I would brew with someone if I could, there are always local brew clubs you could go see.
Seeing what others do will save you money, because you can see what you would like. Everyone will go thorugh some changes.
1. bigger is better up front
2. don't have to spend a lot to get a lot. Blichman is great but you can buy a lot of grain with other stuff
3. the easier it is, the more you will enjoy it.
saying all that, the biggest pita is the mashing temp control IMO and having a
insulated tun is the most important thing you can have as a home brewer dealing with smaller quantities of liquid . Dicking with temperatures, recirculating/re-heating a tun is just a huge pain in the dick. I went down the road of recirculation but it just was too much work. gotta heat extra water, recirculate, watch temp change, etc. Also cleaning and sparging needs to be simple.
moving hot liquid=get a pump. I did the gravity thing once. There is not way I'm going to work around hot liquid above me. Also tall brew stands are a pita to move.
1 piece system will cost more in the long run, vs piecing together what will complement your brew style.
so get a big(cheap) hot liquor tank-see the concord vessels above, get a bigger (cheap) brew pot- I would get two of the concord 20-25 gallon pots. you could probably get buy with a smaller HLT and you wont use 20 gallons of water at a time, where a boil kettle could use that much.
pump/silicon hose, get the camlocks from ebay- they are worth it.
mash tun spend money here, I would build one with 2" closed cell styrofoam and a thick insulated top out of a stainless pot. I prefer a false bottom vs the DIY piping.
plate chiller- I wont brew without it.
big hop spider-utah biodiesel
get a stainless steel paint stirrer, you will never have dry mash
https://www.amazon.com/Jiffy-Mixer-Paint-Gallon-ES/dp/B00ILYJ9CW/ref=pd_sim_201_1?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=0WX40EC28BADC8A6NX9K&tag=vglnk-c102-20
here is what I have after toyed around with other stuff.
two burner set up for size, 1 pump for cost, insulated tun.
This was setup to do recirc if I needed it, but I built a insulated top for the tun, and have since never needed it. made it simpler