I know this isn't gun related, but I am hoping someone out there can help me.

Recently my wife began taking Paxil.  She had anxiety and the Doc prescribed it for her.  Anyway, the stuff really worked great for that but it also had another effect.  BTW - She is 27 and I am 34 - we have two children 2yrs and 5 yrs.

Her personality has changed.  She was once a bit introverted, and cautious. Now she is outgoing and willing to give anything a try.  She doesn't seem to really care as much whether I am around or not.  She is not so interested in sex as before.  She is confident and vivacious.  She used to talk disparagingly about tatoos and tonight she calls me from the beach where she is with her girlfriends and says she got one on her back below her beltline.  That isn't my wife!

I should be really happy for her - she seems so much happier, but what I really want is my old wife back.  I miss her greatly.  This new one kind of scares me and I am really worried about it.  I feel like I am losing my best friend and another woman has taken her over.  Has anyone ever experienced anything like this?

Go to the doctor with her on the next visit and discuss these issues with the doctor...just guessing but maybe a lower dosage or something ?? Tell her how your feeling. Good luck and take care.

Perhaps she is just entering a different stage of her life.  We all change as we "mature".

You married her at an early developmental stage of her life, and now she has the Paxil-induced courage to move to the next stage.

I'm no doctor, but I changed dramatically between age 20 and 30.  The relationship that I was in at the time was stressed, but ultimately survived due the patience of my girlfriend.  Under any other circumstances it would not have survived MY evolution.

All the best to you.

I should start by saying that I'm not a shrink or anything, so this advice is worth exactly what you paid for it.  If you are really worried then you should consider talking to her, or atleast a, doctor about the changes.

The effects on her in relation to being more confident and more outgoing but not being interested in sex are usual for Paxil.  If that didn't happen then there'd be something wrong.  It's kind of ironic that Paxil is used to treat people who are afraid to get out and meet the opposite sex, but lose the interest to do anything once they meet them.

As to the tatoo, it sounds to me like she's always wanted one.  The whole thing about talking bad about people who have them was probably more of a "I'm to chicken to get one, and if I can't have one then nobody else should either" kind of thing.  

What you need to do is sit down and talk with her.  This is going to sound really touchy-feely, but you're dealing with a woman here so you'll have to sink to her level for a bit.  [;)]  Tell her that you are glad that she feels more comfortable getting out and doing new things but that you feel like you're being left out and you want to share the 'new her' with her.  The important thing is, if she's been repressing for all these years and is now breaking free, then you need to make sure she doesn't percieve you or the kids as trying to hold her down or push her back to her old self.  Let her have a second childhood for a little, she'll get over it soon enough and then things will settle down.

Good luck.
My wife is on Amitrypiline for Fibromyalgia.
It has lessened her mood swings and helped our sex life accidentally, but it is scary to see how many changes meds can do. Luckily ours have been for the better.
You might also check into another substitue medication.

My ex wife had a similar experience.  She started taking paxil and went from being fairly outgoing to being extremely introverted.  She also gained a lot of weight in less than a year, which really screwed up her self esteem.  Severe weight gain and no interest in sex are common side effects of paxil.  You should sit down and talk with the doctor about your concerns.  The doctor should be able to address how long the medication is needed, how to deal with the side effects, and what you need to learn to adjust to.  There may be some things that she wasn't willing to do before and finds enjoyable now.  It's not going to help either of you to tell her you don't want her to do what makes her happy.

Try talking to your wife about your concerns, and if necessary see if you can find a marriage counselor that is covered by your insurance.  It might do both of you well to have a disinterested third party to help resolve the problems.  Doesn't always work, but it can't hurt to try if all else fails.

Just my $0.02:

Meds suck. If you can possibly help it, do not take them.  I know they're a blessing for some people, but they also screw up a lot of other people. It seems every time you turn around there is another shyster pushing pills on people for the silliest things.  I don't mean to belittle your wife's anxiety problem or anyone else's on this board.  But it seems to me a lot of problems are better handled through other, less drastic means..

Good luck to you.    

Well,

I just went on Paxil (20mg) a little while ago for a specific social phobia I have. It's been my understanding from talks with the Doc and head shrinker that it should take 4-6 weeks for it to start to have an effect. So if these changes happened as soon as she started taking the drug I would talk to the doctor. Most of my side affects went away after a week.

If I where you I would have a talk with her and let her know how you feel. I would also with her on the next doctors visit ant explain your concerns to him.

She should also be seeing a shink on a regular basis. If not she is being mis-treated.

I believe Paxil is not a cure. It is being taken to assist a person while a more permanent solution is worked on (head shrinking and self help).

On the plus side. I kind of like walking around and not thinking about skrewing every 10 seconds. [:)]

Good Luck!

Oh yeah. If she stays on the Paxil, warn her not to miss a dose.

I had some really wicked dreams that night! [:o)] [%|] [:\] [(:|)]

I WORK WITH PEOPLE IN A THERAPUETIC SETTING THAT ARE ON VARIOUS ANTI-DEPRESSANTS/ MOOD ELEVATORS.  PAXIL IS NOT THE CURE FOR EVERYONE. THERE ARE SEVERAL OTHER MEDS OUT THERE. CELEXA IS FAST ACTING (7-10 DAYS) ANS IS CONSIDERABLY MILDER THAN PAXIL YOU MIGHT WANT TO DO A LITTLE RESEARCH ON YOUR OWN THEN TALK WITH YOUR WIFE AND HER DOCTOR. SHE CAN ALWAYS GO BACK TO THE PAXIL IF OTHER MEDS DO NOT HELP.

GOOD LUCK,
SOUP

Introversion; weight gain; low to no interest in sex?  Keep that stuff AWAY from my wife!  REPEAT!  Back away from the house with your hands on TOP of your head...!

there's a first-hand writeup of the effects someone went through when they started using Paxil at

[url]http://slate.msn.com/features/paxil/paxil.asp[/url]

This guy got what he deserved.
A. - His anxiety wasn't interfearing with his life. The Doc shouldn't have perscribed it.
B. - If he had taken some time to educate himself he would have known not to drink while on Paxil.
C. - He was only intrested in popping pills. If he wanted his anxiety cured he would have gone to the head shrinker.
[%|]

I've been in therapy for three decades plus for dysthemia -- low end, chronic depression. It took my doctor and I six months to find a medication regimen that didn't make me drowsy or irritable. We settled on Bupropion (Wellbutrin) 50 mg 2x daily and Zoloft 50 mg daily.

Then it took about a year to really kick in. A year and some ongoing talk therapy. In the meantime, I've undergone some corrective procedures for a heart rhythm problem, stopped substance abuse, improved my diet, increased social and recreational activities, done a lot of reading about what's going on in my head and my life.

A pill won't fix things. A pill may help you fix things, but the fix is up to you.

Some quack put my wife on that stuff, I flushed it! Wife thanked me for it. It turned her into an alien. She was fie till the med, then she didn't want to do ANYTHING. Would lay out of work, be in the same place when I got home from work as when I left.I had to beg her to eat any little something. But she would take that crap on time, every time. I finally got fed up and flushed it. When she had to go back to him for a few stitches(working in garage) he told her how good she seemed on the Paxil. I told him I flushed that sh*t 2 months ago! He was livid to say the least. I told him to sew her up and we wouldn't be back.

Her new doc is an older guy. Says new docs are too quick to medicate someone without thinking things through. I agree.

I feel for you guy. If she won't give up the happy pills, and she probably won't, first thing to do is transfer all bank accounts, assets into your name. Cancel her credit cards. Consult a divorce attorney for advice. Take all your guns to a friend who you really trust, and batten down the hatches. Stormy weather ahead my friend.

Best piece of advice yet. Especially the "get your guns outta there" part.

Uummmmmm, gee, this thread reads like a list of people who may have fibbed a little on their yellow forms. I'd be careful about what I say on this thread.

Oh yeah, definatly dump her now while she's down!   Sheesh!  [V]

There is a big problem with attempting to stop taking drugs like Paxil.  Do not encourage cold turkey approach.  These are the kinds of drugs that a lot of these school killers were on.  Read up by doing a search on [url]www.google.com[/url] inserting paxil reactions or some phrase for reference.

I hope you find some way to get her off and find a more natural solution.

The 4473 asked if you've ever been "adjudicated mentally defective", not if you've ever been treated for illness.  "Adjudicated mentally defective" means actually being put in front of a judge in a courtroom and being ruled insane.  And besides, having knowldge of this stuff doesn't mean having _first hand_ knowledge of it.  These days there are doctors who'll hand this shit out like it's candy.  I was talking to a friend about this stuff the other day and he said that his past several girl friends were all on Prozac/Paxil/Zoloft/etc.

My wife suffered through depression for several years and has taken both Paxil and Prozac.  They put her on Prozac first but she really hated the stuff and how it made her feel.  She doesn't even like to feel drunk so you can imagine how much she hated feeling drugged all day.  The doctor changed the 'scrip to Paxil and that worked better but she still didn't like it.  She took Paxil for the first few months that she was going to therapy but stopped as soon as she felt she could get by without it.  After about a year of therapy she was straigtened out and things have been pretty good ever since.

Make no mistake about it these drugs are personality modifiers.  The do change people into someone you may not care to be with anymore or them into someone who does not want to be with you anymore.  While I don't have problems with short term use to overcome tramatic events I really don't believe in them long term.  You married someone at least in part for their personality when they decide to change it on you what do you do? You can wake up to a different person.

Jeeeeeezzzz!  No wonder the world is screwed up! Check out the number of repies who is or had someone on these pills.  If this is representative of the rest of this screwed up nation, it is a sad situation. It is just another form of mind control from one state to another.

 It's amazing that the human race has been able to survive this long without these drugs.

My doc put me on Bupropion 5 years ago. I've been a stammerer since elementary school and he felt it might be the result of social anxiety and the like. I took it for 3 weeks, but stopped because it made me so drowsy I didn't feel safe driving. I didn't notice an effect on my speech problem, but 3 weeks was probably not enough time to tell either way. I wish there was a cure to this plague in my life, but I don't feel comfortable in treating it with medication. I can't tell you how it's affected my life – suffice it to say it's been a nightmare.

Loss of sex drive.....weight gain....introversion.....kinda sounds like marrige to me...

The line between legal and illegal drugs is simply code law.  Both can be addictive, mind altering (good and bad), and both, if misused, can kill.  Too often people have an opinion that "The doctor prescribed it, so it must be good."   Remember that you are in charge.  

I have always found it interesting that some of the most aggressive users and/or supporters of this type of drug, are the same people that get on a high horse about "illegal" drugs.  

Soccer Mom: I love you lil' Jonny, so don't drink alchohol, or smoke pot!  They mess with your brain.

lil' Jonny: Ok, I won't(wink, wink)!  What's this?

Soccer Mom: Your Ritalin!  Let's do it together.  Mommy will take her Prozac at the same time.  

CassidyGT:

Hang in there dude.  Maybe I can help ya a bit.

I have two ecperiences with Paxil.

The first was with my ex-wife.  The second is with me as I have been taking it now for almost a year.  I can also offer you a medical perspective as my wife is a Clinical Paharacist

Paxil, in case you don't know is called an SSRI.  This stands for Selective Serotonin Re-uptake Inhibitor.

In short, ones body naturally produces a chemical called Serotonin.  It is the natural defense to assure a basic equilibrium within the mind and body.  It maintains a feeling of mental well being if you will.

In some people, their Serotonin is taken up (absorbed if you will) back into their system too fast and they have the resulting depression, anxiety, nervousness etc etc.

Paxil is designed to slow the re-absorbption of Seratonin and allow for a more normal way of dealing with the pressures exerted on ones mind.

It has many side-effects but they generally only last from anywhere between 4-8 weeks.  Those side-effects can be, nervousness, weight gain, increased/decreased appetite, sexual disfunction, blurred vision, body temperature variances (feelings of cold or of hot) and sleeplessness.  Some folks have very little and some, like me, went through about every freakin' one with a vengance.

My ex-wife was a ding-ding to begin with. Always depressed/psychotic and the Paxil had what I think of as an adverse effect on her.  She did her fair share of changing.  Some things were okay but on some......I felt like I completely lost her.  I always attributed her strange behavior to the Paxil but my wife now tells me that Paxil in and of itself is not supposed to do that.  She tells me that my ex-wifes odd and unpredictable tendancies were only amplified by the Paxil.  So, at tleast according to us this can occur.  Not intended but is a spin off effect anyway.

The Paxil does some weird stuff to you and people seem to react in varying ways.  My ex got more up-beat........more "focused"....she said that fvcking word a billion fvckin times..........and she basically lost it.

NOw, as for myself it has worked wonders.  My problems were all stree related (family/job) and I was to the point of being sick from it all.  Heck, I should have been on this stuff since about the 7th grade as I have always been a real hoooot. Very high-strung and an ultra-extremist in everything I do.  Short tempered and volatile.  The Paxil has really helped but I dare not miss mroe than a days does.  Weird things happen if I slip up and forget a couple of days. I forgot to take mine yesterday and I feel really ancy right now.  Kinda like I drank waaaaay too much coffee and I need to take a break.

I started on the smallest dose (10mg) and then graduated to 20 mg a day.  I know people who take, and function with, 50 mg doses a day.

Is your wife taking any type of assistance drug with it?  Attavan, Valium, Lorazepam?  These are commonly given to help decrease any side effects.

Paxil can change peoples attitudes but it is not intended to "Totally Alter" a persons personality and inhibitions.  

I am not trying to upset you but it would be my opinion that both you and your wife talk about this and visit her doctor together.  There may be other drugs that are more suitable for her.  Zoloft, Prozac, Serafem (a prozac type drug given to women who need the little boost and/or help during difficult menstrual cycles).

Either way I understand completely what you a

I think I need to get on some kind of happy pills too because I am too shy around womenz. What convinced me is: people taking pills= getting sex, me not taking pills= getting none poontang at all.

hey i got just the pill for you it's called X. there $25 apiece but for you there's a special price of $35 a hit. and if you can't get a girl then it can atleast get you a boy[>:/]