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A tale of two bullies.
10/16/2011 12:35:52 AM
The last two weeks have just totally taken it's toll on me parenting wise.
I have two teenagers. Neither are perfect but there are lines that should not be crossed.
My son is 14. He is 5 '11 and 250 lbs worth a kid. He also has Tourettes. This is not a well understood disorder. Tourettes includes tics, ( they can be physical or vocal)
Tourettes is a cluster syndrome. It's not enough that these kids have tics but they also have OCD, can have ADD and other issues as well. My son has Tics in his face, his abdomen, and a variety of vocal tics. He does have the cussing and some very embarrassing vocal tics.
or insulting one and when the pressure is on for them not to do these things that is when the tics become even worse. For the most part he stays alone. As much as I have tried to keep him mainstreamed his entire world is just hostile.
It doesn't matter what setting I have him in he just doesn't fit in and people don't understand the morbidity of this. He is also just a target where ever he goes. Some of his issues are compounded by the need to fit in and he will do almost anything to make that happen to his detriment. This past week he they jumped him in PE and blackened an eye. This is the third time he has been hit at school. His entire personality has changed and he has become more withdrawn. He has been in counseling for a year now with an intensive program over the summer. We aren't making any progress. It doesn't help that we these kids are relentless and even when my son makes good choices to stay clear of them and do what we ask him to do he still comes home with bruises on his arms and back.
As I was trying to get the "proof" together that we need to file charges against this group of kids, I came home to find a black bag with some of my daughter things in it that had been defecated on and a threatening note on my daughters car.
My daughter is 16, a straight A student, outgoing, cute and with the exception of sarcasm she is a good kid. Over the summer my daughter had distance herself from a girl she had been best friends with ,who she knew was being risky. To no ones surprise she is now 16 and pregnant. This is a horrible situation as her family is very religious. My daughter had been asked by another student if she knew if the "rumors" were true. My daughter stupidly confirmed the rumor. The 15 yo father of this girls baby is the one that told everyone. Since then her parents left threatening and demeaning messages on my daughters phone, informed me that the threats their daughter made about having her beat up was the least my daughter deserved. They blamed the boy and the boys father for their embarrassment, commented that if their daughter were to have a miscarriage that would be fine with them. and much more. Anyway I tried to be compassionate and told my daughter to let this blow over but to now say anything to anyone else at all with regards to what they are going through. On Sunday my daughter received another text from this girl requesting an item of clothing she had left here some time ago. Since I didn't trust this family after they said they were ok with having my daughter harmed I delivered the t-shirt. They mom asked why my daughter had not brought it over to them. I explained that after the text messages phone messages and letter that I have forbade my daughter to have any further contact. The mom was furious and slammed the door in my face.
The daughter sent yet another message about how I was protecting my daughter and she should take what she had coming.
That was it. The text was a ruse to get my daughter over to their house so they could hurt her.
Between the two I have had enough. Monday I went to the school and the police. Here is the astounding results. The school acted immediately with regards to my daughter. It was clear cut threats. She had asked several times for them to leaver her alone. A restraining order was issued within 24 hours.
With my son because he cusses. is in special ed classes, and because he has ODD, we have to provide more proof. The screen shot of the photoshopped pic and website wasn't enough. They didn't deny that he had been beaten up at school, they just said that because he cusses the students felt "justified". They would need to investigate further. No one had ever seen him be an aggressor. He didn't hit back and school admitted this. But they didn't want to act right away despite him being jumped. By no means is this kid perfect.
I have reached the end of my rope in trying to get what I need for him. Every day this is a constant struggle. And I just don't get why I have to work 5000 times as hard to get this kid a non hostile environment.
I am out of options and can't believe the difference in how this has been handled.
I have two teenagers. Neither are perfect but there are lines that should not be crossed.
My son is 14. He is 5 '11 and 250 lbs worth a kid. He also has Tourettes. This is not a well understood disorder. Tourettes includes tics, ( they can be physical or vocal)
Tourettes is a cluster syndrome. It's not enough that these kids have tics but they also have OCD, can have ADD and other issues as well. My son has Tics in his face, his abdomen, and a variety of vocal tics. He does have the cussing and some very embarrassing vocal tics.
or insulting one and when the pressure is on for them not to do these things that is when the tics become even worse. For the most part he stays alone. As much as I have tried to keep him mainstreamed his entire world is just hostile.
It doesn't matter what setting I have him in he just doesn't fit in and people don't understand the morbidity of this. He is also just a target where ever he goes. Some of his issues are compounded by the need to fit in and he will do almost anything to make that happen to his detriment. This past week he they jumped him in PE and blackened an eye. This is the third time he has been hit at school. His entire personality has changed and he has become more withdrawn. He has been in counseling for a year now with an intensive program over the summer. We aren't making any progress. It doesn't help that we these kids are relentless and even when my son makes good choices to stay clear of them and do what we ask him to do he still comes home with bruises on his arms and back.
As I was trying to get the "proof" together that we need to file charges against this group of kids, I came home to find a black bag with some of my daughter things in it that had been defecated on and a threatening note on my daughters car.
My daughter is 16, a straight A student, outgoing, cute and with the exception of sarcasm she is a good kid. Over the summer my daughter had distance herself from a girl she had been best friends with ,who she knew was being risky. To no ones surprise she is now 16 and pregnant. This is a horrible situation as her family is very religious. My daughter had been asked by another student if she knew if the "rumors" were true. My daughter stupidly confirmed the rumor. The 15 yo father of this girls baby is the one that told everyone. Since then her parents left threatening and demeaning messages on my daughters phone, informed me that the threats their daughter made about having her beat up was the least my daughter deserved. They blamed the boy and the boys father for their embarrassment, commented that if their daughter were to have a miscarriage that would be fine with them. and much more. Anyway I tried to be compassionate and told my daughter to let this blow over but to now say anything to anyone else at all with regards to what they are going through. On Sunday my daughter received another text from this girl requesting an item of clothing she had left here some time ago. Since I didn't trust this family after they said they were ok with having my daughter harmed I delivered the t-shirt. They mom asked why my daughter had not brought it over to them. I explained that after the text messages phone messages and letter that I have forbade my daughter to have any further contact. The mom was furious and slammed the door in my face.
The daughter sent yet another message about how I was protecting my daughter and she should take what she had coming.
That was it. The text was a ruse to get my daughter over to their house so they could hurt her.
Between the two I have had enough. Monday I went to the school and the police. Here is the astounding results. The school acted immediately with regards to my daughter. It was clear cut threats. She had asked several times for them to leaver her alone. A restraining order was issued within 24 hours.
With my son because he cusses. is in special ed classes, and because he has ODD, we have to provide more proof. The screen shot of the photoshopped pic and website wasn't enough. They didn't deny that he had been beaten up at school, they just said that because he cusses the students felt "justified". They would need to investigate further. No one had ever seen him be an aggressor. He didn't hit back and school admitted this. But they didn't want to act right away despite him being jumped. By no means is this kid perfect.
I have reached the end of my rope in trying to get what I need for him. Every day this is a constant struggle. And I just don't get why I have to work 5000 times as hard to get this kid a non hostile environment.
I am out of options and can't believe the difference in how this has been handled.
10/16/2011 12:42:23 AM
Schools hate being contacted by lawyers.
-Foxxz
-Foxxz
10/16/2011 12:43:33 AM
Just tell the school admin if he is assaulted further after they have been notified, you will bring a lawsuit against them. Then, if it happens again, do it. Schools damn well understand that very well and your son is their responsibility while on school property. They KNOW they are on the hook, they have been trying to bury the problem because it's a whole lot easier for them to just hide it.
As far as your daughter and her issues go, no contact at all with them and your daughter just needs to get on with her life. And she needs to quit gossiping, it was never her job to tell the world someone else problems, especially a friend or former friend's personal issue. She needs to accept part of the blame for that because she opened her mouth when she shouldn't have. That's part of growing up and is pretty damn hard for even adults to follow.
As far as your daughter and her issues go, no contact at all with them and your daughter just needs to get on with her life. And she needs to quit gossiping, it was never her job to tell the world someone else problems, especially a friend or former friend's personal issue. She needs to accept part of the blame for that because she opened her mouth when she shouldn't have. That's part of growing up and is pretty damn hard for even adults to follow.
10/16/2011 2:06:37 AM
Originally Posted By fxntime:
Just tell the school admin if he is assaulted further after they have been notified, you will bring a lawsuit against them. Then, if it happens again, do it. Schools damn well understand that very well and your son is their responsibility while on school property. They KNOW they are on the hook, they have been trying to bury the problem because it's a whole lot easier for them to just hide it.
As far as your daughter and her issues go, no contact at all with them and your daughter just needs to get on with her life. And she needs to quit gossiping, it was never her job to tell the world someone else problems, especially a friend or former friend's personal issue. She needs to accept part of the blame for that because she opened her mouth when she shouldn't have. That's part of growing up and is pretty damn hard for even adults to follow.
Just tell the school admin if he is assaulted further after they have been notified, you will bring a lawsuit against them. Then, if it happens again, do it. Schools damn well understand that very well and your son is their responsibility while on school property. They KNOW they are on the hook, they have been trying to bury the problem because it's a whole lot easier for them to just hide it.
As far as your daughter and her issues go, no contact at all with them and your daughter just needs to get on with her life. And she needs to quit gossiping, it was never her job to tell the world someone else problems, especially a friend or former friend's personal issue. She needs to accept part of the blame for that because she opened her mouth when she shouldn't have. That's part of growing up and is pretty damn hard for even adults to follow.
I would hardly think that confirming a rumor (although admittedly not the best decision) qualifies as gossiping. And it definitely doesn't mean she should be accepting any of the blame for threats and attempts to harm her. This person's family sounds completely insane.
I really don't get what's wrong with some kids these days. I had it pretty bad when I was in school, but not nearly as bad as a lot of kids seem to have it now. The idea that it's ok to beat up or harass kids just because they're different and you don't understand them is completely foreign to me.
10/16/2011 8:41:16 AM
Originally Posted By fxntime:
Just tell the school admin if he is assaulted further after they have been notified, you will bring a lawsuit against them. Then, if it happens again, do it. Schools damn well understand that very well and your son is their responsibility while on school property. They KNOW they are on the hook, they have been trying to bury the problem because it's a whole lot easier for them to just hide it.
As far as your daughter and her issues go, no contact at all with them and your daughter just needs to get on with her life. And she needs to quit gossiping, it was never her job to tell the world someone else problems, especially a friend or former friend's personal issue. She needs to accept part of the blame for that because she opened her mouth when she shouldn't have. That's part of growing up and is pretty damn hard for even adults to follow.
Just tell the school admin if he is assaulted further after they have been notified, you will bring a lawsuit against them. Then, if it happens again, do it. Schools damn well understand that very well and your son is their responsibility while on school property. They KNOW they are on the hook, they have been trying to bury the problem because it's a whole lot easier for them to just hide it.
As far as your daughter and her issues go, no contact at all with them and your daughter just needs to get on with her life. And she needs to quit gossiping, it was never her job to tell the world someone else problems, especially a friend or former friend's personal issue. She needs to accept part of the blame for that because she opened her mouth when she shouldn't have. That's part of growing up and is pretty damn hard for even adults to follow.
Absolutely spot on with what I had already told my daughter. She also is going into nursing and talking about anybody's personal issue will be a crime. Girls are horrible about gossiping.She was not all lily white in this situation. Like I said. my kids are not without fault.
And I don't claim that my son is a saint either. I am damned if I do and damned if I don't. There are no "private" schools to move him to. They tend to be far worse when it comes to understanding TS. I expect him to behave and be polite regardless.
Right now he is so angry he is self destructive. I have tapped every resource I can to help him. The bullying . especially the photo shopped pic as been ongoing since the 6th grade. This particular group of kids stay in trouble. I can't say my son makes good choices and I can sty I stay on top of it and am doing everything I can. The school does know. He is going to offend people. Especially when under stress. I am getting to the point that I just want to take him out of school all together. I also have no choice but to work. This is where our medical benefits are. I am afraid to isolate him even more.
Really at a loss. Lawyers are expensive. i just dont have the money to do it.
10/16/2011 8:48:34 AM
Originally Posted By Tail_Lights_Fade:
I would hardly think that confirming a rumor (although admittedly not the best decision) qualifies as gossiping. And it definitely doesn't mean she should be accepting any of the blame for threats and attempts to harm her. This person's family sounds completely insane.
I really don't get what's wrong with some kids these days. I had it pretty bad when I was in school, but not nearly as bad as a lot of kids seem to have it now. The idea that it's ok to beat up or harass kids just because they're different and you don't understand them is completely foreign to me.
Originally Posted By fxntime:
Just tell the school admin if he is assaulted further after they have been notified, you will bring a lawsuit against them. Then, if it happens again, do it. Schools damn well understand that very well and your son is their responsibility while on school property. They KNOW they are on the hook, they have been trying to bury the problem because it's a whole lot easier for them to just hide it.
As far as your daughter and her issues go, no contact at all with them and your daughter just needs to get on with her life. And she needs to quit gossiping, it was never her job to tell the world someone else problems, especially a friend or former friend's personal issue. She needs to accept part of the blame for that because she opened her mouth when she shouldn't have. That's part of growing up and is pretty damn hard for even adults to follow.
Just tell the school admin if he is assaulted further after they have been notified, you will bring a lawsuit against them. Then, if it happens again, do it. Schools damn well understand that very well and your son is their responsibility while on school property. They KNOW they are on the hook, they have been trying to bury the problem because it's a whole lot easier for them to just hide it.
As far as your daughter and her issues go, no contact at all with them and your daughter just needs to get on with her life. And she needs to quit gossiping, it was never her job to tell the world someone else problems, especially a friend or former friend's personal issue. She needs to accept part of the blame for that because she opened her mouth when she shouldn't have. That's part of growing up and is pretty damn hard for even adults to follow.
I would hardly think that confirming a rumor (although admittedly not the best decision) qualifies as gossiping. And it definitely doesn't mean she should be accepting any of the blame for threats and attempts to harm her. This person's family sounds completely insane.
I really don't get what's wrong with some kids these days. I had it pretty bad when I was in school, but not nearly as bad as a lot of kids seem to have it now. The idea that it's ok to beat up or harass kids just because they're different and you don't understand them is completely foreign to me.
It was wrong for my daughter to have affirmed it. She should have referred this girl to the other girls family. My daughter is mature in many ways but she still doesn't have the world knowledge to process how her name being associated with this other girls information could be harmful She did apologize. The real trigger for this girl to involve her parents was when she asked to use my daughters car and my daughter knows full well that we would not permit this. The ex gf became livid and verbally abusive and involved her parents at that point. This girl had already gotten two speeding tickets and totaled her own car.
Honestly I was a target all through school as well. But I am actually thankful today for not being with the in crowd
10/16/2011 9:01:57 AM
Your giant tourettes having son needs to be taught to defend himself. Hands get put on him he hits them until they stop. He can learn to protect himself. Teach him how and let him live and learn.
Nothing worse can happen top a bully then have a "retard" kick their ass. I am not saying anything bad about your kid, just letting you know the easiest way to fix the problem.
Nothing worse can happen top a bully then have a "retard" kick their ass. I am not saying anything bad about your kid, just letting you know the easiest way to fix the problem.
10/23/2011 12:53:14 AM
You don't necessarily need to have the money to hire an attorney. You just have to put the fear of a lawsuit in their minds and that should be sufficient. In some states, it's actually written into state law that schools are legally obligated to provide a safe environment for their students. If your state is one of those, pull out the law and the citation and ask what they're going to do about it. I don't have a lot of patience for schools taking a passive role in that. If it happens to my kid once, I'm meeting with the principal and superintendent. If it happens a second time, it's the attorneys, with everything documented.
10/23/2011 2:21:48 AM
I'd speak to several attorneys, you may find one willing to send a free letter to the school reminding them of their responsibilities and liabilities. I'd also get LEO's involved. Adults contacting your daughter and threatening her? That deserves special attention.
Be sure to remind your kids, things within their control have an impact on the family. Choose friends wisely and bail when it starts looking bad.
Good luck.
Be sure to remind your kids, things within their control have an impact on the family. Choose friends wisely and bail when it starts looking bad.
Good luck.
10/23/2011 11:43:28 PM
OP, sorry your kids are going through hard times. Good to know that the school is taking steps to improve the situation w/r/t your daughter being threatened. Hopefully her real friends will stand by her and are smart enough to see who's at fault (her former friend and her dysfunctional family...). Girls that age want to be liked/loved, and need constant confirmation from their peer group.
However, regarding your son, I'm not sure if "mainstreaming" kids who clearly are not "mainstream", so to speak, is always a good idea. Public school can be hard enough even on kids who don't have psychiatric issues, and from your post it seems you are not one of these parents who insist that "there's nothing wrong" with their kid even though the kid has a bona-fide diagnosable condition. As your son gets older (and stronger), it will be harder for him to just take all the abuse that the "normal" kids are dishing out. He may either snap and strike back (and then get into real trouble, even though his tormentors clearly deserve a smackdown), or internalize it (which adds psychological trauma). Have you considered removing him from this "mainstreamed" environment since it seems to be detrimental to him?
Anyways, good luck, and prayers sent...
However, regarding your son, I'm not sure if "mainstreaming" kids who clearly are not "mainstream", so to speak, is always a good idea. Public school can be hard enough even on kids who don't have psychiatric issues, and from your post it seems you are not one of these parents who insist that "there's nothing wrong" with their kid even though the kid has a bona-fide diagnosable condition. As your son gets older (and stronger), it will be harder for him to just take all the abuse that the "normal" kids are dishing out. He may either snap and strike back (and then get into real trouble, even though his tormentors clearly deserve a smackdown), or internalize it (which adds psychological trauma). Have you considered removing him from this "mainstreamed" environment since it seems to be detrimental to him?
Anyways, good luck, and prayers sent...
10/24/2011 7:25:56 PM
Originally Posted By EastcARstle:
OP, sorry your kids are going through hard times. Good to know that the school is taking steps to improve the situation w/r/t your daughter being threatened. Hopefully her real friends will stand by her and are smart enough to see who's at fault (her former friend and her dysfunctional family...). Girls that age want to be liked/loved, and need constant confirmation from their peer group.
However, regarding your son, I'm not sure if "mainstreaming" kids who clearly are not "mainstream", so to speak, is always a good idea. Public school can be hard enough even on kids who don't have psychiatric issues, and from your post it seems you are not one of these parents who insist that "there's nothing wrong" with their kid even though the kid has a bona-fide diagnosable condition. As your son gets older (and stronger), it will be harder for him to just take all the abuse that the "normal" kids are dishing out. He may either snap and strike back (and then get into real trouble, even though his tormentors clearly deserve a smackdown), or internalize it (which adds psychological trauma). Have you considered removing him from this "mainstreamed" environment since it seems to be detrimental to him?
Anyways, good luck, and prayers sent...
OP, sorry your kids are going through hard times. Good to know that the school is taking steps to improve the situation w/r/t your daughter being threatened. Hopefully her real friends will stand by her and are smart enough to see who's at fault (her former friend and her dysfunctional family...). Girls that age want to be liked/loved, and need constant confirmation from their peer group.
However, regarding your son, I'm not sure if "mainstreaming" kids who clearly are not "mainstream", so to speak, is always a good idea. Public school can be hard enough even on kids who don't have psychiatric issues, and from your post it seems you are not one of these parents who insist that "there's nothing wrong" with their kid even though the kid has a bona-fide diagnosable condition. As your son gets older (and stronger), it will be harder for him to just take all the abuse that the "normal" kids are dishing out. He may either snap and strike back (and then get into real trouble, even though his tormentors clearly deserve a smackdown), or internalize it (which adds psychological trauma). Have you considered removing him from this "mainstreamed" environment since it seems to be detrimental to him?
Anyways, good luck, and prayers sent...
You are kind and wise and I appreciate the prayers.
I looked closely at home schooling last year when this just got worse after a teacher called him a retard and an idiot in front of the entire class.
I have tried parochial or private school settings. That setting is much less tolerant and he really can't keep up.
Because he doesn't do well in those settings I am currently home schooling him for religion classes. He is cooperative in this setting but tends to not do well with exclusionary environments. He gets lonely and it is harder for him to warm up to new situations.
Home schooling is still on the table and I have looked at sponsoring schools and curriculum. We still have to have him involved in social activities with his peers.
The other challenge is that I would have to do all his schooling in the evening. He doesn't handle down time or creating his own structure well. So filling the time during the day is of concern.
Also quitting my job is not an option. I am the source of our medical benefits. It's not off the table and depending on how the next few weeks go that may be what I resort too.
10/25/2011 9:07:24 AM
Originally Posted By angelfire:
You are kind and wise and I appreciate the prayers.
I looked closely at home schooling last year when this just got worse after a teacher called him a retard and an idiot in front of the entire class.
I have tried parochial or private school settings. That setting is much less tolerant and he really can't keep up.
Because he doesn't do well in those settings I am currently home schooling him for religion classes. He is cooperative in this setting but tends to not do well with exclusionary environments. He gets lonely and it is harder for him to warm up to new situations.
Home schooling is still on the table and I have looked at sponsoring schools and curriculum. We still have to have him involved in social activities with his peers.
The other challenge is that I would have to do all his schooling in the evening. He doesn't handle down time or creating his own structure well. So filling the time during the day is of concern.
Also quitting my job is not an option. I am the source of our medical benefits. It's not off the table and depending on how the next few weeks go that may be what I resort too.
Originally Posted By EastcARstle:
OP, sorry your kids are going through hard times. Good to know that the school is taking steps to improve the situation w/r/t your daughter being threatened. Hopefully her real friends will stand by her and are smart enough to see who's at fault (her former friend and her dysfunctional family...). Girls that age want to be liked/loved, and need constant confirmation from their peer group.
However, regarding your son, I'm not sure if "mainstreaming" kids who clearly are not "mainstream", so to speak, is always a good idea. Public school can be hard enough even on kids who don't have psychiatric issues, and from your post it seems you are not one of these parents who insist that "there's nothing wrong" with their kid even though the kid has a bona-fide diagnosable condition. As your son gets older (and stronger), it will be harder for him to just take all the abuse that the "normal" kids are dishing out. He may either snap and strike back (and then get into real trouble, even though his tormentors clearly deserve a smackdown), or internalize it (which adds psychological trauma). Have you considered removing him from this "mainstreamed" environment since it seems to be detrimental to him?
Anyways, good luck, and prayers sent...
OP, sorry your kids are going through hard times. Good to know that the school is taking steps to improve the situation w/r/t your daughter being threatened. Hopefully her real friends will stand by her and are smart enough to see who's at fault (her former friend and her dysfunctional family...). Girls that age want to be liked/loved, and need constant confirmation from their peer group.
However, regarding your son, I'm not sure if "mainstreaming" kids who clearly are not "mainstream", so to speak, is always a good idea. Public school can be hard enough even on kids who don't have psychiatric issues, and from your post it seems you are not one of these parents who insist that "there's nothing wrong" with their kid even though the kid has a bona-fide diagnosable condition. As your son gets older (and stronger), it will be harder for him to just take all the abuse that the "normal" kids are dishing out. He may either snap and strike back (and then get into real trouble, even though his tormentors clearly deserve a smackdown), or internalize it (which adds psychological trauma). Have you considered removing him from this "mainstreamed" environment since it seems to be detrimental to him?
Anyways, good luck, and prayers sent...
You are kind and wise and I appreciate the prayers.
I looked closely at home schooling last year when this just got worse after a teacher called him a retard and an idiot in front of the entire class.
I have tried parochial or private school settings. That setting is much less tolerant and he really can't keep up.
Because he doesn't do well in those settings I am currently home schooling him for religion classes. He is cooperative in this setting but tends to not do well with exclusionary environments. He gets lonely and it is harder for him to warm up to new situations.
Home schooling is still on the table and I have looked at sponsoring schools and curriculum. We still have to have him involved in social activities with his peers.
The other challenge is that I would have to do all his schooling in the evening. He doesn't handle down time or creating his own structure well. So filling the time during the day is of concern.
Also quitting my job is not an option. I am the source of our medical benefits. It's not off the table and depending on how the next few weeks go that may be what I resort too.
Maybe you could find someone in your area who has taught special ed kids who now tutors/teaches and have them home school your son. If there are no other options would it be possible to have an assembly at the school about Tourette's syndrome to help others better understand what he is dealing with?
10/25/2011 9:12:05 AM
Originally Posted By Foxxz:
Schools hate being contacted by lawyers.
-Foxxz
Schools hate being contacted by lawyers.
-Foxxz
Above all else, this.
10/25/2011 10:38:06 AM
OP,
You might want to try and get your son into some classes for self defense... tell him not to pound on someone just because, but if he's jumped then to go ahead and release the Kraken. It'll probably only happen once and when they're picking their teeth out of his knuckles, they'll realize he's no longer a target.
I don't know what to tell you about your daughter... other than to just comment that the other child's parents are seriously out of line and need to speak with the police for making threats.
You might want to try and get your son into some classes for self defense... tell him not to pound on someone just because, but if he's jumped then to go ahead and release the Kraken. It'll probably only happen once and when they're picking their teeth out of his knuckles, they'll realize he's no longer a target.
I don't know what to tell you about your daughter... other than to just comment that the other child's parents are seriously out of line and need to speak with the police for making threats.
10/26/2011 12:21:07 PM
Originally Posted By vengarr:
Your giant tourettes having son needs to be taught to defend himself. Hands get put on him he hits them until they stop. He can learn to protect himself. Teach him how and let him live and learn.
Nothing worse can happen top a bully then have a "retard" kick their ass. I am not saying anything bad about your kid, just letting you know the easiest way to fix the problem.
Your giant tourettes having son needs to be taught to defend himself. Hands get put on him he hits them until they stop. He can learn to protect himself. Teach him how and let him live and learn.
Nothing worse can happen top a bully then have a "retard" kick their ass. I am not saying anything bad about your kid, just letting you know the easiest way to fix the problem.
i'm going to have to go with this answer as well. maybe get him involved in a martial art so he can learn self discipline along with some good training. he would probably be killer on the school wrestling team
10/26/2011 7:27:42 PM
*You need to document everything (journal it), maintain copies of all texts , emails,all contacts good and bad. Everytime you speak with an "official" person get a business card from them and staple it to your file notes.
*Next, you need to record what you can with dated pictures and videos of damage etc. If your state allows single person recording of conversations do it.... All phone calls etc.
*Talk to a lawyer it's free the first time. Have him give notice to the school to provide a safe and secure environment for your son and daughter (it'll cost $300.00 =/- )
*Contact the Americans with Disabilities government office for your state or at the federal level.
*Contact the State Department of Education/special needs speak at length with them. Make them provide you physical copies of all policies and rights of special needs students and a safe environment.
*Anytime physical contact or a threat is received by your son and daughter report it to the police.
*Restraining orders are useless in keeping people away, However, they are powerful in criminal court and carry weight in civil court. Get them and keep them active. Force the school to enforce distances etc.
People are going to become very pissed off at you and your family. They will continue to do stupid shit, the more frustrated they become. So toughen up, and keep twisting back. Let everyone know your kids and family are not victims.
It's very telling that the school wants to make it a mutual fault upon your son to provoke a physical attack. Bullshit! Those kids could of swore back at him and moved on.. You need to grab the principal by his knarfly's and twist them to the point of bursting. And make him learn this mantra "No one is meant to be another's punching bag"
I don't mean to be crass. I'm not a fan for mainstreaming students with special needs at the jr.high and high school levels. I think it causes, the special needs children, a greater amount of trouble,to their well being and safety. During these hormonal years; instead of the understanding, and harmony that is touted by the professionals..
You have enough on your plate as it is. Stay strong and Get mean.. Prayers are out bound for you and yours.
ST~
NOTE; I'd like to add to the self defence thought for your son. IMO It wouldn't be wise at this time to have him or convince him to strike back at this juncture. It could cause more problems than it could solve. Just my opinion.
Now I have been involved with the martial arts since 1965. And there is nothing better that you could do for your son (and daughter) to enroll them into a program. Infact it may just be the key to allow your son an hour of peace from his tics,as his mind, body, and spirit are involved in unison . What now will happen, you will probably be bombarded with suggestions of forms and schools to seek out. Shoot me a PM if you would like to discuss this further. .
*Next, you need to record what you can with dated pictures and videos of damage etc. If your state allows single person recording of conversations do it.... All phone calls etc.
*Talk to a lawyer it's free the first time. Have him give notice to the school to provide a safe and secure environment for your son and daughter (it'll cost $300.00 =/- )
*Contact the Americans with Disabilities government office for your state or at the federal level.
*Contact the State Department of Education/special needs speak at length with them. Make them provide you physical copies of all policies and rights of special needs students and a safe environment.
*Anytime physical contact or a threat is received by your son and daughter report it to the police.
*Restraining orders are useless in keeping people away, However, they are powerful in criminal court and carry weight in civil court. Get them and keep them active. Force the school to enforce distances etc.
People are going to become very pissed off at you and your family. They will continue to do stupid shit, the more frustrated they become. So toughen up, and keep twisting back. Let everyone know your kids and family are not victims.
It's very telling that the school wants to make it a mutual fault upon your son to provoke a physical attack. Bullshit! Those kids could of swore back at him and moved on.. You need to grab the principal by his knarfly's and twist them to the point of bursting. And make him learn this mantra "No one is meant to be another's punching bag"
I don't mean to be crass. I'm not a fan for mainstreaming students with special needs at the jr.high and high school levels. I think it causes, the special needs children, a greater amount of trouble,to their well being and safety. During these hormonal years; instead of the understanding, and harmony that is touted by the professionals..
You have enough on your plate as it is. Stay strong and Get mean.. Prayers are out bound for you and yours.
ST~
NOTE; I'd like to add to the self defence thought for your son. IMO It wouldn't be wise at this time to have him or convince him to strike back at this juncture. It could cause more problems than it could solve. Just my opinion.
Now I have been involved with the martial arts since 1965. And there is nothing better that you could do for your son (and daughter) to enroll them into a program. Infact it may just be the key to allow your son an hour of peace from his tics,as his mind, body, and spirit are involved in unison . What now will happen, you will probably be bombarded with suggestions of forms and schools to seek out. Shoot me a PM if you would like to discuss this further. .
