Mostly i just need to complain. Feel free to advise. Figured this could be an example of what not to do for someone.

I bought a house for $95k at auction all-in 3 months ago and have been rehabbing it. My comps told me that in good condition it should sell for between 190-220k. It had old carpet, ugly wallpaper, needed new paint and a small amount of mold remediation. I've got about 20k in fixing it and we just finished everything that will cost money. Financially it is a great deal.

So now lets get to the tenant situation that is making my life a living hell:

My wife and I have worked on this house every day after work and every weekend for 3 months. 2 months in, My mothers boyfriend (in his 60s) says he is retireing and looking for a place to live locally, wonders if he can move into our house till he finds a place to live. We say sure and offer him reduced rent to live in the construction zone. About 2 weeks before he moves in we are in a panic trying to rush everything to completion, my mother decides that we are not making the place nice enough for her boyfriend (even though he has agreed to deal with the construction) and starts showing up letting herself in and starts replacing light fixtures, moving my tools around, ripping out things i'ld just completed etc because they weren't pretty enough. I would say all in all she has been net helpful, but she has decided she is in charge and it has caused about 2 fights per day for the last 2 weeks. I dont put up with it when I'm there and call her on her shit everyday but today she got in my wifes face while I am working out of town. At this point I'm ready to not speak to my mother again and ready to tell the tenant he has 6 months to find a new place (even though he is the worlds perfect tenant if it wasn't for my batshit crazy mother.)

I've got to call my mother tonight and I dont even know where to start in correcting this situation...

I am so mad I am basically getting no work done in the office today.

Wimp.

Business & family do not mix.

Man up and tell your mother to fuck off.


Never rent to family, friends or acquaintances.

This; Mother Fucking THIS.  My Wife and I don't even share a BANK, let alone money.
Never, EVER deal with Family and Money in the same sentence again.

Tell yer Ma to back down.  Tell the dude renting to beat bricks.

call the cops

Everybody out, and change the locks.

renting to family has not ever worked out very well for me.

Family sux, esp when it comes to favors and money..

We have a month to month lease already in place. He just officially moved in yesterday. I can't kick him out today. The earliest i could kick him out would be realistically 60 days from now, but he doesn't deserve to be kicked out. Its my MOM's problem.  My mother is definitely getting a talking to tonight. I am going to start out calm and explain to her that she is about ten miles beyond healthy boundaries. If she wants to flip out and be a drama queen some more and makes it clear she cant be a grown up then I think my only choice is to give the tenant notice that he has to leave at the earliest reasonable date which i think is about 6 months considering he just moved in yesterday.

I knew there were going to be a few problems with my mom overstepping but shes really been a nightmare. She fancies herself an HGTV style decorator and I think she has decided this is an opportunity to impress this dude with her mad home decorating skills. I have rented to friends before and there have been challenges but nothing that reminding people to be professional in regards to the rental couldn't fix. Obviously that has not worked in this case.

Bring your mom to small claims court for destruction of property.


Seriously, that's what you have to tell her if she does one thing more. She needs to keep her hands off your property and probably should shut the hell up.  Give her a bill for the work you will have to redo.  Changing the property is usually in a lease as a git the F out do not pass go item.  The lease was broken already if you have that in there.


My mom is nutty as fruitcake and does passive aggressive crap (which I call her on, and my siblings do not) but there'd be no way in hell I'd accept her as GC and design queen on my property.   When my mom sold her house and downsized her furniture and possessions she was trying to give me certain things that I had to gently and clearly state that her design style and mine are not the same.   (I despise glass coffee tables and end tables, they remind me of the 80's)   I had to be pretty damn blunt to get her to stop pushing things at me that I already said no to.

WRONG

it's YOUR problem and you need to fix it

as someone so eloquently said up above "  Man up and tell your mother to fuck off. "

Tell Mom that for 210K, she can do whatever the hell she wants to do with it. If she refuses to buy, tell her she has no business telling you how to remodel your house.

His mom is his problem, hopefully he can nip it in the bud

If he is your mothers boyfriend, why doesn't he move in with her?

Edit: Not GD.  Never mind.

Having delt with basically the same thing with one of my relitives, I had to put my fot down.

She would 'fix' things to improve the house. I finally told her I would raise the rent weekly for every 'improvement' she made. She was basically damaging the house fixing things that were fine such as fixtures, door knobs and trying to adjust doors. I would have to repair what she fixed.

After her bill went up a grand in one month her fixing stopped.

This is now going in all my future leases just in case. Brilliant. It wont help in this case because the person making my life hell actually isn't the one paying money.

This

Family will fuck you first and hardest.

I guess we have been lucky. We have one of our rent houses rented to my brother and sister in law. They have been there since 2008. No problems and have always paid rent.

Talked to my mother today. I started the call off super calm and polite, I thanked her for the work she had done and asked her how the painters had gotten along. She made the mistake of barking an order to me on the phone a little bit which gave me the perfect intro into the STFU and GTFO conversation. After about 10 minutes of back and forth she was apologizing. Said she was going to call my wife and apologize.

So atleast for today we have a ceasefire.

It's that simple.

Restraining order.

That's a plus...

Sounds like if your mother wants a nice place for her BF to stay that is under her control, then the BF should move in with her.  Otherwise, its your house, your rules.

I would say, "if its not nice enough for him, then he can move into your place"

Read the book boundaries by dr Henry clowd.   Thank me later.

could have owned page 2 as well

Yep did that. we are going through the steps.

Never mix business and personal relationships. It will burn you.