When I woke this morning I layed in bed listening to the rumble of thunder and watching lightning light up the sky.  The house was quiet I was the only one awake.  I was laying there thinking how much my life has changed and all I've been through these last 3 years. It was today my birthday 3 years ago one month exactly after wes died that I had a small celebration.... not because it was my birthday but because through the help of some amazing people who I had never met but they knew my husband I was able to secure my home.  I didnt have to worry about losing my home....the  home my kids had known and the one that is filled with memories of there father.  Today as in the last 3 years I not only celebrate my birthday but the kind, thoughtful,  caring people who gave me the ability to provide a home for my kids so they didnt have to worry about where they were going to live.  This home that my husband gave his life so we could keep ours.   Thank you all for being there for me then and being here for me now.   My 3 beautiful happy children thank you as well.

Kids are starting school Wednesday and I think we are all ready for them to go back.  They are doing really good and if you didnt know what they've been through you wouldn't know.  They are happy well adjusted kids and loving there baby sister.

I'm glad you and the kids are doing well.  Thanks for your update!

I don't do this often for when I do I feel like its opening pandora box.  Today is an exception for it's been 4 years since Wes died.  Opening that box I get hit with waves of alot of different emotions some good some not so good.  I need this to keep me grounded for it's a reminder of all that was lost and all that was gained.  I am forever changed by the actions of one man.....a man who was family for he was my husband's father.   I  look at my beautiful kids who are sooo full of life because I chose to be a person to take the good in an undoubtedly horrific situation.   They've learned from there moms actions to be strong but that's it's ok if there is a moment that we stumble....we just get back up and move forward.  We talk alot in this house of the man Wes was and we even talk of his dad Jd.  Because of me the kids still don't know hate...they have learned instead of looking straight at something only to stop and take a side view for it is different angle and thing might have been missed otherwise.   We do not hate Jd for what he did we accept him for the man he is a narcissist psychopath.   You can not change someone like that but see him for him that is it.  The kids are now getting to the age of asking questions that are hard but need answered.   Only person who can honestly answer them in a way they can understand no matter how hard it is for them is me.  They are so understanding about everything so it makes talking about it so much easier.   Kids miss Wes sooo much and as a mom it breaks my heart that I am only able to comfort and that I can't fix the loss. I make sure they know there dad his strengths and his weakness.  They need to see him for the man he was.....a kind, caring, compassionate man who had a back problem and that he loved us sooo much he gave his life to protect us from his dad.   Wes may not be here in person but he sure is here in spirit for we hold him in our hearts and cherish what time we were able to have with him.

I have remarried and have another child.....a man the kids love and respect and a baby that is the glue we needed to put us back together.   We are all happy, thriving, and have moved to a good place in our lives and hearts.  We are truly blessed to have this happiness in our lives and we learned to not take anything for granted...you never know when things can change.

To the man that we love Wes we miss you as much today as we did the day you died....it's just a pain that is easier now than it was then.  We are blessed for everything you have given us...alive and even now for if it wasn't for you I wouldn't be happily married with a child who carrie's your name.

I'm glad you've recovered so well.  FW_wife is enroute to see me w/ the late Fatalwishes' boy (now my Sinister).  He is the happiest kid I know despite his many challenges.

Crazy as everything had been going lately with the shelter in place and school closed so the kids are doing online learning we are encroaching on a five year mark.   That's right it's been 5 years since Wes died and Jd is serving 20 years for it.   This also means that he has served a quarter of his sentence.   I got a call from the parole board and Jd has a hearing on may 20th.  I hope and pray that they do the right thing and keep Jd locked up.

Write them.

God bless you and your family.

Parole hearing went pretty well and I got what I needed for Jd without him even knowing it.  Unfortunately I wasn't able to look him in the face due to no people allowed at the hearing but was able to attend via phone.  I doubt the others listening in heard it but Jd's voice told me everything I needed to know.  After he got to speak I knew that even before the statements were made he would be denied.   So he gets another year of prison which at that time they will do what is called paper review. Some might not think that's right but look at it this way he is is 78 and in poor health.  I doubt he'll have much longer to live inside or out.   Well at least that's my optimistic side of everything.

Outstanding.  Every day he is in he is reminded of why he is there.

I've never really poked around in this forum, but I'm glad I did.   Wes was a great guy and one of my favorite people to shoot with.  Eldon came up and shot with us a couple of years ago and it was good to see him and to reminisce about Wes and the early days of our USPSA club.