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Same here. Technically, the water is Ok to drink; however, within about 30 or so seconds after contact with the air, it starts to look and smell "rusty". I've heard that issue can be remedied and perhaps some day I will do that. For now, we use the water supplied by our HOA. Fortunately for us, the guy who works on our HOA water is a stickler for doing things the right way and the water is fantastic.
In terms of bleaching a well, I've heard that dumping some bleach down the well is a very temporary approach. Having said that, I've also heard that there are bleach dispensers that can be mounted to a well that will dump a predetermined amount of chem down the hole. I am somewhat skeptical about that.
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We have that iron issue. Its dissolved iron, and like you said, it doesn't oxidize until it contacts air. A water softener gets rid of 95% of it, and only the toilet shows light staining. Before the softener, if you filled the tub, it was like a bunch of really dehydrated folks filled the tub with piss. Could not see more than 6 inches into it. Of course, the softener runs every other day to deal with it.
For water for cooking/drinking, we use a double bucket gravity system. The water has time to oxidize and rust in the top bucket before filtration, and it is easily filtered out once it does that. The water we drink and cook with is crystal clear, and stays that way.