this i like!

ar-jedi

Man, these SMBC comics are the best.

Had a guy that use to be a font of them.

After he was laid off (no one wanted him on their project) I saw him at a new place a few years later

I refused to hire him.

This may or may not be my favorite SMBC of all time.

Better take him to the BURN unit

Not sure if those belong here, or in the equations thread.


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I've been reading a book about anti-gravity. It's a great book; I can't put it down.

How did the constipated mathematician solve his problem?



He worked it out with a pencil.

Not all are exactly "nerd" jokes, but most like minded people will find these funny.  



When chemists die, they barium.

Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.

How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.

PMS jokes aren't funny; period.

Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.

We're going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?

When you get a bladder infection urine trouble.

Broken pencils are pointless.

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool .

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.

All the toilets in New York 's police stations have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.

I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.

Velcro - what a rip off!

A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.

Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

On a scale of e to Pi, I give that a 3.

Did you hear that Einstein finally came up with a theory about space?

Har har

Found this on Students in Aerospace:



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What's the difference between a civil engineer and mechanical engineer?

A mechanical engineer builds weapons, a civil engineer builds targets.

Three engineers are talking about god. One says "god must be a mechanical engineer, look at all the levers!" Another says "No, he must be an electrical engineer, look at the nerves, just like wires." The last says "He must be a civil engineer, nobody else would run a waste management pipeline through a recreational zone."

A mathematician, physicist and engineer are all told to find the density of a fuzzy ball. The mathemetician finds the mass and divides by the volume he determined through difficult calculation. The physicist plunges the ball in water with a lever, and adds weight to the other end of the lever until it floated to find its density. The engineer looked up the density in his table of fuzzy balls.

There are 10 types of people in the world, those that understand binary, those that don't understand binary, and those that understand this joke.

One of these days I'll bring a non number system joke to the table.

ETA: Of course this isn't completely correct, but I still enjoy it.

That's a good one.

Damn those mathematicians and their integrals!

How do you know you've met an extrovert engineer?  He stares at *your* shoes.