying. As it is I have trouble finding amyself woman to just simply go out on a date with.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile

From what I recall about your previous posts you are pretty particular. That is good and all, but for every filter you place on what you want it really restricts the dating pool. I was like that for a while and then I just picked a couple things I had to have, and the rest was ancillary.

Posted: 11/29/2012 3:02:22 AM EDT

[#36]

I have no idea how to embed, but http://youtu.be/DnfclkdRa-A

Posted: 11/29/2012 3:10:34 AM EDT

[#37]

I'll bet you half my stuff that you'll love me forever.

Posted: 11/29/2012 3:12:15 AM EDT

[#38]

My advice after being married for 18 years is....

wait until youre secure in a job field you like
make a good income to take care of a family with some money put aside
date many women to see which type you like
pick a low maintainance girl with good attitude....most important thing about a girl or any person is their attitude
when you find the right girl date her for at lease a year if not 2 as you cant get to know someone well enoughin a few months
make sure she doesnt have an bad genetic flaws... ie. hemophilia carrier...look at her family medical history.
Family money would help too

Again a good attitude is key here.

Posted: 11/29/2012 3:24:22 AM EDT

[#39]

True love
Unrealistic expectations of the partner
No one foresees failure

Quoted:

Best advice to man who keeps choosing the same nutjob over and over: Learn how to choose wisely.

Sometimes you can't tell.

Posted: 11/29/2012 3:32:21 AM EDT

[#40]

Quoted:
The Misandry Bubble Read it.

Yes, that's why men shouldn't marry.

Or at the very least, they shouldn't marry women who were raised in this culture.

Posted: 11/29/2012 3:59:09 AM EDT

[#41]

Quoted:

Quoted:
The Misandry Bubble Read it.

Yes, that's why men shouldn't marry.

Or at the very least, they shouldn't marry women who were raised in this culture.

Yep. If I had much better financial means, and could have a wife that didn't work... I'd SO fucking go to Eastern Europe and import me a hottie.

Posted: 11/29/2012 4:17:35 AM EDT

[#42]

Quoted:
True love
Unrealistic expectations of the partner
No one foresees failure

Quoted:

Best advice to man who keeps choosing the same nutjob over and over: Learn how to choose wisely.

Sometimes you can't tell.

Very true. Mine put on a good act for the first three years or so before the switch flipped. A situation with work required me to take a stint working out of state. I'd always say I had a happy marriage until I came back home from those few months away. The person I came back to looked like my wife but acted like a different person. Relatively sure she was fucking around while I was gone. No proof other than a strong feeling but if I were to bet money on it I would double down. Whole marriage pretty much went to hell after that.

I was ready to split and planning to do so four years in but then child number two came along so I stayed. A few years ago she cheated again only this time I know that for certain. I filed for divorce and moved out for a while. She begged and pleaded to work things out and the thought of her dragging god knows what back home around my daughters honestly horrified me so back I went. I knew full well she would shack up with the first guy who would have her since she is incapable of taking care of herself. So here I am for the next nine years.

I count the days.

Posted: 11/29/2012 4:25:05 AM EDT

[#43]

I just got married in October 2012. My wife and I were together for five years before that and lived together for about four. We both have our flaws, we both fight (rarely), but one thing we learned is to talk to each other. We never hold grudges.

And she looks good shooting my gun

Posted: 11/29/2012 4:31:04 AM EDT

[#44]

Quoted:

Quoted:
The Misandry Bubble Read it.

Yes, that's why men shouldn't marry.

Or at the very least, they shouldn't marry women who were raised in this culture.

Yep. If I had much better financial means, and could have a wife that didn't work... I'd SO fucking go to Eastern Europe and import me a hottie.

Careful, there's nice women and not so nice women there too. I'd be cautious about basing a relationship on an economic and social disparity. There's no easy solutions.

My best advice is to learn to communicate with people and to speak woman. Seduce a really good woman and keep her wrapped around your finger as your love slave. Pick a grateful one to start out and keep her grateful. The same stuff that attracts single women makes married women's hearts flutter.

Also, find one who naturally wants to give you the things you want. If I love a man, I naturally want to give him sex and food and clean clothes. I'm wired that way, you don't have to explain why you want these things. Imagine the conflict if I just wanted to buy presents for a man, or look pretty for him? Find one who matches up. One who wants the things you give naturally too.

Posted: 11/29/2012 4:32:38 AM EDT

[#45]

Quoted:

Quoted:
The Misandry Bubble Read it.

Yes, that's why men shouldn't marry.

Or at the very least, they shouldn't marry women who were raised in this culture.

Yep. If I had much better financial means, and could have a wife that didn't work... I'd SO fucking go to Eastern Europe and import me a hottie.

Odds are she would marry you long enough to get a green card then divorce you for half your stuff and alimony. Foreign bride shopping seldom works out well for the end user.

Posted: 11/29/2012 4:33:39 AM EDT

[#46]

If you are going to get married:
1)Be sure YOU are ready for it. If you cannot be selfless(note: selfless and door mat are NOT the same thing) and have the mindset that you want the marriage to win..don't bother. Also be ready for hard work and the tough moments because they are both going to be required along the way.
2)Choose wisely. Yes, people change and even if you choose a quality mate, things can go south. If you choose wisely from the start, the chances of that happening are much, much lower.

If you can't do both of those, you might not want to do so.

Marriage is not for everyone either. I am not interested in children at all(vasectomy already done..not interested one bit), so marriage is not something I am in a hurry to do. I can be plenty happy with a long term committed relationship that does not involve me giving up half my stuff(espc. getting near 40..too much money saved for retirement, etc.). There is no "one size fits all", despite what people here will tell you on many topics.

Posted: 11/29/2012 4:38:21 AM EDT

[#47]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Because good women demand marriage.

Sorry, but no. Good women require commitment, the same as good men. If two people want to spend their lives together, paper doesn't seem to mean much.

Commitments have terms, and the paper spells out those terms.

And when those terms can be cast aside by a good lawyer, they dont mean shit.

Commitment can be honored without paperwork.

I have a commitment to my mother and father, my brothers....would do anything for them.

Theres no terms between us.

Posted: 11/29/2012 4:39:41 AM EDT

[#48]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Because good women demand marriage.

I don't need to hold a gun to your head (alimony, half your shit, "child support", jail for lack of payment of "child support") to feel bonded to you for life. If I can't take you at your word, we don't need to be together.

eta: and XCR feels the same way.

So do I.

I'm married because my husband wanted a married "us". If he'd wanted a single "us", I'd be single. Marriage really is a non-issue for me.

If my life partner wanted paper, I wouldn't deny him either. There's advantages with insurance, retirement, rights only legal spouses have. Marriage does have advantages.

Posted: 11/29/2012 4:40:09 AM EDT

[#49]

When you want an honest, lifelong bond with another person and you find the RIGHT ONE, then your possessions don't mean shit

Posted: 11/29/2012 4:40:11 AM EDT

[#50]

You honestly think because you're not married, shacking up and producing a brood that once you get bored or find something better and desert her that you will escape the responsibilities of being a parent? That is the best excuse you can come up with for not getting married? Dude, do the planet a favor and stay out of the gene pool. What's the real reason you can't make a commitment. Looking for a get out of jail free card?

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Why do people even get married anymore? (Page 2 of 5)

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