Trying to find some channels that aren't all "top 10 booty exercises" that legit talk about weight loss and routines and stuff healthy food etc for my wife. She has tried alot of things but just needs someone else that talks her language, ya know?
Like female hodge twins without all the cursing.

found this one as an example:
Lean Secrets

How about a very small strong girl?

Marisa Inda

interesting but not exactly what im looking for

On instagram my wife and I follow Isabella von Weisenberg(spelling??). She is a Swedish powerlifter. Fun to watch. Not a motivational speaker or booty chick. Just seriously strong.

thats a good one!

How does she want to workout and how does she want to eat?

Does she want home workouts and bodyweight stuff or CF or bodybuilding?

For diet, does she want to loose weight, gain size etc? Paleo, keto etc etc.

While she pushes her app and some of her other stuff to some extent, the Jillian Michaels stuff is not bad...

https://www.youtube.com/user/JillianMichaels

needs to straight lose weight.
She wants to eat healthy.
I cant get her motivated to do much. She refuses to track any food, thinks just eating non processed food will help her lose weight.
she likes recipes and meal planning but I cant get her to put any of it into practice.

she has done keto several times, claims it does not work. But again, she doesnt track anything so you cant tell where she is on anything.

She has to choose.  You choosing for her isn't going to work.

A cheap used copy of p90x3 maybe, but again, it depends on what her vision of working out is.

I'm not choosing anything.
I'm just trying to find some other avenues of encouragement. Maybe she will listen to them because she won't do a thing I tell her to.

She did piyo (sp?) And liked it. She has several BB programs but she won't do them. She wanted to buy a new one and I told her not until she does one of the ones she has for a month.

I work my ass off in our home gym. She was supposed to use it with me and she never did. It's been a year or two.

Perhaps something to set a goal for? The (official) Spartan Race FB page often posts training and diet tips for those wanting to better themselves.

For instance, a mud run or obstacle course race that she has to train for (with you perhaps helping out) may be fun and bring some spark to the relationship.

I googled "mud run obstacle course race in Kentucky" and came up with this...

http://www.mudrunguide.com/directory/usa/kentucky-ky/

But there were tons of results so that might be worth checking out.

was actually thinking the same thing.

Ive got to get her moving in the meantime. she is so focussed on "eating clean" which is great and all but not going to help her lose a bunch of weight. I showed her several of the ones listed above, wouldnt give them the time of day. I dont get it, she used to like sports and stuff. She is awful about hitting a diet running, losing some weight, hitting a wall then giving up and gaining it all back. That is her super power basically.

My wife watches Heidi Somers on YouTube like it's her damn girl crush.  

It's given her motivation and some ideas for different exercises.  

Good luck!  We go to the gym together now some and we both enjoy it.

Well, eating right IS what will help you lose a bunch of weight, not working out, (you can't outrun the spoon) but it all depends on the definition of "eating clean"...my personal opinion is to figure out how you want to tackle macronutrient goals and calories and start tracking with myfitnesspal app to see how things REALLY affect you.

eating right is part of it but not tracking anything and just saying "this bagel has 7 grains its healthy!" doesnt work.
She REFUSES to use MFP or track any food and refuses to exercise. So that is that really, its her body not mine. I thought maybe I could find some other way to get her motivated, some other angle, but I think shes just given up on all of it. It seems the more I progress I make the less desire she has to do anything.

you may need a gym girlfriend

Not that those are the sorts of fuck fuck games you want to play with a marriage but being active with a group of friends might help motivate her to be able to join you.

I work out at home.

Well that would really drive the point home.

I love Piyo too, but I can't do it at home. I can't do crap at home. I have to have a gym membership or classes to go to or both. The weird thing is that doing stuff in a gym or studio will make me want to do stuff at home. But without the outside stuff, I just can't motivate.

You're not going to wish her or talk her into motivation. It has to come from her. You may just have to accept that you have a bigger gal for a wife. I do stuff I enjoy, but no amount of love for my man (or guilt at disappointing him) could keep me consistently doing stuff that sucks.

She has to want it, you can't make her want it, and it has to be fun.

eta: as for videos, women are annoying and gross.  I always just watch men. Especially the pretty ones. That's what I find motivating.

eta2: What about embracing her tendency to get bored with programs? Instead of fealing guilty about it, why not just do Piyo until it's not fun, then try aerial arts with silks, then mountain biking, then BJJ, then Barre.... as long as she's doing something, she's good. Guilt about quitting murders motivation.

Have you had a heart to heart about just exactly why it is not important to her? Does she have a sex drive? Does she frump around all day is baggy clothes?

My wife was never really into working out 'hard' until we worked out together. I would train hard and she would do a few machines, walk on the treadmill etc.

Now we work out together and she is making gains, getting strong and people are commenting about her shoulders, back and arms. She loves it now.

Anyways, is there something else going on, is the marriage otherwise okay?

I've seen in other threads about wives\divorce where the wife was not interested in working out etc and worry that may be where this could lead. I pray not and just hope it's perhaps something else going on.

Are her friends helping or hindering? Often times if a friend convinces her that it's a waste of time, it will get in her head that way.

Do you look at some obstacle course races in your area? I am sure you could find a 5k benefiting vets or something like that in your AO.

If she's into FB at all, have her check out Starting Strength Bar Belles group.  All are ladies who lift heavy.

She has at least 3 different BB DvD's that she can pick from as well as a half rack with 300 lbs of weight she can use.
I fully understand she has to want to do this. That is why I made this thread to hopefully find a way to spark some interest. My other issue is she lost 100 lbs before, we did some p90x together and she did really well with it. She would get up at 5am and workout, she was real thirsty, if that makes sense. she started nursing school and stress ate it all back, we had 2 kids and that just seems to have finished off any desire she had to maintain her health. I told her if she works out with any of the programs she has for one month she can buy any other program she wanted to do. I wasnt going to let her spend $60 to stick it on the shelf like the rest. Wouldnt do it. Ive told her 1000 times ANYTHING will get the ball rolling, do ANYTHING.
Her problem comes from a few things. An f ton of excuses. "I dont have time for that." "I dont FEEL like it..." "I just have to get motivated." etc...
She loves lists, shes makes lists for everything. Its good and bad. Instead of putting "workout for 30 minutes" at the top she puts it at the VERY bottom and magically never gets around to it. She has ZERO energy, she is literally running on diet mt dew/monsters and various other crap food like cheez-its and will feel guilty and go eat a salad/cucumbers occasionally. She is almost 40 and absolutely cannot keep this up forever. I think the problem is she knows its going to take a TON of work and dedication and she will have to see her own mortality and kind of face alot of her weakness and its going to hurt. IMO she keeps herself artificially busy as an excuse. She has little tolerance for being uncomfortable. I think her plan is to get the gastric sleeve/bypass thing done because "nothing else has worked."
she half needs an intervention. We did a healthy partners program through her employer they give $$ bonuses based on things like BMI, Cholesterol, food tracking, workout tracking, not smoking etc. I did all mine for a year and I am thinking I should get like $250-$300 from it all. She did none of it. I know she is unhappy with herself and wants to be able to run and do things with our kids. I know she can do it but she doesnt believe it.

heart to heart, i try not to be pushy about it. I feel like if I go ham about it she will just tap out completely with it. Anytime we discuss it as gently as I can all I get is "I know, im going to have to x,y,z." she has ZERO sex drive, maybe negative if that is possible. baggy clothes, not exactly. she dresses modestly as she can but also comfortably. shorts, t shirt and flip flops.

working out together was the idea, the problem is i progressed massively and she quit. I would gladly still work with her and help her. She likes to keep doing things wrong though and not actually do it right. Squat depth/form is a big one. "you need to squat lower honey, you arent hardly parallel..." "I cant!" "you have to work on it a bit it might take some time." "no thanks..."

marriage is fine, we have 3 kids and its pretty stressful at times. Our youngest is Autistic and our middle is extremely difficult child. We are focusing on getting rid of all debt and want to have a good life for our kids. My wife does go to school full time while working full time, her new job is really nice and alot less stress on her its 12 hour days but only 3 days a week. School seems insanely easy for her right now as she has maybe a 98% without even trying.

friends wise, we dont have much of a social life at all. She doesnt have a group of friends really that she hangs out with. My sister is fairly close with us and she has been doing alot of fitness stuff too lately. Didnt seem to have much of an effect on my wife's desire though. Overall i think she just feels so "behind" everyone else that she knows she cant catch up without some a serious 180. I think she would rather just dedicate her time else where since she probably feels like a "lost cause"

I mentioned doing a tough mudder next summer but the reality comes around that she couldnt do it and she doesnt have the dedication to prepare for it.

This isnt about me wanting some fit wife. This is about her health. She was near type 2 diabetes last bloodwork, she had thyroid issues but her levels are were fine last time they were checked. I dont like her feeling like she cant do things physically with her kids, I dont like her feeling down on herself. She wants to be the best mother she can be and not have kids that are embarrassed to be around her. These are her own words. I want nothing more than for her to succeed in her goals but I feel like it is only me.

I can see why that would frustrating and scary for you. You love her. You don't want her to get sick or die young. I get it.

I also know I couldn't use a home gym or DVDs, and that giving me any shit about my weight or health just makes me feel bad and I don't work out when I feel bad.

I don't know what works for her, but you know what hasn't worked and what's worked for a bit. She has to want to do the things that work for her at least for a bit. I don't think telling her she needs to work out will help. I don't think pointing at her dvds will help.

I don't know her, but if my husband was trying to help me with my weight I'd probably move out. People hate unsolicited advice when it criticizes how they are right now. I lost my best friend over stuff like offering to help get her a driver's license and insurance since she drove without them. Don't drive her away, since it won't help anyway. Just do fun stuff with her. Walk with her. Cook with her. Go to the pool. Go to an outside the house gym with her. Get on the Pilates reformer next to her or just leave her alone and love her as she is. You can't diet or work out for her. It sucks but she has to want it, and you can't make her want it.

I'm not on her about it, I don't nag her. She's an adult and can make her own decisions.
You wouldn't move out if you were saying "I cant keep up with my kids I've got to do something and make changes." I try and encourage her to do those active things but I don't get anywhere for the most part.

Edit: just want to say I appreciate your input and advice. I don't think you are wrong.

You're right. I don't know her or how it is. Maybe she could get an account? Here or bodybuilding.com? I mean, this has to come from her, right?

yep! I just want her to be happy and not have to feel like she cant do things like take our kids to the pool etc.
I had her join a FB group once, it was all women and I think it was a keto type group. She hated it. Even had a lady on there who said she would help her ever personally. Ive tried to get her to join myself and my sister on MFP just to encourage one another there, wont do it. She is pretty stubborn. :D
this winter Im going to try and join a gym for a few months, we are moving to a new place and I wont have time to get heat situated in the garage for workouts. Maybe I can get her to join too. She finds other women very catty and two faced. She used to play sports and was excellent at softball athletic etc. She just needs to find her passion again somehow.

And just like that she said "I'm going to start keto again after my birthday..."

I'd maybe try to focus on more manageable goals. To be honest i ended up barely skimming your last few posts as there is a lot going on there. She doesn't need to go full blown keto crossfit. Hell don't even worry about an exercise program. Diet will play a bigger roll anyway and doesn't really take any extra work, just better choices.

Maybe get her to cut soda or cheese it's. You could make some tasty healthy meals for both of you. Go for walks with her. Get to know each other again.

It's important to make lasting changes. If they are small positive changes that are easier to stick to it beats doing a program for a month to buy a new one and then quiting.

I agree with diet being the main focus. however I told her whatever she does she has to track her food otherwise she is wasting her time, flat out guessing at your calories is pointless imo. I told her I would rather her exercise regularly than to do keto. She did keto several times, she lost maybe 30 lbs and gave up. The diet mt dew has destroyed her sense of taste (my opinion) her brain is expecting that sweet taste anytime she eats or drinks. And she is fully addicted to it and cannot stop drinking it, she has tried many times over the last 10 years. The headaches come and she caves. Same with food she sees the "not allowed" list instead of the "allowed" list. Ive tried meal planning for her she just wont try anything new. Bacon wrapped asparagus? wont try it.
Ive told her to set 3 goals, a "this week goal" a "next 3 month goal" and a "6 month" goal. Thats how I started my own journey. Small goals that lead up to a bigger goal, like a pyramid.
I really feel like exercise is her key because everything with her changes when she exercises regularly. She becomes dedicated, she sees results faster, her mood and energy levels change, her stress goes down, her metabolism changes and she feels better. I remember being so proud of her when she would get up get her workout in and talk about how hard it was and then a week or two later it was "I made it all the way through without stopping!" etc. Those are the mental things she needs, those confidence builders. Ill work on getting her doing small things.

What about a shrink? In her shoes with mental blocks about exercise and diet, and lack of motivation I would be taking myself to a shrink. That's what they do. They help you figure out why you do weird stuff like sabotaging your health.  Compulsions like the mountain dew thing and things like over eating are shrink territory. Fix her head, and the other things will fall into place.

ETA: Just read your latest posts above. Not really sure what to say. Like BigEasysnow said, it really has to come from her and she has to WANT to change. We could give you ideas all day but if she wants to sit and drink mt dew, not much any of us can say.

I've had clients come to me when they said they would bike with their kids and they felt so out of shape, they needed to make changes. Another client came to me when her daughter started poking her fat and asked her why she was so "bubbly".

Perhaps something will happen in the future that will flip the switch. Heart attack, betus, bad test results.

I have a hard time with this because I do not think I could be with someone who doesn't enjoy working out. Just about all my past girlfriends and my wife I've met at the gym.

I wish I could offer more advice etc. Like they say with alcoholics and drug addicts....perhaps she will need to hit that "rock bottom" place in her life where she will want to be fit again and enjoy the healthy lifestyle.

I just came across this site today...(no, not a pron site)

https://www.girlsgonestrong.com/

They have a Youtube channel that goes by the same name. Videos look pretty good. Seems like good info.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxIfAaGzy56yQWEX5mHARpw

Check out Lindsey Matthews of IdealFit, I know/have trained with her personally, my wife still does her training and nutrition programs and sees great results every time she tries. Lindsey will put together a nutritional plan and provides complete structured workouts, as well as social media support pages and those sorts of things to keep everyone motivated.  Here's her six-week challenge, one of many things she will do, but to give you an idea.

https://www.idealfit.com/challenges/trainer-lindsey/6-week-fit-body-challenge.list