Just do it.
It is sometimes best to ask for forgiveness, than ask for permission.

Rather than trying to talk her into it, maybe you should change your approach a little.

She's worried about getting stung. Is she or the child allergic?

If not, why is she so worried about a bee sting or two? Did she grow up in the city without every being stung?

Sure it hurts. It's no fun. But in the larger scheme of things, all kids are stung by bees unless they are very, VERY sheltered. It's just part of life.

Also...have you considered asking her to go and observe another beekeeper working with his bees?

If she could see this, and understand how important it is for her child to understand life and its cycles, and that beekeeping is a wonderful way to teach responsibility and life and death and all of that, while potentially being a first "income" project for the child, and a great way for father/kid to bond, she might get it.

But just "talking her into it" probably won't work, as there is every good chance that, since you've been married for a while, you may not be truly listening very well to her objections. If she senses that she's not being "heard" and that you are just trying to push your agenda, she won't consider the valid points you are making.

Tough thing. But if you can help her to see why it's so important to you, and why you want your family involved in it, she might get it.

You must work out a compromise...one in which you both get what you want. She understands that the actual risk is minimal, and you learn how to bring her into something unfamiliar and you both grow closer in the process.



Edited to add: As I see that her objection is "getting stung" and she stood in those bees and did not get stung but did not soften toward the bees, I have to say, "that is not her real, deep, actual objection." So it may be that you need to talk to her and figure out what her real fear and worry about this actually is.

And the thing is...YOU WILL get stung. And if they work with you on the bees, they will get stung too. It's just the way it is. You'll open that hive at some point, and the bees will be pissed, and you'll get stung. STings are part of beekeeping. So telling her she won't get stung is not going to win the day for you.

Figure out what the actual issue is.

Maybe she just doesn't want "one more thing" to take your attention?

The "better to ask forgiveness" approach is not going to work. We've been married 15 years and I learned a long time ago where that could be applied and where it should not.

I have several friends that have offered to have her come over when they are in their hives but she won't go. I think at this point she is just being stubborn and getting stung is the only reason she can still stick to. None of us are allergic to bees (that we know of).

Good luck. My wife has a phobia of any stinging insect so it's a no go for me. Maybe when the kids are older because that's a concern for her as well. I have a friend who keeps bees so it would actually be easy to start the hobby.

I'm in search of somewhere that I can put two or three hives for next spring if she doesn't come around to the idea. Based on the pending ordinance my friend won't be allowed more than the three he has based on his lot size.

I almost offered to talk to her...or email with her or something....if she has any questions for a female beekeeper.

But I wasn't sure that would make any difference.

To the OP, the offer is there, if I can be of help.

I've had bees on my property for 3 years now. The hives are right by the house, my wife mows right past them with the mower... you get the idea. She told me when I got them, "The day I get stung is the day the bees are gone"

That day hasn't come yet. In 3 years of living here with the beehives right by the house she hasn't been stung a single time.

Yes, he actually has offered to let me keep them there. I've been kind of busy this summer with my aquaponics system + garden (small) + chickens (never kept before this spring) so I'll ask him if the offer is still open, maybe next year. I would really prefer them here on my property just for the convenience.

What were your initial objections?

If you accept that, then it is your choice to just give up.

"Just because" is a reason (and not a good one even then) that we use with children when we are too lazy to explain why they should not run into the street.

This is not something you say to your spouse, and you do not have to accept it.

It's not appropriate.

I don't mean to tell you how to manage your relationship. But would she let you get away with that if she wanted to buy something expensive and you said no?

So I will now shut up about this.