A new convert in my men's group is feeling guilt due to inappropriate contact with a woman that wasn't his wife before he was born again.

He wants to tell his wife but knows it will destroy her.

Anyone have insight on what the Bible says about this?

What did OP do?

I'll take a crack at this, IMO when your friend converted God forgave him of all of his sins and no longer counts them against him. He is accountable only to God

Romans 14:10-12
10 So why do you condemn another believer? Why do you look down on another believer? Remember, we will all stand before the judgment seat of God. 11 For the Scriptures say,
“‘As surely as I live,’ says the Lord,
‘every knee will bend to me,
   and every tongue will declare allegiance to God.”
12 Yes, each of us will give a personal account to God.

I think the only good that would come from telling her would be to relieve his own guilt and shame, but at the same time it would be dumping it on her with a devastating effect,

therefore i believe he should keep his mouth shut and rest on the promise's of God that

1 John 1:9
9 But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.

If he insists on telling someone tell him to go to his pastor/priest/elder or to trusted MATURE men in his church and follow James advice

James 5:16
16 Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.

I may be way off hopefully its gives food for thought

good luck

one last thing, Jesus addressing the woman caught in adultery John 8:10-11

10 Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?”

11 “No, Lord,” she said.

And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.”

Thanks Vector! 

I appreciate the input and the scripture!

Very good reply.
Sins are washed away by the Blood of Christ when you accept Him into your heart.

Jesus said to be as shrewd as serpents and as innocent as doves.  

My best advice is that your friend SHOULD NOT tell his wife at this time. It takes a extraordinary mature believer to work through infidelity these days and it sounds like your friend's wife is not that kind of woman. I'm in agreement with the poster above.

Nothing in scripture tells us to reveal the details of our sins to each other. The passage mentioned above "confess your sins one to another"......James 5:16 taken in the CONTEXT of the entire passage is best understood like this I think;

We are all sinners and in the admission of that to one another we begin the sanctification process (the healing process) that leads to a life of righteousness.

My prayer is that your friend comes to a place of repentance in his life where he can confess his sin and restore his relationship with Jesus first.  

The life of a new believer is a tough row to hoe.....lots of lessons and heartache to follow......worth every one of them.

Yep.  Nothing good will come from admitting the infidelity at this point.  Let the sacrifice of Jesus take care of the issue.  CombatVector nailed it -- go and sin no more.  +1000

What happens though if she asks if he has always been faithful?  He would have to sin to keep it hidden.

I'll probably just pray with him to find peace on the matter and let someone more mature in the faith counsel him.

Unfortunately repentance and forgiveness doesn't eliminate the consequences of our sin all the time, if i was asked point blank i would have to admit it to her and hope that she has recognized the change in me and be willing to forgive me.

If you want maybe try to find a good Christian counseling service locally and have your friend seek them out for guidance